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i can't stand my husband right now. i'm pregnant right now, but i don't think it's just hormones. advice?

sorry, this may sound vent-ish. first of all, my first pregnancy i was fine. i didn't have any cravings hardly, was only sick for a few weeks, etc. this time around i'm really sick, crave things so badly it wakes me up and i can't stop thinking about it, i'm exhausted (still, and i'm almost 15 weeks), watch our 2 1/2 yr old full time, am really achey (back, legs, boobs), do all the housework, and i'm unpacking still by myself from a move 3/4 of the way across the country (he's in the army). he gets on my case about keeping stuff straight, gets annoyed when he has to listen to me throw up, and just kind of ignores stuff. it's really starting to bother me. any ideas on how to handle it? i've mentioned some small things to see if he would get the hint, and he seems completely oblivious. second, he completely disrespects me. he told me he didn't dance at his brothers wedding, and then 2 minutes later (literally, the same song) he was dancing with a girl "he's known forever and hasn't seen in a while to catch up". he befriends girls he cheated on me with years ago and thinks i'm being dramatic for not liking it, he hides stuff from me on his computer, and i guess has been for a while. his internet explorer was not working the other day and i offered to try to fix it (my mom is programmer and my dad also worked with computers) and he freaked out and paid to have his friend wipe it then got mad at me for being "nosy". he downtalks me in front of his friends. he has weird pictures on his phone (background) that are a bit too explicit for the likes of YA, but you know what i mean. if we argue he just walks out or hangs up. if we're not around each other (he's in the military) he just ignores me til he comes home. lastly, if i try to talk to him about anything, he dismisses it. apologizes, says things will be better, and basically it's in one ear out the other. and i'm the only one that tries to talk. it's confusing because he's the one that wanted to get married. not that i didn't, but he pushed it when i wanted to wait a little bit. i don't know. and that's just tip of the iceberg. i know there's two sides to every story and i'm not perfect, but i always respect him and at least attempt to treat him the way i would wanna be treated. also, i know we're both relatively young (early twenties) but we've been together for more than 5 years. i don't know. i'm just out of ideas. sorry again about the rambling, any advice? i'm trying to rationalize with myself and tell myself it's hormones, but a lot of this (and things like it) has been going on since before i was pregnant as well.

Public Comments

1. It is your hormones. You don't make changes or upset anything while you are pregnant and then 6 weeks after the baby is born. You need to calm down.
2. well he is being didrespectful and you or any body needs to put up with crap like that, you need a man and your baby need a real man for a dad. good luck
3. First off, don't be sorry. You aren't rambling at all! As a mother of five, I know just how impossible it can be to be pregnant and deal with a toddler.You are lucky to even get a shower! And housework? Forget it! (And I'm a major clean freak!) I remember when my two oldest kids (girls, 18 months apart) were babies, 18 months and newborn. One would start crying, then the other one at the same time. So of course I cried too! My then husband did not help with ANYTHING. I was 23 when I finally had to leave. He was always out with his buddies, or they were always at our house. Not to mention all the ladies who (like me at first) were so charmed by him.Pregnant women seem to be in tune with things they did not notice so much before.. It's intuition. You are going by instinct, and that instinct wants to see to it that the world is a safe and loving place for you and your baby. And his is to AVOID the coming reality- his boyhood times are over. He may resent the situation, and want to escape in any way mentally possible (computer). Just do what I did- make the living room "surface clean" (I even shoved dirty dishes under the sink to hide them!) Slap on a ton of makeup, take your hair down. And DONT act as if he should notice.And act sneaky about your computer stuff as well, so he wonders..Go to some hot guy site so he can find it on the history button! It can say"Hello, Sexymom300!Welcome back!" Haha. PS. . Both my girls grew up, they are 23 and 24. And they both married Marines. And those boys kiss thier asses! So not all military guys are clueless. Train him... Good luck sweetie! Don't give up on him yet. He's just scared of being what he thought he wanted.
4. It sounds like he doesn't want to be married anymore. He is hiding internet activity, reconnecting with ex-lovers, it sounds like there is something going on - pregnant or not.
5. I thought it might be your hormones too until I kept reading. I wouldn't tell you to leave your husband, but I agree with what Missy said...busy yourself with other stuff and sort of ignore him..that way you are more focused on what you have to do, instead of him and his actions and antics.