My Funny Picture

you know those funny teachers posters like of an animal scratching its head going like wjhat homework? well i need one of a cat with its head cocked and asking test what test?! thnx = )

List of ideas on stuff to draw to hang up in my room? I recently took down some old cat posters from like 5th grade. well im 13 now and i don't have much teenage posters im going shopping in a while but i need ideas! i can describe me if needed. Im skinny,blonde hair,random,funny,and have a lot of good friends. I need idea's like maybe nicknames? My full name is Haleigh Morgan Hobbs. I have one with my initials and my boyfriends initials but i cant think of anything else

What are some funny ways to decorate my co-worker's office? She's been gone all week for a funeral.? One time we filled someone's office with balloons when she was on vacation in Hawaii. Another time some friends put a bunch of dolphin posters and figurines around the desk of a co-worker on his birthday. What should we do this time? One guy had a coffin left over from Halloween, but his cat has been sleeping in it, and I don’t want him to bring it in because a couple of people are allergic to cats and I don’t want to cause them discomfort.

Response to 10 things...dead cat. It is not sick,.it is a comic poster for my friends dad, sorry? My friends dad was a micro biologist and didn't like cats it was a comic poster he had on his door at the mayo clinic. He has just passed away and she is looking for the poster. It isn't sick it is funny. I love cats but it was hillarious. Sorry if the title has offended anyone

Around midnight when I'm asleep, my cat climbs and pushes everything off my desk? On school nights, regular nights, when I have friends over... My big black cat waits till the whole house is asleep and goes into my room (maybe because it's my cat?) and climbs to my desk and tears papers, pushes cd's to the floor, jumps to pull down posters (maybe a lot of cats to that part) but there's no end to it! I've tried shutting my door at night but that's worse because it scratches and moans till it's open again. I told my parents but they think it's funny. I love my kitty soooooo much!!!!!!!!!! :) but I just need to sleep sometimes. What should I do?

Why does my cat do this? I have a huge stand up Superman poster on my wall and she always go near it and makes funny noises and Sits and Stares at it for a long time! and she does this like everyday!!! Is she in love or somthing? lol Umm I don't think she is disturbed by it, Because she tries to reach for the poster with her paws on the wall!

funny pictures, I need a laugh? can anyone give me a site with funny pictures? if it's family friendly it's usually not funny, lol. sort of like these: http://www.geekweek.com/2010/02/friday-frodos.html NO CATS. NO ICANHAZCHEEZBURGER SITES, PLEASE. I'm sick of searching for funny pictures and getting stupid cats and "fails" and demotivational posters. I've actually already seen funnyjunk, lol

Alright, its about DEMOTIVATIONAL Posters?? Suggestions, please? Hello! Okay, so I like to make my own demotivational posters. I like to use my own pictures, my own sayings, etc. But, I'm stumped. http://360.yahoo.com/profile-3tdgaFgieq_pzsEUNrPVAoClEOg- The picture of the cat is Gilbert. I'd like to have something funny written under it, but I'm not sure what... Any suggestions? Nothing too weird please, but funny is welcome. Thanks

what are those things with the picture and the funny saying under it? like this http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/0806/ash-ketchum-may-ash-misty-pokemon-celebrity-sports-mma-cats-demotivational-poster-1213310615.jpg

I think my cat has a problem?? I don't know how it got to this point.... http://360.yahoo.com/profile-3tdgaFgieq_pzsEUNrPVAoClEOg- lol. Btw, if you know what a Demotivational poster is, any suggestions on what I could write on the bottom of the photo? Something funny please... LOL. Adopt an animal today: That beer was photoshopped in. haha. XD For some reason Gilbert (the cat) always makes those faces. And he always looks drunk. (I'm not giving him anything, I promise.

Does Jerry Lawler need more funny one-liners for RAW? Here are some from Rodney Dangerfield, but I guess he already read them! My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive. My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light. My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was. On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. One year they asked me to be poster boy - for birth control. Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest. This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me. We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together. What a dog I got, his favorite bone is in my arm. What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them. When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother. With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we'll never see each other! With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me. Yeah, I know I'm ugly... I said to a bartender, 'Make me a zombie.' He said 'God beat me to it.' Rodney Dangerfield

Can someone please help me with the name of this website? I think it starts with a "b" and a man writes articles about his day and certain situations like one of his latest was he had to help a lady create a poster for a missing cat and he kept making really funny ones, and another where his friend simon needed pie graphs and a logo for his work and another i can remember where he has this big fight with this christian lady over a school play his child has to attend. i know its not much but if someone could tell me i'd be very appreciative :D i really wanna read it. thanks !

HEEEEEEEEEEELP ME PLEEEASEE!? I have this uncontrollable 'disorder'. Whenever I see a cat I always dribble and I dont mean to. Like the other day I was in Morrisons and there was this poster of a cat and I just stood there dribbling and then everyone was staring at me and it was soo embarassing. There was a puddle beneath my feet where all the dribble landed, and I finally stopped when someone removed the poster.I just ran out crying becos there were lots of people. I dnt know what to do. It all started when I was 5 and I used to dribble for fun becos I found it funny and my brother used to be grossed out abot it but now he just thinks im weired and my family dont go out with me becos of this problem. Please i need to do something about it

How do you like my script?!? yes it is long, but i really need to know? im turning it in 2morrow for english class. its a horror/thriller. if filmed it'd be about 8 minutes long. “The Good Children” by Ashley Eggen and Kayleen Thompson 12/15/08 EXT. FRONT YARD-NOON There are several missing pet posters on a telephone pole. A neighbor is posting a new one for a missing cat. DANNY and KAYLA are playing a hand game in the yard. DANNY AND KAYLA (together) ,, Three four slam the door, five six get your sticks Seven eight…. INT. HOUSE- LAUNDRY ROOM- NOON JOHN is doing the children’s laundry. He holds up a BOY’S SHIRT and looks at it. There is blood spatter on it. He puts BOY’S SHIRT in the washer. Looks grim and confused. OPENING CREDITS INT-HOUSE- KITCHEN-MORNING JOHN and MIKE are drinking coffee and discussing DANNY and KAYLA. The children’s lunches are on the table and ready for school. MIKE (hushed tone) You know what john; I really don’t think its anything to worry about. You know my old man gave me a Red Ryder BB gun when I was five years old. Gave me a dollar for every bird I shot. (laughing) gave me five for when I hit that damn neighbors cat. JOHN (worry in his voice) I know but, I mean, it’s the way they did it. All secretive. Like they knew it was wrong. And they still haven’t said anything about it.. MIKE Come on, there like nine years old. You’re overreacting here. JOHN Yeah but mike, you saw all those posters out there. Don’t you think its funny how all those pets are missing?! I don’t know how to talk to them, or if I should or… DANNY and KAYLA come running down the stairs interrupting the conversation. enter into the kitchen. From all appearances they are happy and normal children. MIKE (quickly before the children fully enter) Its just a phase. They’ll be fine JOHN gives him a quick hopeful looks, though doesn’t seem sure. DANNY and KAYLA Good Morning daddy! (less enthusiastically) uncle mike. MIKE Morning kids! JOHN You guys all ready for school? KAYLA Yep. All ready daddy JOHN Ok. Your lunches are on the table. Hurry up now, your gonna miss the bus. DANNY and KAYLA take there lunches and head towards the door. JOHN (as they leave) And Danny, tuck your shirt in! The children exit JOHN (Shaking his head) Its eery, you know? I mean its like it doesn’t even affect them. MIKE Like I said. It’s just a phase. Don’t worry about it. MIKE gives JOHN a slap on the back and finishes off his coffee. JOHN looks conflicted as he stares into his mug. EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD-SIDEWALK- MORNING DANNY and KAYLA are walking to the bus stop at the end of their street. They are KAYLA is skipping and talking excitedly to her brother. KAYLA wasn’t that great Danny? daddy doesn’t even care! (getting a scolding/slightly threatening tone) but that was awfully stupid of you to put your shirt in the wash Danny. DANNY looks down ashamed KAYLA (Patronizing,) Oh its ok, Danny. Don’t feel bad. Its not like it was your fault that you were so careless. (laughs) DANNY Kayla, I think we should tell.. I mean I don’t think it’s a good idea if we.. KAYLA whips around and Glares at DANNY. Her face changes and she adopts the voice and demeanor of an innocent little girl KAYLA Well if you really want daddy to know all those terrible things you did to those poor little animals… he’s going to be sooo angry that he raised a son who would think of such awful things! DANNY (Very angry) SHUT UP KAYLA! You know full well that it was your idea! I didn’t even wanted to do it but YOU made me. KAYLA And how is he going to believe, Danny? DANNY opens his mouth to respond, but stays quiet. He looks defeated. KAYLA smirks at him. And skips ahead. KAYLA (Sounds sweet and normal) Come on Danny, we’re going to miss the bus! DANNY runs to catch up to her; they laugh and continue on like nothing happened. INT. OFFICE BUILDING-DAY JOHN is at work while the children are at school. He can’t focus on his job because he is worried about DANNY AND KAYLA. He is visibly distressed. WORKER Hey, you ok man? You don’t look so good. JOHN What? Oh uh nothing I just got a lot on my mind right now.. JOHN files some papers and does other work related things. Later he is back at his desk and Googles “violence in children” It says its nothing to worry about its simply a way for young children to express their feelings. JOHN gives a sigh of relief and goes back to work. EXT. Neighborhood- Afternoon DANNY AND KAYLA are walking home from school discussing the day. A neighbor is out watering her lawn. DANNY Hey, did you see that Mrs. Watterson just got a new dog? KAYLA Oh yeah? DANNY Yeah it seemed pretty friendly KAYLA Hm.. Maybe we should go play with it, don’t you think Danny? KAYLA gives Danny a mischievous look and skips off. Danny stops for a moment and is conflicted. He runs ahead to join his sister. EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD-FOL EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD-FOLLOWING DAY MR. WATTERSON is hanging a LOST DOG FLYER for his new dog. JOHN is watching him through his window and shaking his head. INT. HOUSE-KITCHEN-DAY JOHN walks away from the window and looks worried. He hears the children laughing and coming down the stairs and looks even more worried. DANNY AND KAYLA come into the kitchen laughing. JOHN (uneasy, but trying to sound upbeat) Soooo, what did you kids do after school yesterday? JOHN’S Smile fades as he looks at his children. KAYLA beams at him while DANNY looks about guiltily. KAYLA Oh, nothing much. We went and played with Mr. Watterson’s new dog DANNY’S eyes widen with panic and he looks quickly at his sister. JOHN is visibly alarmed, but tries to stay composed. JOHN OK. That’s ok…um..so…you were the… uh, Well. You..? (john sighs and gives up what he was trying to say) so what did you play? DANNY Nothing! We didn’t play nothing, dad. honest! DANNY attempts a smile. KAYLA looks over at DANNY. There is an evil glint in her eye and she is smirking. KAYLA (Very sweetly) silly Danny, we played all sorts of games, remember? It got all over your shoe. KAYLA turns away from DANNY and is now grinning at JOHN. JOHN looks at KAYLA, horrified. KAYLA’S smile disappears off her face. KAYLA (sad, slightly confused) Whats the matter, Daddy? Why are you looking at me like that? (gets increasingly frantic) Daddy? DADDY! Whats the matter?! JOHN backs up against the counter as KAYLA steps closer. JOHN (yelling and panicky) What? Wha..Kayla! what have you done? Do you know what you did?! JOHN grabs KAYLA’s arm and is shaking her. DANNY is seen in the background crying. KAYLA (crying) Daddy! I was just having some fun daddy! Don’t you love me anymore?! JOHN doesn’t respond and looks at her disgusted. KAYLA (screaming) DADDY! DADDY! JOHN starts to walk away. KAYLA is now angry and no longer crying. Her tone gets harsher and DANNY stops crying and glances quickly at JOHN with fear in fear in his eyes. JOHN Doesn’t notice the change in KAYLA. KAYLA DADDY! DADDY, LOOK AT ME!! (her voice gets harsher and more demanding) I SAID LOOK AT ME! (Screaming) LOOK AT ME! JOHN Glances back in time to see that KAYLA is standing behind him with a KITCHEN KNIFE in hand. Her features are contorted and she lunges at JOHN. DANNY throws himself to the floor and hides his face as KAYLA passes him. JOHN turns around to run, but KAYLA has the KNIFE in his back before he can take three steps. JOHN falls to the ground, dead. DANNY is to shocked to continue crying. He sits up and stares at JOHN and then at KAYLA. KAYLA wipes the back of her hand across her forehead. She is holding the KNIFE still. streak of blood smears across her forehead. She smiles maliciously at DANNY, who looks back at her with horror. KAYLA (sounded sweet, but also dangerous) Come on Danny. Lets play. KAYLA makes a quick move towards DANNY as he fumbles backward, Frightened. DANNY is still on the floor and KAYLA’s back blocks the shot as she moves further into frame. CREDITS

is my script any good? yes it is long, but i really need to know? im turning it in 2morrow for english class. its a horror/thriller. if filmed it'd be about 8 minutes long. “The Good Children” by Ashley Eggen and Kayleen Thompson 12/15/08 EXT. FRONT YARD-NOON There are several missing pet posters on a telephone pole. A neighbor is posting a new one for a missing cat. DANNY and KAYLA are playing a hand game in the yard. DANNY AND KAYLA (together) ,, Three four slam the door, five six get your sticks Seven eight…. INT. HOUSE- LAUNDRY ROOM- NOON JOHN is doing the children’s laundry. He holds up a BOY’S SHIRT and looks at it. There is blood spatter on it. He puts BOY’S SHIRT in the washer. Looks grim and confused. OPENING CREDITS INT-HOUSE- KITCHEN-MORNING JOHN and MIKE are drinking coffee and discussing DANNY and KAYLA. The children’s lunches are on the table and ready for school. MIKE (hushed tone) You know what john; I really don’t think its anything to worry about. You know my old man gave me a Red Ryder BB gun when I was five years old. Gave me a dollar for every bird I shot. (laughing) gave me five for when I hit that damn neighbors cat. JOHN (worry in his voice) I know but, I mean, it’s the way they did it. All secretive. Like they knew it was wrong. And they still haven’t said anything about it.. MIKE Come on, there like nine years old. You’re overreacting here. JOHN Yeah but mike, you saw all those posters out there. Don’t you think its funny how all those pets are missing?! I don’t know how to talk to them, or if I should or… DANNY and KAYLA come running down the stairs interrupting the conversation. enter into the kitchen. From all appearances they are happy and normal children. MIKE (quickly before the children fully enter) Its just a phase. They’ll be fine JOHN gives him a quick hopeful looks, though doesn’t seem sure. DANNY and KAYLA Good Morning daddy! (less enthusiastically) uncle mike. MIKE Morning kids! JOHN You guys all ready for school? KAYLA Yep. All ready daddy JOHN Ok. Your lunches are on the table. Hurry up now, your gonna miss the bus. DANNY and KAYLA take there lunches and head towards the door. JOHN (as they leave) And Danny, tuck your shirt in! The children exit JOHN (Shaking his head) Its eery, you know? I mean its like it doesn’t even affect them. MIKE Like I said. It’s just a phase. Don’t worry about it. MIKE gives JOHN a slap on the back and finishes off his coffee. JOHN looks conflicted as he stares into his mug. EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD-SIDEWALK- MORNING DANNY and KAYLA are walking to the bus stop at the end of their street. They are KAYLA is skipping and talking excitedly to her brother. KAYLA wasn’t that great Danny? daddy doesn’t even care! (getting a scolding/slightly threatening tone) but that was awfully stupid of you to put your shirt in the wash Danny. DANNY looks down ashamed KAYLA (Patronizing,) Oh its ok, Danny. Don’t feel bad. Its not like it was your fault that you were so careless. (laughs) DANNY Kayla, I think we should tell.. I mean I don’t think it’s a good idea if we.. KAYLA whips around and Glares at DANNY. Her face changes and she adopts the voice and demeanor of an innocent little girl KAYLA Well if you really want daddy to know all those terrible things you did to those poor little animals… he’s going to be sooo angry that he raised a son who would think of such awful things! DANNY (Very angry) SHUT UP KAYLA! You know full well that it was your idea! I didn’t even wanted to do it but YOU made me. KAYLA And how is he going to believe, Danny? DANNY opens his mouth to respond, but stays quiet. He looks defeated. KAYLA smirks at him. And skips ahead. KAYLA (Sounds sweet and normal) Come on Danny, we’re going to miss the bus! DANNY runs to catch up to her; they laugh and continue on like nothing happened. INT. OFFICE BUILDING-DAY JOHN is at work while the children are at school. He can’t focus on his job because he is worried about DANNY AND KAYLA. He is visibly distressed. WORKER Hey, you ok man? You don’t look so good. JOHN What? Oh uh nothing I just got a lot on my mind right now.. JOHN files some papers and does other work related things. Later he is back at his desk and Googles “violence in children” It says its nothing to worry about its simply a way for young children to express their feelings. JOHN gives a sigh of relief and goes back to work. EXT. Neighborhood- Afternoon DANNY AND KAYLA are walking home from school discussing the day. A neighbor is out watering her lawn. DANNY Hey, did you see that Mrs. Watterson just got a new dog? KAYLA Oh yeah? DANNY Yeah it seemed pretty friendly KAYLA Hm.. Maybe we should go play with it, don’t you think Danny? KAYLA gives Danny a mischievous look and skips off. Danny stops for a moment and is conflicted. He runs ahead to join his sister. EXT. NEIGHBO EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD-FOLLOWING DAY MR. WATTERSON is hanging a LOST DOG FLYER for his new dog. JOHN is watching him through his window and shaking his head. INT. HOUSE-KITCHEN-DAY JOHN walks away from the window and looks worried. He hears the children laughing and coming down the stairs and looks even more worried. DANNY AND KAYLA come into the kitchen laughing. JOHN (uneasy, but trying to sound upbeat) Soooo, what did you kids do after school yesterday? JOHN’S Smile fades as he looks at his children. KAYLA beams at him while DANNY looks about guiltily. KAYLA Oh, nothing much. We went and played with Mr. Watterson’s new dog DANNY’S eyes widen with panic and he looks quickly at his sister. JOHN is visibly alarmed, but tries to stay composed. JOHN OK. That’s ok…um..so…you were the… uh, Well. You..? (john sighs and gives up what he was trying to say) so what did you play? DANNY Nothing! We didn’t play nothing, dad. honest! DANNY attempts a smile. KAYLA looks over at DANNY. There is an evil glint in her eye and she is smirking. KAYLA (Very sweetly) silly Danny, we played all sorts of games, remember? It got all over your shoe. KAYLA turns away from DANNY and is now grinning at JOHN. JOHN looks at KAYLA, horrified. KAYLA’S smile disappears off her face. KAYLA (sad, slightly confused) Whats the matter, Daddy? Why are you looking at me like that? (gets increasingly frantic) Daddy? DADDY! Whats the matter?! JOHN backs up against the counter as KAYLA steps closer. JOHN (yelling and panicky) What? Wha..Kayla! what have you done? Do you know what you did?! JOHN grabs KAYLA’s arm and is shaking her. DANNY is seen in the background crying. KAYLA (crying) Daddy! I was just having some fun daddy! Don’t you love me anymore?! JOHN doesn’t respond and looks at her disgusted. KAYLA (screaming) DADDY! DADDY! JOHN starts to walk away. KAYLA is now angry and no longer crying. Her tone gets harsher and DANNY stops crying and glances quickly at JOHN with fear in fear in his eyes. JOHN Doesn’t notice the change in KAYLA. KAYLA DADDY! DADDY, LOOK AT ME!! (her voice gets harsher and more demanding) I SAID LOOK AT ME! (Screaming) LOOK AT ME! JOHN Glances back in time to see that KAYLA is standing behind him with a KITCHEN KNIFE in hand. Her features are contorted and she lunges at JOHN. DANNY throws himself to the floor and hides his face as KAYLA passes him. JOHN turns around to run, but KAYLA has the KNIFE in his back before he can take three steps. JOHN falls to the ground, dead. DANNY is to shocked to continue crying. He sits up and stares at JOHN and then at KAYLA. KAYLA wipes the back of her hand across her forehead. She is holding the KNIFE still. streak of blood smears across her forehead. She smiles maliciously at DANNY, who looks back at her with horror. KAYLA (sounded sweet, but also dangerous) Come on Danny. Lets play. KAYLA makes a quick move towards DANNY as he fumbles backward, Frightened DANNY is still on the floor and KAYLA’s back blocks the shot as she moves further into frame. CREDITS

SURVEY: How do you like my script? yes it is long, but i really need to know? im turning it in 2morrow for english class. its a horror/thriller. if filmed it'd be about 8 minutes long. “The Good Children” by Ashley Eggen and Kayleen Thompson 12/15/08 EXT. FRONT YARD-NOON There are several missing pet posters on a telephone pole. A neighbor is posting a new one for a missing cat. DANNY and KAYLA are playing a hand game in the yard. DANNY AND KAYLA (together) ,, Three four slam the door, five six get your sticks Seven eight…. INT. HOUSE- LAUNDRY ROOM- NOON JOHN is doing the children’s laundry. He holds up a BOY’S SHIRT and looks at it. There is blood spatter on it. He puts BOY’S SHIRT in the washer. Looks grim and confused. OPENING CREDITS INT-HOUSE- KITCHEN-MORNING JOHN and MIKE are drinking coffee and discussing DANNY and KAYLA. The children’s lunches are on the table and ready for school. MIKE (hushed tone) You know what john; I really don’t think its anything to worry about. You know my old man gave me a Red Ryder BB gun when I was five years old. Gave me a dollar for every bird I shot. (laughing) gave me five for when I hit that damn neighbors cat. JOHN (worry in his voice) I know but, I mean, it’s the way they did it. All secretive. Like they knew it was wrong. And they still haven’t said anything about it.. MIKE Come on, there like nine years old. You’re overreacting here. JOHN Yeah but mike, you saw all those posters out there. Don’t you think its funny how all those pets are missing?! I don’t know how to talk to them, or if I should or… DANNY and KAYLA come running down the stairs interrupting the conversation. enter into the kitchen. From all appearances they are happy and normal children. MIKE (quickly before the children fully enter) Its just a phase. They’ll be fine JOHN gives him a quick hopeful looks, though doesn’t seem sure. DANNY and KAYLA Good Morning daddy! (less enthusiastically) uncle mike. MIKE Morning kids! JOHN You guys all ready for school? KAYLA Yep. All ready daddy JOHN Ok. Your lunches are on the table. Hurry up now, your gonna miss the bus. DANNY and KAYLA take there lunches and head towards the door. JOHN (as they leave) And Danny, tuck your shirt in! The children exit JOHN (Shaking his head) Its eery, you know? I mean its like it doesn’t even affect them. MIKE Like I said. It’s just a phase. Don’t worry about it. MIKE gives JOHN a slap on the back and finishes off his coffee. JOHN looks conflicted as he stares into his mug. EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD-SIDEWALK- MORNING DANNY and KAYLA are walking to the bus stop at the end of their street. They are KAYLA is skipping and talking excitedly to her brother. KAYLA wasn’t that great Danny? daddy doesn’t even care! (getting a scolding/slightly threatening tone) but that was awfully stupid of you to put your shirt in the wash Danny. DANNY looks down ashamed KAYLA (Patronizing,) Oh its ok, Danny. Don’t feel bad. Its not like it was your fault that you were so careless. (laughs) DANNY Kayla, I think we should tell.. I mean I don’t think it’s a good idea if we.. KAYLA whips around and Glares at DANNY. Her face changes and she adopts the voice and demeanor of an innocent little girl KAYLA Well if you really want daddy to know all those terrible things you did to those poor little animals… he’s going to be sooo angry that he raised a son who would think of such awful things! DANNY (Very angry) SHUT UP KAYLA! You know full well that it was your idea! I didn’t even wanted to do it but YOU made me. KAYLA And how is he going to believe, Danny? DANNY opens his mouth to respond, but stays quiet. He looks defeated. KAYLA smirks at him. And skips ahead. KAYLA (Sounds sweet and normal) Come on Danny, we’re going to miss the bus! DANNY runs to catch up to her; they laugh and continue on like nothing happened. INT. OFFICE BUILDING-DAY JOHN is at work while the children are at school. He can’t focus on his job because he is worried about DANNY AND KAYLA. He is visibly distressed. WORKER Hey, you ok man? You don’t look so good. JOHN What? Oh uh nothing I just got a lot on my mind right now.. JOHN files some papers and does other work related things. Later he is back at his desk and Googles “violence in children” It says its nothing to worry about its simply a way for young children to express their feelings. JOHN gives a sigh of relief and goes back to work. EXT. Neighborhood- Afternoon DANNY AND KAYLA are walking home from school discussing the day. A neighbor is out watering her lawn. DANNY Hey, did you see that Mrs. Watterson just got a new dog? KAYLA Oh yeah? DANNY Yeah it seemed pretty friendly KAYLA Hm.. Maybe we should go play with it, don’t you think Danny? KAYLA gives Danny a mischievous look and skips off. Danny stops for a moment and is conflicted. He runs ahead to join his sister. EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD-FOL EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD-FOLLOWING DAY MR. WATTERSON is hanging a LOST DOG FLYER for his new dog. JOHN is watching him through his window and shaking his head. INT. HOUSE-KITCHEN-DAY JOHN walks away from the window and looks worried. He hears the children laughing and coming down the stairs and looks even more worried. DANNY AND KAYLA come into the kitchen laughing. JOHN (uneasy, but trying to sound upbeat) Soooo, what did you kids do after school yesterday? JOHN’S Smile fades as he looks at his children. KAYLA beams at him while DANNY looks about guiltily. KAYLA Oh, nothing much. We went and played with Mr. Watterson’s new dog DANNY’S eyes widen with panic and he looks quickly at his sister. JOHN is visibly alarmed, but tries to stay composed. JOHN OK. That’s ok…um..so…you were the… uh, Well. You..? (john sighs and gives up what he was trying to say) so what did you play? DANNY Nothing! We didn’t play nothing, dad. honest! DANNY attempts a smile. KAYLA looks over at DANNY. Ther There is an evil glint in her eye and she is smirking. KAYLA (Very sweetly) silly Danny, we played all sorts of games, remember? It got all over your shoe. KAYLA turns away from DANNY and is now grinning at JOHN. JOHN looks at KAYLA, horrified. KAYLA’S smile disappears off her face. KAYLA (sad, slightly confused) Whats the matter, Daddy? Why are you looking at me like that? (gets increasingly frantic) Daddy? DADDY! Whats the matter?! JOHN backs up against the counter as KAYLA steps closer. JOHN (yelling and panicky) What? Wha..Kayla! what have you done? Do you know what you did?! JOHN grabs KAYLA’s arm and is shaking her. DANNY is seen in the background crying. KAYLA (crying) Daddy! I was just having some fun daddy! Don’t you love me anymore?! JOHN doesn’t respond and looks at her disgusted. KAYLA (screaming) DADDY! DADDY! JOHN starts to walk away. KAYLA is now angry and no longer crying. Her tone gets harsher and DANNY stops crying and glances quickly at JOHN with fear in his eyes. JOHN Doesn’t notice the change in KAYLA. KAYLA DADDY! DADDY, LOOK AT ME!! (her voice gets harsher and more demanding) I SAID LOOK AT ME! (Screaming) LOOK AT ME! JOHN Glances back in time to see that KAYLA is standing behind him with a KITCHEN KNIFE in hand. Her features are contorted and she lunges at JOHN. DANNY throws himself to the floor and hides his face as KAYLA passes him. JOHN turns around to run, but KAYLA has the KNIFE in his back before he can take three steps. JOHN falls to the ground, dead. DANNY is to shocked to continue crying. He sits up and stares at JOHN and then at KAYLA. KAYLA wipes the back of her hand across her forehead. She is holding the KNIFE still. streak of blood smears across her forehead. She smiles maliciously at DANNY, who looks back at her with horror. KAYLA (sounded sweet, but also dangerous) Come on Danny. Lets play. KAYLA makes a quick move towards DANNY as he fumbles backward, Frightened. DANNY is still on the floor and KAYLA’s back blocks the shot as she moves further into frame. CREDITS

why cant i stop crying? my cat was 2 and i never let her out she was an inside cat for the sole purpose cuz every cat i had always ran away.. but none of them were like her... i had her the longest i have ever had a cat. my husband got her for a gift for me. well last year christmas eve she got out and was missing for a while we searched and searched, put posters up all around all the neighbor hoods around my house went to the shelter and animal control and nothing... a week goes by nothing then on the ninth day i had about gave up.. but then i got a phone call in the after noon and they said we just saw ur poster and i think she has been living in there garage since christmas they called her christmas kitty.... i was soooooo happy i went and it was her i was exstatic.. anyways a moth went by and her belly was starting to get bigger and i thought oh no she got pregnant and so be it she was she had 2 little girls thats it cuz she was tiny thats why i named her Bits she always looked like a kitten i loved it... anyways she was a very curiouse kitty she talked alot greeted me at the door gave nose kisses deff. talked up a storm, when she was by herself downstairs she would meow all crazy diff meows it was so cute... well we went out of town one night and the weekend before this last one we asked the roomates to watch our dog and let her outside and they didnt they let her go to the bathroom all in the house, so this weekend we were only gonna stay out one night but i begged for my mother in law to go take care of the dogs and she did so we got to stay. the roomates were at a wedding that night and had company over for a minute, with all this camotion my Bits got out again.... the following morning at 9 my roomate calls me i was sleeping i woke up at 10 and listened to my message and she was histerical....... said that she had found Bits........ and she was dead.... someone hit her by a car and just left her there... how can someone do that, how can someone hit a pet and not even care... its not a fast road eather its a neighbor hood ur supose to go slow in neighbor hoods how can some not see her...... im so upset, i cant stop crying i keep thinking about her and thinking about her all the fun times all the loves she gave me all the funny things she has done and i just cry more and more i cant stop. and her kittens miss her. we kept them and yes they are wheened they have been for a while... but u can tell there like wheres mommy, i just miss her so much and she was only 2. i just dont know what to do and how to stop crying i am so depressed it doesnt feel like its ever gonna get better....

Can someone critique this writing? You’re repulsive in so many ways. Maybe it’s because you’re a vegetarian. You are what you eat: green. Alien. I wanted to laugh the day you wore those sneakers to school. What circus did you get them from? Their goofiness was as subtle as Simon Cowell’s attitude, since you like that American Idol so much. I can’t believe you like that reality show enough to spend every Tuesday watching it. I bet if you paid attention to your homework as much as you do that show you’d be considered a genius, but then again, only those with the maturity of a toddler would think of you as such. Funny you consider yourself a genius. Your lips - the way you pout them - you’re not Angelina Jolie. Even if you were, it still looks weird. I think as of you as a fish, but I haven’t had the guilty pleasure of hooking you and cooking you and selling you to local restaurants for a price. You’d probably give them mercury poisoning. If not, they’d die from your smell; the way it suffocated me when we had gym together. That was even after you wearing deodorant. I saw the kind was “Christmas Tree,” but only rotted Christmas Trees with cat piss could smell like that. It fits, though. You seem very capable of owning many cats. I bet you sacrifice them. I love that you give advice. I figure the best thing I can do in life is ignore it. The sole purpose of your existence is to remind me and the rest of the world how to not live our lives. Anyway, being on the same planet as you has made me want to call up Balloon Boy’s Dad. Maybe he could especially craft a balloon sent to space for me. I’d love to pull an “Up.” Swine flu, cancer, hearing about John and Kate, root canals, the idea of Mcdonalds every night for dinner, Phyics homework, being alone, your odor, and experiencing this all together during what is to be the best day of my life couldn’t make me throw up as fast as the mere mentioning of your name. You were the one that was friends with them that night that taught me what “betrayal” and “backstabbing” were. Even worse is seeing photographs with smiles that radiated for miles and thinking you guys weren’t thinking: about me, about them, or anyone else that’d be bothered by it months after it occurred. You like rock music? So? Rock music is trash; ignore all the CDs I have. What about that movie you love? Oh, I wouldn’t know anything of it, even if I have posters of it. Photography? Ha, such a waste of time. I just spent $500 on that camera to make fun of it. Not because I like it. You're joining that club? I hope you have fun because I'm leaving. I saw you in the hallways today. For some strange reason, you waved at me. It must have been you secretly putting a hex on me. To make it worse, you smiled. I thought only humans did that. You just ruined my idea of you having maggot teeth; yours are flawlessly white. You must preserve them, so you can eat children. To make it worse, again, you mentioned something. Something about a candy I talked to someone about the other day. Someone was Stranger, who I talked to because I had to kill time. Stranger had great taste in music – rock music. They loved photography. Wouldn’t you be shocked to know we had the same cameras? Someone and Stranger was you, who is oh so repulsive. I said I couldn’t like you, but I can’t hate you either. You’re human. You’re a human that was guilty by association. You chased away the same loneliness that brings back the betrayal, but I guess you felt the betrayal to with the way it was awkward between us for a while. You said I was alright as a person, but to be honest, you're alright. But I think we're alright. And we’ll be alright. You’re not stranger or you, who’s so repulsive. You’re just you: human, friend, and because you like a lot of what I do, alien. Edit: I never really intensely loathed someone as mentioned above, but I wanted too. They never liked American Idol, had Angelina Jolie lips, or wore funny sneakers. I was just trying to capture how people think when they dislike someone. How they magnify these characteristics. It felt awkward around them because of some petty highschool drama between friends. The awkwardness was mutual, but I ended up talking to them the other day, and realized how stupid it really was.

why doesnt my neighbor like me? i like her...? Well i thought we were friends but i feel like shes avoiding me. i mean like she shuts the door when i ring her doorbell to talk to her and she doesnt respond to my phone calls. also she closes alll her blinds so i cant look in her house anymore any ways a few months ago, i moved in and a few days later went over to introduce myself. i told her my name and that im fortysix an im a guy and what kind of cat litter is the best, and my ex-girlfriends address and how i like to sleep on the floor naked at night and my room is covered in posters of edward cullen. and she asked who is edward cullen and i told her he's a fairy and she gave me a funny look an walked away. another conversation i had with her was i told her that i sold my car to pay for gas and she called me an idiot. why?? also i told her once that i pushed my grandma down the stairs so that she would break her back and die in the hospital and i would get money from her will. but grandma only broke a leg and an arm so she didnt die sadly btw. and also finally i brought my neighbor cookies that i baked some of her cat's feces into and she dumped them on the ground. i mean wtf, right??? i thought she liked her cat. i also explained to my neighbor that i think it should be legal to eat humans if they die of natural causes like old age because it is a better use than burying them an it would save a lot of cow and chicken's lives. yeah so i try to do lots of conversations with her an stuff like those examples aan she just ignores me an calls me a freak. why??? i dont understand?? wtf? i like her a lot but she doesnt seem to like me back, or is this some kind of flirting? what did I do rong?

