My Funny Picture - Is this too weird? Cat died11 years ago. I still grieve.?

Is this too weird? Cat died11 years ago. I still grieve.?

Had a cat that was super special to me, still think about her & still get a deep sinking depressed feeling. The vet had misdiagnosed a rare disease when she was barely 2 years old. I nursed her, saw her get sicker and saw her die. Since then many people I've know have died. My grief for them is hardly noticible compared to the pain of thinking about that innocent cat. I still want revenge on that vet, who also treated me as an "overconcerned mother" when I brought her in. I know about "think about the good times", etc. Doesn't help: it leads to thinking about the death. Wish I could believe in an afterlife. I do have a full life, so I don't sit around thinking stuff up. I have a box of her pictures, favorite toys, baby teeth, which I still can't bear to look at - too painful. Any help appreciated. Thanks. Please Vote Wow so many considerate answers that have helped so much. Thank you! Thank you! I'm on a new road. I'm going to leave this open to voting.

Public Comments

not weird if it's special to you . dont think too much though
yes, it is weird.
Your not weird at all, most people have that one special something in their life that they will never let go of. Don't let anyone tell you your weird cuz your being human.
thats not weird i had a dog that we got before i was born and it died like 5 years ago and i still think of him and get very sad thinking of him but no offence not trying to be rude that just a little weird having its toys and stuff lol its ok pics tho but its toys??? lol
My cat also died, it is normal to grieve about that, for most people, a pet is like a best friend or like a child. Just accept it that she/he isn't physically with you anymore. You can try talking to here/him before going to sleep. You ùight want to take another cat (if you haven't done so), but avoid giving here the same name. This is all advice i could give, I hope it helped.
Forget revenge and all that. It will only make YOU feel worse. Its okay to grieve your cat. She meant a lot to you. Just grieve, feel sad, miss her. That's all.
No, this is not weird. Well my dog died 3 years ago and he was just a pup cause he ate something poisonous and started foaming at the mouth. We didn't get him to the vet in time. The vet told us that if we did bring him earlier, there was a chance of saving him. It's okay you know, it's really naturally to feel that deep,sinking feeling. Of course, yours has been already 11 years, but whats that compared to some one who grieves for a loved one they lost, probably many more years ago... as compared to 11 years ago. So it's not weird. It's something you loved very dearly. Well, have you heard of the Rainbow Bridge? If you haven't, search it on Google. It helped me get over my puppy when I read through it. Nevermind, here is the link. http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm Do cheer up! All things come and go.
its not weird at all, i think its really important that you embrace this grief, dont try to push it aside cause you think its silly cause its not!! try not to think of your cat as 'gone' but instead just in a different place (hopefully in a happy place), when you do daily activities eg washing, cooking dinner etc talk to it like its still there, tell it what you did in your day etc, this way you'll still feel connected like he/she is still there with you. as for the vet, its natural your still angry but i guess you have to move on from that theres nothing you can do anymore and bitterness isnt going to help with your grieving process. im so sorry for your loss, good luck with your grieving and i promise though you will never forget, eventually the days will get easier :)
I dont think its werid. My cat to me is like my baby. I care about him & treat him like he's my kid. A lot of people feel like that towards their pets. Its like they are a person and part of the family. My mom died in September & how I tried to not think about it was I tried to keep myself busy. It was hard to deal with & still is but trying to keep yourself occupied works. Try to think about the positives in your life. Hope you feel better =)
In 2004 i had a dream during that time frame of kinda waking up ("half-asleep"). I had moved about 2 months earlier prior to this dream, but owned 3 cats back where my father was living (230 miles away). Anyway in this dream/vision, I saw my cat whome I was missing dearly. I saw her as if she were lying next to me up at my neck like she always did. I even woke up talking to her, and could feel her fur and everything. Then realized she wasn't there of course, but it was so very real. Later that day before I went to work I looked over at her picture, held it, and cried because I was just missing her. No big deal... When I got home from work that night, my father called me and said, " Sheba (cats name) is deathly i'll and can't even move, what do you wan't to do?" I told him to put her down and I was devastated. But was at ease because of the dream I had. I had felt that she was visiting me one last time, even though i was far away. (thats one of my posts about dreams, but i didnt want to ask you to go read it.. im just sharing my story) :) it's okay to keep grieving, i cry when i think about my past furry family members
