My Funny Picture

I met the man of my life, but how can i get him to meet up again?

Then he replied briefly said, maybe it was my Chinese humour and he was German, and he couldn’t enjoy the fun in that message. He said, he didn’t like the behavior and style. I sent back an email telling him that I felt sorry about my few emails to him. I said I had been trying to distant myself from my feelings about him. I said he had been on my mind often and I for the first time felt it was something quite new to me. (it was true that I have never felt so much about a person like him before). I said I had been behave in a way I myself also felt strange and a bit uneasy too. And I felt my emails might have disturbed him and troubled him which I would never wanted in a way. So I have decided to cool down and get back to my own self and find out what is happening to me and what I really wanted. Then I said I wished him to take good care of himself, not working too hard, taking good of his stomach( I noticed he was quite particular about food but he still missed his meal here and there), and safe driving ( I felt he was a bit careless when he was driving sometimes). And wished him a happy new year ahead. After two days in New year day 2, he replied me with an email as following: Thank you very much for your E-mails and also for your honest replies. I feel a bit guilt, that I was very reserved to you during the last weeks and reacted in case of your sms on Sunday quiet harsh and even unfair. This made me sad, because I find that you are a very kind and charming person, who I enjoyed meeting, but who tries to push me into her life without understanding that I withdraw more and more with each attempt. Sorry, I did not know anymore, how to prevent you from sending me many, extremely long E-mails, which were so well written in perfect English but just telling me “funny" stories about our innocent friendship and praising and making me compliments so many times. Never ever in my life, somebody said so often without any reason “sorry” and “excuse” to me. This let me feel very uneasy and scared me off. After your last E-mail, I feel much better, because now, your behavior and writing is not as contradicting anymore and I don't feel like somebody wants to trapp me in. I didn’t want to reply, I was almost in tears when I read it, I felt we actually both were understanding to each other, both very kind person, but it has been so difficult to get both connected like this, and this was so precious, I was happier than sad, I was sad because I felt pain when I read that he had been sad… I didn’t want him to be unhappy and troubled. I didn’t reply because I felt I could only say, “thank you for your reply and understanding, I understand. “But I didn’t think that would be a proper email, so the following day I replied something like this-- Sorry I was not able to reply your email yesterday as I was getting my punishment --needed to prepare presentation for today's class, and I couldn't get the PDF995 working...anyway, from now on, my passion for writing about daily life, little things, people, and places will be mostly shifted to boring essay, report and paper writings...in order to survive, I am thinking of picking up drawing cartoons... Thank you very much for your email and sharing. I guess I can understand...I have been feeling bad about myself these days. As for the Sunday sms, it was a fun and joking sms, but it was not appropriate to be sent to you, I should have expected the misunderstanding, and to top it off, I commented you were oversensitive...Is there anyway I can take back those words? Too late? I have been thinking about a best way to punish myself, such as eat four meals a day instead of 3 meals, no smile at all for one day...not easy to find one..what could you suggest? He didn’t reply. After few days, I tried to start chat as if nothing happened before. And we had a few times very pleasant chat last week about religion, culture, history and jokes. It was very nice feelings. Saturday evening on the chat he even told me he was checking houses whole day with property agent, he wanted to buy a house. All went quite happily, but evening, I sent him an sms asked if he was free to meet up for a drink. He said he was on his way with friends to a party. The following day I saw the party picture on his friend’s party where he brought a girl as partner to the party. It was almost the same group of friends he brought me to the party before. I felt a bit sad but I was thinking maybe I shouldn’t disturb him any more since he has been seeing new girl.

Public Comments

1. Wow Grace this is really long...but glad to say I read it all...it seems that you're just friends...and you need to give him space no matter how much you want to talk to him...if he wants to meet up again then he will make the effort...it's a really sad story...just keep your head up...yo'll find someone even better....
2. say your a nymphomaniac works everytime
3. I think you're not made for each other, he made it clear that he doesn't want to be any closer to you than just being friends. And you really should stop telling him you're punishing yourself for what you did to him, it sounds scary...If it was a joke, I didn't get it, sorry.