Why are people so unaware/oblivious to everything? Unaware of how nerdy/smart they are acting? Unaware of how dooshy they are being? Unaware of how messy and unhygenic they are? Unaware of how grossly tight their clothing is on their figure? Unaware of the difference between GOOD sarcasm or being serious? Unaware of how they are being a bully? Unaware of how they are being a hypocrite? Unaware of how they are being used/pushed around? Unaware of how they are being annoying and NOT funny? Unaware of how to txt or type correctly? (Its not that hard. FUUU--!) Unaware of how whiney they are being?? Unaware of how creepy and overly dramatic their facial expressions are? I guess i could go on. Anyone notice these things everywhere you go? I know these are kind of contradictory, but i feel like no one in my generation has "common sense" (If that makes sense). I'm 16 in high school, and i don't want to say i'm better than everyone, but EVERYONE their does at least one of these things. You don't have to be perfect, but no one is ever really self-aware of how they are really acting. They say they don't care what anyone thinks, and then turns around a talks shit about another person. You think someone just ACTS stupid to be funny, but then you realize they aren't even trying to be funny, they're just stupid. (I'm not trying to be mean, but thats how it is at my school..) Tennessee. I ACT stupid around my friends, i joke around all the time. (Humor is the spice of life!) I'm a neat freak, but house is vacuumed and organized with alex pardee posters framed on the wall. :) My friends look neat and pretty at school, but when i go to their house they live in HORRIBLE housing with the smell of sour milk and toilet paper! Its messy/dirty/filthy, and they act like its normal! I'm not just saying messy like "i forgot to do laundry, their is legos spilled on the floor", i'm saying the kitchen is filled with rotten food and cat poop. I love my friends and it makes me sad to think that that is normal for them. I FEEL like i'm a normal-popularish girl, i guess. I dated a jock and those guys are filled with stereotype. So i'm not socially awkward or anything, i have a good social life. I don't know, maybe that's just Tennessee, but everyone here seems oblivious to everything, like people having other religious beliefs. Or none at all. I get the feeling if my school knew i was atheist i would be picked on and my house would be burned down. Am i the crazy one here for noticing all these things in people?? Thats a lovely quote. :)

SURVEY......................? Natural hair color: Auburny Red Eye color: Greenish hazel, but mostly green Tattoos: No way. Braces: Not yet... Sadly soon. BLARGH AGAIN, >.< FAVORITE Color: Band: Video game: Movie: Book: Food: CD: Flower: Scent: Animal: Cereal: Website: Cartoon: DO YOU Play an instrument?: Watch TV more than 60 hours a week?: Like to sing?: Have a job?: Have a cell phone?: Like to play sports?: Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: Have a crush on someone?: Live somewhere NOT in the united states?: . Have more than 5 TVs in your house?: Have any special talents/skills?: Exercise daily?: Like school?: CAN YOU Sing the alphabet backwards?: Roll your tongue?: Eat a whole pizza?: HAVE YOU EVER Won something in the lottery?: Snuck out of the house?: Lied to get out of trouble?: Had a computer crash?: Gotten lost in your city?: Been to any other countries?: Stolen something important to someone else?: Solved a rubiks cube?: Gone out in public in your pajamas?: Cried over a girl?: Cried over a boy?: Kissed a random stranger?: Hugged a random stranger?:. Been in a fist fight?: . Laughed and had milk come out of your nose?: Pushed all the buttons on an elevator?: . Sneaked into the opposite sex's bathroom?: Gone to school only to find you had the day off because of a holiday/etc?: Had a water balloon fight in winter?: Bitten someone?: Burped in someone’s face?: . WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU Brushed your teeth: Cried: Went to the bathroom: . Saw a movie in a theatre: Read a book: Had a party: Went to a doctor: Tripped in front of someone: Went to the grocery store: Got cursed: DO YOU PREFER Fruit/vegetables:. Black/white: Lights on/lights off: TV/movie: Body spray/lotion: Pillows/blankets: Chinese food/Mexican food: Summer/winter: Snow/rain: Meat/vegetarian: Chocolate/vanilla: Cake/pie: Ocean/swimming pool: Cookies/muffins: Pink/purple: Cat/dog: Long sleeve/short sleeve: Pants/shorts: Winter break/spring break: Spring/autumn: Questions/Answers: War/Peace: I... Am: Want: Need: Love: Hate: Feel: Miss: Am annoyed by: Am tired of: MISCELLANEOUS What is your favourite genre of music?: Are you hungry right now?: What are you doing right now?: What are you going to do when you're done with this?: If you could have any magical power what would it be?: DO YOU THINK YOU ARE Funny?: Cool?: Pretty?: . Sarcastic?: Lazy?: Hyper?: . Friendly?: Evil?: Unforgettable?: Smart?: Strong?: Talented?: Dorky?: WOULD YOU EVER Sky dive?: Run away?: Curse at a teacher?: Not take a shower for a week?: Ask someone out?: . Lie to someone to make them think better of you?: Visit a foreign country for more than a month?: Go scuba diving?: Write a book?: Have a long-distance relationship?: Marry someone you don't know?: LAST QUESTIONS ( FINALLY ) What grade/level of studies are you in?: Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?: How many posters do you have in your room?:

50 Things I'm Not Allowed to do at Hogwarts. Can anyone explain all of these? I get some of them, and some are inappropriate, but some I just don't get at all. 1. I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their House colors indicate that they are “covered in bees”. 2. No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class. 3. Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is not “an extra credit project for Herbology”. 4. “I’ve heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood’s name” is not a challenge. 5. Putting up Doug Henning posters in Filch’s office is not appropriate. 6. I will not go to class skyclad. 7. The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball. 8. I will not use Umbridge’s quill to write “I told you I was hardcore”. 9. I will stop referring to showering as “giving Moaning Myrtle an eyeful”. 10. Polishing my wand in the common room is acceptable. “Polishing my wand” in the common room is not. 11. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm. 12. House elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers. 13. Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year’s Defence Against Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept. 14. I will not start every Potions class by asking Professor Snape if today’s project is suitable for use as a sexual lubricant. 15. “Liften Separatis Crotchum” is not a real spell. 16. I will not claim Chick Tracts are an accurate presentation of Muggle life. 17. Seamus Finnegan is not “after me Lucky Charms”. 18. I will not refer to the Weasley twins as “bookends”. 19. I will not refer to the Patil twins as “bookends”. 20. I will not call the Defence Against Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak. 21. There is no such thing as a were-thylacine. 22. I will not provide Luna Lovegood with Coast-to-Coast AM transcripts. 23. I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class. 24. I will not place anything by Silver Ravenwolf on the library shelves. 25. Tricking a school house elf into stripping does not mean that they are now mine, even if I yell “Pwned!”. 26. I am not a sloth Animagus. 27. I am not a tribble Animagus. 28. I am allowed to have a toad, rat, cat, or owl. I am not allowed to have a reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or pirahna. 29. I do not weight the same as a duck. 30. Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar. 31. I do not have a Dalek Patronus. 32. I will not lick Trevor. 33. I will stop asking the Arithmancy teacher what the square root of -1 is. 34. The Ravenclaws are not “Mentats in training”. 35. Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is coincidental. 36. I will not change the password to the prefects’ bath to “Makes getting clean almost as much fun as getting dirty”. 37. There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong. 38. Professor Flitwick does not wish to be addressed as “Admiral Naismith”. 39. Asking “How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?” and walking away is only funny the first time. 40. I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey. 41. I will not offer to pose nude for Dean Thomas. 42. It is a bad idea to tell Professor Snape he takes himself too seriously. 43. It is a bad idea to tell Professor McGonagall she takes herself too seriously. 44. I am not to Owl copies of the Evil Overlord List to suspected Death Eaters. 45. I will not offer to prepare tandoori owl. 46. I will stop asking when we will learn to make “Love Potion Number Nine”. 47. I will not ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick. 48. I will not teach the first-years to sing “A Wizard’s Staff Has A Knob On The End”. 49. If Ginny Weasley wanted to borrow my Darkover books, she would have said so already. 50. I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

What's the funniest? Name some of the funniest things you've seen on t-shirts or posters. Here's one of mine: We had to get rid of the kids, the cat was allergic!! Let's hear some good ones...