You mention that many people you know have died. You many be experiencing what professionals might call transference. You may miss the cat, and put all of your grieving onto the cat, but perhaps that is because there are other losses that are harder to face? There are many routes you could go with this. One would be to get rid of the box. Do it in a ceremonial way, to give yourself some closure. You could bury it, send it out to sea, whatever is most meaningful to you. Or, you could try exposure- take some time to look through the box and honor your precious kitty's memory. Any way you handle it is OK, but it seems like you are at a place where you are ready to start healing.
sounds like u took the cat on as ur own child and ur grienving over ur own child...i had a cat since i was a toddler and it died when i was a junior in highschool...i think about her and miss her and grieve a little still but not much at all n e more since its been about 5 almost 6 years...the vet also did something wrong... they gave too much of the enima or how ever u spell it, to her for her slight constipation and it ended in liver faliure so we put her down...i still have a bit of resentment for not having them recheck and lower the dosage because she was a senior and we all know sometimes senior animals cant take a lot of stuff and need a bit more care but ya know sometimes things happen...just because ur a doctor doesnt mean ur god and u know exactly what is happening to everything...even doctors make a guess...even tho its a well educated one...still all sorts of doctors only do what they can to the best of their knowledge. u cant blame them for not knowing every disease and every medical problem on the earth. after all they are only human..
The grieving period for every person is different. In instances where the departure is under unique circumstances, it can be understandable for a less conventional grieving period to happen. I find it interesting to note that you mentioned the death of other people since the death of your cat. It brings to light that your concern over is over "mortality" and that the image or items that allow you to recall your cat is, in actuality, bringing to light the sadness over the loss of ALL of your loved ones - and not simply of your cat, as you think. When you say you ponder about the afterlife, it's an indication that you are very aware of your mortality and perhaps unconsciously, it frightens you or saddens you. The death of your cat is certainly the stimulant for this line of thought. It may be best for you to set aside time and finally go through the items of your cat, relish the memories, and allow yourself to have closure of its death. Just like any hardship, you must face it head on. Prolonging its resolution only makes things far more difficult and complicated in the end. By doing this, by allowing yourself to have closure, perhaps you can make room in your life for love of something else. Perhaps, even, another cat.
It's too painful to lose a cat :( for me i have lost one a year ago and i was very sad after losing her but then i though that the only way to overcome my grieve is to buy another one so i bought a new kitten i still remember the first one of course and feel sad when i look at her pictures but the new one full filed my life
Hi Susa, it's an old badinage but, in this case, I really do know how you feel. When one of my daughters was taken away (just over four years ago now) after the shock had worn off, I cried most every day too for a year. This reminds me, however, of what it is I am missing - her brightness, her inventiveness, her openness, everything that made her so wonderful. So the tears now bring a smile to my face (I'm crying as I write this) as I remember how wonderful she is and my heart expands in thankfulness and love. Remembering her in this way makes it certain that we shall meet again; perhaps she will come through my new wife. All that I am certain of is that we will know each other again instantly. All I can give you is the certainty that if you remember her with thankfulness then she will return to you. Re-incarnation is very real and very easy to prove if you approach it with an open mind. Blessed be. Karma Singh
its a little odd but not weird. i love my dogs very much
I'm so sorry for your loss and no, what you're feeling is not weird at all. You're still grieving over your beloved cat and that's completely normal and expected. My own cat Caleb was like a son to me and I miss him terribly and still think of him everyday. After all, we look after our pets, bond with them, give them a name, feed them everyday, nurture them, love them, watch over them, buy them toys and treats, take them to the pet doctor when they're sick, sometimes even to the grooming salon (the equivalent to the hairdresser) - just like we would do for our own children. The only difference? We don't have to worry about their education, take them to the playground or to the amusement park - right? You claim that you have a full life. Let's just hope that you're not simply referring to a busy career at the office yet an empty home with no husband and no kids! I wish you all the very best and try and keep your chin up! Take care!