helpp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!? i have a pep rally tomo and need a relly fun poster not just a good one i need one that is hilarious we are playing a team called the jaguars and here is what i have it set up as NIBLETT who is our coach so far i have this spaiN park I B L E kitTY caT(s) help fill in the middle for something funny

~~~Fun Anime Poll~~~? Okay so im bored...... Heres an anime Poll ^__^ 1.Worst anime you've ever seen.. 2.Anime character you'd spend the day with.. 3.Most annoying anime character 4.Best art Design 5.Most interesting plot 6.Most emotional anime 7.Worst english dub 8.Funniest anime you've ever seen 9.Most Romantic 10.Whats your fav genre Which one Bleach or Naruto Neko(cat) or vampire Anime Poster of Plushie Dub or Sub Horror or Comedy Canon pairing or crack pairing Did you like this Poll?? :^D

Need guidance to help a spirit who recently passed? You may have heard of the tragic incident in Burgess Hill of the teenager Zach O'Connor who lost his life April 4th of this year by smashing sideways in to a tree and getting crushed. I never knew him directly but as a friend of a friend and last night I went to see a psychic who he contacted and she even mentioned my friends name Matt, and I asked what his name was to make sure she said well hes showing me my old cat Isaac Newton but we called him Zacchy. It was the most amazing thing and he gave her a phone number, said he wants me to tell his family a few things. Shall I phone this number or do you think they won't believe it? I'm 15 and I just really wanna help him I never knew him but he was a friend to everyone and apparently according to Matt and the psychic rather funny. He said I always wanted to be famous but I didn't know I had to die and at the end he said I may not have been perfect but I was pretty damn nip! He said only his family would know about Billy Elliot poster. He didn't give me an address. No names I already know his name is Zach O'connor so I have his surname. But all he gave me was this number which I have to work hard to do much with.

Zach O'Connor? You may have heard of the tragic incident in Burgess Hill of the teenager Zach O'Connor who lost his life April 4th of this year by smashing sideways in to a tree and getting crushed. I never knew him directly but as a friend of a friend and last night I went to see a psychic who he contacted and she even mentioned my friends name Matt, and I asked what his name was to make sure she said well hes showing me my old cat Isaac Newton but we called him Zacchy. It was the most amazing thing and he gave her a phone number, said he wants me to tell his family a few things. Shall I phone this number or do you think they won't believe it? I'm 15 and I just really wanna help him I never knew him but he was a friend to everyone and apparently according to Matt and the psychic rather funny. He said I always wanted to be famous but I didn't know I had to die and at the end he said I may not have been perfect but I was pretty damn nip! He said only his family would know about Billy Elliot poster He specifically gave me the number as if he wants me to call it. I don't have the address just O'Connor, Burgess Hill and the number

Any memories of things you and your best friend have did? The longest list gets the best answer. Here's mine: 1. Walked around the block with her kittens in a stroller. 2. Snuck across the field to see a horse and got in trouble. 3. Made our own website. 4. Played PlayStation all night. 5. Played a Go Fish game in five minutes. In the car! 6. Danced to country music at night. 7. Played the DS for hours. 8. Prank called random people from the phone book and got in trouble. 9. When we were little, we played horses. 10. Caught a Wooly Bear and named him Faggot Timmy, but it died at school. 11. Played with my pygmy goats. 12. Ran through the cornfield when it was really tall. 13. Played with my dog, Max, in my yard. 14. Stole corn from the field and set it out for deer to come, but they didn't. 15. Had a picnic at the school playground when nobody was there. We had jelly sandwiches and tap water. 16. Made a webshow on YouTube. 17. Took Barbies and threw them in the pool. 18. Played with Littlest Pet Shops at midnight, and pretended they were all drunk. 19. Ran through a blizzard. Our faces hurt, afterward. 20. Took nail polish, turned up the radio, then painted over a poster I didn't like. 21. Bothered my neighbors. 22. Jumped on a trampoline for over an hour. 23. Kicked off our shoes when we were swinging in kindergarten. 24. Prank called another "friend" and got in big trouble. 25. Sung really loud outside, really early in the morning. 26. Went to church together. 27. Did homework together at midnight. 28. Went trick or treating together. 29. Won kites for best costume. I was a turtle, she was a cheerleader. 30. Played jump rope with a toy snake. 31. Played WWE Day Of Reckoning all day. 32. Ate over 30 Milky Ways and Kit Kats. 33. Played volleyball with no net. 34. Watched a Spongebob marathon. 35. Threw a party celebrating Spongebob's 10 Year Anniversary. 36. Okay, this one is kind of a story: We went into the cafeteria bathroom at school. She had to poop really bad, so I waited and stuff then she came out and said, "It won't flush!" So we took a really long time trying to flush it. It was an automatic one kinda, so she was sitting and standing up and stuff. It was really funny! 37. When I got my Wii, we played Wii Sports all day because it was snowing outside. 38. Watched my sister play hunting games. Fell asleep 'cause it was real late at night. 39. Snuck out of the house when my dad was asleep. 40. Put fake tattoos everywhere on us and walked around. 41. Called each other constantly. 42. In the summer I would call her and see if she could come swim, then when she was about to leave, we would ask if she could stay the night, and she always did. 43. Had her stay the night for five nights in a row. 44. Tried break dancing but failed epicly. 45. Ran from bees. Wasn't very fun... 46. Went to her family reunion. 47. When we were little, we would watch Strawberry Shortcake. 48. Rode in my dad's Jeep when the top was off. 49. Made home-made birthday cards for each other. 50. When we were little, we would eat grass and pretended we were cows. 51. Hung out with these little boys that lived next to me. They threw rocks at this one guy in his truck, and when the guy in the truck turned around, we ran into the woods. 52. Played with walky Talkies. 53. Had many fights, but always made up. 54. Scared turkies away. 55. Tried to do The Worm. 56. Went over to the neighbors house and played on their mini playground thing. 57. Told each other our crushes. 58. Climbed trees. 59. Raked leaves. 60. Decorated the road with leaves, corn, and stuff to make it look 'fall-ish'. 61. Had a burping contest using mini cans of Sunkist. 62. Found and fed a stray cat and named it Caddie Woodlawn. 63. Played tag in the house. 64. Crawled around the house. 65. Played a random game of Life. 66. Played Wii Sports Resort together, all night. 67. Rode on the bus together on our trip to Columbus. 68. Spit in the Scioto River. 69. Threw a glove in the school toilet. 70. On an overnight school trip to COSI, we stayed up all night talking and giggling about stuff. 71. Almost finished Shrek 2 for the GameCube, without cheats. 72. Stood in the middle of the road and imagined someone with a chain-saw was chasing us. Don't ask, we're weird. 73. Found a dead squirrel in my pool. Ew. 74. At COSI, she got high, because this Adventure place had smoke everywhere. She dropped her water bottle, screamed, and ran away. 75. Got soaked with a fire-fighter hose. 76. Trusted each other with our Facebook passwords. 77. Walked up to the tavern and bought orange and purple pop, mixed 'em together, and made our own kind of beer. 78. Was late for class for talking too long. 79. Climbed out of my window. Failed slightly. 80. Danced to Bad Romance at a school dance. 81. Sent a letter to the Flarp company because the Flarp was too gooey. 82. At Fun Night, we jumped a

what do you think of our videos?? yeah so we did end up doing a youtube video but we dressed my cat mikko, up as hannah montana and called him mikko montana and we messed up on the first one but put it up there anyway well actually we messed up a lot but thought the first one was funny. yeah its kinda weird but we were just joking around. im the one with the long brown hair and the blonde is my best friend courtney and my brother recorded it for us. (you can see my pete poster in the background. lol) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIqyppyoKeo http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXon_iE9Pdc

What shoulod I get these people for Christmas? I want something that will be very cheap, because I'm 13 and don't have much money (I have a total of $100 to spend on EVERYONE this year) My Dad- He loves cars, he does car racing, he likes cats, he likes chocolate and chips but I don't want to get him that this year because I get him junk food every year. His favorite color is red and he LOVES Christmas just like me :) The lady next door- She is a senior, she just retrired and no longer goes to work, she has 2 golden retrievers one is 10 years old the other is 12 years old, she likes flowers (but I don't want to get her a plant...) She likes fish and she is very nice, I wanted to get her just a small gift and a card to say Merry Christmas so any ideas what I could get her? My best friend- she LOVES animals, like animals are her whole life, she has tons of pets (so I can't get her any pets) she loves horseback riding, walking dogs, training dogs, she is a volenteer at the animal shelter, she has enough books on animals so I don't want to get her another book like I did last year, her entire room is animal themed (paw print blankets and pillows, animal pictures all over the walls, animal books and movies on her shelf, she collects little animal figurines) So any ideas on where I could find animal stuff for her room? She is just turned 14 yesterday. My friend that lives down the street- She is 11, I don't talk to her thst much but we walk our dogs togetger in the summer sometimes, and we sometimes go sleeding together (not to often anymore though) she likes nature,she has a dog and 2 guinea pigs, her favorite color is green, she loves fashion and magazines (I really don't want to get her a magazine or gift card) and she has TONS of clothes, she has a whole bunch of fashion posters in her room, and she likes to go for walks. My friend at school- She lives pretty far from me (45 minute drive) she is affraid of dogs (so she can't come to my house, the first time she came over she cried because my dog jumped on her) She has no pets and doesn't want any, she is my only friend at my school so I want to get her something nice, she loves pink she is SUPER girly, like she wears tons of make up, and always wears skirts and she talks girly, she is really funny though (that's what I like most about her) and she likes to sing, and she loves swimming. I have no idea what to get her because I don't want to get her a gift card or make up since that's what everyone is getting her. She is 13. This is the last person, my little sister- Also a huge animal lover, she loves dogs, she has never been horse back riding but says she wants to try it, she has her own pet hamster, fish and 2 hermit crabs, we have a family dog, her favorite color is purple, she says she wants a large megnetic board for Christmas so she can stick pictures and magnets to it, my mom is gettting her the board but I was thinking of getting her some animal magnets to go with the board. She is 9. Any ideas what I can get everyone? I know it's kinda a long list, but they are the only people I still didn't shop for and it's hard since I don't have much money to spend. I will pick best answer!! :) Thanks Also I know how to spell Should... I just typed it wrong by accident.

Have you ever owned rats before? Heya, I'm just putting together some literature on rat care for my animal shelters open day and thought it would be nice to collect some quotes from rat lovers/owners. Please add your quote about why you like rats, what your favourite kind of rat is, something funny your rat did, a little unknown rat tip e.t.c along with your name, state/county and town. If you leave a nice comment, it will appear on posters around the shelter. Thankyou for your contributions! Just so you know what you're giving to as well, it's a brilliant no-care kill shelter that rescues and re-homes cats, dogs, and small animals. They really look after their animals well and only home pets to approved homes. Thanks! Oh just to let you know, I'm English and so is the shelter, Bath Cats and Dogs Home. I just put state because I know the majority of the people on here are American/Canadian. Sorry JB Girl, but you can't catch head lice from pet rats - they do not carry the species and any parasites they do carry are rare and only down to a neglecting owner and unsanitary environment. Parasites on rats can be quickly dealt with by antibiotics but do not affect children. The child obviously gets them from other human children at school.

What are the rules concerning use of random internet images? There are so many that who can say who originally took the photos and who edited them and who added which captions. So let's say that one wished to use some of these images in his/her designs (greeting cards, calendars, t-shirts, posters, etc.). Would that be ethical? What if said person made a profit from selling such products? Would this be stepping on copyright toes? Does "fair use" apply here? Consider the following: Person A takes a simple photo of a cat doing something silly or interesting. Maybe this person even adds a caption. Person B finds this pic on the internet and edits it. Changes the background and/or adds other elements. And adds a new and funnier caption. Person C finds the revised image and makes his/her own changes. Person D mixes bits and pieces of found images with his/her original elements. Who owns what?

What could I have or is this a phase? I know I am not bipolar, nor depressed - checked by a professional, so what could I have? When I was younger, I use to hurt animals for fun like drag them by their tail or throw a cat/dog under a blanket and trap them. Then watch them struggle. Or when I kicked a ball with a hamster in it, playing a game with my brother until it died. Me and my brother had this massive poster. We use to hang all the kittens up at the top - they cling onto it with their paws- and we watched them slide down wailing like hell. Oh and I can remember taking all the fish out of the fish tank and either letting them flop on the couch or my pillow until they died or my mother saved them all. It was so funny. There was another time when my mother had gotten a rabbit. I picked it up by it's ears. Me and my brother did crazy stuff. Also I use to shop lift like crazy and run away all the time, luggingy brother along. I get dizzy, tired and anxious when I am around people for too long and in public surrounded by too many people. I just cannot stand being around other people. Just hate everyone. I prefer isolation, but I have two friends and a bf. I am socially awkward and find it hard to build conversation on "normal" talk and tend to talk about stuff that most people feel uncomfortable discussing or something above what they understand, like some subjects in science. It does not help that I find it hard to pick up on how people feel emotionally and that can make it hard to understand when people are joking or not. Overall, I am told I have a serious look about myself and am in fact a serious person and rarely joke about anything. It is not that I am unhappy. There is this thing I do that is weird. So on the first week of attending my classes, I scope out the class, analyzing every single individual. I am good at deciphering who is who and what they are like based on what they do that week and how they dress. It's like I can see their personality in their eyes. I picked my two friends up based on this concept and it works. I told one of them and they thought it was cool. I am aggressive; easily angered. At times I have to watch myself as I can be violent towards other people, especially my dog. I have a weird fascination for dead bodies and get enticed when watching people are being tortured or killed. I sketch pictures of people being tortured or beheaded and write stories on people being tortured and killed with great gory detail because I love it and get a high off it. I cannot stop there, I collected over 300 photos of brutally killed people and have a huge collection on movies and books on real or made up serial killers. I just love the site of it. When I write about killing/ torturing someone, I can close my eyes and see myself in my character's shoes. All the smells of blood fill my nose and I can see and feel myself doing the act. It is just getting more intense with each day that goes by. Even bought a huge blade to add to the feeling. There are plenty of times when I am standing in front of someone, anyone, I think in my head "I can just strangle them here" and how I could kill them. Or when I am sitting a restaurant with my bf and his family and I can picture myself killing everyone in that room. Just seeing how they would react excites me. It is all I can think of, even moments like when I am doing a speech or even swimming. I even have dreams every night - I can't control these ones- where I am murdering people. Is this a phase and what could be wrong with me if anything? I thought I was normal. I am 20 years old. Please mind my minor spelling errors. It is quite late where I am. Well if I think about it, when I hit my brother and he would cry, so I would force myself to cry and tell on him claiming he hit me. He always got in trouble. I find when I hit my bf or accidentally injure him majorly, I feel nothing. I do find it funny though. Asperger syndrome; I do not exhibit any facial they have. I have asked my friend who is a specialist and she told me that I am totally not. *I do not exhibit any facial characteristics.

How could I improve my poem? I've only met her once When I was really young Two or three, three or four And the memories.... They're not really clear. Not clear enough To last me so long Without her I remember a smile Wide and a bit forced Everyone forces on a smile When around children She scrunches up her nose When she smiles. I thought she was pretty Like a brown haired Barbie doll... My Aunt Barbie We pulled up to their little country home I don't even remember which state It was in the U.S, though. I remember that much. There were horses, And dogs, and cats. I was excited about the horses But not about the dogs I was afraid of the dogs We walked inside a brick house Or was it made of something else? It's all a bit fuzzy Things get that way When they happened years ago There was a chess set and checkers I wanted to play and my brother did too He was only barely speaking at the time A little baby in my mother's arms Well, we couldn't play chess I was really upset about that But I was proud of myself For not bursting out crying Even though I had a huge lump in my throat My parents yelled at me For shedding a few tears I couldn't bring down But I was so young I went to my cousin's room What was her name...? Heather. That's right. She gave me a bunch of clothes Not the most exciting thing But I acted like I loved them anyway She was a teenager, and I was in awe Of the posters and clothes strewn around the room Teenagers were the coolest. My cousin had a brother Oh geez, what was his name now? I really don't recall. Isn't that pitiful? He wouldn't let me in his room Which only wanted me to go in more He could ride a skateboard. I thought that was amazing. He never said much to me though He was too cool for me. Another thing I remember Is feeding the horses My father would hold me up to the fence Aunt Barbie held the carrots within my reach She showed me how to do it It was so hard and scary You put the baby carrots in your hand And held them up to a horse's face I didn't want them to bite me But after Aunt Barbie did it, I took a carrot Held it out, thrusting my palm upward My fingers curved down, trying to stay away From the horse's teeth The horse pressed his furry lips into my palm It was a funny feeling, and I laughed Making my palm shake, and the carrot fall To the grass below If I had such a good time With Aunt Barbie and my cousins Why do we never go back? I had fun. Loads of it. I guess my dad felt differently About his only visit to his sister Since my birth They have some kind of rivalry But they're brother and sister Aren't they supposed to be there for each other? Aren't they supposed to love each other? To send each other gifts at Christmas To call each other and ask how they're doing To send each other cards on their birthdays What, not a single card? Ever? She's not dead, you know. She's still alive And I want her to be a part of my life She's my aunt, and I don't want to be forced Forced to ignore that she is even there. Why do you even hate her so much? When I ask, I get a stupid answer "Because they're so different" My mother says "They don't get along real well" My father refuses to say anything So what if they're different? So what if they don't get along? My brothers and I don't get along either Does that mean I should do what My father is doing? What my aunt is doing? Should I cut them out of my life completely? Is there some family feud? Some secret I don't know about? I'm a big girl now You can tell me. I won't freak out. I promise.

What Do U Think Of My Story So Far? sorry this is long!! ------- “Brooklyn!” My younger brother Aaron screams after me. Me and Amber keep running, almost tripping from laughing so hard. “Brooklyn! Give me back the stupid remote!” He screams. Me and Amber have just interrupted him and his stupid show, the amazing baseball with the stupid Chicago Cubs. I just stole the remote and shut off the TV, and now he’s flipping out on me by running and screaming. My mom steps in front of me and I skid to a halt. “Brooklyn, give your brother the remote back. It is, after all, his fifteenth birthday.” She looks at me with the Do-What-I-Say-Right-Now-Before-I-Have-To-Take-Your-Friend-Home look. I sigh and toss Aaron the remote. He quickly turns the game back on and screams. “They won! Oh my god! The Cubs just won the World Series!” He freaks out for another minute or two then my mom calms him down. She tells him to go to his friend Tony’s house and celebrate there and that he can spend the night. He runs out like a bat out of hell, too. Me and Amber help my mom out in the kitchen a bit before we go back up to my room. As we enter my room, Amber’s mouth drops open. This is her first time here. The four poster bed is encircled by bronze engraved end tables and lamps, and the bed holds plush pillows colored deep reds, browns, and gold hues. Arches accent the walls, and the chandelier is directly above the bed. It is heaven in here. “This… is your room?” She asks, stunned by the beauty. I smile. “Yep,” then I laugh. “You should see my parents’ room. Or try Aaron’s. Both of them are about ten times as big as my room.” We laugh in harmony and Amber takes out a yearbook from her backpack. Me and her smile like the Cheshire Cat. Yearbook Time. “Goth! Emo! Prep! God, that dude was a jerk! She was so pretty! That’s, Adam? No it’s not! God, he’s cute! Ohmigosh, that teacher was a pervert!” Amber and I echo. We keep laughing and pointing at teachers, students, enemies, best friends, and everyone who has a funny picture from kindergarten all the way to this year. By the time we’re done laughing and drinking almost five root bear floats, it’s already three in the morning. “What do you wanna do now?” Amber half laughs, half whispers. “Well, we should be kind of quiet. My mom and dad are sleeping but they’re really heavy sleepers, so I say not over volume ninety-nine.” I grin as I take a drink of my sixth root beer float. “Music video parody time?” Amber asks. “I’ll go get my camera!” I laugh, and then run out to the living room. My video camera is right by my pet bunny’s cage. I stick my finger through the cage and pet her nose. Then I double check to make sure the door is locked and return to Amber. When I walk into my room, all I hear is Davey Havok screaming “Medicate!” “Amber! Turn it down!” I scream. She jumps when she hears my voice but turns the music down. “Thank you,” I whisper. She returns it with a smile. “So I guess we’re making fun of Davey, Adam, Hunter, and Jade?” “Duh! Those guys are so hot though! AFI’s my favorite band! Right there with the Beatles!” Amber whispers. I laugh. “You don’t have to whisper, Amber, just stay a little bit quiet. Just make sure to save your energy for the video!” She nods. “I call Davey! I have the hair for it! Or at least his old hair!” Truthfully, she does. Amber has a bit of Asian in her, and her hair is naturally black, and a couple months ago she highlighted parts of it bleach blond. The style is something like very short on the right, with the left side swept down all the way past her chin. I’ve always compared her hair to the way Rihanna used to have it. “Fine! I call Jade and Adam! I have a flat iron and a black wig!” I laugh. “You’re stuck with Hunter! Don’t worry, I’m sure if we shave your head now, it’ll grow back by the time you’re forty.” I laugh some more. Sadly, I don’t get to shave Amber’s head bald. We eventually find a bald cap that my oldest brother, Chase, had from an old play. So that’s what she wears for Hunter. After two hours of making fun of “Miss Murder”, editing the video, and putting it on You Tube, we finally crash out at five a.m. I’m dreaming of Edward Scissorhands and me out on a date when Amber shakes me awake. “Brookes! I heard someone open the front door!” I look around, still groggy, and see that it’s still dark out. I squint and see my digital clock. It reads five forty five. “Amber… it’s almost six in the morning… no one opened the door… go back to sleep. We’ll be fine. My dad has a gun room downstairs. If anything happens… we’ll just go down… there…” I say, partially falling asleep. “Brookes! Wake up!” Amber slaps me across the face. Not hard, but enough to give me an electric shock. “Ouch! That hurt!” I jolt up. She mouths a sorry and stands up. “Let me get changed first. I’m freezing,” I look at her and she nods. I go to my walk in closet and change from my blue pajama pants to black skinny jeans and change my black te tee shirt to an old purple Aeropostale shirt my mom had gotten me. When I walk out of my closet I see that Amber has changed into her matching jeans and an AC/DC shirt. “Amber… I swear. It’s nothing…” I start to say that it was probably just Aaron, but then I remember he spent the night at a friend’s house. “Brookes, can we just check it out? Or go to your dad’s gun room thing?” She asks. I nod and start to open the door, but then close it immediately. “Brookes! What was it?” I can tell my eyes are wide. I don’t need a mirror to see that. “I, I think I just saw a guy…” I whisper. I walk across the room and grab my enV Touch. “Come on, Amber. We’re going downstairs…” “What about your mom and dad?” “My dad went to work and five… and I think my mom drives him.” She nods and we quickly leave the room to the downstairs. “Um, Amber? How about we go the cops? I don’t think it’s that good of an idea to stay here…” “Yeah, I guess. Is there a door down here?” I nod and we leave throu through there. “Wait!” I half whisper, half yell when we are about ten feet from the house. “I forgot Char!” I run back in and up the stairs. I am shocked to see she’s not in her cage and turn to leave when I hear Amber scream. I run back down and out the door. Outside, right where I left her, is Amber. She is lying on the ground with blood surrounding her. I can’t tell if she is alive or not. “Amber…” I whisper. “Amber…” I see her mouth moving to form words. Then she whispers quietly. “Is he gone?” “What? Who?” Amber sits up and I almost die from a heart attack. “I’ll take that as a yes. Come on, we have to hurry. That idiot just slammed a meat cleaver in my leg.” I notice then that her pants are torn. “Can you walk?” I feel stupid for asking, but she says that she can. We immediately make a run for the forest in my backyard. I look behind one final time and swear I see a light on in my parents’ room. Before we enter the dark forest, I hear my mother’s scream and my father’s yell. Tears immediately stream down my face ---- yea... sorry it's so long!

Zach O'Connor? You may have heard of the tragic incident in Burgess Hill of the teenager Zach O'Connor who lost his life April 4th of this year by smashing sideways in to a tree and getting crushed. I never knew him directly but as a friend of a friend and last night I went to see a psychic who he contacted and she even mentioned my friends name Matt, and I asked what his name was to make sure she said well hes showing me my old cat Isaac Newton but we called him Zacchy. It was the most amazing thing and he gave her a phone number, said he wants me to tell his family a few things. Shall I phone this number or do you think they won't believe it? I'm 15 and I just really wanna help him I never knew him but he was a friend to everyone and apparently according to Matt and the psychic rather funny. He said I always wanted to be famous but I didn't know I had to die and at the end he said I may not have been perfect but I was pretty damn nip! He said only his family would know about Billy Elliot poster.

Any memories of things you and your best friend have did? Longest list gets best answer! :) Here's mine: 1. Walked around the block with her kittens in a stroller. 2. Snuck across the field to see a horse and got in trouble. 3. Made our own website. 4. Played PlayStation all night. 5. Played a Go Fish game in five minutes. In the car! 6. Danced to country music at night. 7. Played the DS for hours. 8. Prank called random people from the phone book and got in trouble. 9. When we were little, we played horses. 10. Caught a Wooly Bear and named him Faggot Timmy, but it died at school. 11. Played with my pygmy goats. 12. Ran through the cornfield when it was really tall. 13. Played with my dog, Max, in my yard. 14. Stole corn from the field and set it out for deer to come, but they didn't. 15. Had a picnic at the school playground when nobody was there. We had jelly sandwiches and tap water. 16. Made a webshow on YouTube. 17. Took Barbies and threw them in the pool. 18. Played with Littlest Pet Shops at midnight, and pretended they were all drunk. 19. Ran through a blizzard. Our faces hurt, afterward. 20. Took nail polish, turned up the radio, then painted over a poster I didn't like. 21. Bothered my neighbors. 22. Jumped on a trampoline for over an hour. 23. Kicked off our shoes when we were swinging in kindergarten. 24. Prank called another "friend" and got in big trouble. 25. Sung really loud outside, really early in the morning. 26. Went to church together. 27. Did homework together at midnight. 28. Went trick or treating together. 29. Won kites for best costume. I was a turtle, she was a cheerleader. 30. Played jump rope with a toy snake. 31. Played WWE Day Of Reckoning all day. 32. Ate over 30 Milky Ways and Kit Kats. 33. Played volleyball with no net. 34. Watched a Spongebob marathon. 35. Threw a party celebrating Spongebob's 10 Year Anniversary. 36. Okay, this one is kind of a story: We went into the cafeteria bathroom at school. She had to poop really bad, so I waited and stuff then she came out and said, "It won't flush!" So we took a really long time trying to flush it. It was an automatic one kinda, so she was sitting and standing up and stuff. It was really funny! 37. When I got my Wii, we played Wii Sports all day because it was snowing outside. 38. Watched my sister play hunting games. Fell asleep 'cause it was real late at night. 39. Snuck out of the house when my dad was asleep. 40. Put fake tattoos everywhere on us and walked around. 41. Called each other constantly. 42. In the summer I would call her and see if she could come swim, then when she was about to leave, we would ask if she could stay the night, and she always did. 43. Had her stay the night for five nights in a row. 44. Tried break dancing but failed epicly. 45. Ran from bees. Wasn't very fun... 46. Went to her family reunion. 47. When we were little, we would watch Strawberry Shortcake. 48. Rode in my dad's Jeep when the top was off. 49. Made home-made birthday cards for each other. 50. When we were little, we would eat grass and pretended we were cows. 51. Hung out with these little boys that lived next to me. They threw rocks at this one guy in his truck, and when the guy in the truck turned around, we ran into the woods. 52. Played with walky Talkies. 53. Had many fights, but always made up. 54. Scared turkies away. 55. Tried to do The Worm. 56. Went over to the neighbors house and played on their mini playground thing. 57. Told each other our crushes. 58. Climbed trees. 59. Raked leaves. 60. Decorated the road with leaves, corn, and stuff to make it look 'fall-ish'. 61. Had a burping contest using mini cans of Sunkist. 62. Found and fed a stray cat and named it Caddie Woodlawn. 63. Played tag in the house. 64. Crawled around the house. 65. Played a random game of Life. 66. Played Wii Sports Resort together, all night. 67. Rode on the bus together on our trip to Columbus. 68. Spit in the Scioto River. 69. Threw a glove in the school toilet. 70. On an overnight school trip to COSI, we stayed up all night talking and giggling about stuff. 71. Almost finished Shrek 2 for the GameCube, without cheats. 72. Stood in the middle of the road and imagined someone with a chain-saw was chasing us. Don't ask, we're weird. 73. Found a dead squirrel in my pool. Ew. 74. At COSI, she got high, because this Adventure place had smoke everywhere. She dropped her water bottle, screamed, and ran away. 75. Got soaked with a fire-fighter hose. 76. Trusted each other with our Facebook passwords. 77. Walked up to the tavern and bought orange and purple pop, mixed 'em together, and made our own kind of beer. 78. Was late for class for talking too long. 79. Climbed out of my window. Failed slightly. 80. Danced to Bad Romance at a school dance. 81. Sent a letter to the Flarp company because the Flarp was too gooey. 82. At Fun Night, we jumped around

Why does my neighbor think I'm so weird? what did I do? Well i thought we were friends but i feel like shes avoiding me. i mean like she shuts the door when i ring her doorbell to talk to her and she doesnt respond to my phone calls. also she closes alll her blinds so i cant look in her house anymore any ways a few months ago, i moved in and a few days later went over to introduce myself. i told her my name and that im fortysix an im a guy and what kind of cat litter is the best, and my ex-girlfriends address and how i like to sleep on the floor naked at night and my room is covered in posters of edward cullen. and she asked who is edward cullen and i told her he's a fairy and she gave me a funny look an walked away. another conversation i had with her was i told her that i sold my car to pay for gas and she called me an idiot. why?? also i told her once that i pushed my grandma down the stairs so that she would break her back and die in the hospital and i would get money from her will. but grandma only broke a leg and an arm so she didnt die sadly btw. and also finally i brought my neighbor cookies that i baked some of her cat's feces into and she dumped them on the ground. i mean wtf, right??? i thought she liked her cat. i also explained to my neighbor that i think it should be legal to eat humans if they die of natural causes like old age because it is a better use than burying them an it would save a lot of cow and chicken's lives. yeah so i try to do lots of conversations with her an stuff like those examples aan she just ignores me an calls me a freak. why??? i dont understand?? wtf?

I found what I thought was a "stray" kitten and now I have a bit of a problem PART 2. New info added!? Here is the original PART 1 for those who haven't read it: I know this is kind of long but, I really could use some help! I don't know if anyone here remembers the story I posted a few days ago about finding a "stray" kitten. So, I'll do a short recap of it. My daughter and I heard meowing outside our window that sounded quite pitiful. I thought a neighborhood cat was either trapped or hurt so, we went out to investigate. We found a kitten stuck up in the tree. Just as we were looking up, the kitten came crashing through the branches and literally landed in my arms. He was really tiny so, I didn't feel so comfortable just leaving him outside. We brought him in and when my husband got home from work we decided to bring him to our local vet to see if he was micro-chipped or if anyone had reported a lost kitten there. He was not micro-chipped or reported missing. The vet told us he was 10 weeks old, infested with fleas, and not extremely well fed. In her opinion, he was a stray. Under the circumstances, we decided to keep him. The vet gave him a worming pill, flea pill, and his first vaccinations. That was 4 days ago. Since then we have been spoiling our little Ricky (which we named him)! I stocked up on kitten food, kitten milk, cat litter, and a whole basket full of cat toys. He has been extremely happy with us. He loves to play, fall asleep and purr in our arms, and he has been eating constantly! Not once did I have the impression that he missed someone or that he wasn't happy, etc. So, I was a little surprised that I saw a missing poster for a kitten the other day on a post by my house. I'm still not sure if the poster is referring to Ricky or not though. All it says is "Missing: A little gray tomcat" and the phone number. There is no photo or other details such as age, markings, etc. I live in a pretty populated area so, it is possible that this poster is referring to another lost cat. Also, our little Ricky is NOT gray. He is your typical brown and black tiger (tabby). My husband and I talked it over and we decided that we are not going to call the number and see if it is indeed Ricky that they are missing. We feel like that if the poster is referring to our kitten, they don't deserve to have him back (as blunt and selfish as that sounds). He is only 10 weeks old and they were letting him outside without any type of ID. He was infested with fleas which the vet said doesn't happen overnight (this is one of the main reasons why she believed that he was a stray). And he was starving! Now he gets to eat like a little prince. I know I probably sound really immature and selfish right now but, I love Ricky so much already that I couldn't bear to give him back to someone who obviously was neglecting him. I couldn't bear to give him to people who couldn't even write that he was a tiger on a poster, his age, his personality traits, or distinguishing marks. If you could only see how content he looks and how much he purrs when we cuddle him. I hate even leaving the house for half an hour to go to the grocery store because I'm afraid that he will be lonely without us. Does anyone see my dilemma? What is your opinion about this situation? Please feel free to be honest. I need some advice right now. Here is an updated PART 2: I took the advice that someone suggested on YA and did a reverse search on the phone number to find the address. Surprisingly, the address came up not too far from me and it is someone I know. In fact, I asked a question about them before here on YA: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AlTjIZlgdr8sNrPQNJXc1z7ty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20080805002950AAVBc5E This is a snippet of my question: "About 3 of my neighbors own rabbits. I don't know if they think this is cute or something but, they let the bunnies run completely free all day and night. I think there are about 5 or 6 rabbits running free." If the lost cat poster is referring to Ricky, I know now that I am NOT taking a child's beloved pet. The neighbors in question are a middle-aged couple with neglected rabbits. In a funny way, I am almost relieved to know that these are the people who put up the poster. Because there is NO WAY that our little Ricky is going back there to be tossed outside and neglected again. With this new information, I don't feel guilty in the slightest bit. And if the poster is not referring to Ricky, then he is still a "stray". So, basically I just wanted to thank everyone who gave me the great idea to check up on the people who put up the poster. I feel relieved. I was wondering what everyone thinks now with the new information added? Thanks if you did actually read all of this!

do these people really speak like this or does lol cats have a built in thing that changes text? below is what im talking about here is a entire page of lolcat comments. sombra June 7th, 2008 at 12:01 am Sumbunny is werry hoppee fur yu! Reply to this comment s.t.e.n.d. June 7th, 2008 at 1:31 am mr. tinycarrot turns opera critic? Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 2:11 am Leopold? Stokowski? Reply to this comment JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 2:42 am stagehanddan - may ai pleez uze yur staj heer fur just a minnit? . An cud yoo pleez put taht spotlite awn mee??? Thanks. . Deer Ebreewun! It will taek me DAYZ to thank ebreewun fur taht most amazing and .wunnderful birfday party. Nebber in mai laif hav ai scene teh laik ov it. . . Ai wuz so bizzy reeding ebreething (an turning off teh pewter cuz ov teh storm, an tawking to awl teh peeple hoo called, an awl teh peeple hoo dropt in - an so awn) taht ai cudn’t eben maek a DENT in teh tahnk yoos!! . But ai hav manajed to reed EBREEE WERD!! An ai will thank yoo awl az fast az ai can. But it will taek a wile. . So in teh meen wile, tahnk yoo awl again frum teh vereee bottom ov mai hart. . LOL!!! Wun person sayd “hoo cares if it’s janet’s birthday! This is supposed to be funny commint about cats!” An so it iz!! But ar wee nawt awl kittehs heer togedder???? . Teh thing is - yoo awl - mai moast verree deerest frenz - cared. An taht maeks mai ayes go awl leekee!! An ai will NEBBER furgit yoo! Ai will fur shur hold yoo in mai hart furebber. . *maeks a deep curtsey - an exits wif HYOOOJ smyol awn fayce DS right* Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 2:50 am *haz SR(stage right) prop-tart hand-off hawt-chawklit to jch4k* Reply to this comment JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 2:55 am OOOOOhhh!! Thanks, stagehanddan! Ai’m nawt usuallee nervous wehn maeking the speeches, but taht wun. . .*sip sip sip* Ai dunno. *sip sip sip* This iz deLISHus!! Did yoo put sumthing speshul in it??? Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 3:04 am ob coarse, a little rum, a little vanilla, a little cinnamonon, a little moar rum. better test the rum while I’m at it. Reply to this comment kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 3:28 am Yes, yes… *donkee frowns seriously and nods solemnly* I highly recommend intense inspection…. Reply to this comment martoonie June 7th, 2008 at 3:44 am Hmm, ai’m nawt shoor rum is good for donkeys. U bedder has dis parfait insted. Reply to this comment mary O'Spockn June 7th, 2008 at 4:38 am yess! adn WaffuLs! wantz p’cahns in dose? Reply to this comment kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 3:04 pm Awwww….u gais is watchin owt furr me…. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Why, yes…I wud lub sum parfait…an peecanny waffulls!! Doan wurree, I is stayin way frum dat bad ole rum! (Butt I can has an e-sniff, rite?) I has a littul present furr u, Mary O… kidsturncentral.com/cards/jun7-8868913374.htm *snurts and runs* (Comments wont nest below this level) no 1 in particular June 7th, 2008 at 4:30 pm *bebbeh kitteh* hmm…*kureeus bebbeh kitteh eyez* dare ai? izzit gud foar liddlol kiddletz tew seez?…*bebbeh kitteh wunderz*…shud ai go ask momcat, oar shud ai ask auntee kafleen…hmm…ai willz git it strayt frum teh donkeez mowf. Ohai, Auntee kafleen! iz teh linkee sayf foar kureeus kittenz lyk mee tew see? kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 4:59 pm Oh, hevvens, YES! Is safee furr a 4 y.o.!! U cans go looky! Butt doan tell! Is funnee secret! Let Mary O find out!! *gigguls sneekilee* no 1 in particular June 7th, 2008 at 5:16 pm :shock: snerk! :lol: mary O'Spockn June 7th, 2008 at 6:09 pm AAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCK!! dONKee! wy i otter… *wipesuptehdripses* *pondurz wot to dew* :cool: kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 7:10 pm BWAHAHAHHAHAAHAHH!!!!!!! (onlookers , there is a better clicky link below dat Janet has so thotfullee provided) bamahern June 7th, 2008 at 7:11 pm weighty minnits! summuvuz dumt leik that keind uv theengz http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aM_0qZTeAjI bamahern June 7th, 2008 at 7:37 pm i doughnut leikz fingz whut goez “Sploodgy-splat” tehy sai harm kan kum 2 a yung mann keik taht! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aM_0qZTeAjI bamahern June 7th, 2008 at 7:48 pm wuz phunny einz - phunny twicet Reply here JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 6:35 pm LOL!! Kafleen!! http://www.kidsturncentral.com/cards/jun7-8868913374.htm ai hope this werks - then no wun has to copy n’ payste! (Comments wont nest below this level) kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 7:11 pm Tanks, Janet! :P Reply here mary O'Spockn June 7th, 2008 at 4:37 am stagehandden- yew givs POPTARTS & hotCHOKLIT?? hmmmm. dere’s sum stagehands i noes wot needs sum trainin frum you! Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 5:50 am er. prop-tart sry. one who handles or works props. Reply to this comment mary O'Spockn June 7th, 2008 at 6:13 am i likes my vershun better! Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 6:17 am I would preferr your version as well. tastee Reply to this comment kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 3:26 am Sumbodee sed dat? How crass. Dat deserves a bonk over the head and the DUH AWARD OF THE YEAR. I have never seen such festivities on here and I guess I’ve been coming here about a year or more now. It was better than I could have dreamed. And it wasn’t even that one thread. People were getting started the night before. Who cares, indeed? An the answer is…EBBREEWUN! BWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA! Reply to this comment Kayjoy June 7th, 2008 at 8:58 am i luvs mr. tinycarrot thanx,s.t.e.n.d. Reply to this comment lunarmommy June 7th, 2008 at 3:19 pm yes, taht wuz verry kyoot. mr. tinycarrot :) Reply to this comment kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 4:22 pm Aw….s.t.e.n.d. sed sumteeng cyoooote!!!! ooooooh, owr pweshuss stendee wendee made a cyoooteee!!! *rubs stend’s hed* issunt dat juss sooooo sweeeeeet???? Dat jusss meks mee wunt too gib stend a Grate! Big! Smoo- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA :arrow: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THAT WAS THE SOUND OF A DONKEY HAVING ITS @$$ KICKED OFF A CLIFF. /back to our regularly scheduled programming. Reply to this comment JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 2:51 am OOOPS!!! Manee dansing Conga Ratz to YOOO, sombra!! cSmall iz designing VEREEE speshul costyooms fur tehm!! But ai dont think tehy ar waring tehm today yet! ;) Reply to this comment Daisy the Curly Cat June 7th, 2008 at 12:01 am Hare, hare! Reply to this comment sombra June 7th, 2008 at 12:03 am Cogratulations! Hoppy Caturdai! Reply to this comment Daisy the Curly Cat June 7th, 2008 at 12:07 am Concatulatulashuns to yoos! Reply to this comment gibbocat June 7th, 2008 at 12:30 am Welkum 2 teh Tybooteek awn diz awspishus Caturdai!! Concatchewlacez and chilld choklit martooneez 4 yew awl! Reply to this comment Lyanthya June 7th, 2008 at 12:03 am Congratshoelaces, somba an Daisy! Whut drink an dans yu wunt? Reply to this comment sombra June 7th, 2008 at 12:06 am Haz tu bee karut jus and the Bunny Hop! Reply to this comment Lyanthya June 7th, 2008 at 12:17 am Ob korse! Heer am sum karut joos! *dansdansdans* Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 1:14 am damnit, earwurm. gonna have this one all day…… da, de, da-da-da-da, hop hop hop Reply to this comment Tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 12:14 am Wh00t!! Wh00t!!! Ohai Lyantha :grin: Is yoo recubbered frum the trip akross teh pond? Reply to this comment Ambercat June 7th, 2008 at 12:33 am Ooh, Lyantha is a Britpeep nao! An can joyn teh Ex-clue-sieve band ob Caturdai Mornin, furst-posters. We is fyoo but we is imp or tent - we yooshully start teh Big Brekfast…..Ai’s got Appul juse Baycon (Inglish baycon!) Crumpets D… Reply to this comment Tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 12:36 am Donuts Eggs-any way Fried bred G.. Reply to this comment Ambercat June 7th, 2008 at 12:49 am Ginniss - cos Ly is in Iesland Hunny Iescreem J… Reply to this comment Tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 1:00 am Jellied eels Krakkers Lemmun Curd M.. Reply to this comment Ambercat June 7th, 2008 at 1:05 am Ai’s nawt commin too yur haus for brekfast! Marmyt Nutella Orinjes P… Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 1:11 am PG Tips (good tea) Quite a runny egg (with soldiers) Raisin Scone Sausages (at yr own risk) T… Reply to this comment martoonie June 7th, 2008 at 1:17 am Toste Um….. let’s moov awn to Very crispee bakun W… Reply to this comment mugglemary June 7th, 2008 at 1:39 am watery porrige xtra krispee bakun yellow jello zesty (brand name) saltines Reply to this comment JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 2:24 am LOL!!! Ai wud laik to com fur brekfast!! but Tidmum???? Jellied eelz?? Ar yoo shur?? An Ambercat - marmite?? Ai - purrsonally - hav nebber taysted it, not ebe n smeeled it. But it certainly “gort” the pleh revues frum just about ebreebuddee! But.. .sumwun must laik it, oar tehy wudn’t bee selling it! Iz taht sumone- YOO??? :D Reply to this comment Phillipe d'Beaker June 7th, 2008 at 2:27 am ohai Janet — ai am sorry ai disappeared last night (my time) during the big crisis wif the space-time inversion at the birfday party. Ai had to leave my office and cudn’t get back into internet connexsion until this morning. I posted something at the end of the birthday picture thread. It wuz certainly a fun and exciting party. I wuz glad to find this morning that yew had escaped the tornado. (Comments wont nest below this level) JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 2:48 am LOL!! Mee too! an ai know! Traing to hav an advenchur wehn wun ov teh major player iz at werk can bee REEEELLEEE trikee! But we sumhao - ai STILL dont know waht reelee happened there - an ai eggspect no wun duZ - managed to get ebreewun bak safelee. Eggscept Mary! Teh last ai saw - she still wudn’t eet teh chawklit! :D stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 2:51 am mary fight dirty, berry dirty Phillipe d'Beaker June 7th, 2008 at 3:56 am um, the wun that won’t eat chawkclit is MaisNon. Looks similar to our own MaisOui, but is different. Just like JanetNoYouCannotHasAnyKittehs, and the LolCatBenefactor, and otters. They seem to have recovered. MaisNon, non so much. hmmm. MaisNon June 7th, 2008 at 4:41 am *spoken with French accent* I do not understand why you people are this way. *genteel hrumph* Reply here kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 3:29 am *snurt* (Comments wont nest below this level) Phillipe d'Beaker June 7th, 2008 at 3:54 am hey!! kafleen!!! sum days ago (no, this is not a time-travel sichuashion, nawt to wurry) there was a picture called sumthing like “pocket fire fox” — little baby fox in a riding helmet. I left a message there, particularly relevant to your interests — had to do with an otter photo on the site where the baby fox photo came from. I’ve been waiting to see you out here at a conveneennt time to send a reminder. if you haven’t, you should go look. srsly. kthxbai smammie June 7th, 2008 at 4:01 am snert…Aye noa ob wut u speek… beri gud fotoz…Aye thawt ob Kafleen tu… kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 3:06 pm I saw dat odd littul donkee photo…dat wun? Dat wuz interesting… Reply here Tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 5:18 am Ay nawt cummin to my howse neever!!!! :lol: :lol: Jellied eels-PLEH!!!!! I puttid it down cuz iz a ‘delikassee’ in Iyreland an Skawtland an Lunnon Reply to this comment idansdansdans June 7th, 2008 at 5:33 am Heer Tidmum. I madid tihs lol a wile ago 4 owr cheezfrenz in TTI. I fink tihs is a gud tyme 4 it to make an appeerance. See wut U fink!!! http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=997346 Reply to this comment tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 11:54 am Haaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaa!!! Funneh !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I kin jess imagin himz eetin a makky D!!! :lol: Fanks idansdansdans!!! . Whispurs— himz nawt lib tew far frum heer. Camilla has a howse bowt 3 milols frum heer too. We sees her dribin arown sumtymes. Reply to this comment eeckthecat June 7th, 2008 at 11:59 am Wow….when did he turn into his father ???? Reply to this comment idansdansdans June 7th, 2008 at 3:23 pm *wispers* I fink we awl turn into owr parents….. Eeeek! (Comments wont nest below this level) kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 4:23 pm U meen I’m gonna grow a idansdansdans June 7th, 2008 at 4:35 pm Wut!? Wut!? Don’t kiip meh in suspinderz!!!! Wut??? Reply here Ambercat June 7th, 2008 at 8:51 am Yah but, tehy is awl heethurn playses (sry, Klolz an Ly’s Paul an Annipuss an enneewun els Ai’s forgetted) Reply to this comment tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 10:50 am :grin: Reply to this comment JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 11:36 am *ahem* Yoo furgette paws4thot (eben if he isn’t heer nao, ai hav teh ohai hoeps tath he mite com bak sumtime) an Kermette from Ireland (she’s still heer - she’s just moastlee lurkin! Thot we wudnt notiss she wuzn’t heer!!) - an annieluvprinties, hoo iz Scottish but lives, ai think, in Manchester. Am - - iz taht AWL????? Wai don’t we hav moar peepl frum teh heehurn playses! HELLLLLOOOOOOO OUT TEHRE!!! PEEPLE FRUM TEH HEETHURN PLAYSES!!1 WAI AREN’T YOO HEER????? Doo yoo think tath will doo eet???? :D Reply to this comment eeckthecat June 7th, 2008 at 11:43 am Iffin it duzznt,den teh peeps jus ain’t tryin to heer !!! (Comments wont nest below this level) JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 11:54 am Oh NOOOOOOOEEEESSSSS!!! Stoopee STOOPEE Wed Press just eated mai meessaj!!! tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 11:58 am *pats Dame Janet gentlee awn teh arm. Tehre tehre Janet. Hab a chokklit hob nob.* JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 12:05 pm OOOOO!! chokklit hob nob!!! Ai hasn’t scene wun ov those in a lawng teim! Yumm!! Ai think. Ai haz nebber had wun - but - lawng ago - ai think it wuz Sj an Ambercat, we had a hole big thing abawt teh hob nobs. ‘Twas verree funnee - but ai cudn’t find it nao. ;) JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 12:07 pm OH!! darn. ai ment :( tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 12:08 pm Wen Kenna wented tew Jermanee,she had tew tayke gifts fer teh Fambly she bissited. She took an assortment ob Ingerlish Bikkies,incloodin teh hob nobs an digestives. :grin: an sum Twynings Tea. JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 12:15 pm Ai LUVS teh Twynings Tea!! Sum yeers ago, wehn Canada still had teh Armee in Germanee an Frawnce, we wud go to teh Canadian PX an get bagz full ov awl kinds ov Twynings - fur reel cheep!! An teh Erl Grey iz mai moast favoriet - but iz must be blended in teh TTI! Teh awso blend it in Atlanta fur “Marry Can” taysts - an iz nawt neerlee so gud. Wehn ai furst cayme hoam, ai dint know tath, an cudden’t figure aut wai it taysted “nawt rite.” tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 12:25 pm I lubs Twynings Earl Grey :grin: Iz so delicat an refreshing. We gots Twynings Everyday Tea at teh momunt. Tea an Shortbread Mnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn drooooooooollllllll!!! eeckthecat June 7th, 2008 at 12:28 pm Shortbread…nommmmm! Ai finks ai haz awl teh ingreedients to mayke sum…. Iz too hawt to bayke,tho. tidmum June 7th, 2008 at 12:32 pm Yoo needs a hansum yung neerlee nekkid fan boy or a Punkah Wallah tewkeep yoo cool inna kichin.-But mebbee yoo will get a bit hot an bovvered if hansum neerlee nekkid men be in teh kichin? :wink: eeckthecat June 7th, 2008 at 12:35 pm 8) (hope teh smilee werks…ai jus lernded how!) JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 12:43 pm mebbee??? mebbee hot an bovvered with the neerlee nekkid men in teh kichin???? LOL!!! Wif a fan? But eecktc iz rite. It iz kwite hawt - an verree hewmid heer! Teh fans. . .we hav. Teh hansum neerlee nekkid men? Nope!! :( eeckthecat June 7th, 2008 at 12:50 pm Oh,wells….ai will haf to make do wif jus 4 floofy kittehs….iz(almos) as gud!! idansdansdans June 7th, 2008 at 3:28 pm Nearlee nekkid yung gai in kitchen iz fine.. Mai frendz hubbi jus’ retyred an she sais itz like habbin a piano in teh kichen!! :lol: Reply here JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 12:02 pm Ai trais again! *sigh* *beeg breth!* OK IF yoo counts part peeple, tehn there ar menee moar! Ai maiself an !/4th Irish, gibbocat iz, ai think - 1/4th eech Irish/Scottish/Ingerlish/an Welsh. Iz Wales a heethrun playce??? Taht wud meen he iz awnlee 1/4th civilizeded! LOL!! An jimmba iz 1/4th Skawtish. An there must bee menee moar!!! Purrrhaps tehy will nao bee coming aut ov teh woodwerk!! ;) (Comments wont nest below this level) catsablanca June 7th, 2008 at 2:20 pm Mee tew, mee tew!! 1/8th Irish awn Momcat’s syde nd 1/8th Irish awn Dadcat’s syde, sew Ai’m 1/4 Irish. Momcat’s syde iz frum County Wicklow. Ai gotz tew bisit Iyreland lazt yaer….5 daes jest wuzn’t lawng enuf (neiver wuz 2 daes en Lundun). Newgrange (ober 5000 yrs owld) wuz (fur lak ob a beddur frase) totully awsum!!! Reply here Moppel June 7th, 2008 at 12:32 am thro next egg, plz. Reply to this comment ScotchAndMoreScotch June 7th, 2008 at 12:59 am wate.. wate… i swarez i haz to sneez but it wont kome owt. Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 1:12 am look at the light lil’ bunny Reply to this comment idansdansdans June 7th, 2008 at 2:25 am Pull a noze hare! Reply to this comment JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 7th, 2008 at 2:26 am LOL!!! HAO menee teims hav ai said taht!!! ??? ROFL!!! Well - nawt teh “lil’ bunny part!! :D Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 2:40 am yeah, the lite trick nebberr wurk fer mii Reply to this comment martoonie June 7th, 2008 at 3:45 am Mai sneezies is kummin owt. Hay feever - ai has it. Reply to this comment @_@ June 7th, 2008 at 1:12 am What @_@ Reply to this comment GenEX the Hareoic June 7th, 2008 at 1:27 am Pachi pachi pachi-desu! Reply to this comment ScotchAndMoreScotch June 7th, 2008 at 1:29 am i has a headake diiiiiis big, n is skreamin 4 xcederin Reply to this comment mugglemary June 7th, 2008 at 1:41 am teenee tinee bunnie eerz, teenee tinee bunnie paws, teenee tinee bunnie fase, uh oh s p l o r t ! Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 2:10 am first tiime deployment, lessee *klaxon* “We need CCC stat to obnox. kyoot bun-bun” sweep-sweep-sweeeeeeep scoop (gently) tippe-toe…………….and pour (wit care) gaff-tape (I am a stagehand after all) floofie black velvet blankie cuppa (your choice mary) wanna chockie? *whew* Reply to this comment fifi rockefeller June 7th, 2008 at 2:27 am Yur nawt-sekkund reskoo responze? Well done, sir. Didn’t miss any steps. Plz to be accepting this certificate of accomplishment to place in yur personnel file; it iz gud for 4 CEU’s. f.r. Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 2:42 am dank-u, I try, nod wandt to miss anydingk wazza CEU (cyoot emergency unit?) Reply to this comment fifi rockefeller June 7th, 2008 at 3:22 am CEU’s IRL are Continuing Education Units. You need a certain number each year to comply with licensing requirements. It helps to keep a professional “current” in their field with privacy laws, ethics, new techniques, CPR, state law updates, or business trends. . Did you see in Yahoo News somebody spelled it as “Educaiton” on 300+ high school diplomas? Somebuddy git me a lolspeek magnet! WANT! . Cyoot Emergencee Unit werks for me. Plz to add new entry in lolspeek dikshunairy? Kthxbai. f.r. Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 2:43 am maht need the CCC to remain on station, thaht is one dangerously cyoot bunneh. Reply to this comment Missy June 7th, 2008 at 3:00 am Yer rite Stagehanddan, it wud be hare-braynd to remoove CCC wen such kyoot is sew close…bettur re-charg it! Reply to this comment Annipuss June 7th, 2008 at 3:57 am Ai onlee just manijd 2 avoyd splortin bai puttin mai spaer hand on mai hedd. Reply to this comment cweenmj June 7th, 2008 at 8:02 am U haz a spare hand? *finking: left, rite, spare. Hmmmm. Cud kum in handee.* Reply to this comment idansdansdans June 7th, 2008 at 8:14 am *handee—snerk* Reply to this comment catsablanca June 7th, 2008 at 2:26 pm I fink Dan haz 3 handz: left, rite nd stage. Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 2:35 pm nice Reply to this comment catsablanca June 7th, 2008 at 6:06 pm Ai’ll bett a 3rd wun wuld coem en handee (noe pun ntended) en ur lyne ob werk. Reply to this comment mugglemary June 8th, 2008 at 12:44 am oh tankyooo berry mush stagehand, ai hads to leaf werk wiht mai brayns all over teh plays and hard to drive teh car taht way. Ai fink ai has a nice cuppa tihs yummy not merican tee and ai haves teh chockie bunniee ( it mus be ! ) Reply to this comment D.R. June 7th, 2008 at 2:17 am It’s a little early to rehearse for the Easter Parade, fella… Reply to this comment Salz June 7th, 2008 at 2:23 am My favourite lolcat evah! Reply to this comment Eleanor June 7th, 2008 at 2:51 am Bunneh’s rul teh whol pwanet!! Reply to this comment idansdansdans June 7th, 2008 at 2:57 am Hmmm…. I’m finkin taht mebee tihs pic iz frum teh cheezes ‘cawse tehy wuz wachin an sew prowd ov teh luving come unity tehy haz created. Nawt 2 menshun teh brillyant, wundrus an awsum birfdai party , given bai her loyal subjeks, 2 homur owr Grand Dame–JanetCanHas 4Kittehs.. *curtseez berry low* Reply to this comment poohbear3931 June 7th, 2008 at 3:06 am Mai sunkitteh iz @ unibursity at UEA (Norwich, in TTI). Teh campoos iz h00ge & full ofs teenie tinie wabbits like tihs wun! Tehy wuz doing an exp… epur… trying to see how to make lots’n'lots of lolwabbits 4 feeding teh hungwy people in teh wurld an teh wabbits escaped an did wot wabbits do best. Noa tehre be wabbits eberywhere. Wabbits in teh bar, wabbits digging up teh ziggurats (ziggurats iz fam00s @ UEA), wabbits in y00r hare… Reply to this comment martoonie June 7th, 2008 at 4:02 am Tehy was doin an egg spear mint to find owt how to make bunnies? An mai taxes are payin for dis? Dey only had to aks an ai wudda told tehm how bunnies is maded! Reply to this comment poohbear3931 June 7th, 2008 at 5:39 am Tihs wuz 4 feeding teh paw peeps in Per00 (so taht tehy doan hav 2 nom guineapiggies noa moor). Teh lolwabbits wuz in a speshul paddoky tihng butt tehy eskapedidid. Martoonie, how iz bunnehs maded? I’z not sh00re… Reply to this comment leosmom June 7th, 2008 at 9:10 am ai studiededed it in maffamatics class. They multiply. Reply to this comment stagehanddan June 7th, 2008 at 9:11 am or debide, and concore Reply to this comment catsablanca June 7th, 2008 at 2:28 pm *Snerk! Reply to this comment Ambercat June 7th, 2008 at 4:30 am do tehy still tell teh storee ob teh peep hoo droev a mini daon teh steps @UEA? Happened teh yeer Bfore mai big sis went tehre - a leg end ed lee. Reply to this comment poohbear3931 June 7th, 2008 at 5:33 am Tehy iz allus doin tihs kind of exper…eggsperi… trying t00 discubber wut will happenz wen teh cars an bicyclols an aeroplades goa downe teh steps an into teh funtane ~ spl00sh! Reply to this comment Spring June 7th, 2008 at 9:50 am sounds like tribbles…. Reply to this comment diva June 7th, 2008 at 4:13 am Standin obashun. I haz it. Reply to this comment F3nNec June 7th, 2008 at 4:35 am cyut! =D Reply to this comment @_@ June 7th, 2008 at 4:41 am Loik da lovlay ^.^ it hitz da bunie ^.^ Reply to this comment Sakee June 7th, 2008 at 4:51 am Mah brudda from anudda mudda jus splorted. Grooooss Reply to this comment LOLDemon June 7th, 2008 at 5:05 am N-kays n-e-wun wuz wunderin, lolbunz iz eekwulee kaypubul of kawzin teh hedsplortz. Liek sew. ::SPLORT!:: Reply to this comment Sakee June 7th, 2008 at 6:14 am Yipez! Kallz teh CCC! STAT! *Pickz up brayns and kleens dem. Putz dem in LOLDemon hed Tonz of duckytape Givz LOLDemon wrm blankee and lotz offa hot choklit* Better nau? Reply to this comment idansdansdans June 7th, 2008 at 6:27 am Gee wizzerz Sakee, gud fing U wuz close 2LOLdemon an hers dat cwiet “silent butt dedly”, splort! Grate job on teh brane fixin.. nise an kleen, too! Reply to this comment LOLDemon June 7th, 2008 at 7:48 am Fank u kaindleem Sakee. Betur maek dat coeld chawklit melk,tho; iz hawt owt tudey! Reply to this comment Kamilla June 7th, 2008 at 6:29 am KUH-YOOT!!!!!!! Reply to this comment CheshireKittehKat June 7th, 2008 at 8:19 am Sumeboddee snappeded teh foto ov tihs liddel bun-bun, hoo wuz syttyng unnotissed at Janet’s Birfdai partee; Hims wuz syttyng frunt rowe centre adn fureeuuslee klappyng hims floofee liddel pawses; kleerley hims wuz njoeying hisseylfe treemehnduuslee; A thotfull CheezePeep gibbed hims a playtefull ov greenes, karrots, lehtuss, kabbidge, adn cehlaree; hims wuz veree happee adn haddez a veree guud tiem!!! :lol: Reply to this comment kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 4:27 pm awwwwwwwww lots ub bunn bunns ebbreeware like dat….. {{{{{{dose bunn bunns}}}}}}}} If u noe wutt I mean. ♥ Reply to this comment CheshireKittehKat June 8th, 2008 at 10:56 am :lol: Reply to this comment Werdycnan June 7th, 2008 at 9:18 am *klapz fuzzy paws foar bunnehz proformanse!* YAY FOAR TEH BUNNEH! Reply to this comment diane June 7th, 2008 at 9:33 am me no use de language…..just want to say—-HOW CYOOOOOOOT!!!!!!! Reply to this comment Duffy June 7th, 2008 at 11:31 am Ohai Diane! Dis yr furst poste? Welcum!! Yu no need to tawk lolspeak - tho yu did pritty gud for no-kapeesh. If yu lieks teh littul lifes liek bunnehs an kittehs, we likes yu! Reply to this comment Duffy June 7th, 2008 at 11:34 am I thinks dis bunneh saw teh preeius pikshur and is applawdin. BECOS HE CANT VOTE WIS RAETBURGURS. Reply to this comment Grace June 7th, 2008 at 3:04 pm Wet mwe ientwodutce mieselp. I am a beig bwack kwitty kwat. I wike to miow. Miow, miow, miow… bow,wow. *Gasp* Mian… A’m speeekin’ doggie agaien. Awww… Whey mee???? Reply to this comment catsablanca June 7th, 2008 at 6:09 pm Bcuz ur bilingal! Taht’s bery speshul! Reply to this comment burfday fairy June 7th, 2008 at 3:23 pm wel, iz a bit late, but janet’s burfday parti yesturdae wuz so much fun it wud be fun to evreeday on teh not-sekond pikshur of teh day to sayz a HAPPEE BURFDAY!!1!! to all teh cheezfrenz an lolfrenz an eben teh lurkurs (an eben teh trollz) hoo habz burfdays taht day. so, late in teh day, let me say HAPPEE BURFDAY to ebreewun hoo haz teh burfday today!! (kant do teh confettiz, but heer’s a choklit cake :D ) Reply to this comment kafleen June 7th, 2008 at 4:25 pm Yesh. I wish I knew EBBREEBUDDEES birfday so I cud sillybrate dem all. :( Reply to this comment JanetCanHas4Kittehs June 8th, 2008 at 2:50 am O HAI burfday fairy!! *gigglol* Waht ai Beeyootiful avatar yoo have!! Look laik a fairy crown!! ;) Well - it DUZ!! An waht a gud Idea. an espeshullee fur teh deer lurkerz. Tehy say there ar HUNDREDS ov them - maybee THOUSANDS eben! An we cannawt know wehn they ar having teh birthday! An oh WOW!! Chonklit cake ebree day?????? OH mai. LOL!! Ai furgot!! Teh chonklit caeks heer - speshulle those wif teh buttercreeem frosting - hav NO caloreez. Zip! None!! nada! Teh beeg zero!! Let teh sillee brayting begin!!! {{{{burfday fairy}}}} Reply to this comment Spartan117 June 7th, 2008 at 4:54 pm Lol the clappity clappity thing made me laugh =P Reply to this comment bamahern June 7th, 2008 at 7:24 pm phunnie komments about katz = sryius comenz about janet perty shur iz teh saem fing.. Reply to this comment Kevin June 8th, 2008 at 9:35 am I’m in your field, picking my nose Reply to this comment Katzo June 9th, 2008 at 2:10 am ZOMG!BUNNYSOCUTE! SPLORT! Reply to this comment Melissa June 9th, 2008 at 10:11 am Credut for teh pitchur shud go to: Tanja Askani Reply to this comment Sandy June 9th, 2008 at 2:56 pm Clappity Clappity!! LOL So cute and so funny. :D Reply to this comment HANNAH June 15th, 2008 at 12:22 pm AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW Reply to this comment Animol July 5th, 2008 at 2:11 pm 2 cute 2 b tru Reply to this comment Jackie July 11th, 2008 at 10:05 pm In tight competitonz with gerbil has donut for cuteist evah. Reply to this comment

What is your zodiac sign? Does any of this describe you? Aries Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses. Taurus You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God. Gemini Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius. Cancer You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans Leo You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls. Virgo You are a pain in the ***. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ***. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo. Libra You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all. Scorpio You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it. Sagittarius Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip. Capricorn Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ***. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's cockeyed system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns Aquarius The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians. Pisces Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your *** and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want. I am Aries, I must say I do resemble some of these remarks. I'm always bumping my head & I can relate to Hard Headed Women by Cat Stevens and I won't bring a knife to a gun fight :) ENJOY!

Homemade halloween costumes ideas (look or else) muhaha!? Here are some of (SOME) of my homemade halloween costume ideas for one person and groups! ENJOY (OR ELSE) Btw hope yall have a happy halloween One person costumes: 1. Ghost Don’t just stick the sheet over your head! Instead, cut a neck hole from an old sheet and wear it over your body. Take a second sheet, and drape and pin it (like a toga) to add a floaty, ghostly flair. Powder your face and your hair white, and drape light chains over your shoulders. 2. Witch To make a witch’s hat from poster board, cut one large circle for the brim, then cut out the space where the head will fit. Cut another large circle, and cut a slit into the center of the circle. Also cut one-inch slits all around the outside of the circle to make tabs. Wrap this circle around to make a cone, then attach the cone to the brim with the tabs (use masking tape to hold the tabs). Spray paint the entire hat black. Wear black flowing clothes and striped leggings. 3. Mummy Cut strips of off-white fabric, like muslin or cheesecloth, and wrap around the arms, legs, body, and head, but make sure the mummy can see and breathe! 4. Zombie Take any old clothes and distress them by fraying the edges and dusting with talcum powder. Pick a theme---you could be a zombie groom, cheerleader, or waitress. 5. Skeleton Using white or glow-in-the-dark fabric paint, paint a skeleton onto black sweats. Use face paints to make your face look like a skull. 6. Vampire Wrap a large piece of dark velvet around your neck for a cape. Pin in place with an old brooch. Wear dark clothes in romantic fabrics like crushed velvet and satin. 7. Cat Start with a leotard and tights. Make a tail by stuffing a tube of fabric. Ears are easy to make from a headband and cardboard. You can also use fake fur for the ears and tail or to trim the leotard. Use face paint to make your eyes look cat-like and to add whiskers. 8. Dog Add felt spots to a white or brown sweatsuit. Make floppy dog ears out of felt, and hot glue them to a headband. Paint a puppy dog face, complete with a big spot around one eye, to complete the costume. 9. Bumblebee or Ladybug Paint poster board to look like the body and wings of a bumblebee or ladybug. Wear with leotard and tights to match, and attach wires to a headband for antennae. 10. Butterfly Sew two long pieces of bright, shimmery fabric down the back of a long-sleeved leotard. Sew the other end of each piece to the underside of a sleeve, so that when you lift your arms, your wings flutter out. Add antennae. 11. Spider Wear black clothes. Make six tubes of black fabric, and sew three on each side of your shirt or leotard. Tie each set of three legs together with strings, and attach the strings to your shirt sleeves so that when you move your arms, all of your legs move, too. 12. Nun A nun’s habit is a basic black tunic (a shapeless dress with long sleeves). If you have a sewing machine, then you can make a tunic! Look online for patterns. Add a white collar to the habit. Then, measure a strip of white poster board to fit around your head, and hot glue black fabric to this strip. Bobby-pin the poster board to your hair. 13. Friar or Monk Make a brown tunic, and wrap a simple rope around the waist. 14. Lady in Waiting Make a simple, velvet tunic dress, or look in thrift stores for a long-sleeved, floor-length, dress. Wrap gold cording under the bustline to create an Empire waist, and crisscross the cording in front. Make a cone hat (like for the witch’s hat, only leave off the brim), and attach a translucent scarf to the top of the hat. 15. Fairy Make a short, sleeveless tunic in a light, flowing fabric, or wear a leotard and a tulle skirt (which you can make by stitching gathered tulle to a strip of elastic). You can make wings by bending coat hangers into the desired shape and covering with white pantyhose. Tie the wings to the body by crossing in front and wrapping under the bustline. 16. Angel Make a short, sleeveless tunic dress, similar to the fairy’s, or wear light, flowing clothes. Make a halo from tinsel garland. Follow the fairy directions for wings. 17. Devil Sculpt horns from papier mache or plaster of paris strips (you can find this in any craft or hobby store). Attach these to a headband with additional papier mache or plaster of paris strips, and paint red. You can also make a pitchfork from the same material, and attach to a wooden dowel or a broomstick handle. 18. Fairy Godmother Begin with an existing secondhand prom dress or any shiny, sparkly skirt and a leotard. Then gather fabric (tulle, satin, or any shimmery material) around your waist, and stitch or staple it so that it drapes down the skirt. Create a wand and a crown from any stiff paper, and decorate with paint, rhinestones, sequins, and glitter. 19. Statue of Liberty Use light green fabric to make a toga. Make the crown from cardboard. For her torch, use a toilet paper tube painted to match the fabric, and glue red and orange tissue paper to the top for flames. 20. Roman Athlete Wear a toga, and make a laurel wreath from fake leaves. Wear plain sandals, or try spray painting sandals gold and crisscrossing gold cord around your legs. 21. Father Time Cut a sickle out of cardboard and spray paint it silver. Glue it onto a long wooden rod (like a broom handle). Wear a black toga, and carry the sickle and a clock or an hourglass. 22. Mother Nature Wear a neutral-toned, long-sleeved leotard and tights. Drape shimmering, translucent blue and green fabric like a toga and safety pin to the leotard. Attach fake flowers and leaves to the draped fabric, and tuck a few flowers behind your ear. 23. Caveman or Cavewoman Make a toga from animal print fabric. Cut the edges into jagged points. Carry a club. 24. Bobby Soxer A poodle skirt is easy to make from a large piece of felt. Cut a large circle, and then cut out the waist to fit. Sew elastic to the inside of the waist, and hem the bottom. Then make the poodle (or any other shape) out of felt, and glue to the skirt with fabric glue. Use pompoms and rickrack to decorate. Wear with a simple blouse, a scarf around the neck, saddle shoes, and white socks, and pull your hair into a ponytail. 25. Flapper Begin with a basic shift dress, and use fabric glue to attach fringe in layers, or you can simply wear a pretty slip and a string of fake pearls. To make the flapper headpiece, cut a length of sequined elastic to fit snugly around your head, then stitch the ends together. Use craft glue to add a feather. Finish the costume with fishnet stockings and heels. 26. Tourist Wear a tacky, Hawaiian print shirt, khaki shorts, sandals with socks, sunglasses, and a camera around your neck. 27. Beauty Pageant Queen Make a sash from satin, and use glitter paint to write your title on the sash. Wear an old formal or prom dress and a tiara (or make your own crown from cardboard and plastic jewels). Carry a bouquet of fake roses. 28. Jailbird Paint white stripes on a black sweatshirt and sweatpants. Make a ball and chain by wrapping bunched-up newspaper in papier mache or plaster of paris strips and painting it black when it dries, then use strips of cardboard (painted black) for the chain. 29. Rag Doll Wear old, baggy clothes and striped tights. Stitch or safety pin squares of rags to your costume for patches. Make two long braids from red yarn and sew to the inside of an old hat. 30. Scarecrow Wear a flannel shirt and overalls, and stuff the ends of the sleeves and pant legs with straw. Top with an old porkpie hat. 31. Swashbuckler or Pirate Wear tight black pants tucked into black boots and a white, peasant-style top. Make a cape by wrapping any fabric around your shoulders and pinning with an old brooch. Cut cardboard into a sword and spray paint it or wrap in tin foil. 32. Gypsy Wear layered, colorful, flowing garments. Tie a scarf around your hair, and wear large hoop earrings, jangly bracelets, and a chunky costume necklace. Carry a deck of cards to tell fortunes. 33. Mermaid Begin with nude-colored leotard and fishnet tights. Wrap a long piece of shimmery material around your waist---it should trail on the floor behind you---and stitch it together in the front. Cut the fabric that trails on the floor into a fish-tail. If you can find two large plastic shells, use low-temp hot glue to attach these over your leotard. If not, then cut shell shapes out of the same shimmery fabric. Accessorize with plastic seaweed (the kind used in fish tanks) and fishnet. 34. Bellydancer Add sequined elastic, fringe, and beads to an existing bra or bikini top. Wear a coordinating skirt and sandals. 35. Hula Dancer A grass skirt is easy to make! At a craft store, purchase green and brown raffia, and staple it in bunches to a long strip of fabric. Wear a brightly colored, flowered bathing suit, and wrap the grass skirt around your waist. String fake flowers to make a lei. 36. Cabaret Dancer Wear a black leotard, fishnet tights, and heels. Make a showgirl-style headpiece by cutting a half circle from cardboard. Attach this firmly to a headband with masking tape. Paint the entire half circle (front and back) black, and cover with black glitter. Hot glue three long peacock feathers to the back of the half-circle. Don’t forget the red lipstick! 37. Superhero Wear sweatpants and a sweatshirt in your superhero’s colors (or make up your own superhero). Make the superhero’s logo from felt, and glue it to the sweatshirt. Make an easy cape by wrapping a piece of fabric around your shoulders; hold it together with safety pins. 38. Clown Wear bright, oversized clothes, like plaid pants, a striped shirt, suspenders, and a large bowtie. Look in thrift stores for a pair of shoes that is way too big, then put one of your own pair of shoes inside the oversized pair so that you can wear them without falling over. Clown costumes can also be made from old band or baton twirler costumes, western wear, and secondhand suits (think hobo!). See the Rag Doll directions on how to make a yarn wig. 39. Jack-in-the-box Cut armholes and legholes from a large box, and decorate the box to look like a jack-in-the-box. Leave the top of the box completely open, and make “suspenders” for the box by cutting long strips of bright fabric and stapling them firmly. Attach large pompoms to a long-sleeved, brightly colored shirt and wear striped leggings or tights. Add a jester’s hat and clown makeup. 40. Robot Use a large box, and cut arm, leg, and neck holes. Spray paint the box silver, and use pipe cleaners, wire, and tin foil to make dials and other robot parts. Make a tin foil hat, and add wires for antennae. 41. Television Cut out the front of the box to make a television screen. Cut a neck hole in the bottom of the box, and wear the box on your head. Use pipe cleaners to make antennae. Dress as a newscaster and carry a microphone to be a “talking head”. 42. Lego Piece Take two circular cardboard boxes (you can find these in a craft or hobby store), and attach them with masking tape to the large box. Cut holes for your arms, legs, and neck, and spray paint the entire box a bright color. 43. Gift Cover a large box in wrapping paper, and add a large bow (or wear the bow on your head). Cut holes for your arms, legs, and neck. 44. Animal in a Pet Store Start with any animal costume, like a cat or a dog. Using a craft knife, carefully cut strips out of a large refrigerator box to create a cage. Cut leg holes out of the bottom, and spray paint the entire box metallic silver. Attach a sign to the “cage” that says “Kittens 4 Sale” or “Puppies 4 Sale”. 45. Bug Caught In Spider’s Web Start with your desired insect costume. Make a large web by tying and knotting white rope or yarn. Attach this web to the back of your costume---make sure to attach it to your arms and legs so that you seem stuck in the web. 46. Person Taking a Bath Cut leg holes in a large, plastic tub. Glue cotton balls (for bubbles) all around the top of the tub, and attach a small rubber ducky to the side. Wear a nude-colored leotard and tights and a shower cap, and carry a scrub brush. 47. Playing Card Take two large pieces of poster board. Set the two pieces on top of each other and punch one hole about six inches from both corners. Use heavy yarn, rope, or fabric to tie the two pieces of poster board together. Paint both sides of a sandwich board to look like a playing card, such as the Queen of Hearts (add a crown and wear red underneath) or a Joker (add a jester’s hat and wear brightly colored clothes). 48. Clock Follow the directions for the playing card, only cut the two pieces of poster board into circles and paint to look like a clock’s face. You could also add movable hour and minute hands by cutting these shapes out of additional poster board and attaching in the center. Wear brown or black clothes underneath. 49. Fried Egg or Deviled Egg Begin with a white sheet, and paint a large yellow circle in the center (or glue on a circle from yellow felt). Cut holes for your arms and neck. Add horns and a pitchfork to be a deviled egg. 50. Spaghetti and Meatballs Take a brown or red sheet, and use fabric glue to stick on large red or brown pompoms (for the meatballs). Cut holes for your arms and neck. The stringy part of a mop (a new one) becomes the spaghetti---using low-temp hot glue, attach it to the inside of a plastic bowl, and wear the bowl on your head. Group costumes: (numbers take to long) spa girl. Ancient Egyptians and mummies. cows and milk maids (may be embarcing i guess or funny..) M n M's (it would be kewl if u actually had some m n m's wit u ) the Flintstones The adam's family old school 70's basketball team Village People The Simpsons door to door salesmen (lol) Wizard of Oz prisoners chained to each other Fred, Shaggy and the gang of Scooby Doo group of '80s flick horror film murders; freddy krueger, jason voorhees, Halloween guy, texas chainsaw guy, etc....THE SCREAM TEAM!! Superheros flight attendents skittles cowgirls One of you could be a babysitter and the rest "babys" Fanta Girls ALICE IN WONDERLAND BARBIES plug and socket dead cheerleaders chess peices pirates of the carribean Bacon & Eggs Traffic Lights Fork and Spoon handcuffs cards (hearts , diamonds ,spades, clubs.) girl sailors ghostbusters dukes of harrards looney tunes justice legue go-go girls nuns hair stylists one of you be a rock star the rest have cameras and all firewoman peramedic police the jetsons beauty queens ( everyone with a differant state) Sardines the incredibles cruela deavil ( 101 dalmations get some people to be a dalemation and someone to be cruela deavil) prom queen ( rly only for one but...have people take some pictures of u..) Comments are fine , but if you have nothing nice to say like em your better off putting a flower pot on ur head please don't say it .. am not looking for ideas but you can post them for other people! ~.~ No..... am not THAT old.. lolm i just noticed how alot of people need halloween ideas , and they don't have the money . So one weekend ( i was in school so one weekend ) i just did this for fun!

What is your horoscope sign...? Do any of these characteristics apply to you? Aries Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses. Taurus You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God. Gemini Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius. Cancer You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans Leo You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls. Virgo You are a pain in the ***. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ***. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo. Libra You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all. Scorpio You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it. Sagittarius Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip. Capricorn Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ***. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's ******** system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns Aquarius The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians. Pisces Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your *** and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want. I am a Leo. I love automated opening doors and nothing would give me more pleasure than to have Clappers applaud me when I enter a room. I must admit I am an attention seeking person. ENJOY!

What do you think of my short story? Disclaimer: It's a little inappropriate. And not grammatically correct in all places. Yes, it does change tenses about half way through. Mainly for my comfort. Be critical and constructive. Thanks chaps. So, I’m in love. Usually after that sentence comes a lengthy explanation over-stuffed with clichés about roses and deep reds. No doubt, you know the drill. However, this love story is just a bit odd. It’s fucked up. If I want to be completely honest with myself, which I do, it’s obviously beyond fucked up. It’s a hot mess pushed over the edge of social acceptance. Somehow, I prefer it that way. Before we get to whispering sweet nothings in the ear of said lover, we have to go back to how this awkward event occurred. Back before it, when I took normalcy for granted. I was a partially normal angsty teenager that thought that love is cheap way of rationalizing sexual behavior. Love is just a pretty lie. I drank. Drank myself silly. And made love. If that’s even what you would call it. I was never a stranger to sex or the cheap feelings it left in my gut. Boys like my girlish curves and slightly pointed nose. My favourite place was in a car. Where the steam could swirl and the windows could fog. I think I liked the thick air. I liked it when I was out of breath and most of all I liked the physical steamy glass to prove that I had cheated love. I had cheated the system of meet, date, kiss, love, marriage, sex, children, death. My parents were totally oblivious. My father would call me his pretty baby. Even after I puked in the passenger seat of his sparkly red Ford. I was wasted and trying to be the intelligent person I had thought myself to be, I decided not to drive home. I’d just sleep in the truck my Daddy would let me borrow. I guess I woke in the dead of night and spit my guts out.. I can’t quite remember. I just remember waking up in them. My drinking and excessive partying would eventually reach peak towards the end of my Junior year in High School. It was a small town and alcohol was easy to get. I drank every night and partied every weekend. Sometimes, I’d even go to class drunk. And sit and spin in my stupidity. I was a star pupil, as you could probably guess. I was the kid no one would even try to talk to because they could smell my booze breath from a mile away. So that faithful night began with me locking my keys in the red Ford and walking home from school, which was a good ten miles away from my house. I was shuffling down the dirt road when I passed a double wide bumping with popular music. Not music I liked, but it still caught my attention. I found myself at the front door of the house within minutes. I still can’t remember how or why I decided that approaching an unknown party was a good idea. But I clearly decided it would be okay. It was miraculous as it turns out. I opened the door and peeked inside to see at least a dozen kids drooped lazily over torn furniture passing a large green glass bong around. They were already pretty far gone. There was a football player with dashing looks and pretty hairs. I’d always wanted him. More just to say that I got to see his junk, but secretly, deep down I knew I wanted to make love with him. Serious love that would lead to an actual relationship. But don’t tell anyone that. That’s not my style. That’s not the way I roll. There were also a few clone kids with messy hair and flannel shirts. I’d fucked two of the three. The rest of the kids were clear trouble makers none of which I actually knew. I nodded my head towards them and took my place in the circle. It was fantastic. I was going to get fucked up. Thank god. Thank fucking god I left my keys in the truck. After about forty five minutes of heavy smoking, out came the booze. The sweet booze. The lovely, fragrant, delicious friend of mine. There was a handle of cheap vodka. Greg, one of the flannels that I fucked, knew I wasn’t the biggest fan of vodka. He whispered to his fellow flannel. His friend nodded and chuckled as he pulled out a Gatorade bottle full of whiskey. By this time I’m sure my mouth was watering. I had one of two options for this lucky night: One; drink all the whiskey and some of the vodka and get messed the fuck up, or Two; get just drunk enough to get me going and seduce Mr. Athletic to fuck my brains out. I sipped happily on my special Gatorade as I mulled over my options. Once I started to feel my brains slosh in my skull, I knew I was drunk. Funny, I remember looking at the whiskey and realizing it was still half full. I couldn’t figure out how I got so drunk so fast. But by this time was eyeing Mr. Football and licking my lips. He’d glance over and smile. I unbuttoned the top button of my blouse and stroked the edge of it. I’m sure little drunk me showing my cleavage got him terribly aroused. I shuffled out of the living room into one of the bedrooms. A flannel boy’s no doubt. It was covered in band posters and smelled like a dead cat.

What is your zodiac sign...? Does any of this describe you? Aries Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses. Taurus You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God. Gemini Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius. Cancer You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans Leo You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls. Virgo You are a pain in the ***. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ***. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo. Libra You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all. Scorpio You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it. Sagittarius Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip. Capricorn Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ***. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's cockeyed system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns Aquarius The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians. Pisces Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your *** and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want.

What's your zodiac sign? (Is this true about you)? I’m a Sagittarius!! Damn fucking TRUE! Aries Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses. Taurus You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God. Gemini Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius. Cancer You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans Leo You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls. Virgo You are a pain in the ass. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ass. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo. Libra You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all. Scorpio You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it. Sagittarius Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip. Capricorn Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ass. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's cockeyed system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns Aquarius The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians. Pisces Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your ass and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want.

How many of these are true for anime lovers? You call your dog Shinji. You perform a canon ball dive into a pool while yelling "Spirit Bomb!" Your house has an anime room. You and your friends flash peace signs and take girlish poses when you are happy. You get an anime tattoo even though you're scared of needles. Your walls are covered in wallscrolls and posters from your favorite series. If you use the term "kawaii" for describing everything. You try to convince your girlfriend that "cat ears" and "tail" really looks good on them. You can sing songs from your favorite shows, in Japanese, even though you dont speak Japanese... You spent hours looking through your library for a copy of "The Universe of Four Gods" You have legally changed your name to that of your favorite charcter. You wear a necklace and fall down every time someone says "sit boy." You insist on having an entrance that includes spotlights, music, and raining cherry blossoms (while you hold a rose if you're a guy). Your only dream is to attend Tokyo U with a girl you haven't seen in 15 years. You play an instrument and you nickname it Inuyasha For Valentines Day you buy a stuffed dog and make up your own Japanese name for it. You get mad at your teacher and draw a picture of her as an anime demon cat. You watch Iron Chef constantly to pick up great recipes. You've bought a twenty dollar ring in the shape of a dragon to show off at school. You always have your hair covering your left eye and always fliping it so you look like an anime character. You think that falling flat on your back with your legs in the air is a normal reaction to big news. You are worried because you don't have several desirable members of the opposite sex frantically trying to make you fall in love with them. You shave a cresent moon onto your cat's head, dye the cat purple, then take it to school and insist it's Luna, your talking cat. You go around town trying to eat donuts and act all crazy-like, all the while saying you're Vash the Stampede. To resolve a conflict, you insist on a duel. The employees at Gamestop know you, and tell you when you walk in if they've gotten a new shipment of anime DVDs. You've gotten angry at someone and placed two fingers on your forehead shouted the word "Makanekasopo!" (special beam cannon or light of death) and then poked them in the eye. You waste countless amounts of hair gel to get that "Goku look." You map out points in Tokyo where the Dragons of Earth might attack. You believe it is possible for a person to be severly beaten in the head with a large hammer, stick, etc...and still come out alive. You have a moment of confusion whenever you go to school because there are no girls in those tiny little skirts that come with their school uniform. You yell out 'Baka hanyou Inu-Yasha!' at your birthday party and everyone (except your parents) knows you're talking to your boyfriend. You tell your parents you need to stay out past curfew to save the colonies. Each time you see a stray animal, you turn your hat sideways and throw one of those plastic Pokeballs Burger King was giving out in their kids' meals yelling, "POKEBALL, GO!" You add "no da" to the end of all statements you make. The majority of your CDs are Japanese or the English version of a Japanese soundtrack or the English soundtrack of an anime that just decided that it would use English in its songs. You misplace your manga and someone at school you don't even know gives it to you saying they knew it was yours. You incorporate Japanese, somehow, into every class. You use random Japanese words such as baka, kawaii, and hentai. You try to read every book from right to left. You take a break from watching anime to go to your computer (nicknamed Lord Conti) to download anime (for previewing purposes only! ;) ), while visiting your favorite anime forum, while listening to Japanese webradio... You call your parents Okaa-san and Otou-san. You say ITADAKIMASU!! before you eat your meals. You think that locket your boyfriend gave you will turn you into a magical girl. You'll risk grounding to get a good new fanfic. You constantly say "w00p" after almost every sentance. You insist on chopsticks for everyday use. Your bookshelf is filled with anime box sets and no books. You stop listening to the radio because English makes no sense to you anymore and it's your first spoken language. You call yourself "otaku." All of your family portraits have been altered to the proper super large eye size. Random battles seem to erupt wherever you go. You take the time to write messages on your cigarettes, only to burn them right away. Your dreams are animated. You Naru-punch all the guys at school, and then wonder why they don't follow you around like Keitaro follows Naru. You hold your eyes really wide all day trying to make them stay big Duct tape is really funny to you and [note]--> i did not make these up these are from a group on facebook "you know you're addicted to anime when..." and i just thought it was funny since many of these are true for me ^---^ GAH sorry it got cut off: and most of your threats involve taping people to walls. When you're washing dishes you yell out "SUPAH WAVE SMASHUH!" or any water attack. You run out of space on your computer because the hard drive is taken up by hundreds of anime pics, mp3s, midis, and music videos. You spend all night trying to figure out how many people you can get to go in with you on buying the complete collection of Sailor Moon episodes in Japanese. You spend your whole spring break working on an anime webpage. You expect to see a sweatdrop over someone's head when they get embarressed. You start to speak with an odd accent. You can watch two animes in the same room at the same time and still have the TV off. You know your favorite character's bloodtype. Knowing Sailor Moon helps you on an Astronomy test. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends who are addicted to anime.

How many receipt-less voting machines are used nation-wide? Search:GEMS Diebold optical scan machines are being rigged for Bush Skull & Bones connection of Bush & Kerry: "Our Side (Race) won" Fraternity News (www.wikipedia.com_skull_and_bones) Poll Tapes thrown away - Against Federal Law (must be kept for 22 mos. by law) Hacking Democracy: Diebold (Voting Machine Software) Chairman 'promises' Vote for Ohio to G.W. Bush http://www.blackboxvoting.org/ http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/8/114.html "Why weren't voting systems being tested for Security?" - I.T.A. Independent auditors of election software. Democracy: Can we trust systems that have no accountability? * With electronic voting machines tabulating more than 80 percent of the ballots cast in America, * Seattle grandmother Bev Harris set out to determine the obvious: Do they work? * Based on the evidence presented here, the answer is "not really" * The picture that emerges as Harris unearths a treasure trove of info about mishandled votes and the inner workings of the machines is that they're not only fallible but also highly vulnerable to hacking. http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/8/114.html * This wonderful documentary proves my point that we have the best democracy that money can buy * along with our judicial system. * This film is more frightening than any horror film I've seen, because THIS IS REAL! * And this is movie biased? * Not at all. * It's an absolute eye opener that shows that your vote really doesn't count; and make sure you watch the deleted scenes(another 33 minutes of fantastic footage). Mainstream News Reports Black Box Voting » Latest News » Mainstream News Reports « Previous Next » Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post Dean Logan Says Unaffiliated WriteIns will be Checkedchristine c reid14 1 2-15-08 10:34 am New York Times re Holt BillV. Kurt Bellman26 1 2-8-08 1:57 pm AP Incorrectly calls Missouri for ClintonBill Bowen1 1 2-7-08 8:04 am San Fran CA-KSFO-AM reports Repub registration problemsNancy Tobi9 1 2-7-08 5:49 am Massachusetts results via your friends at LHSMike LaBonte10 1 2-7-08 5:24 am NJ Voting delay included Gov. CorzineMichael W Mather2 1 2-6-08 1:17 pm (CA) 2/08 - Voting machine probs delay Sacramento countPerry Duke9 1 2-5-08 6:34 pm (FL) 1/08 - More Florida voting machine problemsHal Guentert8 1 2-2-08 7:19 pm (FL) 1/08 - Final Florida results inkaren reineke11 1 2-1-08 4:25 pm (CO) 1/15 Democrats Ask Coffman to ResignFran Fleming1 1 2-1-08 9:41 am (FL) 1/08 - Problems already with voting machinesBev Harris 1 1 1-29-08 10:08 am (CO) Paper ballots win over RitterCatherine Ansbro3 1 1-29-08 2:16 am (MI) 12/07 - Proposition for new way to do primaries NEWS: Reform pres. candidate selection processCatherine Ansbro11 1 1-29-08 2:14 am Americans Abroad Can Now Vote Onlinesam lark7 1 1-26-08 3:49 pm (SC) 1/19/08 - Problems at polling locationsts taylor4 1 1-24-08 9:16 pm Feedback appreciated as this unfolds...Bruce Sims2 1 1-24-08 1:52 pm (Ohio) ACLU files suit to block paper ballots New paper ballots ca...Roger Wood20 2 1-20-08 9:43 pm REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER: Election Fraud RoundtableV. Kurt Bellman10 1 1-18-08 7:05 am (CO) Legislators lose their confidence in CoffmanCatherine Ansbro13 1 1-17-08 4:01 pm Olbermann Report !! On Voting Sue West6 1 1-17-08 3:53 pm GOP Figure Contracted to Deliver E-Voting Machines in MarylandAlex Laflamme1 1 1-17-08 9:43 am (NH) Experts skeptical of N.H. ballot-count conspiracy theoryBill Bowen60 1 1-16-08 10:37 pm Making votes countFran Fleming2 1 1-16-08 12:00 pm Ron Paul says in regard to New Hampshire voteDavid Evans1 1 1-13-08 8:32 am Diebold Changing its Buisness name Catherine Ansbro2 1 1-12-08 5:20 am (NH) 1/08 - Man plans recount of Republican vote in N.H. primary...Russell Novkov7 1 1-11-08 11:03 pm (TX) 10/07 - Another corrupt official, election tampering Refugio County - "Trust Me" failureCatherine Ansbro4 1 1-11-08 6:47 pm (FL) 9/07 - Volusia County again -- lots of defective memory cards... Volusia County - Voting system: Incident reportsWilliam Reese2 1 1-8-08 9:19 pm (FL) 10/07 - New machines, still not enough safeguards State of Florida - Voting systems: Transition to optical scan, issuesDon Powers2 1 1-8-08 12:00 am PC Magazine Article 09/12/07Don Powers2 1 1-7-08 10:45 pm (US) Can You Count On These Machines?Bev Harris 21 1 1-7-08 6:18 pm (US) Problems At Poll Permeate U.S. Political ProcessV. Kurt Bellman76 1 1-5-08 4:57 pm Legal Voters Thrown Off RollsV. Kurt Bellman7 1 1-3-08 11:15 am CNN: On the eve of Iowa caucus, some states give e-voting an 'F'...Russell Novkov2 1 1-2-08 3:42 pm (TX) 11/07 - Wharton County GOP will use paper ballots in primary... NEWS: Follow up on vote-flipping incidentLore2 1 1-1-08 3:35 pm (KY) 10/7 - Candidate for elections chief pleads guilty to forgery... Boone County - "Trust Me" FailureKathleen Wynne49 1 12-26-07 2:49 pm (US) 12/07 - FEC doors shut, 'No one left to answer phones'...Alan Brau4 1 12-25-07 8:29 pm (CO) 12/07 - Boulder: Stray marks caused decertificationBev Harris 1 1 12-23-07 9:49 pm (CO) 12/07 - Mesa: Commission defiant on vote machines NEWS: Resisting Colorado decertificationFran Fleming5 1 12-22-07 1:34 pm (AK) 12/07 - Impossible to tell whether 2004 count correct NEWS - Follow up on AZ Dem Party litigationBev Harris 1 1 12-21-07 7:05 am (CO) 12/07 - Denver: Voting gear out for count NEWS: Colo. decertification of Sequoia Julio Edwards1 1 12-18-07 6:41 am (US) 12/07 - Congressional watch tool for citizens PRESS RELEASE: New Freedom of Information toolBev Harris 1 1 12-11-07 7:20 am (PA) 11/07 - Philadelphia: Voter Fraud Allegations Again NEWS: Absentee ballot fraud allegationsV. Kurt Bellman21 1 12-7-07 2:02 pm (NJ) 12/07 - 'We are Neanderthals' - paper trail delayed again... NEWS: New Jersey paper trail statusBobby Arnold2 1 12-6-07 3:20 am (OH) 11/07 - Franklin County: Former elections official charged... NEWS: Election official corruptionBev Harris 2 1 12-2-07 7:50 am (OH) 11/07 - Township results flipped because of error (Lawrence Co... Lawrence County: Voting systems - Incident ReportBev Harris 4 1 11-23-07 2:00 pm (CT) 11/07 - Diebold/Premier machine miscount changes winner Greenwich: Voting systems - Incident reportsCatherine Ansbro4 1 11-23-07 1:47 pm (MS) 11/07 - New election ordered for Louise Linzy race Tunica County: Election incidentsBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 9:05 pm (NH) 11/07 - It's official: Jan. 8 primary date State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 8:28 pm (CA) 11/07 - Sec. State Bowen sues ES&S for $15 million State of California: Voting systems, ES&SBev Harris 3 1 11-21-07 9:09 pm (MI) 11/07 - It's back on: Mich. primary will proceed... State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of InformationBev Harris 1 1 11-21-07 10:38 am (MI) 11/07 - Michigan primary may not happen State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of Information Bev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:22 pm (NH) 11/07 - Pres primary date STILL not certain State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:06 pm (OH) 11/07 - Provisionals may alter outcome Clermont County: Provisional ballotsBev Harris 1 1 11-19-07 5:54 pm (TX) 11/07 - Alteration of live election data in Harris County... Harris County: Voting systems, "Trust Me"Russell Novkov12 1 11-15-07 9:18 pm (US) 11/07 - Sequoia voting systems under new ownership US - VendorsBev Harris 1 1 11-9-07 6:39 am (OH) 11/07 - Polls open later in ES&S location Putnam County - Voting Machines: Incident ReportsPatricia Berg1 1 11-7-07 4:34 am (FL) 10/07 - Appeals court rules The People "moot" Sarasota County - LitigationBev Harris 1 1 11-2-07 8:02 am (CT) 10/07 - Candidate's company will transport voting machines... New Britain - Chain of CustodyBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 11:22 am (IN) 10/07 - Polling locations reduced to four "vote centers"... Tippecanoe County - Access to PollsBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 8:12 am (FL) 10/07 - Wrong Ballots Sent To Miami Absentee Voters Miami-Dade County - Absentee / Mail-in Incident ReportBrant Lamb13 1 10-22-07 11:34 am (PA) 10/07 - County replacing WinVote Lackawanna County - Voting systems: Procurement Alan Brau43 1 10-18-07 7:56 pm (US) 9/07 - E-vote industry massaging itself in the media Voting systems: Security / Chain of CustodyBev Harris 52 1 10-14-07 11:07 am (OH) 10/07 - A funeral for a presidential election State of Ohio - Compliance, enforcement issuesAlan Brau3 1 10-11-07 4:32 pm (FL) 10/07 - Peculiar excuses block accountability for primary Martin County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-11-07 7:12 am (TX) 9/07 - Hilarious but improper: video of lawmakers cheat-voting... State of Texas - Noncompliance, enforcement issues with legislator voting rulesBrant Lamb11 1 10-3-07 5:06 am (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 testing continues... Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsRussell Novkov2 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (IN) 10/07 - Belly-up vendor, in come different machines Randolph County - Voting systems: ProcurementBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 report imminent Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:46 pm (US) 9/07 - If MS Excel bug = math errors, trust e-voting? US - Computer program: Incident reportBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:38 pm (NC) 9/07 - The registrar's secret lair Montgomery County - Chain of custodyBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 4:12 pm (NJ) 9/07 - Judge stalls on paper trail Mercer County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 3:46 pm (US) 9/07 - Less than 1/2 of military overseas votes counted US - Absentee / mail-in voting: Incidents, access problemsBev Harris 6 1 9-30-07 3:17 pm (GA) 9/07 - What's the punishment for throwing out 93,000 voter reg... Fulton County - Chain of custody / Privacy protection issuesBev Harris 1 1 9-28-07 9:12 am (US) 9/07 - Gird for massive new voting machine purchases: New stan... US - Voting systems: Standards, certification, procurementBrant Lamb16 1 9-27-07 5:02 am (PA) 9/07 County Commissioners' Assocation Opposes HR811 State of Pennsylvania - LegislationSamuel Scharff32 1 9-24-07 11:29 pm (CT) 9/07 - Voting rights activists express disappointment at CT s... State of Connecticut - Voting systems: Security Catherine Ansbro2 1 9-22-07 6:36 pm (NV) 9/07 - County to "prove Sequioa machines are secure"... Washoe County - Voting systems: SecurityBev Harris 1 1 9-22-07 9:43 am (IL) 9/07 - Indictment: Teamster Union vote rigging Teamster's Union [Chicago] - "Trust Me" failureBev Harris 1 1 9-8-07 4:48 pm (US) 2007 National news archive (see state foru... 130 24 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2006 National news archive (see state foru... 482 60 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2005 National news archive (see state foru... 310 152 10-11-07 12:24 pm (US) 2004 National news archive (see state forums for state news)... 77 42 10-11-07 12:24 pm Start New Thread http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/1954/1954.html Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post 2-5-08: What to watch for -- and do -- during & after Super Power T...allenfly15 1 2-12-08 12:32 am 1-29-08: Citizen's Guide to Following Vote Transport VehiclesJoel Morine31 1 2-10-08 7:18 am 1-29-08: Questions unfolding throughout New HampshireB Lindsey57 1 2-12-08 5:53 pm 1-24-08: Now posting - New Hampshire video evidenceNancy Tobi47 1 1-31-08 6:59 am 1-20-08: Holes hidden in plain sightCatherine Ansbro77 1 1-27-08 11:24 am 1-17-08: Ballot boxes found slit; NH stops putting ballots in vault; christine c reid264 1 2-13-08 8:21 pm 1-16-08: How New Hampshire is sizing upBrant Lamb172 1 2-4-08 4:39 am 1-15-08: Can recount chain of custody be rescued?Michael W Mather29 1 1-17-08 9:02 pm 1-12-08: Red Flags over New HampshireBrant Lamb153 1 1-22-08 4:41 am 1-10-08: Kucinich stepping into trap with recount?Catherine Ansbro138 1 1-15-08 12:56 pm 1-9-08: New England voting machine firm has executive criminal recordrush40 1 1-17-08 8:37 am 1-7-08: Silvestro the Cat & New Hampshire ElectionsBrett Woodward161 1 1-14-08 11:36 am 1-4-08: Eh? Iowa Republicans STILL missing 65 precincts in resultsJoel Morine41 1 1-9-08 4:04 am 1-3-08: What to do! Iowa Caucus instructions for everyoneChism Haworth26 1 1-4-08 3:09 pm 12-30-07: New problems identified with Iowa caucuses!David Luebbers48 1 1-13-08 4:16 am 12-14-07: UPDATE on Iowa Caucus ProceduresBev Harris 14 1 1-1-08 7:21 pm 11-29-07: MOONSHINE AMERICA – Collapse of the "Trust Me" modelJohn Dean15 1 1-13-08 1:06 pm 11-12-07: Unauthorized vote alterations on Texas iVotronic voting m...Bev Harris 8 1 11-16-07 4:06 pm 10-4-07: Connecticut Mayoral Scuffle Bev Harris 8 1 10-11-07 2:40 pm 9-19-07: Moonshine Elections 2 - Family Run GovermentJim March3 1 9-26-07 12:54 am 9-6-07: Moonshine Elections - The Hunt for Joe BoltonCatherine Ansbro15 1 9-14-07 9:36 pm 8-14-07: Moonshine Elections - Kentucky seriesBev Harris 4 1 9-14-07 7:38 am 8-3-07: California Decertifies, Boots InkaVote out of L.A. for goodBev Harris 15 1 8-6-07 1:31 pm 7-30-07: An Open Letter to Calif. Secretary of State BowenMark E. Smith18 1 8-7-07 9:33 am 7-17-07: HBO film on secret vote counting gets Emmy nominationRussell Novkov2 1 7-17-07 8:12 pm 7-13-07: Riverside proud to be dropped from "Top 2 Worst Places to ...Bev Harris 1 1 7-13-07 12:20 pm 7-12-07: California court may punish county for election records de...Russell Novkov2 1 7-12-07 9:04 pm 7-5-07: Debate w. a Chair #3: Will new elections "audits" help or h...Brant Lamb187 1 8-2-07 4:24 am 7-2-07: A preview on the audit debateV. Kurt Bellman62 1 7-7-07 1:39 pm 6-29-07: Debate with a Chair #2: Is no bill worse than a flawed bill?Udar Koschka35 2 7-21-07 6:04 am 6-28-07: Debate with a Chair (Part 1)Catherine Ansbro33 1 10-14-07 9:56 am 6-25-07: New Hampshire Sec. State rebukes attack on NH campaign fin...Bruce Sims12 1 6-27-07 10:39 am 6-10-07: Kucinich abandons support; for Holt Bill HR 811Catherine Ansbro13 1 6-24-07 2:30 am 5-30-07: (Calif.) The Voting Rights Obstacle Course - And the winne...Tom Courbat12 1 6-2-07 11:25 am 5-17-07: You have 2 weeks to restore your inalienable right to kic...Brant Lamb42 1 6-5-07 5:12 am 5-11-07: Uh-Oh -- HAMMERTIME! John C. Ervin12 1 6-14-07 2:54 am 5-8-07: U.S. Experiment Ready to Sail (Holt Bill out of committee)...Brant Lamb4 1 5-11-07 12:28 pm 4-9-07: Two voting products combine to steal your political privacyJohn Washburn23 1 4-26-07 2:13 pm 3-27-07 - Elections give you: The judge, the prosecutor and the she...Bev Harris 49 1 6-7-07 6:32 am 3-14-07: Riverside Rides Again ...Bev Harris 7 1 4-9-07 8:13 pm 3-9-07: The Black Box Voting Web site is changingVickie Karp16 1 3-21-07 6:03 am 2-20-07: Voting machines as a Ponzi SchemeBev Harris 77 1 3-16-07 3:48 pm 2-14-07: America's Funny Valentine - What is this romance with mach...Troy Seman2 1 2-15-07 12:14 pm 2-13-07: Agreement among groups as to Essential Revisions to HR 811Bob Roberts15 2 3-2-07 9:44 pm 2-8-07: Beware of the Bandwagon -- A concise list of problems with ...John C. Ervin12 1 2-14-07 5:48 pm 2-7-07: The Vu Memos - Cuyahoga Elections Director conversations wi...Catherine Ansbro5 1 2-8-07 2:01 pm 2-7-07: Son of Holt Bill: TechnoElection Dream Come True (But is it...Catherine Ansbro22 1 2-10-07 6:14 pm 2-6-07: New Rush Holt Bill Bev Harris4 1 2-6-07 10:42 am 2-5-07: Convicted Ohio elections workers ask for new trialKathleen Wynne6 1 2-6-07 7:38 am 2-1-07: Arizona computer logs show cheat-peeks at results, days bef...Gentry Lange4 1 3-16-07 8:43 am 1-30-07: HAVA -- The road to Boondoggle was paved with good intenti...Brant Lamb18 1 2-5-07 5:13 am 1-24-07: Two Ohio election workers found guilty; supervisors get of...Brant Lamb19 1 1-31-07 7:40 am 1-22-07: Diebold voting machines cost $2,000 more (each) in New Ham...Bev Harris4 1 1-29-07 9:09 am 1-20-07: Reports from the front lines - Kathleen Wynne video 'Best ...Kathleen Wynne7 1 1-21-07 3:39 pm 1-9-07: Vendor issues raised in Ohio, New HampshireBev Harris3 1 1-10-07 2:55 pm 12-30-06: Sign the REQUEST BY VOTERS --- Dear American Patriot, Samuel Scharff21 1 1-12-07 1:44 pm 12-22-06: Let's get down to the root of the problem: Freedom of Acc...Bev Harris1 1 12-22-06 3:23 pm 12-5-06: Government rejects NIST recommendations for paper trailCatherine Ansbro25 1 12-9-06 1:32 pm 11-22-06: ES&S serves up a Texas Turkey - Voting system stuffed wit...Greg Bodovsky15 1 12-13-06 7:43 pm 11-21-06: ES&S problem hit 34 counties in TexasBrant Lamb7 1 2-15-07 5:50 am 11-20-06: Black Box Voting receives new legal threats from ES&SJeffrey Ortiz21 1 12-13-06 7:34 pm 11-14-06: Arizona manual audit a farceDan Oetting9 1 11-18-06 2:39 pm 11-13-06: Sarasota! Florida! Never doubt that a small group of comm...Pat Vesely19 1 11-22-06 11:26 pm 11-13-06: Yes, the files on Slashdot are legit.Bev Harris23 1 11-27-06 6:48 am 11-9-06: A quick update on doingsBob Dean15 2 11-14-06 6:08 am 11-8-06: Rumsfeld replacement (Robert Gates) was director of voting...Bev Harris 93 2 1-6-08 8:49 am 11-8-06: The Sarasota Anomaly: Some say this is a smoking gun:Catherine Ansbro18 1 11-19-06 3:11 am 11-8-06: Black Box Voting to help citizens audit VIRGINIARoberta McKnight19 1 11-10-06 5:36 pm 11-7-06: What to expect -- and look for -- in the 2006 electionJanine L. Busald8 1 11-9-06 1:09 am 11-6-06: Ohio professor facing retaliatory (criminal) charges for a...Catherine Ansbro10 1 11-14-06 6:07 am 11-2-06: HBO "Hacking Democracy" to air tonight -- REVIEWSChipman Budlong71 7 11-11-06 12:23 pm 10-31-06: Reports from the front lines -- Citizens find critical se...suzanne warden15 1 11-6-06 7:10 am 10-27-06: Absentee voting is NOT advisable; Problems, things you sh...Gentry Lange17 2 3-16-07 8:54 am 10-15-06: Now we're getting somewhere -- Congressional hand counted...k.c.10 1 11-3-06 6:11 pm 10-6-06: 'The sheer number of legal/security violations is horrifyi...Jim March2 1 10-9-06 10:48 am 10-1-06: One on One with Cynthia McKinney -- Evidence, procedural p...Bev Harris7 1 10-10-06 9:56 am 9-27-06: Riverside California - One of the "Top 2" WORST PLACES TO ...Ginny Ross7 1 9-28-06 6:55 am 9-25-06: One-on-One - Allegan County Michigan citizens uncover issuesCatherine Ansbro7 1 9-27-06 2:52 pm 9-13-06: Paper Ballots Gaining Momentum - Court Decision, New Guide...John Heath5 1 10-2-06 5:55 pm 9-12-06: Election problems in the Sept. 12 primariesBev Harris1 1 9-12-06 12:12 pm 8-31-06: Stoopidest Sleepover Security Ever: Black Box Voting blows...V. Kurt Bellman19 1 9-20-06 12:00 pm 8-28-06: One-on-One -- Witness to vote-flipping: What should I do?Brian S16 2 11-7-06 4:49 pm 8-14-06: One on One Advice Comes Alive: How to stage an eventLinda Franz2 1 8-14-06 9:08 pm 8-11-06: One-on-One Advice Comes Alive Brant Lamb12 1 8-15-06 4:26 am 8-1-06: NOW IS THE TIME FOR YOUR 2 CENTS: Citizen Tool Kit to Take ...Dan Oetting73 2 8-26-06 5:42 pm 7-31-06: Georgia, Maryland Touch-screens -- New security defect evi...Jim March19 1 8-2-06 12:39 pm 7-27-06: Expensive, Insecure, Illegal, Unqualified and UnauditedRon Hammar12 2 8-26-06 4:32 pm 7-21-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Cuyahoga B.o.E. members call for Director ...John Washburn26 1 8-5-06 10:40 am 7-18-06: Georgia Election Malfunctions - Gird yourself for action, ...Brant Lamb24 1 9-5-06 4:46 am 7-17-06: The World's Quietest News Story: Kennedy Files Voting Mach...Linda Rogers4 1 7-29-06 9:07 am 7-10-06: Kentucky litigation - 'When computers fear jail, they'll b...Jenny L. Hurley6 1 7-12-06 8:37 am 07-08-06: Citizen Oversight - Pay Special Attention to Missing ItemsJody Holder19 1 7-12-06 4:20 pm 7-04-06: Black Box Voting's Declaration of IndependenceBev Harris19 1 7-15-06 1:40 pm Fourth of July Fireworks: Unredacted Hursti reports, photos releasedBrant Lamb44 1 7-12-06 5:20 am 6-27-06: Whatever happens in Utah elections - Capture on camera, audioV. Kurt Bellman11 1 6-29-06 10:44 am 6-26-06: The ultimate insult: Paper ballots entered into touch-screensTom Courbat16 1 6-28-06 1:42 pm 6-22-06: A 'Plan B' for voting machines: The National Hand Count Re...Bev Harris7 1 6-24-06 11:43 am 6-15-06: Solutions through citizen oversightBrant Lamb52 1 7-25-06 7:19 pm 6-12-06: Trouble seeks trouble - King County elections chief goes t...Tom Courbat8 1 6-21-06 6:08 pm 6-6-06: Hear the train a'comin' , Comin' round the bendBrant Lamb12 1 6-9-06 10:14 am 6-5-06: Citizens -- Here's how to watchdog electionBev Harris13 1 6-6-06 12:37 pm 5-23-06: Supplmental report adds new concerns to Hursti IIBev Harris51 1 7-1-06 10:49 am 5-19-06: Substitute 'L' for 'D' - Diebold claims Utah tests failed...Kathleen Wynne16 1 6-27-06 6:26 am 5-11-06: Three-level security flaws found in Diebold touch-screensRobert Sawdey182 1 6-7-06 11:52 am 5-10-06: Update on TSx reportCatherine Ansbro5 1 5-11-06 4:47 pm 5-10-06: As the Emery County findings evolve: Diebold's and Georgia...Joseph Hall5 1 5-11-06 2:15 pm 5-9-06: The Ohio Election BackwashAdele Eisner34 1 8-2-06 3:26 pm 5-4-06: Touch-screens fail security tests, Diebold retaliatessuhkara a yahweh`16 1 5-9-06 9:15 pm 5-4-06: Your chance to get evidence: WV, NE, KY, OR, PABev Harris1 1 5-4-06 9:13 am 5-2-06: Is the 2006 election train still on its tracks?John Washburn26 1 5-12-06 3:29 pm 4-24-06: Diebold whistleblower Stephen Heller compared to Daniel El...Russell Novkov2 1 4-24-06 3:06 pm 4-13-06: Last transcript - Calif. ITA hearings.John Washburn3 1 4-14-06 9:20 am 4-8-06: Why the Rush Holt bill (H.B. 550) is dangerousJonathan104 1 5-16-06 2:46 am 4-6-06: Utah Lt. Governor's office admits: some Diebold serial numb...ed hill32 1 4-10-06 7:24 pm 4-5-06: Transcript: Wyle Labs thinks Hursti Hack means 'the system ...John Washburn11 1 4-6-06 7:59 am 4-4-06: More Voting Machine Test Lab TranscriptsBev Harris12 1 4-6-06 11:32 pm 4-3-06: ALERT - elections officials: Diebold making 'visits' to you...Bruce Sims5 1 4-4-06 11:08 am 3-31-06: Bravissima! Calif. Senate Elections Committee grills two ...Catherine Ansbro28 1 4-12-06 1:59 pm 3-29-06: FL Attorney General Hits Voting Machine Vendors With Inves...Bev Harris4 1 3-30-06 10:39 am 3-28-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Diebold attempts to explain TSx memory def...Bev Harris34 1 4-3-06 9:17 am 03-18-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Diebold TSx touch-screen study (Part I)...Joseph Hall50 1 4-7-06 10:29 am 3-17-2006: New Black Box Voting report to be issued on Diebold TSx ...Jody Holder11 1 3-19-06 11:34 pm 3-11-06: The Stephen Heller Legal Defense FundJohn Washburn6 1 3-12-06 8:23 pm 3-8-06: Ion Sancho pits his lawyers against DieboldPat Vesely10 1 3-14-06 2:02 pm 3-3-06: While Florida vindicates Ion Sancho, Jeb Bush threatens Sa...Daniel R Spak29 1 3-19-06 5:45 pm 2-28-06: Take action NOW: Bullies pounding on whistleblowerRobert Sawdey11 1 3-9-06 5:47 pm 2-23-06: Someone accessed 40 Palm Beach County voting machines Nov ...Bev Harris110 1 3-9-06 7:30 am 2-21-06: An open letter to Bruce McPherson and the citizens of the ...Joycelynn Straight22 1 2-27-06 9:01 pm 2-17-06: BREAKING: Calif. Sec. State certifies entire Diebold produ...Bev Harris52 1 4-3-06 10:20 am 2-17-06: Election family tree: Who got us into this and how did the...Catherine Ansbro4 1 3-30-06 10:40 am 2-11-06: Voting machine examiners chickening out on Senate investig...Ron Crane24 1 2-18-06 1:27 pm 2-6-06: Landes takes e-voting to Supreme CourtV. Kurt Bellman24 1 4-19-06 10:33 am 2-6-06: Diebold agrees to waive proprietary claims to GEMS database...Marian Beddill12 1 2-11-06 1:38 pm 2-5-06: What protects your personal information once it enters e-el...Paul Lehto70 1 7-21-06 1:17 pm 2-2-06: Embezzler Jeff Dean remote accessed Calif. counties for 200...Kathleen Wynne4 1 2-2-06 8:38 am 2-1-06: Voting system examiners blocked from telling what they know?Byron Hale21 1 2-6-06 3:16 am 1-31-06: Diebold anticipates $100 to $125 million in 2006 voting sy...Bev Harris1 1 1-31-06 8:56 am 1-26-06: Elections Programmer Jeff Dean worked for same firm as for...Bev Harris25 1 1-27-06 12:45 pm 1-24-06: Public Records Get The Big Chill: Alaska's Voters vs Diebo...Jim March5 1 1-31-06 2:29 pm 1-13-06: ES&S reneges on Leon County deal 2 days before HAVA deadl...Catherine Ansbro33 1 1-17-06 1:20 am 1-9-2006: DuPage County Elections paid $30,000 to Republican politi...Bev Harris12 1 2-3-06 8:20 am 1-5-06: Wisconsin moves toward public source, then guts itJohn Washburn10 1 1-5-06 4:21 pm 1-3-2006: Hold on to your lugnuts, ES&S and Sequoia may risk Hurst...Brant Lamb33 1 1-25-06 4:56 am 12-30-05: Roll up your sleeves, we ain't done yet!BBV Admin1 1 12-30-05 4:26 pm 12-28-2005: Pennsylvania declines some Diebold but reveals an odd biasArnold Peckerman24 1 12-31-05 2:17 pm 12-23-05: ES&S under fire in CaliforniaEdward Robles5 1 12-26-05 5:36 am 12-20-05: California 'Hack' test stalled as Diebold certification d...Brant Lamb116 1 1-25-06 1:27 pm 12-13-05: Devastating hack proven - Leon County dumps DieboldSamuel Scharff97 1 5-29-06 9:25 pm 12-9-05: Diebold hack test -- Sec. State / Black Box lawyer square offJim March6 1 12-12-05 3:01 pm 12-7-05: Diebold stockholder suit - here's some ammoJim March7 1 12-8-05 9:37 am 12-4-05: 'Leave it up to us, we know best' say officialsBBV Admin27 2 12-15-05 4:17 am 11-30-05: Nope, the hack test won't be todayCatherine Ansbro25 1 1-3-06 12:51 am 11-28-05: Latest on California hack situationBruce Sims45 1 11-30-05 4:40 pm 11-24-05: Turkey Day leftovers: No thanks for stuffing elections wi...Edward Robles2 1 11-27-05 7:55 am 11-23-05: Flag on the play - Calif. Sec. State official calls foul ...Catherine Ansbro17 1 11-29-05 10:18 am 11-22-05: California invites Black Box Voting to hack Diebold votin...John Washburn31 1 12-9-05 8:23 am 11-22-2005: Updates on felons - Jeffrey Dean and John ElderBBV Admin7 1 11-22-05 9:37 am 11-21-05: Diebold violates court orderBBV Admin10 1 11-28-05 8:27 am 11-18-05: Fasten your seatbelts - It's time to bring this thing in ...Edward Robles7 1 11-27-05 9:12 am 11-15-05: FEC Investigating rapper P. Diddy (but not Blackwell or M...Edward Robles5 1 11-27-05 9:16 am 11-13-05: Detroit, Michigan elections are now a significant concernBBV Admin11 1 11-23-05 5:16 am 11-9-05: Los Angeles County has the dog & pony show downEdward Robles2 1 11-27-05 9:33 am 11-8-05: Share your observations on voting today hereKathleen Wynne10 1 11-10-05 9:15 am 11-6-05: Two state elections heads resign in FloridaBBV Admin6 1 11-6-05 5:11 am 11-4-05: Mail-in votes at higher risk with Diebold systemsBBV Admin1 1 11-4-05 8:00 am 11-3-05: The first public examination under the 15004 lawJohn Washburn5 1 11-6-05 6:41 am 10-28-05: Blackwell Blunders on Voting Machine ExaminationJohn Washburn14 1 10-31-05 11:23 am 10-26-05: The 'Perimeter Defense' - Follies and FailuresBBV Admin7 1 10-31-05 3:57 pm 10-21-05: GAO & NIST - Voting machine security finally goes mainstr...From the Mailbag10 1 10-29-05 11:39 am 10-9-05: VotoScope audit tool will catch Hart Intercivic bugBev Harris22 1 10-12-05 1:06 pm 10-8-05: Investors considering Diebold class action suitBev Harris1 1 10-8-05 3:08 pm 10-5-05: Diebold Lies Move Up the LadderBev Harris5 1 10-8-05 3:21 pm 9-19-2005: Carter-Baker Panel Report: Proposed Reforms Miss the BoatBrad Friedman52 1 10-3-05 12:02 pm 9-10-2005: Here's your chance to 'Look inside the Black Box':...alex baxter21 1 11-1-05 4:23 am 9-7-2005: Digital Image ballot scanners -- good or bad?Brant Lamb19 1 10-5-05 4:41 am 8-25-2005: Voting Rights Act expiration 2007Admin3 1 8-25-05 9:56 am 8-15-05: Election Reform -- Impending ShuffleCatherine_a107 1 8-25-05 1:51 pm 8-13-2005: If this doesn't get your blood boiling...Ubetchaiam9 1 8-15-05 11:24 am 8-10-2005: Mississippi Paper Trail ImminentCatherine Ansbro18 1 12-14-05 2:47 am 8-9-2005: Exactly what we don't want: Our election on Diebold's ser...John Howard13 1 10-5-05 8:20 pm 8-8-2005: Arcata, (CA) seeks to wrest election control from corpora...jimmarch6 1 8-12-05 12:33 am 8-5-05: 'Think Outside the Black Box' - ONLINE THINK TANK Admin5 1 8-17-05 7:46 am 8-3-05: San Diego backs down on charges against BBV director Jim MarchUbetchaiam32 1 8-22-05 12:01 pm 7-29-2005: Mississippi, listen up: California just rejected the TSxadmin17 1 8-13-05 8:15 pm 7-28-05: In his own words: Jim March on taking back his civil rightsmymarkx11 1 7-29-05 11:46 am 7-26-2005: BBV Board Member Arrested in San Diego for Viewing Vote-...cleanbean63 1 7-29-05 4:17 pm 7-25-2005: Wondering about mail-in voting? Diebold's new VoteRemote...Catherine Ansbro28 1 3-30-06 12:43 pm 7-21-2005: ES&S, Diebold lobbyists had ties to bribery investigatio...mary_ann9 1 7-31-05 12:00 am 7-20-2005: Internal documents reveal more Diebold ethics problemsadmin4 1 7-20-05 7:24 am 7-18-2005: Are The Lights Going Out In Georgia?admin5 1 7-22-05 3:14 pm 7-17-2005: Gallina (Diebold) reportedly paid Blackwell, GOP cronies...admin1 1 7-17-05 12:07 pm 7-11-2005: Case Against Diebold and Florida Division of Electionskathleen_wynne3 1 7-13-05 9:32 am 7-4-2005: The Black Box ReportJohn Dean36 1 5-8-06 6:05 pm 7-3-2005: Diebold accounting mistake -- SEC stuff may be a biggieadmin11 1 7-4-05 10:58 pm 7-1-2005: July 4 Security Alert for Diebold Optical Scanscatherine_a17 1 7-5-05 1:29 am 6-24-2005: Black Box Voting Litigation Fund LaunchedBev Harris2 1 2-3-06 8:22 am 6-17-05: Report on Calif. meeting -- Decertify Diebold?ubetchaiam11 1 7-21-05 2:37 pm 6-8-2005: Palm Beach County fails auditlinda_franz7 1 6-15-05 8:29 am 5-27-05: Optical scan system hacked (3 ways) - BBV ExclusiveBrant Lamb73 1 8-9-06 11:06 am 5-9-05: Consumer Report Series -- Following the Money Trail – Part Iadmin1 1 5-9-05 3:18 pm 5-6-04: $45m (Diebold?) contract flying under radar in Cook County ...admin2 1 5-6-05 2:53 pm 5-11-05: CANCELLED - Call to action May 19, Sacramentoadmin1 1 5-6-05 11:05 am 5-04-05 – Easier Hacking Access Sneaks in w. ADA Compliance Measuresadmin1 1 5-4-05 9:25 pm 4-24-05: LA's InkaVote system tied to Malaysian gambling outfitadmin1 1 4-24-05 12:43 pm 4-20-2005: Paper trail advocates - The devil in the detailsadmin1 1 4-20-05 11:54 am 4-18-2005: Diebold Lobbyist Documents Reveal Problemsadmin1 1 4-18-05 9:54 am 3-8-2005: Hack of Real-Life Voting System Demonstratedadmin1 1 3-9-05 12:51 pm 2-22-2005: Activating the Eagles -- Events this weekend in Californiaadmin1 1 2-22-05 5:08 pm 2-21-2005: Snohomish County (WA) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 4:51 pm 2-21-2005: Orange County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 12:57 pm 2-21-2005: Broward County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 12:14 pm 2-21-2005: Palm Beach County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 11:04 am 2-21-2005: Volusia County (FL) Updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 7:02 am 2-1-2005: Black Box Voting donates $2000 to Ohio lawyersadmin1 1 2-1-05 2:51 pm 1-28-05: Eagles rolling up sleeves in Ohio, Florida, Californiaadmin1 1 1-28-05 6:30 am 1-20-05: BULLETIN: California Panel OKs Voter Privacy Removaladmin1 1 1-20-05 6:05 pm 1-18-05: Consumer Protection lawsuit activated against Dieboldadmin1 1 1-19-05 4:43 am 1-17-05: Black Box Voting Document Archiveadmin1 1 1-17-05 1:42 pm 1-10-05: Exposing the Crypto Solutionadmin1 1 1-11-05 6:20 am 1-6-05: Constitutional Equal Protection Amendment for Voters?admin1 1 1-11-05 6:15 am 1-5-05: Election Misconduct as a Public Records Crisisadmin1 1 1-11-05 6:10 am 1-5-05: Update from Washington D.C.admin1 1 1-11-05 6:01 am 12-30-2004: Volunteer Actions -- Activating the Eaglesadmin1 1 1-11-05 5:50 am 12-29-04: Update on 'Help America Audit'admin1 1 1-11-05 5:44 am 12-28-04: Update for donors, and a look to 2005admin1 1 1-11-05 5:35 am 11-18-2004: Volunteer actions -- How to 'Be the Media'admin1 1 1-11-05 5:56 am Start New Thread Mainstream News Reports Black Box Voting » Latest News » Mainstream News Reports « Previous Next » Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post Dean Logan Says Unaffiliated WriteIns will be Checkedchristine c reid14 1 2-15-08 10:34 am New York Times re Holt BillV. Kurt Bellman26 1 2-8-08 1:57 pm AP Incorrectly calls Missouri for ClintonBill Bowen1 1 2-7-08 8:04 am San Fran CA-KSFO-AM reports Repub registration problemsNancy Tobi9 1 2-7-08 5:49 am Massachusetts results via your friends at LHSMike LaBonte10 1 2-7-08 5:24 am NJ Voting delay included Gov. CorzineMichael W Mather2 1 2-6-08 1:17 pm (CA) 2/08 - Voting machine probs delay Sacramento countPerry Duke9 1 2-5-08 6:34 pm (FL) 1/08 - More Florida voting machine problemsHal Guentert8 1 2-2-08 7:19 pm (FL) 1/08 - Final Florida results inkaren reineke11 1 2-1-08 4:25 pm (CO) 1/15 Democrats Ask Coffman to ResignFran Fleming1 1 2-1-08 9:41 am (FL) 1/08 - Problems already with voting machinesBev Harris 1 1 1-29-08 10:08 am (CO) Paper ballots win over RitterCatherine Ansbro3 1 1-29-08 2:16 am (MI) 12/07 - Proposition for new way to do primaries NEWS: Reform pres. candidate selection processCatherine Ansbro11 1 1-29-08 2:14 am Americans Abroad Can Now Vote Onlinesam lark7 1 1-26-08 3:49 pm (SC) 1/19/08 - Problems at polling locationsts taylor4 1 1-24-08 9:16 pm Feedback appreciated as this unfolds...Bruce Sims2 1 1-24-08 1:52 pm (Ohio) ACLU files suit to block paper ballots New paper ballots ca...Roger Wood20 2 1-20-08 9:43 pm REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER: Election Fraud RoundtableV. Kurt Bellman10 1 1-18-08 7:05 am (CO) Legislators lose their confidence in CoffmanCatherine Ansbro13 1 1-17-08 4:01 pm Olbermann Report !! On Voting Sue West6 1 1-17-08 3:53 pm GOP Figure Contracted to Deliver E-Voting Machines in MarylandAlex Laflamme1 1 1-17-08 9:43 am (NH) Experts skeptical of N.H. ballot-count conspiracy theoryBill Bowen60 1 1-16-08 10:37 pm Making votes countFran Fleming2 1 1-16-08 12:00 pm Ron Paul says in regard to New Hampshire voteDavid Evans1 1 1-13-08 8:32 am Diebold Changing its Buisness name Catherine Ansbro2 1 1-12-08 5:20 am (NH) 1/08 - Man plans recount of Republican vote in N.H. primary...Russell Novkov7 1 1-11-08 11:03 pm (TX) 10/07 - Another corrupt official, election tampering Refugio County - "Trust Me" failureCatherine Ansbro4 1 1-11-08 6:47 pm (FL) 9/07 - Volusia County again -- lots of defective memory cards... Volusia County - Voting system: Incident reportsWilliam Reese2 1 1-8-08 9:19 pm (FL) 10/07 - New machines, still not enough safeguards State of Florida - Voting systems: Transition to optical scan, issuesDon Powers2 1 1-8-08 12:00 am PC Magazine Article 09/12/07Don Powers2 1 1-7-08 10:45 pm (US) Can You Count On These Machines?Bev Harris 21 1 1-7-08 6:18 pm (US) Problems At Poll Permeate U.S. Political ProcessV. Kurt Bellman76 1 1-5-08 4:57 pm Legal Voters Thrown Off RollsV. Kurt Bellman7 1 1-3-08 11:15 am CNN: On the eve of Iowa caucus, some states give e-voting an 'F'...Russell Novkov2 1 1-2-08 3:42 pm (TX) 11/07 - Wharton County GOP will use paper ballots in primary... NEWS: Follow up on vote-flipping incidentLore2 1 1-1-08 3:35 pm (KY) 10/7 - Candidate for elections chief pleads guilty to forgery... Boone County - "Trust Me" FailureKathleen Wynne49 1 12-26-07 2:49 pm (US) 12/07 - FEC doors shut, 'No one left to answer phones'...Alan Brau4 1 12-25-07 8:29 pm (CO) 12/07 - Boulder: Stray marks caused decertificationBev Harris 1 1 12-23-07 9:49 pm (CO) 12/07 - Mesa: Commission defiant on vote machines NEWS: Resisting Colorado decertificationFran Fleming5 1 12-22-07 1:34 pm (AK) 12/07 - Impossible to tell whether 2004 count correct NEWS - Follow up on AZ Dem Party litigationBev Harris 1 1 12-21-07 7:05 am (CO) 12/07 - Denver: Voting gear out for count NEWS: Colo. decertification of Sequoia Julio Edwards1 1 12-18-07 6:41 am (US) 12/07 - Congressional watch tool for citizens PRESS RELEASE: New Freedom of Information toolBev Harris 1 1 12-11-07 7:20 am (PA) 11/07 - Philadelphia: Voter Fraud Allegations Again NEWS: Absentee ballot fraud allegationsV. Kurt Bellman21 1 12-7-07 2:02 pm (NJ) 12/07 - 'We are Neanderthals' - paper trail delayed again... NEWS: New Jersey paper trail statusBobby Arnold2 1 12-6-07 3:20 am (OH) 11/07 - Franklin County: Former elections official charged... NEWS: Election official corruptionBev Harris 2 1 12-2-07 7:50 am (OH) 11/07 - Township results flipped because of error (Lawrence Co... Lawrence County: Voting systems - Incident ReportBev Harris 4 1 11-23-07 2:00 pm (CT) 11/07 - Diebold/Premier machine miscount changes winner Greenwich: Voting systems - Incident reportsCatherine Ansbro4 1 11-23-07 1:47 pm (MS) 11/07 - New election ordered for Louise Linzy race Tunica County: Election incidentsBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 9:05 pm (NH) 11/07 - It's official: Jan. 8 primary date State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 8:28 pm (CA) 11/07 - Sec. State Bowen sues ES&S for $15 million State of California: Voting systems, ES&SBev Harris 3 1 11-21-07 9:09 pm (MI) 11/07 - It's back on: Mich. primary will proceed... State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of InformationBev Harris 1 1 11-21-07 10:38 am (MI) 11/07 - Michigan primary may not happen State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of Information Bev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:22 pm (NH) 11/07 - Pres primary date STILL not certain State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:06 pm (OH) 11/07 - Provisionals may alter outcome Clermont County: Provisional ballotsBev Harris 1 1 11-19-07 5:54 pm (TX) 11/07 - Alteration of live election data in Harris County... Harris County: Voting systems, "Trust Me"Russell Novkov12 1 11-15-07 9:18 pm (US) 11/07 - Sequoia voting systems under new ownership US - VendorsBev Harris 1 1 11-9-07 6:39 am (OH) 11/07 - Polls open later in ES&S location Putnam County - Voting Machines: Incident ReportsPatricia Berg1 1 11-7-07 4:34 am (FL) 10/07 - Appeals court rules The People "moot" Sarasota County - LitigationBev Harris 1 1 11-2-07 8:02 am (CT) 10/07 - Candidate's company will transport voting machines... New Britain - Chain of CustodyBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 11:22 am (IN) 10/07 - Polling locations reduced to four "vote centers"... Tippecanoe County - Access to PollsBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 8:12 am (FL) 10/07 - Wrong Ballots Sent To Miami Absentee Voters Miami-Dade County - Absentee / Mail-in Incident ReportBrant Lamb13 1 10-22-07 11:34 am (PA) 10/07 - County replacing WinVote Lackawanna County - Voting systems: Procurement Alan Brau43 1 10-18-07 7:56 pm (US) 9/07 - E-vote industry massaging itself in the media Voting systems: Security / Chain of CustodyBev Harris 52 1 10-14-07 11:07 am (OH) 10/07 - A funeral for a presidential election State of Ohio - Compliance, enforcement issuesAlan Brau3 1 10-11-07 4:32 pm (FL) 10/07 - Peculiar excuses block accountability for primary Martin County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-11-07 7:12 am (TX) 9/07 - Hilarious but improper: video of lawmakers cheat-voting... State of Texas - Noncompliance, enforcement issues with legislator voting rulesBrant Lamb11 1 10-3-07 5:06 am (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 testing continues... Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsRussell Novkov2 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (IN) 10/07 - Belly-up vendor, in come different machines Randolph County - Voting systems: ProcurementBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 report imminent Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:46 pm (US) 9/07 - If MS Excel bug = math errors, trust e-voting? US - Computer program: Incident reportBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:38 pm (NC) 9/07 - The registrar's secret lair Montgomery County - Chain of custodyBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 4:12 pm (NJ) 9/07 - Judge stalls on paper trail Mercer County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 3:46 pm (US) 9/07 - Less than 1/2 of military overseas votes counted US - Absentee / mail-in voting: Incidents, access problemsBev Harris 6 1 9-30-07 3:17 pm (GA) 9/07 - What's the punishment for throwing out 93,000 voter reg... Fulton County - Chain of custody / Privacy protection issuesBev Harris 1 1 9-28-07 9:12 am (US) 9/07 - Gird for massive new voting machine purchases: New stan... US - Voting systems: Standards, certification, procurementBrant Lamb16 1 9-27-07 5:02 am (PA) 9/07 County Commissioners' Assocation Opposes HR811 State of Pennsylvania - LegislationSamuel Scharff32 1 9-24-07 11:29 pm (CT) 9/07 - Voting rights activists express disappointment at CT s... State of Connecticut - Voting systems: Security Catherine Ansbro2 1 9-22-07 6:36 pm (NV) 9/07 - County to "prove Sequioa machines are secure"... Washoe County - Voting systems: SecurityBev Harris 1 1 9-22-07 9:43 am (IL) 9/07 - Indictment: Teamster Union vote rigging Teamster's Union [Chicago] - "Trust Me" failureBev Harris 1 1 9-8-07 4:48 pm (US) 2007 National news archive (see state foru... 130 24 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2006 National news archive (see state foru... 482 60 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2005 National news archive (see state foru... 310 152 10-11-07 12:24 pm (US) 2004 National news archive (see state forums for state news)... 77 42 10-11-07 12:24 pm Start New Thread 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review Reviews Voted Most Helpful Votes are counted and displayed within 24 hours HM 1355196 37% Similar To You HM 1355196's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is an excellent documentary that I think every American should see before they vote again. This is not a movie about Bush vs. Kerry or Republicans vs. Democrats. Its about our current voting system and exposing a multitude of problems with that system as demonstrated in the 2004 election. We are told "EVERY VOTE COUNTS" and this documentary exposes the corruption, mistruths, and shameful negligence and mishandling of these "VOTES" in a way that cannot be denied nor ignored - unless you don't watch it for yourself. 73 out of 78 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful TerBo 40% Similar To You TerBo's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is a must-see documentary, especially for those still doubtful about whether elections in this country can be tampered with. The answer is yes, yes, yes!!! Kudos to Bev Harris who has dedicated years to exposing the corruption surrounding electronic voting. Get this. After Hacking Democracy's premiere on HBO, Harris received death threats. That's how risky and powerful her work is. 67 out of 77 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Shiftdnb 47% Similar To You Shiftdnb's other reviews > 4.0 Stars This is an amazing documentary showing that there are problems with the way we vote in America. When a normal everyday citizen gets up and challenges the system, you see how the system fights back. This woman doesn't give up like most of us would and shows us and one election official in Florida that the way our voting system was run and still is, has errors. 29 out of 36 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Most Recent Reviews SG 178412 23% Similar To You SG 178412's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Anyone who cares at all about the future of democracy in America (R or D or whatever else party affiliation you choose) NEEDS to see this movie. 1 out of 1 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful grw 970297 20% Similar To You grw 970297's other reviews > 5.0 Stars If our so-called government doesn't fix the problems exposed in this excellent documentary, our democracy no longer will exist. Abolish electronic voting machines!! I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Professional Bum 63% Similar To You Professional ...'s other reviews > 5.0 Stars If you are an American & have the ability to vote, please do yourself a favor and put this in your queue immediately(especially since this is an election year). This wonderful documentary proves my point that we have the best democracy that money can buy, along with our judicial system. This film is more frightening than any horror film I've seen, because THIS IS REAL! And this is movie biased? Not at all. It's an absolute eye opener that shows that your vote really doesn't count; and make sure you watch the deleted scenes(another 33 minutes of fantastic footage). 1 out of 1 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews hawk5391 58% Similar To You hawk5391's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Even though I also watched the original slasher classic Black Christmas, this was the scariest movie I saw over the Christmas break. Although the filmmakers obviously have every reason to sensationalize potential problems with electronic voting systems ("good news is no news," right?), the implications here are frightening. Not only did Bev Harris (founder of a non-partisan watchdog group) find voting machine code unprotected on the internet, she was able to successfully hack it and prove that results could be manipulated (you can watch this being done in a matter of seconds in this film). The lack of oversight of the companies who control the majority of electronic voting is astounding, almost as bad as the sloppy manner in which our government oversees the elections themselves. 10 out of 10 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Cassun 53% Similar To You Cassun's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Probably the scariest movie I've watched in a long time. The production value isn't good, but its worth sitting through to find out just how easy it would be for just one person with an agenda to manipulate the outcome of an election. 9 out of 12 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful LR 572736 43% Similar To You LR 572736's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Politics in America is scarey enough, but when you see what is going on with our elections system, you will just go through the roof. We have hoped through the last few centuries that a government of the people, by the people and for the people would not parish from the face of the earth, and that America would be its shining example. After viewing this flick, you will realize just how tarnished our example has become. We have realized in the past decades, that money rules, and it just feels like our votes don't count, only the money that backs our politicians. Only the corporations and special interests have access to the politicians these days, not the people that vote. This picture goes a long way to explaining how that happens. After realizing the truths in this documentary, I feel even more helpless and useless to change a corrupt government by my vote. Did my vote get counted? How would I even know? The facts put forth in this program are just about incredible, but you come away realizing their powerful credibility. I wondered why their hasn't been criminal prosecution of the election fraud that is running rampant in our country today? Where are prosecuters? Why aren't elections officials who ignore our right to have our votes counted, recounter and certified being placed on trial for crimes against the electorate? You owe it to yourself and your country to see this documentary long before the next election. Don't miss this one! 8 out of 9 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful CP 1799900 36% Similar To You CP 1799900's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Wow. I just finished watching this documentary, and I can't believe what I heard and saw. This is not another Michael Moore speculative film that makes assumptions with no factual evidence. This is incredible. Everyone should see this film. It is truly an amazing look inside of our election system. 8 out of 9 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review SN 25968 62% Similar To You SN 25968's other reviews > 5.0 Stars We must all see this movie. It's not JUST about elections. It's about the undermining of our society, the breakdown. My opinion is that we should get away from secret voting and out into the public. Democracy is where WE THE PEOPLE elect our officials. You must see this to know why I write this. 4 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful JR 1824621 61% Similar To You JR 1824621's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is what makes America great: a woman, with a full life, puts it all behind her because she has come across the ultimate injustice and knows that she must right it. This is the story of the creation of the group and webpage BlackBoxVoting.com Having found the Diebold's source code, a code that not even the President of the United States can see, Bev Harris takes the code to an expert. What is revealed causes Harris to criss cross America, to prove the fact that Diebold had literally hijacked democracy. Although it's possible, it's difficult to believe that anyone can think that the 2004 Presidential Election wasn't rigged after viewing this film. A 'must see' for every American. 4 out of 4 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PW 51% Similar To You PW's other reviews > 5.0 Stars One of the scariest movies I've ever seen... because it's true. If you liked 'All the presidents men' or 'The Insider' You'll like this movie. Actually come to think of it, what this story needs is a treatment like the above mentioned movies so the message could have a broader appeal beyond this documentary. 5 out of 6 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful FV 1232392 44% Similar To You FV 1232392's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Highly recommedable as the documentary reveals what we all have been suspecting and fearing in an objective and somewhat scientific way. It is quite timely, and I think we can all relate to the topic at hand. I was touched by the reaction of some of the people in the movie when they proved how the voting system can be hacked without much effort 4 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Steve Smith 38% Similar To You Steve Smith's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Unbelievable. That's how I describe this excellent documentary. Every citizen of the USA owes it to themselves to watch this documentary. It is just shocking. It calls into question everything we know about how our votes are recorded in this country. My jaw literally dropped when I saw one part of it. I won't ruin it for those who haven't seen it. You MUST watch this! 4 out of 4 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Ben5765 35% Similar To You Ben5765's other reviews > 4.0 Stars This film is all about voting machines and how votes are tabulated. It makes mincemeat of the Diebold Corporation, manufacturer of a large percentage of the electronic voting machines used in the United States. It reveals Diebold officials making lie after lie about the security of their machines. The makers of the film meticulously document how, using Diebold's machines and data cards, someone with just a basic understanding of the technology involved (including, certainly, any Diebold employee) could rig the vote count, on one machine or on thousands of them, with absolutely no record that the rigging was ever done. The film also reveals how Diebold's chief executive officer was (and maybe still is) a large contributor to the Republican Party. He once wrote a letter stating that he would "deliver" Ohio's electoral votes in the 2004 presidential election for George W. Bush. The film later shows how his company managed to persuade Cuyahoga County, Ohio (where Cleveland is) to buy its machines. Maybe there is nothing fishy going on there, but appearances matter! Lest the film be seen as partisan, it features, among others, a Republican office-seeker from Louisiana who, after losing her race, went to view a demonstration of the machines that the voters used. As part of the demonstration she pressed the button next to her name, and the machine registered a vote for her opponent. Hmmm. She was understandably troubled. Moreover, the film points out that in many parts of the country it is in fact the local Republican Party that is wary of electronic voting machines, not the Democrats. Hacking Democracy also reveals problems with punch card voting systems--problems that dwarf the famous "hanging chad" problem of the 2000 presidential vote count in Florida. The film's message is distressing, but it is one all American citizens should hear and see. 5 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AdriH 34% Similar To You AdriH's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Yes, the documentary could use a bit of editing, but the points raised are valid enough to keep it interesting. Instead of taking a partisan view on the movie, realize how intensly frightening this movie really is. Should it be just one grandmother's job to inform us how we're being duped? No. It's our responsibility as citizens to stay informed and demand voting accuracy. 5 out of 7 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful DM 1548398 12% Similar To You DM 1548398's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Frightening and timely documentary that exposes the very painful truth about the U.S. electoral system and vote count fraud. A must see if you plan to vote ever! 5 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PM 748973 — —% Similar To You PM 748973's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This presentation should be shown to every high school junior and senior. Maybe they will be able to bring about the changes needed to restore our country to what it once was. Our democratic republic is long gone. 6 out of 6 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review Lee Anne and Tim 64% Similar To You Lee Anne and ...'s other reviews > 5.0 Stars Every voter should see this film. It leaves you with your head shaking, wondering how the history of the last 8 years might read if the vote-tampering exposed in Hacking Democracy hadnt been possible. Also a testament to how one regular person can make a difference, this documentary is very well done. Youll hate what you learn. 6 out of 10 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful yla 83539 39% Similar To You yla 83539's other reviews > 5.0 Stars SA 1674508, Yazheirx, JR 65420, RS 305556, their reviews are absolutely the threat that we all have about democracy. It is because their kind of ignorance that this movie is a 5 star and a must for every single human being to watch and learn. There is no excuse for any voting system to be too technical, too complex, too secret that we cannot prove what the votes were years from when the votes were taken. Not even 50 years, not even 100 years, not even 1000 years, not ever. For anyone to suggest that the electronic voting system is not possible to understand and to do a documentary for by a handful of heroic citizens, it is an insult to this country and democracy. Let these be the commandments of election: 1) No voting methods should be more complicated than what pen/pencil can do on a ballot. 2) Vote handling in any election process should be transparent to the public no matter when, why, how, what, who. 3) Only 100% accuracy should be accepted. Anything less then 100% should be recounted no matter how many times, how long it takes, and how much it cost to be 100% accurate. 4) Without 100% accuracy, election cannot be concluded. Another election should be conducted immediately without further delay. 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful ayi 554466 35% Similar To You ayi 554466's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Factual information clearly presented. I fear it is all too true and I fear for the next election. 5 out of 8 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AL 1659593 33% Similar To You AL 1659593's other reviews > 2.0 Stars For content, I'd give it 3 stars. It was an eye-opening look at the problems at the flaws of the "touch screen" and memory card system. What turned me off was the overboard emotions and cheesy speeches from the women of the watchdog groups. 4 out of 6 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful TD 1852913 31% Similar To You TD 1852913's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I simply cannot believe this is true. I simply cannot believe the voting process is so secretive! I am still in High School and I could probably devise a system more secure than what every American trusts to count their votes! Every American owes it to themselves to watch this incredible docudrama of corporate greed, secrecy, corruption, and lies. Every American. 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AK 817970 29% Similar To You AK 817970's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I would have to agree with everyone else in stating this a must see film for everyone. I was shocked and surprised at how poorly designed the electronic voting system is. How corrupt the political voting process is. Without this video no one would have seen the voting process. Watch this film you won't regret it. 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful jes 881880 26% Similar To You jes 881880's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Eye opening. My question is, "Why haven't criminal investigations been started?!?" I agree with the majority of the comments saying we should all see this movie; i would add it's imperative we do something with what we know after watching it. Hold our representitives accountable!!! 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful KS 608754 24% Similar To You KS 608754's other reviews > 5.0 Stars If this doesn't make people realize that we need to change how our elections are held, nothing will! Republicans and Democrats should be concerned...ALL AMERICANS should be concerned and angry. If any politician does not want to fix this system, that politician needs to leave their office. 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PD 253868 22% Similar To You PD 253868's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I believe every citizen of voting age in the United States should view this film because it is very informative on the computerized voting systems across the country. After all, if our votes don't count we have no democracy. Watch this fim and tell your family, friends and co-workers to do the same! 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful xpf 1252893 12% Similar To You xpf 1252893's other reviews > 4.0 Stars The content is compelling and if even half of it is true, our democracy is very troubled. We need to demand truth and accuracy at the polls and we need to take action NOW! 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review DH 1154150 62% Similar To You DH 1154150's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Watch this movie. Tell your friends and family to watch this movie. The subjects are intelligent, articulate, and extremely courageous. This movie shows compelling evidence that makes me want to learn more about how easy it has been to alter the "results" of our government's elections, and ask what we can do to stop the fraud! 4 out of 7 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Yazheirx 57% Similar To You Yazheirx's other reviews > 2.0 Stars Like several other reviewers I wanted to like this movie but the spin and lack of solution suggestions prevented me. I agree with the need for more transparency with voting machines. I think we should have an open source voting program such that interest groups can spend their money to improve them. I still could not get past the spin. The final documentary cardinal sin for me is -

Would you tell me what you think of my chapter 2, please? Hi, I wrote this a while ago and don't know what to do to make it better, I know its long and if you take the time I will really be very grateful x 2 "Here we go doll, 62nd street,” As Eddie helps get my luggage out of the trunk, I can't believe the sight I’m seeing. My new apartment block is unbelievable; a green velvet rug leads into the doorway, with a matching canopy overhead, while a posh looking man stands at the door. I have only seen this kind of things in movies, but now I'm here and it’s all real. "Well here you go, enjoy your new life in fabulous New York City," shouts Eddie. "Thanks Eddie, give your ex wife my love," I laugh. "Ha ha good old English humor," Eddie shouts out his cab window, as he drives away. Just then as I'm looking around in astonishment, a man by the door walks up to me. He’s wearing a chauffeur hat, a smart looking suit and unbelievable shiny black shoes. I swear I could see my face in them if I looked down. "Hi madam, I'm Maurice, I am the doorman and security for these apartments, would you like some help with your luggage?” "Oh yes please, that would be great thank you sir,”. "No problem, I might be a while," Maurice says, while looking at my six massive cases. "That’s fine Maurice," I say. I could get used to this. They don't have this kind of thing in England, where I am from; Cambridge. How cool would it be if you drove up to your house, and you had a doorman standing waiting to help with all your sale bags from a hard day shopping? Think about it, you could just go straight into the kitchen and pour yourself a glass of red wine, go back and sit on the sofa and just wave your hand in the direction to where you want your very own "Maurice" to put all your bags. As I open the door to reception it's like a palace. The same green velvet rug covers the whole space, over to the left is a large desk, which is all over marble and to the right is what looks like an expensive Persian rug with two large cream sofas. I really can't believe this place, it looks better than my living room back home and its only reception! As I approach the funny looking man at the desk, he’s on the telephone. "Yes mum , I won't be out late , listen, I gotta go , I have a resident to attend to , yes mum , ok love you too,” He puts the phone down, and I try, unsuccessfully, not to laugh. "Oh that was my mum, she just eh worry’s about my uhm... cats, if I'm out all night partying you know about them getting fed and stuff .... I don’t live at home still!" he says, with a tone I know means he is still living at home. "Ah ok. Anyway I'm Sophie Smith, I’ve just moved here, and I'm renting out apartment 225," I say still slightly laughing. "Ah Sophie, lovely to meet you, how was your flight, I'm Eugene, " Eugene I think to myself, I should have known that. He looks like a Eugene; you know tall, blonde, glasses as thick as milk bottle bottoms, and I can't believe what he’s wearing. A checked shirt with braces and fawn old man trousers. "Eh yes my flight was fine thanks, do you have my key?" He is looking at me like I'm a complete ***** but to be honest I'm just too stunned, by the way, he's dressed to say anything else. Just as I’m about to walk to the lift, I hear a bang, I look around to see poor old Maurice trying to navigate himself and my heavy cases through the door. The poor man maybe I should go help? Nah not this time I mean I have never had this doorman experience before and after all it is his job, he will probably be offended if I ask him if he needs help. I get in the lift which is bigger than my old box room, and push the number four button. Ding, the doors open and there are just rows and rows of doors and green velvet carpet. I start to walk looking at the doors as I look for my number; finally I find my door, three doors from the end of the hallway. I put my key in the keyhole and turn. "WOW”. There is a large hallway before I even get into the living area. On the right of the wall is a couple of expensive looking art pieces, I think they are expensive; I mean I have never really been an art lover. On the left are three doors. I look in the first, which is a large bedroom. It's gorgeous; there is a four poster bed straight ahead and behind it a large window with absolute stunning cream curtains. I then go out and head for door number two, it's a bathroom with the biggest bath I have ever seen and two sinks, why two sinks? Maybe one is for washing and the other is for brushing your teeth, maybe that’s how they do it here in New York. The toilet pan is gold , well not real gold but gold in color , I hope it's not real gold if it is I will be scared to use it Ok time for door number three , I feel like I'm on Blind Date , it's an old program back home where you sit behind a screen and choose a date from mystery men numbered one to three. I can't believe it, it's another bedroom, a lot smaller but with no bed, what am I going to use it for? Maybe just a big massive walk in wardrobe that would be useful. I come out and close the door feeling pleased with myself, that I'm already feeling at home. I walk down the hall and enter a large open plan living room and kitchen. I don’t even notice the kitchen at first because to be honest I don’t really like kitchens, I'm not much of a cook, believe it or not. Straight ahead, past the big chocolate brown corner suite and the big plasma on the wall is a large bay window which opens out onto a balcony. I go out onto the balcony and the sight takes my breath away, CENTRAL PARK! How did I not notice that down at the door?

What is your zodiac sign? Does any of this describe you? Aries Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses. Taurus You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God. Gemini Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius. Cancer You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans Leo You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls. Virgo You are a pain in the ***. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ***. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo. Libra You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all. Scorpio You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it. Sagittarius Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip. Capricorn Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ***. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's cockeyed system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns Aquarius The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians. Pisces Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your *** and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want. rach2305: i just c + v from another website :) oops i mean copy + paste

What's your zodiac sign? (Is this true about you)? Aries Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses. Taurus You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God. Gemini Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius. Cancer You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans Leo You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls. Virgo You are a pain in the ***. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ***. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo. Libra You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all. Scorpio You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it. Sagittarius Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip. Capricorn Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ***. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's cockeyed system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns Aquarius The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians. Pisces Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your *** and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want.

What is your zodiac sign? Does any of this describe you? Aries Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses. Taurus You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God. Gemini Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius. Cancer You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans Leo You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls. Virgo You are a pain in the ***. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ***. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo. Libra You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all. Scorpio You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it. Sagittarius Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip. Capricorn Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ***. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's cockeyed system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns Aquarius The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians. Pisces Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your *** and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want.

What is your zodiac sign? Does any of this describe you? Aries Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses. Taurus You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God. Gemini Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius. Cancer You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans Leo You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls. Virgo You are a pain in the ***. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ***. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo. Libra You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all. Scorpio You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it. Sagittarius Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip. Capricorn Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ***. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's cockeyed system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns Aquarius The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians. Pisces Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your *** and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want.

How many receipt-less voting machines are used nation-wide? Search:GEMS Diebold optical scan machines are being rigged for Bush Skull & Bones connection of Bush & Kerry: "Our Side (Race) won" Fraternity News (www.wikipedia.com_skull_and_bones) Poll Tapes thrown away - Against Federal Law (must be kept for 22 mos. by law) Hacking Democracy: Diebold (Voting Machine Software) Chairman 'promises' Vote for Ohio to G.W. Bush http://www.blackboxvoting.org/ http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/8/114.html "Why weren't voting systems being tested for Security?" - I.T.A. Independent auditors of election software. Democracy: Can we trust systems that have no accountability? * With electronic voting machines tabulating more than 80 percent of the ballots cast in America, * Seattle grandmother Bev Harris set out to determine the obvious: Do they work? * Based on the evidence presented here, the answer is "not really" * The picture that emerges as Harris unearths a treasure trove of info about mishandled votes and the inner workings of the machines is that they're not only fallible but also highly vulnerable to hacking. http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/8/114.html * This wonderful documentary proves my point that we have the best democracy that money can buy * along with our judicial system. * This film is more frightening than any horror film I've seen, because THIS IS REAL! * And this is movie biased? * Not at all. * It's an absolute eye opener that shows that your vote really doesn't count; and make sure you watch the deleted scenes(another 33 minutes of fantastic footage). Mainstream News Reports Black Box Voting » Latest News » Mainstream News Reports « Previous Next » Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post Dean Logan Says Unaffiliated WriteIns will be Checkedchristine c reid14 1 2-15-08 10:34 am New York Times re Holt BillV. Kurt Bellman26 1 2-8-08 1:57 pm AP Incorrectly calls Missouri for ClintonBill Bowen1 1 2-7-08 8:04 am San Fran CA-KSFO-AM reports Repub registration problemsNancy Tobi9 1 2-7-08 5:49 am Massachusetts results via your friends at LHSMike LaBonte10 1 2-7-08 5:24 am NJ Voting delay included Gov. CorzineMichael W Mather2 1 2-6-08 1:17 pm (CA) 2/08 - Voting machine probs delay Sacramento countPerry Duke9 1 2-5-08 6:34 pm (FL) 1/08 - More Florida voting machine problemsHal Guentert8 1 2-2-08 7:19 pm (FL) 1/08 - Final Florida results inkaren reineke11 1 2-1-08 4:25 pm (CO) 1/15 Democrats Ask Coffman to ResignFran Fleming1 1 2-1-08 9:41 am (FL) 1/08 - Problems already with voting machinesBev Harris 1 1 1-29-08 10:08 am (CO) Paper ballots win over RitterCatherine Ansbro3 1 1-29-08 2:16 am (MI) 12/07 - Proposition for new way to do primaries NEWS: Reform pres. candidate selection processCatherine Ansbro11 1 1-29-08 2:14 am Americans Abroad Can Now Vote Onlinesam lark7 1 1-26-08 3:49 pm (SC) 1/19/08 - Problems at polling locationsts taylor4 1 1-24-08 9:16 pm Feedback appreciated as this unfolds...Bruce Sims2 1 1-24-08 1:52 pm (Ohio) ACLU files suit to block paper ballots New paper ballots ca...Roger Wood20 2 1-20-08 9:43 pm REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER: Election Fraud RoundtableV. Kurt Bellman10 1 1-18-08 7:05 am (CO) Legislators lose their confidence in CoffmanCatherine Ansbro13 1 1-17-08 4:01 pm Olbermann Report !! On Voting Sue West6 1 1-17-08 3:53 pm GOP Figure Contracted to Deliver E-Voting Machines in MarylandAlex Laflamme1 1 1-17-08 9:43 am (NH) Experts skeptical of N.H. ballot-count conspiracy theoryBill Bowen60 1 1-16-08 10:37 pm Making votes countFran Fleming2 1 1-16-08 12:00 pm Ron Paul says in regard to New Hampshire voteDavid Evans1 1 1-13-08 8:32 am Diebold Changing its Buisness name Catherine Ansbro2 1 1-12-08 5:20 am (NH) 1/08 - Man plans recount of Republican vote in N.H. primary...Russell Novkov7 1 1-11-08 11:03 pm (TX) 10/07 - Another corrupt official, election tampering Refugio County - "Trust Me" failureCatherine Ansbro4 1 1-11-08 6:47 pm (FL) 9/07 - Volusia County again -- lots of defective memory cards... Volusia County - Voting system: Incident reportsWilliam Reese2 1 1-8-08 9:19 pm (FL) 10/07 - New machines, still not enough safeguards State of Florida - Voting systems: Transition to optical scan, issuesDon Powers2 1 1-8-08 12:00 am PC Magazine Article 09/12/07Don Powers2 1 1-7-08 10:45 pm (US) Can You Count On These Machines?Bev Harris 21 1 1-7-08 6:18 pm (US) Problems At Poll Permeate U.S. Political ProcessV. Kurt Bellman76 1 1-5-08 4:57 pm Legal Voters Thrown Off RollsV. Kurt Bellman7 1 1-3-08 11:15 am CNN: On the eve of Iowa caucus, some states give e-voting an 'F'...Russell Novkov2 1 1-2-08 3:42 pm (TX) 11/07 - Wharton County GOP will use paper ballots in primary... NEWS: Follow up on vote-flipping incidentLore2 1 1-1-08 3:35 pm (KY) 10/7 - Candidate for elections chief pleads guilty to forgery... Boone County - "Trust Me" FailureKathleen Wynne49 1 12-26-07 2:49 pm (US) 12/07 - FEC doors shut, 'No one left to answer phones'...Alan Brau4 1 12-25-07 8:29 pm (CO) 12/07 - Boulder: Stray marks caused decertificationBev Harris 1 1 12-23-07 9:49 pm (CO) 12/07 - Mesa: Commission defiant on vote machines NEWS: Resisting Colorado decertificationFran Fleming5 1 12-22-07 1:34 pm (AK) 12/07 - Impossible to tell whether 2004 count correct NEWS - Follow up on AZ Dem Party litigationBev Harris 1 1 12-21-07 7:05 am (CO) 12/07 - Denver: Voting gear out for count NEWS: Colo. decertification of Sequoia Julio Edwards1 1 12-18-07 6:41 am (US) 12/07 - Congressional watch tool for citizens PRESS RELEASE: New Freedom of Information toolBev Harris 1 1 12-11-07 7:20 am (PA) 11/07 - Philadelphia: Voter Fraud Allegations Again NEWS: Absentee ballot fraud allegationsV. Kurt Bellman21 1 12-7-07 2:02 pm (NJ) 12/07 - 'We are Neanderthals' - paper trail delayed again... NEWS: New Jersey paper trail statusBobby Arnold2 1 12-6-07 3:20 am (OH) 11/07 - Franklin County: Former elections official charged... NEWS: Election official corruptionBev Harris 2 1 12-2-07 7:50 am (OH) 11/07 - Township results flipped because of error (Lawrence Co... Lawrence County: Voting systems - Incident ReportBev Harris 4 1 11-23-07 2:00 pm (CT) 11/07 - Diebold/Premier machine miscount changes winner Greenwich: Voting systems - Incident reportsCatherine Ansbro4 1 11-23-07 1:47 pm (MS) 11/07 - New election ordered for Louise Linzy race Tunica County: Election incidentsBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 9:05 pm (NH) 11/07 - It's official: Jan. 8 primary date State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 8:28 pm (CA) 11/07 - Sec. State Bowen sues ES&S for $15 million State of California: Voting systems, ES&SBev Harris 3 1 11-21-07 9:09 pm (MI) 11/07 - It's back on: Mich. primary will proceed... State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of InformationBev Harris 1 1 11-21-07 10:38 am (MI) 11/07 - Michigan primary may not happen State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of Information Bev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:22 pm (NH) 11/07 - Pres primary date STILL not certain State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:06 pm (OH) 11/07 - Provisionals may alter outcome Clermont County: Provisional ballotsBev Harris 1 1 11-19-07 5:54 pm (TX) 11/07 - Alteration of live election data in Harris County... Harris County: Voting systems, "Trust Me"Russell Novkov12 1 11-15-07 9:18 pm (US) 11/07 - Sequoia voting systems under new ownership US - VendorsBev Harris 1 1 11-9-07 6:39 am (OH) 11/07 - Polls open later in ES&S location Putnam County - Voting Machines: Incident ReportsPatricia Berg1 1 11-7-07 4:34 am (FL) 10/07 - Appeals court rules The People "moot" Sarasota County - LitigationBev Harris 1 1 11-2-07 8:02 am (CT) 10/07 - Candidate's company will transport voting machines... New Britain - Chain of CustodyBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 11:22 am (IN) 10/07 - Polling locations reduced to four "vote centers"... Tippecanoe County - Access to PollsBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 8:12 am (FL) 10/07 - Wrong Ballots Sent To Miami Absentee Voters Miami-Dade County - Absentee / Mail-in Incident ReportBrant Lamb13 1 10-22-07 11:34 am (PA) 10/07 - County replacing WinVote Lackawanna County - Voting systems: Procurement Alan Brau43 1 10-18-07 7:56 pm (US) 9/07 - E-vote industry massaging itself in the media Voting systems: Security / Chain of CustodyBev Harris 52 1 10-14-07 11:07 am (OH) 10/07 - A funeral for a presidential election State of Ohio - Compliance, enforcement issuesAlan Brau3 1 10-11-07 4:32 pm (FL) 10/07 - Peculiar excuses block accountability for primary Martin County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-11-07 7:12 am (TX) 9/07 - Hilarious but improper: video of lawmakers cheat-voting... State of Texas - Noncompliance, enforcement issues with legislator voting rulesBrant Lamb11 1 10-3-07 5:06 am (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 testing continues... Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsRussell Novkov2 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (IN) 10/07 - Belly-up vendor, in come different machines Randolph County - Voting systems: ProcurementBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 report imminent Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:46 pm (US) 9/07 - If MS Excel bug = math errors, trust e-voting? US - Computer program: Incident reportBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:38 pm (NC) 9/07 - The registrar's secret lair Montgomery County - Chain of custodyBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 4:12 pm (NJ) 9/07 - Judge stalls on paper trail Mercer County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 3:46 pm (US) 9/07 - Less than 1/2 of military overseas votes counted US - Absentee / mail-in voting: Incidents, access problemsBev Harris 6 1 9-30-07 3:17 pm (GA) 9/07 - What's the punishment for throwing out 93,000 voter reg... Fulton County - Chain of custody / Privacy protection issuesBev Harris 1 1 9-28-07 9:12 am (US) 9/07 - Gird for massive new voting machine purchases: New stan... US - Voting systems: Standards, certification, procurementBrant Lamb16 1 9-27-07 5:02 am (PA) 9/07 County Commissioners' Assocation Opposes HR811 State of Pennsylvania - LegislationSamuel Scharff32 1 9-24-07 11:29 pm (CT) 9/07 - Voting rights activists express disappointment at CT s... State of Connecticut - Voting systems: Security Catherine Ansbro2 1 9-22-07 6:36 pm (NV) 9/07 - County to "prove Sequioa machines are secure"... Washoe County - Voting systems: SecurityBev Harris 1 1 9-22-07 9:43 am (IL) 9/07 - Indictment: Teamster Union vote rigging Teamster's Union [Chicago] - "Trust Me" failureBev Harris 1 1 9-8-07 4:48 pm (US) 2007 National news archive (see state foru... 130 24 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2006 National news archive (see state foru... 482 60 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2005 National news archive (see state foru... 310 152 10-11-07 12:24 pm (US) 2004 National news archive (see state forums for state news)... 77 42 10-11-07 12:24 pm Start New Thread http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/1954/1954.html Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post 2-5-08: What to watch for -- and do -- during & after Super Power T...allenfly15 1 2-12-08 12:32 am 1-29-08: Citizen's Guide to Following Vote Transport VehiclesJoel Morine31 1 2-10-08 7:18 am 1-29-08: Questions unfolding throughout New HampshireB Lindsey57 1 2-12-08 5:53 pm 1-24-08: Now posting - New Hampshire video evidenceNancy Tobi47 1 1-31-08 6:59 am 1-20-08: Holes hidden in plain sightCatherine Ansbro77 1 1-27-08 11:24 am 1-17-08: Ballot boxes found slit; NH stops putting ballots in vault; christine c reid264 1 2-13-08 8:21 pm 1-16-08: How New Hampshire is sizing upBrant Lamb172 1 2-4-08 4:39 am 1-15-08: Can recount chain of custody be rescued?Michael W Mather29 1 1-17-08 9:02 pm 1-12-08: Red Flags over New HampshireBrant Lamb153 1 1-22-08 4:41 am 1-10-08: Kucinich stepping into trap with recount?Catherine Ansbro138 1 1-15-08 12:56 pm 1-9-08: New England voting machine firm has executive criminal recordrush40 1 1-17-08 8:37 am 1-7-08: Silvestro the Cat & New Hampshire ElectionsBrett Woodward161 1 1-14-08 11:36 am 1-4-08: Eh? Iowa Republicans STILL missing 65 precincts in resultsJoel Morine41 1 1-9-08 4:04 am 1-3-08: What to do! Iowa Caucus instructions for everyoneChism Haworth26 1 1-4-08 3:09 pm 12-30-07: New problems identified with Iowa caucuses!David Luebbers48 1 1-13-08 4:16 am 12-14-07: UPDATE on Iowa Caucus ProceduresBev Harris 14 1 1-1-08 7:21 pm 11-29-07: MOONSHINE AMERICA – Collapse of the "Trust Me" modelJohn Dean15 1 1-13-08 1:06 pm 11-12-07: Unauthorized vote alterations on Texas iVotronic voting m...Bev Harris 8 1 11-16-07 4:06 pm 10-4-07: Connecticut Mayoral Scuffle Bev Harris 8 1 10-11-07 2:40 pm 9-19-07: Moonshine Elections 2 - Family Run GovermentJim March3 1 9-26-07 12:54 am 9-6-07: Moonshine Elections - The Hunt for Joe BoltonCatherine Ansbro15 1 9-14-07 9:36 pm 8-14-07: Moonshine Elections - Kentucky seriesBev Harris 4 1 9-14-07 7:38 am 8-3-07: California Decertifies, Boots InkaVote out of L.A. for goodBev Harris 15 1 8-6-07 1:31 pm 7-30-07: An Open Letter to Calif. Secretary of State BowenMark E. Smith18 1 8-7-07 9:33 am 7-17-07: HBO film on secret vote counting gets Emmy nominationRussell Novkov2 1 7-17-07 8:12 pm 7-13-07: Riverside proud to be dropped from "Top 2 Worst Places to ...Bev Harris 1 1 7-13-07 12:20 pm 7-12-07: California court may punish county for election records de...Russell Novkov2 1 7-12-07 9:04 pm 7-5-07: Debate w. a Chair #3: Will new elections "audits" help or h...Brant Lamb187 1 8-2-07 4:24 am 7-2-07: A preview on the audit debateV. Kurt Bellman62 1 7-7-07 1:39 pm 6-29-07: Debate with a Chair #2: Is no bill worse than a flawed bill?Udar Koschka35 2 7-21-07 6:04 am 6-28-07: Debate with a Chair (Part 1)Catherine Ansbro33 1 10-14-07 9:56 am 6-25-07: New Hampshire Sec. State rebukes attack on NH campaign fin...Bruce Sims12 1 6-27-07 10:39 am 6-10-07: Kucinich abandons support; for Holt Bill HR 811Catherine Ansbro13 1 6-24-07 2:30 am 5-30-07: (Calif.) The Voting Rights Obstacle Course - And the winne...Tom Courbat12 1 6-2-07 11:25 am 5-17-07: You have 2 weeks to restore your inalienable right to kic...Brant Lamb42 1 6-5-07 5:12 am 5-11-07: Uh-Oh -- HAMMERTIME! John C. Ervin12 1 6-14-07 2:54 am 5-8-07: U.S. Experiment Ready to Sail (Holt Bill out of committee)...Brant Lamb4 1 5-11-07 12:28 pm 4-9-07: Two voting products combine to steal your political privacyJohn Washburn23 1 4-26-07 2:13 pm 3-27-07 - Elections give you: The judge, the prosecutor and the she...Bev Harris 49 1 6-7-07 6:32 am 3-14-07: Riverside Rides Again ...Bev Harris 7 1 4-9-07 8:13 pm 3-9-07: The Black Box Voting Web site is changingVickie Karp16 1 3-21-07 6:03 am 2-20-07: Voting machines as a Ponzi SchemeBev Harris 77 1 3-16-07 3:48 pm 2-14-07: America's Funny Valentine - What is this romance with mach...Troy Seman2 1 2-15-07 12:14 pm 2-13-07: Agreement among groups as to Essential Revisions to HR 811Bob Roberts15 2 3-2-07 9:44 pm 2-8-07: Beware of the Bandwagon -- A concise list of problems with ...John C. Ervin12 1 2-14-07 5:48 pm 2-7-07: The Vu Memos - Cuyahoga Elections Director conversations wi...Catherine Ansbro5 1 2-8-07 2:01 pm 2-7-07: Son of Holt Bill: TechnoElection Dream Come True (But is it...Catherine Ansbro22 1 2-10-07 6:14 pm 2-6-07: New Rush Holt Bill Bev Harris4 1 2-6-07 10:42 am 2-5-07: Convicted Ohio elections workers ask for new trialKathleen Wynne6 1 2-6-07 7:38 am 2-1-07: Arizona computer logs show cheat-peeks at results, days bef...Gentry Lange4 1 3-16-07 8:43 am 1-30-07: HAVA -- The road to Boondoggle was paved with good intenti...Brant Lamb18 1 2-5-07 5:13 am 1-24-07: Two Ohio election workers found guilty; supervisors get of...Brant Lamb19 1 1-31-07 7:40 am 1-22-07: Diebold voting machines cost $2,000 more (each) in New Ham...Bev Harris4 1 1-29-07 9:09 am 1-20-07: Reports from the front lines - Kathleen Wynne video 'Best ...Kathleen Wynne7 1 1-21-07 3:39 pm 1-9-07: Vendor issues raised in Ohio, New HampshireBev Harris3 1 1-10-07 2:55 pm 12-30-06: Sign the REQUEST BY VOTERS --- Dear American Patriot, Samuel Scharff21 1 1-12-07 1:44 pm 12-22-06: Let's get down to the root of the problem: Freedom of Acc...Bev Harris1 1 12-22-06 3:23 pm 12-5-06: Government rejects NIST recommendations for paper trailCatherine Ansbro25 1 12-9-06 1:32 pm 11-22-06: ES&S serves up a Texas Turkey - Voting system stuffed wit...Greg Bodovsky15 1 12-13-06 7:43 pm 11-21-06: ES&S problem hit 34 counties in TexasBrant Lamb7 1 2-15-07 5:50 am 11-20-06: Black Box Voting receives new legal threats from ES&SJeffrey Ortiz21 1 12-13-06 7:34 pm 11-14-06: Arizona manual audit a farceDan Oetting9 1 11-18-06 2:39 pm 11-13-06: Sarasota! Florida! Never doubt that a small group of comm...Pat Vesely19 1 11-22-06 11:26 pm 11-13-06: Yes, the files on Slashdot are legit.Bev Harris23 1 11-27-06 6:48 am 11-9-06: A quick update on doingsBob Dean15 2 11-14-06 6:08 am 11-8-06: Rumsfeld replacement (Robert Gates) was director of voting...Bev Harris 93 2 1-6-08 8:49 am 11-8-06: The Sarasota Anomaly: Some say this is a smoking gun:Catherine Ansbro18 1 11-19-06 3:11 am 11-8-06: Black Box Voting to help citizens audit VIRGINIARoberta McKnight19 1 11-10-06 5:36 pm 11-7-06: What to expect -- and look for -- in the 2006 electionJanine L. Busald8 1 11-9-06 1:09 am 11-6-06: Ohio professor facing retaliatory (criminal) charges for a...Catherine Ansbro10 1 11-14-06 6:07 am 11-2-06: HBO "Hacking Democracy" to air tonight -- REVIEWSChipman Budlong71 7 11-11-06 12:23 pm 10-31-06: Reports from the front lines -- Citizens find critical se...suzanne warden15 1 11-6-06 7:10 am 10-27-06: Absentee voting is NOT advisable; Problems, things you sh...Gentry Lange17 2 3-16-07 8:54 am 10-15-06: Now we're getting somewhere -- Congressional hand counted...k.c.10 1 11-3-06 6:11 pm 10-6-06: 'The sheer number of legal/security violations is horrifyi...Jim March2 1 10-9-06 10:48 am 10-1-06: One on One with Cynthia McKinney -- Evidence, procedural p...Bev Harris7 1 10-10-06 9:56 am 9-27-06: Riverside California - One of the "Top 2" WORST PLACES TO ...Ginny Ross7 1 9-28-06 6:55 am 9-25-06: One-on-One - Allegan County Michigan citizens uncover issuesCatherine Ansbro7 1 9-27-06 2:52 pm 9-13-06: Paper Ballots Gaining Momentum - Court Decision, New Guide...John Heath5 1 10-2-06 5:55 pm 9-12-06: Election problems in the Sept. 12 primariesBev Harris1 1 9-12-06 12:12 pm 8-31-06: Stoopidest Sleepover Security Ever: Black Box Voting blows...V. Kurt Bellman19 1 9-20-06 12:00 pm 8-28-06: One-on-One -- Witness to vote-flipping: What should I do?Brian S16 2 11-7-06 4:49 pm 8-14-06: One on One Advice Comes Alive: How to stage an eventLinda Franz2 1 8-14-06 9:08 pm 8-11-06: One-on-One Advice Comes Alive Brant Lamb12 1 8-15-06 4:26 am 8-1-06: NOW IS THE TIME FOR YOUR 2 CENTS: Citizen Tool Kit to Take ...Dan Oetting73 2 8-26-06 5:42 pm 7-31-06: Georgia, Maryland Touch-screens -- New security defect evi...Jim March19 1 8-2-06 12:39 pm 7-27-06: Expensive, Insecure, Illegal, Unqualified and UnauditedRon Hammar12 2 8-26-06 4:32 pm 7-21-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Cuyahoga B.o.E. members call for Director ...John Washburn26 1 8-5-06 10:40 am 7-18-06: Georgia Election Malfunctions - Gird yourself for action, ...Brant Lamb24 1 9-5-06 4:46 am 7-17-06: The World's Quietest News Story: Kennedy Files Voting Mach...Linda Rogers4 1 7-29-06 9:07 am 7-10-06: Kentucky litigation - 'When computers fear jail, they'll b...Jenny L. Hurley6 1 7-12-06 8:37 am 07-08-06: Citizen Oversight - Pay Special Attention to Missing ItemsJody Holder19 1 7-12-06 4:20 pm 7-04-06: Black Box Voting's Declaration of IndependenceBev Harris19 1 7-15-06 1:40 pm Fourth of July Fireworks: Unredacted Hursti reports, photos releasedBrant Lamb44 1 7-12-06 5:20 am 6-27-06: Whatever happens in Utah elections - Capture on camera, audioV. Kurt Bellman11 1 6-29-06 10:44 am 6-26-06: The ultimate insult: Paper ballots entered into touch-screensTom Courbat16 1 6-28-06 1:42 pm 6-22-06: A 'Plan B' for voting machines: The National Hand Count Re...Bev Harris7 1 6-24-06 11:43 am 6-15-06: Solutions through citizen oversightBrant Lamb52 1 7-25-06 7:19 pm 6-12-06: Trouble seeks trouble - King County elections chief goes t...Tom Courbat8 1 6-21-06 6:08 pm 6-6-06: Hear the train a'comin' , Comin' round the bendBrant Lamb12 1 6-9-06 10:14 am 6-5-06: Citizens -- Here's how to watchdog electionBev Harris13 1 6-6-06 12:37 pm 5-23-06: Supplmental report adds new concerns to Hursti IIBev Harris51 1 7-1-06 10:49 am 5-19-06: Substitute 'L' for 'D' - Diebold claims Utah tests failed...Kathleen Wynne16 1 6-27-06 6:26 am 5-11-06: Three-level security flaws found in Diebold touch-screensRobert Sawdey182 1 6-7-06 11:52 am 5-10-06: Update on TSx reportCatherine Ansbro5 1 5-11-06 4:47 pm 5-10-06: As the Emery County findings evolve: Diebold's and Georgia...Joseph Hall5 1 5-11-06 2:15 pm 5-9-06: The Ohio Election BackwashAdele Eisner34 1 8-2-06 3:26 pm 5-4-06: Touch-screens fail security tests, Diebold retaliatessuhkara a yahweh`16 1 5-9-06 9:15 pm 5-4-06: Your chance to get evidence: WV, NE, KY, OR, PABev Harris1 1 5-4-06 9:13 am 5-2-06: Is the 2006 election train still on its tracks?John Washburn26 1 5-12-06 3:29 pm 4-24-06: Diebold whistleblower Stephen Heller compared to Daniel El...Russell Novkov2 1 4-24-06 3:06 pm 4-13-06: Last transcript - Calif. ITA hearings.John Washburn3 1 4-14-06 9:20 am 4-8-06: Why the Rush Holt bill (H.B. 550) is dangerousJonathan104 1 5-16-06 2:46 am 4-6-06: Utah Lt. Governor's office admits: some Diebold serial numb...ed hill32 1 4-10-06 7:24 pm 4-5-06: Transcript: Wyle Labs thinks Hursti Hack means 'the system ...John Washburn11 1 4-6-06 7:59 am 4-4-06: More Voting Machine Test Lab TranscriptsBev Harris12 1 4-6-06 11:32 pm 4-3-06: ALERT - elections officials: Diebold making 'visits' to you...Bruce Sims5 1 4-4-06 11:08 am 3-31-06: Bravissima! Calif. Senate Elections Committee grills two ...Catherine Ansbro28 1 4-12-06 1:59 pm 3-29-06: FL Attorney General Hits Voting Machine Vendors With Inves...Bev Harris4 1 3-30-06 10:39 am 3-28-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Diebold attempts to explain TSx memory def...Bev Harris34 1 4-3-06 9:17 am 03-18-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Diebold TSx touch-screen study (Part I)...Joseph Hall50 1 4-7-06 10:29 am 3-17-2006: New Black Box Voting report to be issued on Diebold TSx ...Jody Holder11 1 3-19-06 11:34 pm 3-11-06: The Stephen Heller Legal Defense FundJohn Washburn6 1 3-12-06 8:23 pm 3-8-06: Ion Sancho pits his lawyers against DieboldPat Vesely10 1 3-14-06 2:02 pm 3-3-06: While Florida vindicates Ion Sancho, Jeb Bush threatens Sa...Daniel R Spak29 1 3-19-06 5:45 pm 2-28-06: Take action NOW: Bullies pounding on whistleblowerRobert Sawdey11 1 3-9-06 5:47 pm 2-23-06: Someone accessed 40 Palm Beach County voting machines Nov ...Bev Harris110 1 3-9-06 7:30 am 2-21-06: An open letter to Bruce McPherson and the citizens of the ...Joycelynn Straight22 1 2-27-06 9:01 pm 2-17-06: BREAKING: Calif. Sec. State certifies entire Diebold produ...Bev Harris52 1 4-3-06 10:20 am 2-17-06: Election family tree: Who got us into this and how did the...Catherine Ansbro4 1 3-30-06 10:40 am 2-11-06: Voting machine examiners chickening out on Senate investig...Ron Crane24 1 2-18-06 1:27 pm 2-6-06: Landes takes e-voting to Supreme CourtV. Kurt Bellman24 1 4-19-06 10:33 am 2-6-06: Diebold agrees to waive proprietary claims to GEMS database...Marian Beddill12 1 2-11-06 1:38 pm 2-5-06: What protects your personal information once it enters e-el...Paul Lehto70 1 7-21-06 1:17 pm 2-2-06: Embezzler Jeff Dean remote accessed Calif. counties for 200...Kathleen Wynne4 1 2-2-06 8:38 am 2-1-06: Voting system examiners blocked from telling what they know?Byron Hale21 1 2-6-06 3:16 am 1-31-06: Diebold anticipates $100 to $125 million in 2006 voting sy...Bev Harris1 1 1-31-06 8:56 am 1-26-06: Elections Programmer Jeff Dean worked for same firm as for...Bev Harris25 1 1-27-06 12:45 pm 1-24-06: Public Records Get The Big Chill: Alaska's Voters vs Diebo...Jim March5 1 1-31-06 2:29 pm 1-13-06: ES&S reneges on Leon County deal 2 days before HAVA deadl...Catherine Ansbro33 1 1-17-06 1:20 am 1-9-2006: DuPage County Elections paid $30,000 to Republican politi...Bev Harris12 1 2-3-06 8:20 am 1-5-06: Wisconsin moves toward public source, then guts itJohn Washburn10 1 1-5-06 4:21 pm 1-3-2006: Hold on to your lugnuts, ES&S and Sequoia may risk Hurst...Brant Lamb33 1 1-25-06 4:56 am 12-30-05: Roll up your sleeves, we ain't done yet!BBV Admin1 1 12-30-05 4:26 pm 12-28-2005: Pennsylvania declines some Diebold but reveals an odd biasArnold Peckerman24 1 12-31-05 2:17 pm 12-23-05: ES&S under fire in CaliforniaEdward Robles5 1 12-26-05 5:36 am 12-20-05: California 'Hack' test stalled as Diebold certification d...Brant Lamb116 1 1-25-06 1:27 pm 12-13-05: Devastating hack proven - Leon County dumps DieboldSamuel Scharff97 1 5-29-06 9:25 pm 12-9-05: Diebold hack test -- Sec. State / Black Box lawyer square offJim March6 1 12-12-05 3:01 pm 12-7-05: Diebold stockholder suit - here's some ammoJim March7 1 12-8-05 9:37 am 12-4-05: 'Leave it up to us, we know best' say officialsBBV Admin27 2 12-15-05 4:17 am 11-30-05: Nope, the hack test won't be todayCatherine Ansbro25 1 1-3-06 12:51 am 11-28-05: Latest on California hack situationBruce Sims45 1 11-30-05 4:40 pm 11-24-05: Turkey Day leftovers: No thanks for stuffing elections wi...Edward Robles2 1 11-27-05 7:55 am 11-23-05: Flag on the play - Calif. Sec. State official calls foul ...Catherine Ansbro17 1 11-29-05 10:18 am 11-22-05: California invites Black Box Voting to hack Diebold votin...John Washburn31 1 12-9-05 8:23 am 11-22-2005: Updates on felons - Jeffrey Dean and John ElderBBV Admin7 1 11-22-05 9:37 am 11-21-05: Diebold violates court orderBBV Admin10 1 11-28-05 8:27 am 11-18-05: Fasten your seatbelts - It's time to bring this thing in ...Edward Robles7 1 11-27-05 9:12 am 11-15-05: FEC Investigating rapper P. Diddy (but not Blackwell or M...Edward Robles5 1 11-27-05 9:16 am 11-13-05: Detroit, Michigan elections are now a significant concernBBV Admin11 1 11-23-05 5:16 am 11-9-05: Los Angeles County has the dog & pony show downEdward Robles2 1 11-27-05 9:33 am 11-8-05: Share your observations on voting today hereKathleen Wynne10 1 11-10-05 9:15 am 11-6-05: Two state elections heads resign in FloridaBBV Admin6 1 11-6-05 5:11 am 11-4-05: Mail-in votes at higher risk with Diebold systemsBBV Admin1 1 11-4-05 8:00 am 11-3-05: The first public examination under the 15004 lawJohn Washburn5 1 11-6-05 6:41 am 10-28-05: Blackwell Blunders on Voting Machine ExaminationJohn Washburn14 1 10-31-05 11:23 am 10-26-05: The 'Perimeter Defense' - Follies and FailuresBBV Admin7 1 10-31-05 3:57 pm 10-21-05: GAO & NIST - Voting machine security finally goes mainstr...From the Mailbag10 1 10-29-05 11:39 am 10-9-05: VotoScope audit tool will catch Hart Intercivic bugBev Harris22 1 10-12-05 1:06 pm 10-8-05: Investors considering Diebold class action suitBev Harris1 1 10-8-05 3:08 pm 10-5-05: Diebold Lies Move Up the LadderBev Harris5 1 10-8-05 3:21 pm 9-19-2005: Carter-Baker Panel Report: Proposed Reforms Miss the BoatBrad Friedman52 1 10-3-05 12:02 pm 9-10-2005: Here's your chance to 'Look inside the Black Box':...alex baxter21 1 11-1-05 4:23 am 9-7-2005: Digital Image ballot scanners -- good or bad?Brant Lamb19 1 10-5-05 4:41 am 8-25-2005: Voting Rights Act expiration 2007Admin3 1 8-25-05 9:56 am 8-15-05: Election Reform -- Impending ShuffleCatherine_a107 1 8-25-05 1:51 pm 8-13-2005: If this doesn't get your blood boiling...Ubetchaiam9 1 8-15-05 11:24 am 8-10-2005: Mississippi Paper Trail ImminentCatherine Ansbro18 1 12-14-05 2:47 am 8-9-2005: Exactly what we don't want: Our election on Diebold's ser...John Howard13 1 10-5-05 8:20 pm 8-8-2005: Arcata, (CA) seeks to wrest election control from corpora...jimmarch6 1 8-12-05 12:33 am 8-5-05: 'Think Outside the Black Box' - ONLINE THINK TANK Admin5 1 8-17-05 7:46 am 8-3-05: San Diego backs down on charges against BBV director Jim MarchUbetchaiam32 1 8-22-05 12:01 pm 7-29-2005: Mississippi, listen up: California just rejected the TSxadmin17 1 8-13-05 8:15 pm 7-28-05: In his own words: Jim March on taking back his civil rightsmymarkx11 1 7-29-05 11:46 am 7-26-2005: BBV Board Member Arrested in San Diego for Viewing Vote-...cleanbean63 1 7-29-05 4:17 pm 7-25-2005: Wondering about mail-in voting? Diebold's new VoteRemote...Catherine Ansbro28 1 3-30-06 12:43 pm 7-21-2005: ES&S, Diebold lobbyists had ties to bribery investigatio...mary_ann9 1 7-31-05 12:00 am 7-20-2005: Internal documents reveal more Diebold ethics problemsadmin4 1 7-20-05 7:24 am 7-18-2005: Are The Lights Going Out In Georgia?admin5 1 7-22-05 3:14 pm 7-17-2005: Gallina (Diebold) reportedly paid Blackwell, GOP cronies...admin1 1 7-17-05 12:07 pm 7-11-2005: Case Against Diebold and Florida Division of Electionskathleen_wynne3 1 7-13-05 9:32 am 7-4-2005: The Black Box ReportJohn Dean36 1 5-8-06 6:05 pm 7-3-2005: Diebold accounting mistake -- SEC stuff may be a biggieadmin11 1 7-4-05 10:58 pm 7-1-2005: July 4 Security Alert for Diebold Optical Scanscatherine_a17 1 7-5-05 1:29 am 6-24-2005: Black Box Voting Litigation Fund LaunchedBev Harris2 1 2-3-06 8:22 am 6-17-05: Report on Calif. meeting -- Decertify Diebold?ubetchaiam11 1 7-21-05 2:37 pm 6-8-2005: Palm Beach County fails auditlinda_franz7 1 6-15-05 8:29 am 5-27-05: Optical scan system hacked (3 ways) - BBV ExclusiveBrant Lamb73 1 8-9-06 11:06 am 5-9-05: Consumer Report Series -- Following the Money Trail – Part Iadmin1 1 5-9-05 3:18 pm 5-6-04: $45m (Diebold?) contract flying under radar in Cook County ...admin2 1 5-6-05 2:53 pm 5-11-05: CANCELLED - Call to action May 19, Sacramentoadmin1 1 5-6-05 11:05 am 5-04-05 – Easier Hacking Access Sneaks in w. ADA Compliance Measuresadmin1 1 5-4-05 9:25 pm 4-24-05: LA's InkaVote system tied to Malaysian gambling outfitadmin1 1 4-24-05 12:43 pm 4-20-2005: Paper trail advocates - The devil in the detailsadmin1 1 4-20-05 11:54 am 4-18-2005: Diebold Lobbyist Documents Reveal Problemsadmin1 1 4-18-05 9:54 am 3-8-2005: Hack of Real-Life Voting System Demonstratedadmin1 1 3-9-05 12:51 pm 2-22-2005: Activating the Eagles -- Events this weekend in Californiaadmin1 1 2-22-05 5:08 pm 2-21-2005: Snohomish County (WA) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 4:51 pm 2-21-2005: Orange County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 12:57 pm 2-21-2005: Broward County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 12:14 pm 2-21-2005: Palm Beach County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 11:04 am 2-21-2005: Volusia County (FL) Updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 7:02 am 2-1-2005: Black Box Voting donates $2000 to Ohio lawyersadmin1 1 2-1-05 2:51 pm 1-28-05: Eagles rolling up sleeves in Ohio, Florida, Californiaadmin1 1 1-28-05 6:30 am 1-20-05: BULLETIN: California Panel OKs Voter Privacy Removaladmin1 1 1-20-05 6:05 pm 1-18-05: Consumer Protection lawsuit activated against Dieboldadmin1 1 1-19-05 4:43 am 1-17-05: Black Box Voting Document Archiveadmin1 1 1-17-05 1:42 pm 1-10-05: Exposing the Crypto Solutionadmin1 1 1-11-05 6:20 am 1-6-05: Constitutional Equal Protection Amendment for Voters?admin1 1 1-11-05 6:15 am 1-5-05: Election Misconduct as a Public Records Crisisadmin1 1 1-11-05 6:10 am 1-5-05: Update from Washington D.C.admin1 1 1-11-05 6:01 am 12-30-2004: Volunteer Actions -- Activating the Eaglesadmin1 1 1-11-05 5:50 am 12-29-04: Update on 'Help America Audit'admin1 1 1-11-05 5:44 am 12-28-04: Update for donors, and a look to 2005admin1 1 1-11-05 5:35 am 11-18-2004: Volunteer actions -- How to 'Be the Media'admin1 1 1-11-05 5:56 am Start New Thread Mainstream News Reports Black Box Voting » Latest News » Mainstream News Reports « Previous Next » Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post Dean Logan Says Unaffiliated WriteIns will be Checkedchristine c reid14 1 2-15-08 10:34 am New York Times re Holt BillV. Kurt Bellman26 1 2-8-08 1:57 pm AP Incorrectly calls Missouri for ClintonBill Bowen1 1 2-7-08 8:04 am San Fran CA-KSFO-AM reports Repub registration problemsNancy Tobi9 1 2-7-08 5:49 am Massachusetts results via your friends at LHSMike LaBonte10 1 2-7-08 5:24 am NJ Voting delay included Gov. CorzineMichael W Mather2 1 2-6-08 1:17 pm (CA) 2/08 - Voting machine probs delay Sacramento countPerry Duke9 1 2-5-08 6:34 pm (FL) 1/08 - More Florida voting machine problemsHal Guentert8 1 2-2-08 7:19 pm (FL) 1/08 - Final Florida results inkaren reineke11 1 2-1-08 4:25 pm (CO) 1/15 Democrats Ask Coffman to ResignFran Fleming1 1 2-1-08 9:41 am (FL) 1/08 - Problems already with voting machinesBev Harris 1 1 1-29-08 10:08 am (CO) Paper ballots win over RitterCatherine Ansbro3 1 1-29-08 2:16 am (MI) 12/07 - Proposition for new way to do primaries NEWS: Reform pres. candidate selection processCatherine Ansbro11 1 1-29-08 2:14 am Americans Abroad Can Now Vote Onlinesam lark7 1 1-26-08 3:49 pm (SC) 1/19/08 - Problems at polling locationsts taylor4 1 1-24-08 9:16 pm Feedback appreciated as this unfolds...Bruce Sims2 1 1-24-08 1:52 pm (Ohio) ACLU files suit to block paper ballots New paper ballots ca...Roger Wood20 2 1-20-08 9:43 pm REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER: Election Fraud RoundtableV. Kurt Bellman10 1 1-18-08 7:05 am (CO) Legislators lose their confidence in CoffmanCatherine Ansbro13 1 1-17-08 4:01 pm Olbermann Report !! On Voting Sue West6 1 1-17-08 3:53 pm GOP Figure Contracted to Deliver E-Voting Machines in MarylandAlex Laflamme1 1 1-17-08 9:43 am (NH) Experts skeptical of N.H. ballot-count conspiracy theoryBill Bowen60 1 1-16-08 10:37 pm Making votes countFran Fleming2 1 1-16-08 12:00 pm Ron Paul says in regard to New Hampshire voteDavid Evans1 1 1-13-08 8:32 am Diebold Changing its Buisness name Catherine Ansbro2 1 1-12-08 5:20 am (NH) 1/08 - Man plans recount of Republican vote in N.H. primary...Russell Novkov7 1 1-11-08 11:03 pm (TX) 10/07 - Another corrupt official, election tampering Refugio County - "Trust Me" failureCatherine Ansbro4 1 1-11-08 6:47 pm (FL) 9/07 - Volusia County again -- lots of defective memory cards... Volusia County - Voting system: Incident reportsWilliam Reese2 1 1-8-08 9:19 pm (FL) 10/07 - New machines, still not enough safeguards State of Florida - Voting systems: Transition to optical scan, issuesDon Powers2 1 1-8-08 12:00 am PC Magazine Article 09/12/07Don Powers2 1 1-7-08 10:45 pm (US) Can You Count On These Machines?Bev Harris 21 1 1-7-08 6:18 pm (US) Problems At Poll Permeate U.S. Political ProcessV. Kurt Bellman76 1 1-5-08 4:57 pm Legal Voters Thrown Off RollsV. Kurt Bellman7 1 1-3-08 11:15 am CNN: On the eve of Iowa caucus, some states give e-voting an 'F'...Russell Novkov2 1 1-2-08 3:42 pm (TX) 11/07 - Wharton County GOP will use paper ballots in primary... NEWS: Follow up on vote-flipping incidentLore2 1 1-1-08 3:35 pm (KY) 10/7 - Candidate for elections chief pleads guilty to forgery... Boone County - "Trust Me" FailureKathleen Wynne49 1 12-26-07 2:49 pm (US) 12/07 - FEC doors shut, 'No one left to answer phones'...Alan Brau4 1 12-25-07 8:29 pm (CO) 12/07 - Boulder: Stray marks caused decertificationBev Harris 1 1 12-23-07 9:49 pm (CO) 12/07 - Mesa: Commission defiant on vote machines NEWS: Resisting Colorado decertificationFran Fleming5 1 12-22-07 1:34 pm (AK) 12/07 - Impossible to tell whether 2004 count correct NEWS - Follow up on AZ Dem Party litigationBev Harris 1 1 12-21-07 7:05 am (CO) 12/07 - Denver: Voting gear out for count NEWS: Colo. decertification of Sequoia Julio Edwards1 1 12-18-07 6:41 am (US) 12/07 - Congressional watch tool for citizens PRESS RELEASE: New Freedom of Information toolBev Harris 1 1 12-11-07 7:20 am (PA) 11/07 - Philadelphia: Voter Fraud Allegations Again NEWS: Absentee ballot fraud allegationsV. Kurt Bellman21 1 12-7-07 2:02 pm (NJ) 12/07 - 'We are Neanderthals' - paper trail delayed again... NEWS: New Jersey paper trail statusBobby Arnold2 1 12-6-07 3:20 am (OH) 11/07 - Franklin County: Former elections official charged... NEWS: Election official corruptionBev Harris 2 1 12-2-07 7:50 am (OH) 11/07 - Township results flipped because of error (Lawrence Co... Lawrence County: Voting systems - Incident ReportBev Harris 4 1 11-23-07 2:00 pm (CT) 11/07 - Diebold/Premier machine miscount changes winner Greenwich: Voting systems - Incident reportsCatherine Ansbro4 1 11-23-07 1:47 pm (MS) 11/07 - New election ordered for Louise Linzy race Tunica County: Election incidentsBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 9:05 pm (NH) 11/07 - It's official: Jan. 8 primary date State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 8:28 pm (CA) 11/07 - Sec. State Bowen sues ES&S for $15 million State of California: Voting systems, ES&SBev Harris 3 1 11-21-07 9:09 pm (MI) 11/07 - It's back on: Mich. primary will proceed... State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of InformationBev Harris 1 1 11-21-07 10:38 am (MI) 11/07 - Michigan primary may not happen State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of Information Bev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:22 pm (NH) 11/07 - Pres primary date STILL not certain State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:06 pm (OH) 11/07 - Provisionals may alter outcome Clermont County: Provisional ballotsBev Harris 1 1 11-19-07 5:54 pm (TX) 11/07 - Alteration of live election data in Harris County... Harris County: Voting systems, "Trust Me"Russell Novkov12 1 11-15-07 9:18 pm (US) 11/07 - Sequoia voting systems under new ownership US - VendorsBev Harris 1 1 11-9-07 6:39 am (OH) 11/07 - Polls open later in ES&S location Putnam County - Voting Machines: Incident ReportsPatricia Berg1 1 11-7-07 4:34 am (FL) 10/07 - Appeals court rules The People "moot" Sarasota County - LitigationBev Harris 1 1 11-2-07 8:02 am (CT) 10/07 - Candidate's company will transport voting machines... New Britain - Chain of CustodyBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 11:22 am (IN) 10/07 - Polling locations reduced to four "vote centers"... Tippecanoe County - Access to PollsBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 8:12 am (FL) 10/07 - Wrong Ballots Sent To Miami Absentee Voters Miami-Dade County - Absentee / Mail-in Incident ReportBrant Lamb13 1 10-22-07 11:34 am (PA) 10/07 - County replacing WinVote Lackawanna County - Voting systems: Procurement Alan Brau43 1 10-18-07 7:56 pm (US) 9/07 - E-vote industry massaging itself in the media Voting systems: Security / Chain of CustodyBev Harris 52 1 10-14-07 11:07 am (OH) 10/07 - A funeral for a presidential election State of Ohio - Compliance, enforcement issuesAlan Brau3 1 10-11-07 4:32 pm (FL) 10/07 - Peculiar excuses block accountability for primary Martin County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-11-07 7:12 am (TX) 9/07 - Hilarious but improper: video of lawmakers cheat-voting... State of Texas - Noncompliance, enforcement issues with legislator voting rulesBrant Lamb11 1 10-3-07 5:06 am (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 testing continues... Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsRussell Novkov2 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (IN) 10/07 - Belly-up vendor, in come different machines Randolph County - Voting systems: ProcurementBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 report imminent Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:46 pm (US) 9/07 - If MS Excel bug = math errors, trust e-voting? US - Computer program: Incident reportBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:38 pm (NC) 9/07 - The registrar's secret lair Montgomery County - Chain of custodyBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 4:12 pm (NJ) 9/07 - Judge stalls on paper trail Mercer County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 3:46 pm (US) 9/07 - Less than 1/2 of military overseas votes counted US - Absentee / mail-in voting: Incidents, access problemsBev Harris 6 1 9-30-07 3:17 pm (GA) 9/07 - What's the punishment for throwing out 93,000 voter reg... Fulton County - Chain of custody / Privacy protection issuesBev Harris 1 1 9-28-07 9:12 am (US) 9/07 - Gird for massive new voting machine purchases: New stan... US - Voting systems: Standards, certification, procurementBrant Lamb16 1 9-27-07 5:02 am (PA) 9/07 County Commissioners' Assocation Opposes HR811 State of Pennsylvania - LegislationSamuel Scharff32 1 9-24-07 11:29 pm (CT) 9/07 - Voting rights activists express disappointment at CT s... State of Connecticut - Voting systems: Security Catherine Ansbro2 1 9-22-07 6:36 pm (NV) 9/07 - County to "prove Sequioa machines are secure"... Washoe County - Voting systems: SecurityBev Harris 1 1 9-22-07 9:43 am (IL) 9/07 - Indictment: Teamster Union vote rigging Teamster's Union [Chicago] - "Trust Me" failureBev Harris 1 1 9-8-07 4:48 pm (US) 2007 National news archive (see state foru... 130 24 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2006 National news archive (see state foru... 482 60 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2005 National news archive (see state foru... 310 152 10-11-07 12:24 pm (US) 2004 National news archive (see state forums for state news)... 77 42 10-11-07 12:24 pm Start New Thread 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review Reviews Voted Most Helpful Votes are counted and displayed within 24 hours HM 1355196 37% Similar To You HM 1355196's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is an excellent documentary that I think every American should see before they vote again. This is not a movie about Bush vs. Kerry or Republicans vs. Democrats. Its about our current voting system and exposing a multitude of problems with that system as demonstrated in the 2004 election. We are told "EVERY VOTE COUNTS" and this documentary exposes the corruption, mistruths, and shameful negligence and mishandling of these "VOTES" in a way that cannot be denied nor ignored - unless you don't watch it for yourself. 73 out of 78 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful TerBo 40% Similar To You TerBo's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is a must-see documentary, especially for those still doubtful about whether elections in this country can be tampered with. The answer is yes, yes, yes!!! Kudos to Bev Harris who has dedicated years to exposing the corruption surrounding electronic voting. Get this. After Hacking Democracy's premiere on HBO, Harris received death threats. That's how risky and powerful her work is. 67 out of 77 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Shiftdnb 47% Similar To You Shiftdnb's other reviews > 4.0 Stars This is an amazing documentary showing that there are problems with the way we vote in America. When a normal everyday citizen gets up and challenges the system, you see how the system fights back. This woman doesn't give up like most of us would and shows us and one election official in Florida that the way our voting system was run and still is, has errors. 29 out of 36 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Most Recent Reviews SG 178412 23% Similar To You SG 178412's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Anyone who cares at all about the future of democracy in America (R or D or whatever else party affiliation you choose) NEEDS to see this movie. 1 out of 1 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful grw 970297 20% Similar To You grw 970297's other reviews > 5.0 Stars If our so-called government doesn't fix the problems exposed in this excellent documentary, our democracy no longer will exist. Abolish electronic voting machines!! I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Professional Bum 63% Similar To You Professional ...'s other reviews > 5.0 Stars If you are an American & have the ability to vote, please do yourself a favor and put this in your queue immediately(especially since this is an election year). This wonderful documentary proves my point that we have the best democracy that money can buy, along with our judicial system. This film is more frightening than any horror film I've seen, because THIS IS REAL! And this is movie biased? Not at all. It's an absolute eye opener that shows that your vote really doesn't count; and make sure you watch the deleted scenes(another 33 minutes of fantastic footage). 1 out of 1 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews hawk5391 58% Similar To You hawk5391's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Even though I also watched the original slasher classic Black Christmas, this was the scariest movie I saw over the Christmas break. Although the filmmakers obviously have every reason to sensationalize potential problems with electronic voting systems ("good news is no news," right?), the implications here are frightening. Not only did Bev Harris (founder of a non-partisan watchdog group) find voting machine code unprotected on the internet, she was able to successfully hack it and prove that results could be manipulated (you can watch this being done in a matter of seconds in this film). The lack of oversight of the companies who control the majority of electronic voting is astounding, almost as bad as the sloppy manner in which our government oversees the elections themselves. 10 out of 10 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Cassun 53% Similar To You Cassun's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Probably the scariest movie I've watched in a long time. The production value isn't good, but its worth sitting through to find out just how easy it would be for just one person with an agenda to manipulate the outcome of an election. 9 out of 12 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful LR 572736 43% Similar To You LR 572736's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Politics in America is scarey enough, but when you see what is going on with our elections system, you will just go through the roof. We have hoped through the last few centuries that a government of the people, by the people and for the people would not parish from the face of the earth, and that America would be its shining example. After viewing this flick, you will realize just how tarnished our example has become. We have realized in the past decades, that money rules, and it just feels like our votes don't count, only the money that backs our politicians. Only the corporations and special interests have access to the politicians these days, not the people that vote. This picture goes a long way to explaining how that happens. After realizing the truths in this documentary, I feel even more helpless and useless to change a corrupt government by my vote. Did my vote get counted? How would I even know? The facts put forth in this program are just about incredible, but you come away realizing their powerful credibility. I wondered why their hasn't been criminal prosecution of the election fraud that is running rampant in our country today? Where are prosecuters? Why aren't elections officials who ignore our right to have our votes counted, recounter and certified being placed on trial for crimes against the electorate? You owe it to yourself and your country to see this documentary long before the next election. Don't miss this one! 8 out of 9 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful CP 1799900 36% Similar To You CP 1799900's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Wow. I just finished watching this documentary, and I can't believe what I heard and saw. This is not another Michael Moore speculative film that makes assumptions with no factual evidence. This is incredible. Everyone should see this film. It is truly an amazing look inside of our election system. 8 out of 9 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review SN 25968 62% Similar To You SN 25968's other reviews > 5.0 Stars We must all see this movie. It's not JUST about elections. It's about the undermining of our society, the breakdown. My opinion is that we should get away from secret voting and out into the public. Democracy is where WE THE PEOPLE elect our officials. You must see this to know why I write this. 4 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful JR 1824621 61% Similar To You JR 1824621's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is what makes America great: a woman, with a full life, puts it all behind her because she has come across the ultimate injustice and knows that she must right it. This is the story of the creation of the group and webpage BlackBoxVoting.com Having found the Diebold's source code, a code that not even the President of the United States can see, Bev Harris takes the code to an expert. What is revealed causes Harris to criss cross America, to prove the fact that Diebold had literally hijacked democracy. Although it's possible, it's difficult to believe that anyone can think that the 2004 Presidential Election wasn't rigged after viewing this film. A 'must see' for every American. 4 out of 4 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PW 51% Similar To You PW's other reviews > 5.0 Stars One of the scariest movies I've ever seen... because it's true. If you liked 'All the presidents men' or 'The Insider' You'll like this movie. Actually come to think of it, what this story needs is a treatment like the above mentioned movies so the message could have a broader appeal beyond this documentary. 5 out of 6 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful FV 1232392 44% Similar To You FV 1232392's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Highly recommedable as the documentary reveals what we all have been suspecting and fearing in an objective and somewhat scientific way. It is quite timely, and I think we can all relate to the topic at hand. I was touched by the reaction of some of the people in the movie when they proved how the voting system can be hacked without much effort 4 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Steve Smith 38% Similar To You Steve Smith's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Unbelievable. That's how I describe this excellent documentary. Every citizen of the USA owes it to themselves to watch this documentary. It is just shocking. It calls into question everything we know about how our votes are recorded in this country. My jaw literally dropped when I saw one part of it. I won't ruin it for those who haven't seen it. You MUST watch this! 4 out of 4 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Ben5765 35% Similar To You Ben5765's other reviews > 4.0 Stars This film is all about voting machines and how votes are tabulated. It makes mincemeat of the Diebold Corporation, manufacturer of a large percentage of the electronic voting machines used in the United States. It reveals Diebold officials making lie after lie about the security of their machines. The makers of the film meticulously document how, using Diebold's machines and data cards, someone with just a basic understanding of the technology involved (including, certainly, any Diebold employee) could rig the vote count, on one machine or on thousands of them, with absolutely no record that the rigging was ever done. The film also reveals how Diebold's chief executive officer was (and maybe still is) a large contributor to the Republican Party. He once wrote a letter stating that he would "deliver" Ohio's electoral votes in the 2004 presidential election for George W. Bush. The film later shows how his company managed to persuade Cuyahoga County, Ohio (where Cleveland is) to buy its machines. Maybe there is nothing fishy going on there, but appearances matter! Lest the film be seen as partisan, it features, among others, a Republican office-seeker from Louisiana who, after losing her race, went to view a demonstration of the machines that the voters used. As part of the demonstration she pressed the button next to her name, and the machine registered a vote for her opponent. Hmmm. She was understandably troubled. Moreover, the film points out that in many parts of the country it is in fact the local Republican Party that is wary of electronic voting machines, not the Democrats. Hacking Democracy also reveals problems with punch card voting systems--problems that dwarf the famous "hanging chad" problem of the 2000 presidential vote count in Florida. The film's message is distressing, but it is one all American citizens should hear and see. 5 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AdriH 34% Similar To You AdriH's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Yes, the documentary could use a bit of editing, but the points raised are valid enough to keep it interesting. Instead of taking a partisan view on the movie, realize how intensly frightening this movie really is. Should it be just one grandmother's job to inform us how we're being duped? No. It's our responsibility as citizens to stay informed and demand voting accuracy. 5 out of 7 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful DM 1548398 12% Similar To You DM 1548398's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Frightening and timely documentary that exposes the very painful truth about the U.S. electoral system and vote count fraud. A must see if you plan to vote ever! 5 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PM 748973 — —% Similar To You PM 748973's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This presentation should be shown to every high school junior and senior. Maybe they will be able to bring about the changes needed to restore our country to what it once was. Our democratic republic is long gone. 6 out of 6 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review Lee Anne and Tim 64% Similar To You Lee Anne and ...'s other reviews > 5.0 Stars Every voter should see this film. It leaves you with your head shaking, wondering how the history of the last 8 years might read if the vote-tampering exposed in Hacking Democracy hadnt been possible. Also a testament to how one regular person can make a difference, this documentary is very well done. Youll hate what you learn. 6 out of 10 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful yla 83539 39% Similar To You yla 83539's other reviews > 5.0 Stars SA 1674508, Yazheirx, JR 65420, RS 305556, their reviews are absolutely the threat that we all have about democracy. It is because their kind of ignorance that this movie is a 5 star and a must for every single human being to watch and learn. There is no excuse for any voting system to be too technical, too complex, too secret that we cannot prove what the votes were years from when the votes were taken. Not even 50 years, not even 100 years, not even 1000 years, not ever. For anyone to suggest that the electronic voting system is not possible to understand and to do a documentary for by a handful of heroic citizens, it is an insult to this country and democracy. Let these be the commandments of election: 1) No voting methods should be more complicated than what pen/pencil can do on a ballot. 2) Vote handling in any election process should be transparent to the public no matter when, why, how, what, who. 3) Only 100% accuracy should be accepted. Anything less then 100% should be recounted no matter how many times, how long it takes, and how much it cost to be 100% accurate. 4) Without 100% accuracy, election cannot be concluded. Another election should be conducted immediately without further delay. 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful ayi 554466 35% Similar To You ayi 554466's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Factual information clearly presented. I fear it is all too true and I fear for the next election. 5 out of 8 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AL 1659593 33% Similar To You AL 1659593's other reviews > 2.0 Stars For content, I'd give it 3 stars. It was an eye-opening look at the problems at the flaws of the "touch screen" and memory card system. What turned me off was the overboard emotions and cheesy speeches from the women of the watchdog groups. 4 out of 6 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful TD 1852913 31% Similar To You TD 1852913's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I simply cannot believe this is true. I simply cannot believe the voting process is so secretive! I am still in High School and I could probably devise a system more secure than what every American trusts to count their votes! Every American owes it to themselves to watch this incredible docudrama of corporate greed, secrecy, corruption, and lies. Every American. 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AK 817970 29% Similar To You AK 817970's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I would have to agree with everyone else in stating this a must see film for everyone. I was shocked and surprised at how poorly designed the electronic voting system is. How corrupt the political voting process is. Without this video no one would have seen the voting process. Watch this film you won't regret it. 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful jes 881880 26% Similar To You jes 881880's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Eye opening. My question is, "Why haven't criminal investigations been started?!?" I agree with the majority of the comments saying we should all see this movie; i would add it's imperative we do something with what we know after watching it. Hold our representitives accountable!!! 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful KS 608754 24% Similar To You KS 608754's other reviews > 5.0 Stars If this doesn't make people realize that we need to change how our elections are held, nothing will! Republicans and Democrats should be concerned...ALL AMERICANS should be concerned and angry. If any politician does not want to fix this system, that politician needs to leave their office. 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PD 253868 22% Similar To You PD 253868's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I believe every citizen of voting age in the United States should view this film because it is very informative on the computerized voting systems across the country. After all, if our votes don't count we have no democracy. Watch this fim and tell your family, friends and co-workers to do the same! 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful xpf 1252893 12% Similar To You xpf 1252893's other reviews > 4.0 Stars The content is compelling and if even half of it is true, our democracy is very troubled. We need to demand truth and accuracy at the polls and we need to take action NOW! 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review DH 1154150 62% Similar To You DH 1154150's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Watch this movie. Tell your friends and family to watch this movie. The subjects are intelligent, articulate, and extremely courageous. This movie shows compelling evidence that makes me want to learn more about how easy it has been to alter the "results" of our government's elections, and ask what we can do to stop the fraud! 4 out of 7 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Yazheirx 57% Similar To You Yazheirx's other reviews > 2.0 Stars Like several other reviewers I wanted to like this movie but the spin and lack of solution suggestions prevented me. I agree with the need for more transparency with voting machines. I think we should have an open source voting program such that interest groups can spend their money to improve them. I still could not get past the spin. The final documentary cardinal sin for me is -

How many receipt-less voting machines are used nation-wide? Search:GEMS Diebold optical scan machines are being rigged for Bush Skull & Bones connection of Bush & Kerry: "Our Side (Race) won" Fraternity News (www.wikipedia.com_skull_and_bones) Poll Tapes thrown away - Against Federal Law (must be kept for 22 mos. by law) Hacking Democracy: Diebold (Voting Machine Software) Chairman 'promises' Vote for Ohio to G.W. Bush http://www.blackboxvoting.org/ http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/8/114.html "Why weren't voting systems being tested for Security?" - I.T.A. Independent auditors of election software. Democracy: Can we trust systems that have no accountability? * With electronic voting machines tabulating more than 80 percent of the ballots cast in America, * Seattle grandmother Bev Harris set out to determine the obvious: Do they work? * Based on the evidence presented here, the answer is "not really" * The picture that emerges as Harris unearths a treasure trove of info about mishandled votes and the inner workings of the machines is that they're not only fallible but also highly vulnerable to hacking. http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/8/114.html * This wonderful documentary proves my point that we have the best democracy that money can buy * along with our judicial system. * This film is more frightening than any horror film I've seen, because THIS IS REAL! * And this is movie biased? * Not at all. * It's an absolute eye opener that shows that your vote really doesn't count; and make sure you watch the deleted scenes(another 33 minutes of fantastic footage). Mainstream News Reports Black Box Voting » Latest News » Mainstream News Reports « Previous Next » Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post Dean Logan Says Unaffiliated WriteIns will be Checkedchristine c reid14 1 2-15-08 10:34 am New York Times re Holt BillV. Kurt Bellman26 1 2-8-08 1:57 pm AP Incorrectly calls Missouri for ClintonBill Bowen1 1 2-7-08 8:04 am San Fran CA-KSFO-AM reports Repub registration problemsNancy Tobi9 1 2-7-08 5:49 am Massachusetts results via your friends at LHSMike LaBonte10 1 2-7-08 5:24 am NJ Voting delay included Gov. CorzineMichael W Mather2 1 2-6-08 1:17 pm (CA) 2/08 - Voting machine probs delay Sacramento countPerry Duke9 1 2-5-08 6:34 pm (FL) 1/08 - More Florida voting machine problemsHal Guentert8 1 2-2-08 7:19 pm (FL) 1/08 - Final Florida results inkaren reineke11 1 2-1-08 4:25 pm (CO) 1/15 Democrats Ask Coffman to ResignFran Fleming1 1 2-1-08 9:41 am (FL) 1/08 - Problems already with voting machinesBev Harris 1 1 1-29-08 10:08 am (CO) Paper ballots win over RitterCatherine Ansbro3 1 1-29-08 2:16 am (MI) 12/07 - Proposition for new way to do primaries NEWS: Reform pres. candidate selection processCatherine Ansbro11 1 1-29-08 2:14 am Americans Abroad Can Now Vote Onlinesam lark7 1 1-26-08 3:49 pm (SC) 1/19/08 - Problems at polling locationsts taylor4 1 1-24-08 9:16 pm Feedback appreciated as this unfolds...Bruce Sims2 1 1-24-08 1:52 pm (Ohio) ACLU files suit to block paper ballots New paper ballots ca...Roger Wood20 2 1-20-08 9:43 pm REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER: Election Fraud RoundtableV. Kurt Bellman10 1 1-18-08 7:05 am (CO) Legislators lose their confidence in CoffmanCatherine Ansbro13 1 1-17-08 4:01 pm Olbermann Report !! On Voting Sue West6 1 1-17-08 3:53 pm GOP Figure Contracted to Deliver E-Voting Machines in MarylandAlex Laflamme1 1 1-17-08 9:43 am (NH) Experts skeptical of N.H. ballot-count conspiracy theoryBill Bowen60 1 1-16-08 10:37 pm Making votes countFran Fleming2 1 1-16-08 12:00 pm Ron Paul says in regard to New Hampshire voteDavid Evans1 1 1-13-08 8:32 am Diebold Changing its Buisness name Catherine Ansbro2 1 1-12-08 5:20 am (NH) 1/08 - Man plans recount of Republican vote in N.H. primary...Russell Novkov7 1 1-11-08 11:03 pm (TX) 10/07 - Another corrupt official, election tampering Refugio County - "Trust Me" failureCatherine Ansbro4 1 1-11-08 6:47 pm (FL) 9/07 - Volusia County again -- lots of defective memory cards... Volusia County - Voting system: Incident reportsWilliam Reese2 1 1-8-08 9:19 pm (FL) 10/07 - New machines, still not enough safeguards State of Florida - Voting systems: Transition to optical scan, issuesDon Powers2 1 1-8-08 12:00 am PC Magazine Article 09/12/07Don Powers2 1 1-7-08 10:45 pm (US) Can You Count On These Machines?Bev Harris 21 1 1-7-08 6:18 pm (US) Problems At Poll Permeate U.S. Political ProcessV. Kurt Bellman76 1 1-5-08 4:57 pm Legal Voters Thrown Off RollsV. Kurt Bellman7 1 1-3-08 11:15 am CNN: On the eve of Iowa caucus, some states give e-voting an 'F'...Russell Novkov2 1 1-2-08 3:42 pm (TX) 11/07 - Wharton County GOP will use paper ballots in primary... NEWS: Follow up on vote-flipping incidentLore2 1 1-1-08 3:35 pm (KY) 10/7 - Candidate for elections chief pleads guilty to forgery... Boone County - "Trust Me" FailureKathleen Wynne49 1 12-26-07 2:49 pm (US) 12/07 - FEC doors shut, 'No one left to answer phones'...Alan Brau4 1 12-25-07 8:29 pm (CO) 12/07 - Boulder: Stray marks caused decertificationBev Harris 1 1 12-23-07 9:49 pm (CO) 12/07 - Mesa: Commission defiant on vote machines NEWS: Resisting Colorado decertificationFran Fleming5 1 12-22-07 1:34 pm (AK) 12/07 - Impossible to tell whether 2004 count correct NEWS - Follow up on AZ Dem Party litigationBev Harris 1 1 12-21-07 7:05 am (CO) 12/07 - Denver: Voting gear out for count NEWS: Colo. decertification of Sequoia Julio Edwards1 1 12-18-07 6:41 am (US) 12/07 - Congressional watch tool for citizens PRESS RELEASE: New Freedom of Information toolBev Harris 1 1 12-11-07 7:20 am (PA) 11/07 - Philadelphia: Voter Fraud Allegations Again NEWS: Absentee ballot fraud allegationsV. Kurt Bellman21 1 12-7-07 2:02 pm (NJ) 12/07 - 'We are Neanderthals' - paper trail delayed again... NEWS: New Jersey paper trail statusBobby Arnold2 1 12-6-07 3:20 am (OH) 11/07 - Franklin County: Former elections official charged... NEWS: Election official corruptionBev Harris 2 1 12-2-07 7:50 am (OH) 11/07 - Township results flipped because of error (Lawrence Co... Lawrence County: Voting systems - Incident ReportBev Harris 4 1 11-23-07 2:00 pm (CT) 11/07 - Diebold/Premier machine miscount changes winner Greenwich: Voting systems - Incident reportsCatherine Ansbro4 1 11-23-07 1:47 pm (MS) 11/07 - New election ordered for Louise Linzy race Tunica County: Election incidentsBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 9:05 pm (NH) 11/07 - It's official: Jan. 8 primary date State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 8:28 pm (CA) 11/07 - Sec. State Bowen sues ES&S for $15 million State of California: Voting systems, ES&SBev Harris 3 1 11-21-07 9:09 pm (MI) 11/07 - It's back on: Mich. primary will proceed... State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of InformationBev Harris 1 1 11-21-07 10:38 am (MI) 11/07 - Michigan primary may not happen State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of Information Bev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:22 pm (NH) 11/07 - Pres primary date STILL not certain State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:06 pm (OH) 11/07 - Provisionals may alter outcome Clermont County: Provisional ballotsBev Harris 1 1 11-19-07 5:54 pm (TX) 11/07 - Alteration of live election data in Harris County... Harris County: Voting systems, "Trust Me"Russell Novkov12 1 11-15-07 9:18 pm (US) 11/07 - Sequoia voting systems under new ownership US - VendorsBev Harris 1 1 11-9-07 6:39 am (OH) 11/07 - Polls open later in ES&S location Putnam County - Voting Machines: Incident ReportsPatricia Berg1 1 11-7-07 4:34 am (FL) 10/07 - Appeals court rules The People "moot" Sarasota County - LitigationBev Harris 1 1 11-2-07 8:02 am (CT) 10/07 - Candidate's company will transport voting machines... New Britain - Chain of CustodyBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 11:22 am (IN) 10/07 - Polling locations reduced to four "vote centers"... Tippecanoe County - Access to PollsBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 8:12 am (FL) 10/07 - Wrong Ballots Sent To Miami Absentee Voters Miami-Dade County - Absentee / Mail-in Incident ReportBrant Lamb13 1 10-22-07 11:34 am (PA) 10/07 - County replacing WinVote Lackawanna County - Voting systems: Procurement Alan Brau43 1 10-18-07 7:56 pm (US) 9/07 - E-vote industry massaging itself in the media Voting systems: Security / Chain of CustodyBev Harris 52 1 10-14-07 11:07 am (OH) 10/07 - A funeral for a presidential election State of Ohio - Compliance, enforcement issuesAlan Brau3 1 10-11-07 4:32 pm (FL) 10/07 - Peculiar excuses block accountability for primary Martin County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-11-07 7:12 am (TX) 9/07 - Hilarious but improper: video of lawmakers cheat-voting... State of Texas - Noncompliance, enforcement issues with legislator voting rulesBrant Lamb11 1 10-3-07 5:06 am (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 testing continues... Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsRussell Novkov2 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (IN) 10/07 - Belly-up vendor, in come different machines Randolph County - Voting systems: ProcurementBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 report imminent Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:46 pm (US) 9/07 - If MS Excel bug = math errors, trust e-voting? US - Computer program: Incident reportBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:38 pm (NC) 9/07 - The registrar's secret lair Montgomery County - Chain of custodyBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 4:12 pm (NJ) 9/07 - Judge stalls on paper trail Mercer County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 3:46 pm (US) 9/07 - Less than 1/2 of military overseas votes counted US - Absentee / mail-in voting: Incidents, access problemsBev Harris 6 1 9-30-07 3:17 pm (GA) 9/07 - What's the punishment for throwing out 93,000 voter reg... Fulton County - Chain of custody / Privacy protection issuesBev Harris 1 1 9-28-07 9:12 am (US) 9/07 - Gird for massive new voting machine purchases: New stan... US - Voting systems: Standards, certification, procurementBrant Lamb16 1 9-27-07 5:02 am (PA) 9/07 County Commissioners' Assocation Opposes HR811 State of Pennsylvania - LegislationSamuel Scharff32 1 9-24-07 11:29 pm (CT) 9/07 - Voting rights activists express disappointment at CT s... State of Connecticut - Voting systems: Security Catherine Ansbro2 1 9-22-07 6:36 pm (NV) 9/07 - County to "prove Sequioa machines are secure"... Washoe County - Voting systems: SecurityBev Harris 1 1 9-22-07 9:43 am (IL) 9/07 - Indictment: Teamster Union vote rigging Teamster's Union [Chicago] - "Trust Me" failureBev Harris 1 1 9-8-07 4:48 pm (US) 2007 National news archive (see state foru... 130 24 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2006 National news archive (see state foru... 482 60 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2005 National news archive (see state foru... 310 152 10-11-07 12:24 pm (US) 2004 National news archive (see state forums for state news)... 77 42 10-11-07 12:24 pm Start New Thread http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/1954/1954.html Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post 2-5-08: What to watch for -- and do -- during & after Super Power T...allenfly15 1 2-12-08 12:32 am 1-29-08: Citizen's Guide to Following Vote Transport VehiclesJoel Morine31 1 2-10-08 7:18 am 1-29-08: Questions unfolding throughout New HampshireB Lindsey57 1 2-12-08 5:53 pm 1-24-08: Now posting - New Hampshire video evidenceNancy Tobi47 1 1-31-08 6:59 am 1-20-08: Holes hidden in plain sightCatherine Ansbro77 1 1-27-08 11:24 am 1-17-08: Ballot boxes found slit; NH stops putting ballots in vault; christine c reid264 1 2-13-08 8:21 pm 1-16-08: How New Hampshire is sizing upBrant Lamb172 1 2-4-08 4:39 am 1-15-08: Can recount chain of custody be rescued?Michael W Mather29 1 1-17-08 9:02 pm 1-12-08: Red Flags over New HampshireBrant Lamb153 1 1-22-08 4:41 am 1-10-08: Kucinich stepping into trap with recount?Catherine Ansbro138 1 1-15-08 12:56 pm 1-9-08: New England voting machine firm has executive criminal recordrush40 1 1-17-08 8:37 am 1-7-08: Silvestro the Cat & New Hampshire ElectionsBrett Woodward161 1 1-14-08 11:36 am 1-4-08: Eh? Iowa Republicans STILL missing 65 precincts in resultsJoel Morine41 1 1-9-08 4:04 am 1-3-08: What to do! Iowa Caucus instructions for everyoneChism Haworth26 1 1-4-08 3:09 pm 12-30-07: New problems identified with Iowa caucuses!David Luebbers48 1 1-13-08 4:16 am 12-14-07: UPDATE on Iowa Caucus ProceduresBev Harris 14 1 1-1-08 7:21 pm 11-29-07: MOONSHINE AMERICA – Collapse of the "Trust Me" modelJohn Dean15 1 1-13-08 1:06 pm 11-12-07: Unauthorized vote alterations on Texas iVotronic voting m...Bev Harris 8 1 11-16-07 4:06 pm 10-4-07: Connecticut Mayoral Scuffle Bev Harris 8 1 10-11-07 2:40 pm 9-19-07: Moonshine Elections 2 - Family Run GovermentJim March3 1 9-26-07 12:54 am 9-6-07: Moonshine Elections - The Hunt for Joe BoltonCatherine Ansbro15 1 9-14-07 9:36 pm 8-14-07: Moonshine Elections - Kentucky seriesBev Harris 4 1 9-14-07 7:38 am 8-3-07: California Decertifies, Boots InkaVote out of L.A. for goodBev Harris 15 1 8-6-07 1:31 pm 7-30-07: An Open Letter to Calif. Secretary of State BowenMark E. Smith18 1 8-7-07 9:33 am 7-17-07: HBO film on secret vote counting gets Emmy nominationRussell Novkov2 1 7-17-07 8:12 pm 7-13-07: Riverside proud to be dropped from "Top 2 Worst Places to ...Bev Harris 1 1 7-13-07 12:20 pm 7-12-07: California court may punish county for election records de...Russell Novkov2 1 7-12-07 9:04 pm 7-5-07: Debate w. a Chair #3: Will new elections "audits" help or h...Brant Lamb187 1 8-2-07 4:24 am 7-2-07: A preview on the audit debateV. Kurt Bellman62 1 7-7-07 1:39 pm 6-29-07: Debate with a Chair #2: Is no bill worse than a flawed bill?Udar Koschka35 2 7-21-07 6:04 am 6-28-07: Debate with a Chair (Part 1)Catherine Ansbro33 1 10-14-07 9:56 am 6-25-07: New Hampshire Sec. State rebukes attack on NH campaign fin...Bruce Sims12 1 6-27-07 10:39 am 6-10-07: Kucinich abandons support; for Holt Bill HR 811Catherine Ansbro13 1 6-24-07 2:30 am 5-30-07: (Calif.) The Voting Rights Obstacle Course - And the winne...Tom Courbat12 1 6-2-07 11:25 am 5-17-07: You have 2 weeks to restore your inalienable right to kic...Brant Lamb42 1 6-5-07 5:12 am 5-11-07: Uh-Oh -- HAMMERTIME! John C. Ervin12 1 6-14-07 2:54 am 5-8-07: U.S. Experiment Ready to Sail (Holt Bill out of committee)...Brant Lamb4 1 5-11-07 12:28 pm 4-9-07: Two voting products combine to steal your political privacyJohn Washburn23 1 4-26-07 2:13 pm 3-27-07 - Elections give you: The judge, the prosecutor and the she...Bev Harris 49 1 6-7-07 6:32 am 3-14-07: Riverside Rides Again ...Bev Harris 7 1 4-9-07 8:13 pm 3-9-07: The Black Box Voting Web site is changingVickie Karp16 1 3-21-07 6:03 am 2-20-07: Voting machines as a Ponzi SchemeBev Harris 77 1 3-16-07 3:48 pm 2-14-07: America's Funny Valentine - What is this romance with mach...Troy Seman2 1 2-15-07 12:14 pm 2-13-07: Agreement among groups as to Essential Revisions to HR 811Bob Roberts15 2 3-2-07 9:44 pm 2-8-07: Beware of the Bandwagon -- A concise list of problems with ...John C. Ervin12 1 2-14-07 5:48 pm 2-7-07: The Vu Memos - Cuyahoga Elections Director conversations wi...Catherine Ansbro5 1 2-8-07 2:01 pm 2-7-07: Son of Holt Bill: TechnoElection Dream Come True (But is it...Catherine Ansbro22 1 2-10-07 6:14 pm 2-6-07: New Rush Holt Bill Bev Harris4 1 2-6-07 10:42 am 2-5-07: Convicted Ohio elections workers ask for new trialKathleen Wynne6 1 2-6-07 7:38 am 2-1-07: Arizona computer logs show cheat-peeks at results, days bef...Gentry Lange4 1 3-16-07 8:43 am 1-30-07: HAVA -- The road to Boondoggle was paved with good intenti...Brant Lamb18 1 2-5-07 5:13 am 1-24-07: Two Ohio election workers found guilty; supervisors get of...Brant Lamb19 1 1-31-07 7:40 am 1-22-07: Diebold voting machines cost $2,000 more (each) in New Ham...Bev Harris4 1 1-29-07 9:09 am 1-20-07: Reports from the front lines - Kathleen Wynne video 'Best ...Kathleen Wynne7 1 1-21-07 3:39 pm 1-9-07: Vendor issues raised in Ohio, New HampshireBev Harris3 1 1-10-07 2:55 pm 12-30-06: Sign the REQUEST BY VOTERS --- Dear American Patriot, Samuel Scharff21 1 1-12-07 1:44 pm 12-22-06: Let's get down to the root of the problem: Freedom of Acc...Bev Harris1 1 12-22-06 3:23 pm 12-5-06: Government rejects NIST recommendations for paper trailCatherine Ansbro25 1 12-9-06 1:32 pm 11-22-06: ES&S serves up a Texas Turkey - Voting system stuffed wit...Greg Bodovsky15 1 12-13-06 7:43 pm 11-21-06: ES&S problem hit 34 counties in TexasBrant Lamb7 1 2-15-07 5:50 am 11-20-06: Black Box Voting receives new legal threats from ES&SJeffrey Ortiz21 1 12-13-06 7:34 pm 11-14-06: Arizona manual audit a farceDan Oetting9 1 11-18-06 2:39 pm 11-13-06: Sarasota! Florida! Never doubt that a small group of comm...Pat Vesely19 1 11-22-06 11:26 pm 11-13-06: Yes, the files on Slashdot are legit.Bev Harris23 1 11-27-06 6:48 am 11-9-06: A quick update on doingsBob Dean15 2 11-14-06 6:08 am 11-8-06: Rumsfeld replacement (Robert Gates) was director of voting...Bev Harris 93 2 1-6-08 8:49 am 11-8-06: The Sarasota Anomaly: Some say this is a smoking gun:Catherine Ansbro18 1 11-19-06 3:11 am 11-8-06: Black Box Voting to help citizens audit VIRGINIARoberta McKnight19 1 11-10-06 5:36 pm 11-7-06: What to expect -- and look for -- in the 2006 electionJanine L. Busald8 1 11-9-06 1:09 am 11-6-06: Ohio professor facing retaliatory (criminal) charges for a...Catherine Ansbro10 1 11-14-06 6:07 am 11-2-06: HBO "Hacking Democracy" to air tonight -- REVIEWSChipman Budlong71 7 11-11-06 12:23 pm 10-31-06: Reports from the front lines -- Citizens find critical se...suzanne warden15 1 11-6-06 7:10 am 10-27-06: Absentee voting is NOT advisable; Problems, things you sh...Gentry Lange17 2 3-16-07 8:54 am 10-15-06: Now we're getting somewhere -- Congressional hand counted...k.c.10 1 11-3-06 6:11 pm 10-6-06: 'The sheer number of legal/security violations is horrifyi...Jim March2 1 10-9-06 10:48 am 10-1-06: One on One with Cynthia McKinney -- Evidence, procedural p...Bev Harris7 1 10-10-06 9:56 am 9-27-06: Riverside California - One of the "Top 2" WORST PLACES TO ...Ginny Ross7 1 9-28-06 6:55 am 9-25-06: One-on-One - Allegan County Michigan citizens uncover issuesCatherine Ansbro7 1 9-27-06 2:52 pm 9-13-06: Paper Ballots Gaining Momentum - Court Decision, New Guide...John Heath5 1 10-2-06 5:55 pm 9-12-06: Election problems in the Sept. 12 primariesBev Harris1 1 9-12-06 12:12 pm 8-31-06: Stoopidest Sleepover Security Ever: Black Box Voting blows...V. Kurt Bellman19 1 9-20-06 12:00 pm 8-28-06: One-on-One -- Witness to vote-flipping: What should I do?Brian S16 2 11-7-06 4:49 pm 8-14-06: One on One Advice Comes Alive: How to stage an eventLinda Franz2 1 8-14-06 9:08 pm 8-11-06: One-on-One Advice Comes Alive Brant Lamb12 1 8-15-06 4:26 am 8-1-06: NOW IS THE TIME FOR YOUR 2 CENTS: Citizen Tool Kit to Take ...Dan Oetting73 2 8-26-06 5:42 pm 7-31-06: Georgia, Maryland Touch-screens -- New security defect evi...Jim March19 1 8-2-06 12:39 pm 7-27-06: Expensive, Insecure, Illegal, Unqualified and UnauditedRon Hammar12 2 8-26-06 4:32 pm 7-21-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Cuyahoga B.o.E. members call for Director ...John Washburn26 1 8-5-06 10:40 am 7-18-06: Georgia Election Malfunctions - Gird yourself for action, ...Brant Lamb24 1 9-5-06 4:46 am 7-17-06: The World's Quietest News Story: Kennedy Files Voting Mach...Linda Rogers4 1 7-29-06 9:07 am 7-10-06: Kentucky litigation - 'When computers fear jail, they'll b...Jenny L. Hurley6 1 7-12-06 8:37 am 07-08-06: Citizen Oversight - Pay Special Attention to Missing ItemsJody Holder19 1 7-12-06 4:20 pm 7-04-06: Black Box Voting's Declaration of IndependenceBev Harris19 1 7-15-06 1:40 pm Fourth of July Fireworks: Unredacted Hursti reports, photos releasedBrant Lamb44 1 7-12-06 5:20 am 6-27-06: Whatever happens in Utah elections - Capture on camera, audioV. Kurt Bellman11 1 6-29-06 10:44 am 6-26-06: The ultimate insult: Paper ballots entered into touch-screensTom Courbat16 1 6-28-06 1:42 pm 6-22-06: A 'Plan B' for voting machines: The National Hand Count Re...Bev Harris7 1 6-24-06 11:43 am 6-15-06: Solutions through citizen oversightBrant Lamb52 1 7-25-06 7:19 pm 6-12-06: Trouble seeks trouble - King County elections chief goes t...Tom Courbat8 1 6-21-06 6:08 pm 6-6-06: Hear the train a'comin' , Comin' round the bendBrant Lamb12 1 6-9-06 10:14 am 6-5-06: Citizens -- Here's how to watchdog electionBev Harris13 1 6-6-06 12:37 pm 5-23-06: Supplmental report adds new concerns to Hursti IIBev Harris51 1 7-1-06 10:49 am 5-19-06: Substitute 'L' for 'D' - Diebold claims Utah tests failed...Kathleen Wynne16 1 6-27-06 6:26 am 5-11-06: Three-level security flaws found in Diebold touch-screensRobert Sawdey182 1 6-7-06 11:52 am 5-10-06: Update on TSx reportCatherine Ansbro5 1 5-11-06 4:47 pm 5-10-06: As the Emery County findings evolve: Diebold's and Georgia...Joseph Hall5 1 5-11-06 2:15 pm 5-9-06: The Ohio Election BackwashAdele Eisner34 1 8-2-06 3:26 pm 5-4-06: Touch-screens fail security tests, Diebold retaliatessuhkara a yahweh`16 1 5-9-06 9:15 pm 5-4-06: Your chance to get evidence: WV, NE, KY, OR, PABev Harris1 1 5-4-06 9:13 am 5-2-06: Is the 2006 election train still on its tracks?John Washburn26 1 5-12-06 3:29 pm 4-24-06: Diebold whistleblower Stephen Heller compared to Daniel El...Russell Novkov2 1 4-24-06 3:06 pm 4-13-06: Last transcript - Calif. ITA hearings.John Washburn3 1 4-14-06 9:20 am 4-8-06: Why the Rush Holt bill (H.B. 550) is dangerousJonathan104 1 5-16-06 2:46 am 4-6-06: Utah Lt. Governor's office admits: some Diebold serial numb...ed hill32 1 4-10-06 7:24 pm 4-5-06: Transcript: Wyle Labs thinks Hursti Hack means 'the system ...John Washburn11 1 4-6-06 7:59 am 4-4-06: More Voting Machine Test Lab TranscriptsBev Harris12 1 4-6-06 11:32 pm 4-3-06: ALERT - elections officials: Diebold making 'visits' to you...Bruce Sims5 1 4-4-06 11:08 am 3-31-06: Bravissima! Calif. Senate Elections Committee grills two ...Catherine Ansbro28 1 4-12-06 1:59 pm 3-29-06: FL Attorney General Hits Voting Machine Vendors With Inves...Bev Harris4 1 3-30-06 10:39 am 3-28-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Diebold attempts to explain TSx memory def...Bev Harris34 1 4-3-06 9:17 am 03-18-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Diebold TSx touch-screen study (Part I)...Joseph Hall50 1 4-7-06 10:29 am 3-17-2006: New Black Box Voting report to be issued on Diebold TSx ...Jody Holder11 1 3-19-06 11:34 pm 3-11-06: The Stephen Heller Legal Defense FundJohn Washburn6 1 3-12-06 8:23 pm 3-8-06: Ion Sancho pits his lawyers against DieboldPat Vesely10 1 3-14-06 2:02 pm 3-3-06: While Florida vindicates Ion Sancho, Jeb Bush threatens Sa...Daniel R Spak29 1 3-19-06 5:45 pm 2-28-06: Take action NOW: Bullies pounding on whistleblowerRobert Sawdey11 1 3-9-06 5:47 pm 2-23-06: Someone accessed 40 Palm Beach County voting machines Nov ...Bev Harris110 1 3-9-06 7:30 am 2-21-06: An open letter to Bruce McPherson and the citizens of the ...Joycelynn Straight22 1 2-27-06 9:01 pm 2-17-06: BREAKING: Calif. Sec. State certifies entire Diebold produ...Bev Harris52 1 4-3-06 10:20 am 2-17-06: Election family tree: Who got us into this and how did the...Catherine Ansbro4 1 3-30-06 10:40 am 2-11-06: Voting machine examiners chickening out on Senate investig...Ron Crane24 1 2-18-06 1:27 pm 2-6-06: Landes takes e-voting to Supreme CourtV. Kurt Bellman24 1 4-19-06 10:33 am 2-6-06: Diebold agrees to waive proprietary claims to GEMS database...Marian Beddill12 1 2-11-06 1:38 pm 2-5-06: What protects your personal information once it enters e-el...Paul Lehto70 1 7-21-06 1:17 pm 2-2-06: Embezzler Jeff Dean remote accessed Calif. counties for 200...Kathleen Wynne4 1 2-2-06 8:38 am 2-1-06: Voting system examiners blocked from telling what they know?Byron Hale21 1 2-6-06 3:16 am 1-31-06: Diebold anticipates $100 to $125 million in 2006 voting sy...Bev Harris1 1 1-31-06 8:56 am 1-26-06: Elections Programmer Jeff Dean worked for same firm as for...Bev Harris25 1 1-27-06 12:45 pm 1-24-06: Public Records Get The Big Chill: Alaska's Voters vs Diebo...Jim March5 1 1-31-06 2:29 pm 1-13-06: ES&S reneges on Leon County deal 2 days before HAVA deadl...Catherine Ansbro33 1 1-17-06 1:20 am 1-9-2006: DuPage County Elections paid $30,000 to Republican politi...Bev Harris12 1 2-3-06 8:20 am 1-5-06: Wisconsin moves toward public source, then guts itJohn Washburn10 1 1-5-06 4:21 pm 1-3-2006: Hold on to your lugnuts, ES&S and Sequoia may risk Hurst...Brant Lamb33 1 1-25-06 4:56 am 12-30-05: Roll up your sleeves, we ain't done yet!BBV Admin1 1 12-30-05 4:26 pm 12-28-2005: Pennsylvania declines some Diebold but reveals an odd biasArnold Peckerman24 1 12-31-05 2:17 pm 12-23-05: ES&S under fire in CaliforniaEdward Robles5 1 12-26-05 5:36 am 12-20-05: California 'Hack' test stalled as Diebold certification d...Brant Lamb116 1 1-25-06 1:27 pm 12-13-05: Devastating hack proven - Leon County dumps DieboldSamuel Scharff97 1 5-29-06 9:25 pm 12-9-05: Diebold hack test -- Sec. State / Black Box lawyer square offJim March6 1 12-12-05 3:01 pm 12-7-05: Diebold stockholder suit - here's some ammoJim March7 1 12-8-05 9:37 am 12-4-05: 'Leave it up to us, we know best' say officialsBBV Admin27 2 12-15-05 4:17 am 11-30-05: Nope, the hack test won't be todayCatherine Ansbro25 1 1-3-06 12:51 am 11-28-05: Latest on California hack situationBruce Sims45 1 11-30-05 4:40 pm 11-24-05: Turkey Day leftovers: No thanks for stuffing elections wi...Edward Robles2 1 11-27-05 7:55 am 11-23-05: Flag on the play - Calif. Sec. State official calls foul ...Catherine Ansbro17 1 11-29-05 10:18 am 11-22-05: California invites Black Box Voting to hack Diebold votin...John Washburn31 1 12-9-05 8:23 am 11-22-2005: Updates on felons - Jeffrey Dean and John ElderBBV Admin7 1 11-22-05 9:37 am 11-21-05: Diebold violates court orderBBV Admin10 1 11-28-05 8:27 am 11-18-05: Fasten your seatbelts - It's time to bring this thing in ...Edward Robles7 1 11-27-05 9:12 am 11-15-05: FEC Investigating rapper P. Diddy (but not Blackwell or M...Edward Robles5 1 11-27-05 9:16 am 11-13-05: Detroit, Michigan elections are now a significant concernBBV Admin11 1 11-23-05 5:16 am 11-9-05: Los Angeles County has the dog & pony show downEdward Robles2 1 11-27-05 9:33 am 11-8-05: Share your observations on voting today hereKathleen Wynne10 1 11-10-05 9:15 am 11-6-05: Two state elections heads resign in FloridaBBV Admin6 1 11-6-05 5:11 am 11-4-05: Mail-in votes at higher risk with Diebold systemsBBV Admin1 1 11-4-05 8:00 am 11-3-05: The first public examination under the 15004 lawJohn Washburn5 1 11-6-05 6:41 am 10-28-05: Blackwell Blunders on Voting Machine ExaminationJohn Washburn14 1 10-31-05 11:23 am 10-26-05: The 'Perimeter Defense' - Follies and FailuresBBV Admin7 1 10-31-05 3:57 pm 10-21-05: GAO & NIST - Voting machine security finally goes mainstr...From the Mailbag10 1 10-29-05 11:39 am 10-9-05: VotoScope audit tool will catch Hart Intercivic bugBev Harris22 1 10-12-05 1:06 pm 10-8-05: Investors considering Diebold class action suitBev Harris1 1 10-8-05 3:08 pm 10-5-05: Diebold Lies Move Up the LadderBev Harris5 1 10-8-05 3:21 pm 9-19-2005: Carter-Baker Panel Report: Proposed Reforms Miss the BoatBrad Friedman52 1 10-3-05 12:02 pm 9-10-2005: Here's your chance to 'Look inside the Black Box':...alex baxter21 1 11-1-05 4:23 am 9-7-2005: Digital Image ballot scanners -- good or bad?Brant Lamb19 1 10-5-05 4:41 am 8-25-2005: Voting Rights Act expiration 2007Admin3 1 8-25-05 9:56 am 8-15-05: Election Reform -- Impending ShuffleCatherine_a107 1 8-25-05 1:51 pm 8-13-2005: If this doesn't get your blood boiling...Ubetchaiam9 1 8-15-05 11:24 am 8-10-2005: Mississippi Paper Trail ImminentCatherine Ansbro18 1 12-14-05 2:47 am 8-9-2005: Exactly what we don't want: Our election on Diebold's ser...John Howard13 1 10-5-05 8:20 pm 8-8-2005: Arcata, (CA) seeks to wrest election control from corpora...jimmarch6 1 8-12-05 12:33 am 8-5-05: 'Think Outside the Black Box' - ONLINE THINK TANK Admin5 1 8-17-05 7:46 am 8-3-05: San Diego backs down on charges against BBV director Jim MarchUbetchaiam32 1 8-22-05 12:01 pm 7-29-2005: Mississippi, listen up: California just rejected the TSxadmin17 1 8-13-05 8:15 pm 7-28-05: In his own words: Jim March on taking back his civil rightsmymarkx11 1 7-29-05 11:46 am 7-26-2005: BBV Board Member Arrested in San Diego for Viewing Vote-...cleanbean63 1 7-29-05 4:17 pm 7-25-2005: Wondering about mail-in voting? Diebold's new VoteRemote...Catherine Ansbro28 1 3-30-06 12:43 pm 7-21-2005: ES&S, Diebold lobbyists had ties to bribery investigatio...mary_ann9 1 7-31-05 12:00 am 7-20-2005: Internal documents reveal more Diebold ethics problemsadmin4 1 7-20-05 7:24 am 7-18-2005: Are The Lights Going Out In Georgia?admin5 1 7-22-05 3:14 pm 7-17-2005: Gallina (Diebold) reportedly paid Blackwell, GOP cronies...admin1 1 7-17-05 12:07 pm 7-11-2005: Case Against Diebold and Florida Division of Electionskathleen_wynne3 1 7-13-05 9:32 am 7-4-2005: The Black Box ReportJohn Dean36 1 5-8-06 6:05 pm 7-3-2005: Diebold accounting mistake -- SEC stuff may be a biggieadmin11 1 7-4-05 10:58 pm 7-1-2005: July 4 Security Alert for Diebold Optical Scanscatherine_a17 1 7-5-05 1:29 am 6-24-2005: Black Box Voting Litigation Fund LaunchedBev Harris2 1 2-3-06 8:22 am 6-17-05: Report on Calif. meeting -- Decertify Diebold?ubetchaiam11 1 7-21-05 2:37 pm 6-8-2005: Palm Beach County fails auditlinda_franz7 1 6-15-05 8:29 am 5-27-05: Optical scan system hacked (3 ways) - BBV ExclusiveBrant Lamb73 1 8-9-06 11:06 am 5-9-05: Consumer Report Series -- Following the Money Trail – Part Iadmin1 1 5-9-05 3:18 pm 5-6-04: $45m (Diebold?) contract flying under radar in Cook County ...admin2 1 5-6-05 2:53 pm 5-11-05: CANCELLED - Call to action May 19, Sacramentoadmin1 1 5-6-05 11:05 am 5-04-05 – Easier Hacking Access Sneaks in w. ADA Compliance Measuresadmin1 1 5-4-05 9:25 pm 4-24-05: LA's InkaVote system tied to Malaysian gambling outfitadmin1 1 4-24-05 12:43 pm 4-20-2005: Paper trail advocates - The devil in the detailsadmin1 1 4-20-05 11:54 am 4-18-2005: Diebold Lobbyist Documents Reveal Problemsadmin1 1 4-18-05 9:54 am 3-8-2005: Hack of Real-Life Voting System Demonstratedadmin1 1 3-9-05 12:51 pm 2-22-2005: Activating the Eagles -- Events this weekend in Californiaadmin1 1 2-22-05 5:08 pm 2-21-2005: Snohomish County (WA) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 4:51 pm 2-21-2005: Orange County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 12:57 pm 2-21-2005: Broward County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 12:14 pm 2-21-2005: Palm Beach County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 11:04 am 2-21-2005: Volusia County (FL) Updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 7:02 am 2-1-2005: Black Box Voting donates $2000 to Ohio lawyersadmin1 1 2-1-05 2:51 pm 1-28-05: Eagles rolling up sleeves in Ohio, Florida, Californiaadmin1 1 1-28-05 6:30 am 1-20-05: BULLETIN: California Panel OKs Voter Privacy Removaladmin1 1 1-20-05 6:05 pm 1-18-05: Consumer Protection lawsuit activated against Dieboldadmin1 1 1-19-05 4:43 am 1-17-05: Black Box Voting Document Archiveadmin1 1 1-17-05 1:42 pm 1-10-05: Exposing the Crypto Solutionadmin1 1 1-11-05 6:20 am 1-6-05: Constitutional Equal Protection Amendment for Voters?admin1 1 1-11-05 6:15 am 1-5-05: Election Misconduct as a Public Records Crisisadmin1 1 1-11-05 6:10 am 1-5-05: Update from Washington D.C.admin1 1 1-11-05 6:01 am 12-30-2004: Volunteer Actions -- Activating the Eaglesadmin1 1 1-11-05 5:50 am 12-29-04: Update on 'Help America Audit'admin1 1 1-11-05 5:44 am 12-28-04: Update for donors, and a look to 2005admin1 1 1-11-05 5:35 am 11-18-2004: Volunteer actions -- How to 'Be the Media'admin1 1 1-11-05 5:56 am Start New Thread Mainstream News Reports Black Box Voting » Latest News » Mainstream News Reports « Previous Next » Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post Dean Logan Says Unaffiliated WriteIns will be Checkedchristine c reid14 1 2-15-08 10:34 am New York Times re Holt BillV. Kurt Bellman26 1 2-8-08 1:57 pm AP Incorrectly calls Missouri for ClintonBill Bowen1 1 2-7-08 8:04 am San Fran CA-KSFO-AM reports Repub registration problemsNancy Tobi9 1 2-7-08 5:49 am Massachusetts results via your friends at LHSMike LaBonte10 1 2-7-08 5:24 am NJ Voting delay included Gov. CorzineMichael W Mather2 1 2-6-08 1:17 pm (CA) 2/08 - Voting machine probs delay Sacramento countPerry Duke9 1 2-5-08 6:34 pm (FL) 1/08 - More Florida voting machine problemsHal Guentert8 1 2-2-08 7:19 pm (FL) 1/08 - Final Florida results inkaren reineke11 1 2-1-08 4:25 pm (CO) 1/15 Democrats Ask Coffman to ResignFran Fleming1 1 2-1-08 9:41 am (FL) 1/08 - Problems already with voting machinesBev Harris 1 1 1-29-08 10:08 am (CO) Paper ballots win over RitterCatherine Ansbro3 1 1-29-08 2:16 am (MI) 12/07 - Proposition for new way to do primaries NEWS: Reform pres. candidate selection processCatherine Ansbro11 1 1-29-08 2:14 am Americans Abroad Can Now Vote Onlinesam lark7 1 1-26-08 3:49 pm (SC) 1/19/08 - Problems at polling locationsts taylor4 1 1-24-08 9:16 pm Feedback appreciated as this unfolds...Bruce Sims2 1 1-24-08 1:52 pm (Ohio) ACLU files suit to block paper ballots New paper ballots ca...Roger Wood20 2 1-20-08 9:43 pm REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER: Election Fraud RoundtableV. Kurt Bellman10 1 1-18-08 7:05 am (CO) Legislators lose their confidence in CoffmanCatherine Ansbro13 1 1-17-08 4:01 pm Olbermann Report !! On Voting Sue West6 1 1-17-08 3:53 pm GOP Figure Contracted to Deliver E-Voting Machines in MarylandAlex Laflamme1 1 1-17-08 9:43 am (NH) Experts skeptical of N.H. ballot-count conspiracy theoryBill Bowen60 1 1-16-08 10:37 pm Making votes countFran Fleming2 1 1-16-08 12:00 pm Ron Paul says in regard to New Hampshire voteDavid Evans1 1 1-13-08 8:32 am Diebold Changing its Buisness name Catherine Ansbro2 1 1-12-08 5:20 am (NH) 1/08 - Man plans recount of Republican vote in N.H. primary...Russell Novkov7 1 1-11-08 11:03 pm (TX) 10/07 - Another corrupt official, election tampering Refugio County - "Trust Me" failureCatherine Ansbro4 1 1-11-08 6:47 pm (FL) 9/07 - Volusia County again -- lots of defective memory cards... Volusia County - Voting system: Incident reportsWilliam Reese2 1 1-8-08 9:19 pm (FL) 10/07 - New machines, still not enough safeguards State of Florida - Voting systems: Transition to optical scan, issuesDon Powers2 1 1-8-08 12:00 am PC Magazine Article 09/12/07Don Powers2 1 1-7-08 10:45 pm (US) Can You Count On These Machines?Bev Harris 21 1 1-7-08 6:18 pm (US) Problems At Poll Permeate U.S. Political ProcessV. Kurt Bellman76 1 1-5-08 4:57 pm Legal Voters Thrown Off RollsV. Kurt Bellman7 1 1-3-08 11:15 am CNN: On the eve of Iowa caucus, some states give e-voting an 'F'...Russell Novkov2 1 1-2-08 3:42 pm (TX) 11/07 - Wharton County GOP will use paper ballots in primary... NEWS: Follow up on vote-flipping incidentLore2 1 1-1-08 3:35 pm (KY) 10/7 - Candidate for elections chief pleads guilty to forgery... Boone County - "Trust Me" FailureKathleen Wynne49 1 12-26-07 2:49 pm (US) 12/07 - FEC doors shut, 'No one left to answer phones'...Alan Brau4 1 12-25-07 8:29 pm (CO) 12/07 - Boulder: Stray marks caused decertificationBev Harris 1 1 12-23-07 9:49 pm (CO) 12/07 - Mesa: Commission defiant on vote machines NEWS: Resisting Colorado decertificationFran Fleming5 1 12-22-07 1:34 pm (AK) 12/07 - Impossible to tell whether 2004 count correct NEWS - Follow up on AZ Dem Party litigationBev Harris 1 1 12-21-07 7:05 am (CO) 12/07 - Denver: Voting gear out for count NEWS: Colo. decertification of Sequoia Julio Edwards1 1 12-18-07 6:41 am (US) 12/07 - Congressional watch tool for citizens PRESS RELEASE: New Freedom of Information toolBev Harris 1 1 12-11-07 7:20 am (PA) 11/07 - Philadelphia: Voter Fraud Allegations Again NEWS: Absentee ballot fraud allegationsV. Kurt Bellman21 1 12-7-07 2:02 pm (NJ) 12/07 - 'We are Neanderthals' - paper trail delayed again... NEWS: New Jersey paper trail statusBobby Arnold2 1 12-6-07 3:20 am (OH) 11/07 - Franklin County: Former elections official charged... NEWS: Election official corruptionBev Harris 2 1 12-2-07 7:50 am (OH) 11/07 - Township results flipped because of error (Lawrence Co... Lawrence County: Voting systems - Incident ReportBev Harris 4 1 11-23-07 2:00 pm (CT) 11/07 - Diebold/Premier machine miscount changes winner Greenwich: Voting systems - Incident reportsCatherine Ansbro4 1 11-23-07 1:47 pm (MS) 11/07 - New election ordered for Louise Linzy race Tunica County: Election incidentsBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 9:05 pm (NH) 11/07 - It's official: Jan. 8 primary date State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 8:28 pm (CA) 11/07 - Sec. State Bowen sues ES&S for $15 million State of California: Voting systems, ES&SBev Harris 3 1 11-21-07 9:09 pm (MI) 11/07 - It's back on: Mich. primary will proceed... State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of InformationBev Harris 1 1 11-21-07 10:38 am (MI) 11/07 - Michigan primary may not happen State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of Information Bev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:22 pm (NH) 11/07 - Pres primary date STILL not certain State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:06 pm (OH) 11/07 - Provisionals may alter outcome Clermont County: Provisional ballotsBev Harris 1 1 11-19-07 5:54 pm (TX) 11/07 - Alteration of live election data in Harris County... Harris County: Voting systems, "Trust Me"Russell Novkov12 1 11-15-07 9:18 pm (US) 11/07 - Sequoia voting systems under new ownership US - VendorsBev Harris 1 1 11-9-07 6:39 am (OH) 11/07 - Polls open later in ES&S location Putnam County - Voting Machines: Incident ReportsPatricia Berg1 1 11-7-07 4:34 am (FL) 10/07 - Appeals court rules The People "moot" Sarasota County - LitigationBev Harris 1 1 11-2-07 8:02 am (CT) 10/07 - Candidate's company will transport voting machines... New Britain - Chain of CustodyBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 11:22 am (IN) 10/07 - Polling locations reduced to four "vote centers"... Tippecanoe County - Access to PollsBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 8:12 am (FL) 10/07 - Wrong Ballots Sent To Miami Absentee Voters Miami-Dade County - Absentee / Mail-in Incident ReportBrant Lamb13 1 10-22-07 11:34 am (PA) 10/07 - County replacing WinVote Lackawanna County - Voting systems: Procurement Alan Brau43 1 10-18-07 7:56 pm (US) 9/07 - E-vote industry massaging itself in the media Voting systems: Security / Chain of CustodyBev Harris 52 1 10-14-07 11:07 am (OH) 10/07 - A funeral for a presidential election State of Ohio - Compliance, enforcement issuesAlan Brau3 1 10-11-07 4:32 pm (FL) 10/07 - Peculiar excuses block accountability for primary Martin County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-11-07 7:12 am (TX) 9/07 - Hilarious but improper: video of lawmakers cheat-voting... State of Texas - Noncompliance, enforcement issues with legislator voting rulesBrant Lamb11 1 10-3-07 5:06 am (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 testing continues... Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsRussell Novkov2 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (IN) 10/07 - Belly-up vendor, in come different machines Randolph County - Voting systems: ProcurementBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 report imminent Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:46 pm (US) 9/07 - If MS Excel bug = math errors, trust e-voting? US - Computer program: Incident reportBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:38 pm (NC) 9/07 - The registrar's secret lair Montgomery County - Chain of custodyBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 4:12 pm (NJ) 9/07 - Judge stalls on paper trail Mercer County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 3:46 pm (US) 9/07 - Less than 1/2 of military overseas votes counted US - Absentee / mail-in voting: Incidents, access problemsBev Harris 6 1 9-30-07 3:17 pm (GA) 9/07 - What's the punishment for throwing out 93,000 voter reg... Fulton County - Chain of custody / Privacy protection issuesBev Harris 1 1 9-28-07 9:12 am (US) 9/07 - Gird for massive new voting machine purchases: New stan... US - Voting systems: Standards, certification, procurementBrant Lamb16 1 9-27-07 5:02 am (PA) 9/07 County Commissioners' Assocation Opposes HR811 State of Pennsylvania - LegislationSamuel Scharff32 1 9-24-07 11:29 pm (CT) 9/07 - Voting rights activists express disappointment at CT s... State of Connecticut - Voting systems: Security Catherine Ansbro2 1 9-22-07 6:36 pm (NV) 9/07 - County to "prove Sequioa machines are secure"... Washoe County - Voting systems: SecurityBev Harris 1 1 9-22-07 9:43 am (IL) 9/07 - Indictment: Teamster Union vote rigging Teamster's Union [Chicago] - "Trust Me" failureBev Harris 1 1 9-8-07 4:48 pm (US) 2007 National news archive (see state foru... 130 24 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2006 National news archive (see state foru... 482 60 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2005 National news archive (see state foru... 310 152 10-11-07 12:24 pm (US) 2004 National news archive (see state forums for state news)... 77 42 10-11-07 12:24 pm Start New Thread 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review Reviews Voted Most Helpful Votes are counted and displayed within 24 hours HM 1355196 37% Similar To You HM 1355196's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is an excellent documentary that I think every American should see before they vote again. This is not a movie about Bush vs. Kerry or Republicans vs. Democrats. Its about our current voting system and exposing a multitude of problems with that system as demonstrated in the 2004 election. We are told "EVERY VOTE COUNTS" and this documentary exposes the corruption, mistruths, and shameful negligence and mishandling of these "VOTES" in a way that cannot be denied nor ignored - unless you don't watch it for yourself. 73 out of 78 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful TerBo 40% Similar To You TerBo's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is a must-see documentary, especially for those still doubtful about whether elections in this country can be tampered with. The answer is yes, yes, yes!!! Kudos to Bev Harris who has dedicated years to exposing the corruption surrounding electronic voting. Get this. After Hacking Democracy's premiere on HBO, Harris received death threats. That's how risky and powerful her work is. 67 out of 77 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Shiftdnb 47% Similar To You Shiftdnb's other reviews > 4.0 Stars This is an amazing documentary showing that there are problems with the way we vote in America. When a normal everyday citizen gets up and challenges the system, you see how the system fights back. This woman doesn't give up like most of us would and shows us and one election official in Florida that the way our voting system was run and still is, has errors. 29 out of 36 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Most Recent Reviews SG 178412 23% Similar To You SG 178412's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Anyone who cares at all about the future of democracy in America (R or D or whatever else party affiliation you choose) NEEDS to see this movie. 1 out of 1 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful grw 970297 20% Similar To You grw 970297's other reviews > 5.0 Stars If our so-called government doesn't fix the problems exposed in this excellent documentary, our democracy no longer will exist. Abolish electronic voting machines!! I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Professional Bum 63% Similar To You Professional ...'s other reviews > 5.0 Stars If you are an American & have the ability to vote, please do yourself a favor and put this in your queue immediately(especially since this is an election year). This wonderful documentary proves my point that we have the best democracy that money can buy, along with our judicial system. This film is more frightening than any horror film I've seen, because THIS IS REAL! And this is movie biased? Not at all. It's an absolute eye opener that shows that your vote really doesn't count; and make sure you watch the deleted scenes(another 33 minutes of fantastic footage). 1 out of 1 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews hawk5391 58% Similar To You hawk5391's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Even though I also watched the original slasher classic Black Christmas, this was the scariest movie I saw over the Christmas break. Although the filmmakers obviously have every reason to sensationalize potential problems with electronic voting systems ("good news is no news," right?), the implications here are frightening. Not only did Bev Harris (founder of a non-partisan watchdog group) find voting machine code unprotected on the internet, she was able to successfully hack it and prove that results could be manipulated (you can watch this being done in a matter of seconds in this film). The lack of oversight of the companies who control the majority of electronic voting is astounding, almost as bad as the sloppy manner in which our government oversees the elections themselves. 10 out of 10 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Cassun 53% Similar To You Cassun's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Probably the scariest movie I've watched in a long time. The production value isn't good, but its worth sitting through to find out just how easy it would be for just one person with an agenda to manipulate the outcome of an election. 9 out of 12 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful LR 572736 43% Similar To You LR 572736's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Politics in America is scarey enough, but when you see what is going on with our elections system, you will just go through the roof. We have hoped through the last few centuries that a government of the people, by the people and for the people would not parish from the face of the earth, and that America would be its shining example. After viewing this flick, you will realize just how tarnished our example has become. We have realized in the past decades, that money rules, and it just feels like our votes don't count, only the money that backs our politicians. Only the corporations and special interests have access to the politicians these days, not the people that vote. This picture goes a long way to explaining how that happens. After realizing the truths in this documentary, I feel even more helpless and useless to change a corrupt government by my vote. Did my vote get counted? How would I even know? The facts put forth in this program are just about incredible, but you come away realizing their powerful credibility. I wondered why their hasn't been criminal prosecution of the election fraud that is running rampant in our country today? Where are prosecuters? Why aren't elections officials who ignore our right to have our votes counted, recounter and certified being placed on trial for crimes against the electorate? You owe it to yourself and your country to see this documentary long before the next election. Don't miss this one! 8 out of 9 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful CP 1799900 36% Similar To You CP 1799900's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Wow. I just finished watching this documentary, and I can't believe what I heard and saw. This is not another Michael Moore speculative film that makes assumptions with no factual evidence. This is incredible. Everyone should see this film. It is truly an amazing look inside of our election system. 8 out of 9 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review SN 25968 62% Similar To You SN 25968's other reviews > 5.0 Stars We must all see this movie. It's not JUST about elections. It's about the undermining of our society, the breakdown. My opinion is that we should get away from secret voting and out into the public. Democracy is where WE THE PEOPLE elect our officials. You must see this to know why I write this. 4 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful JR 1824621 61% Similar To You JR 1824621's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is what makes America great: a woman, with a full life, puts it all behind her because she has come across the ultimate injustice and knows that she must right it. This is the story of the creation of the group and webpage BlackBoxVoting.com Having found the Diebold's source code, a code that not even the President of the United States can see, Bev Harris takes the code to an expert. What is revealed causes Harris to criss cross America, to prove the fact that Diebold had literally hijacked democracy. Although it's possible, it's difficult to believe that anyone can think that the 2004 Presidential Election wasn't rigged after viewing this film. A 'must see' for every American. 4 out of 4 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PW 51% Similar To You PW's other reviews > 5.0 Stars One of the scariest movies I've ever seen... because it's true. If you liked 'All the presidents men' or 'The Insider' You'll like this movie. Actually come to think of it, what this story needs is a treatment like the above mentioned movies so the message could have a broader appeal beyond this documentary. 5 out of 6 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful FV 1232392 44% Similar To You FV 1232392's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Highly recommedable as the documentary reveals what we all have been suspecting and fearing in an objective and somewhat scientific way. It is quite timely, and I think we can all relate to the topic at hand. I was touched by the reaction of some of the people in the movie when they proved how the voting system can be hacked without much effort 4 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Steve Smith 38% Similar To You Steve Smith's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Unbelievable. That's how I describe this excellent documentary. Every citizen of the USA owes it to themselves to watch this documentary. It is just shocking. It calls into question everything we know about how our votes are recorded in this country. My jaw literally dropped when I saw one part of it. I won't ruin it for those who haven't seen it. You MUST watch this! 4 out of 4 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Ben5765 35% Similar To You Ben5765's other reviews > 4.0 Stars This film is all about voting machines and how votes are tabulated. It makes mincemeat of the Diebold Corporation, manufacturer of a large percentage of the electronic voting machines used in the United States. It reveals Diebold officials making lie after lie about the security of their machines. The makers of the film meticulously document how, using Diebold's machines and data cards, someone with just a basic understanding of the technology involved (including, certainly, any Diebold employee) could rig the vote count, on one machine or on thousands of them, with absolutely no record that the rigging was ever done. The film also reveals how Diebold's chief executive officer was (and maybe still is) a large contributor to the Republican Party. He once wrote a letter stating that he would "deliver" Ohio's electoral votes in the 2004 presidential election for George W. Bush. The film later shows how his company managed to persuade Cuyahoga County, Ohio (where Cleveland is) to buy its machines. Maybe there is nothing fishy going on there, but appearances matter! Lest the film be seen as partisan, it features, among others, a Republican office-seeker from Louisiana who, after losing her race, went to view a demonstration of the machines that the voters used. As part of the demonstration she pressed the button next to her name, and the machine registered a vote for her opponent. Hmmm. She was understandably troubled. Moreover, the film points out that in many parts of the country it is in fact the local Republican Party that is wary of electronic voting machines, not the Democrats. Hacking Democracy also reveals problems with punch card voting systems--problems that dwarf the famous "hanging chad" problem of the 2000 presidential vote count in Florida. The film's message is distressing, but it is one all American citizens should hear and see. 5 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AdriH 34% Similar To You AdriH's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Yes, the documentary could use a bit of editing, but the points raised are valid enough to keep it interesting. Instead of taking a partisan view on the movie, realize how intensly frightening this movie really is. Should it be just one grandmother's job to inform us how we're being duped? No. It's our responsibility as citizens to stay informed and demand voting accuracy. 5 out of 7 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful DM 1548398 12% Similar To You DM 1548398's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Frightening and timely documentary that exposes the very painful truth about the U.S. electoral system and vote count fraud. A must see if you plan to vote ever! 5 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PM 748973 — —% Similar To You PM 748973's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This presentation should be shown to every high school junior and senior. Maybe they will be able to bring about the changes needed to restore our country to what it once was. Our democratic republic is long gone. 6 out of 6 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review Lee Anne and Tim 64% Similar To You Lee Anne and ...'s other reviews > 5.0 Stars Every voter should see this film. It leaves you with your head shaking, wondering how the history of the last 8 years might read if the vote-tampering exposed in Hacking Democracy hadnt been possible. Also a testament to how one regular person can make a difference, this documentary is very well done. Youll hate what you learn. 6 out of 10 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful yla 83539 39% Similar To You yla 83539's other reviews > 5.0 Stars SA 1674508, Yazheirx, JR 65420, RS 305556, their reviews are absolutely the threat that we all have about democracy. It is because their kind of ignorance that this movie is a 5 star and a must for every single human being to watch and learn. There is no excuse for any voting system to be too technical, too complex, too secret that we cannot prove what the votes were years from when the votes were taken. Not even 50 years, not even 100 years, not even 1000 years, not ever. For anyone to suggest that the electronic voting system is not possible to understand and to do a documentary for by a handful of heroic citizens, it is an insult to this country and democracy. Let these be the commandments of election: 1) No voting methods should be more complicated than what pen/pencil can do on a ballot. 2) Vote handling in any election process should be transparent to the public no matter when, why, how, what, who. 3) Only 100% accuracy should be accepted. Anything less then 100% should be recounted no matter how many times, how long it takes, and how much it cost to be 100% accurate. 4) Without 100% accuracy, election cannot be concluded. Another election should be conducted immediately without further delay. 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful ayi 554466 35% Similar To You ayi 554466's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Factual information clearly presented. I fear it is all too true and I fear for the next election. 5 out of 8 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AL 1659593 33% Similar To You AL 1659593's other reviews > 2.0 Stars For content, I'd give it 3 stars. It was an eye-opening look at the problems at the flaws of the "touch screen" and memory card system. What turned me off was the overboard emotions and cheesy speeches from the women of the watchdog groups. 4 out of 6 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful TD 1852913 31% Similar To You TD 1852913's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I simply cannot believe this is true. I simply cannot believe the voting process is so secretive! I am still in High School and I could probably devise a system more secure than what every American trusts to count their votes! Every American owes it to themselves to watch this incredible docudrama of corporate greed, secrecy, corruption, and lies. Every American. 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AK 817970 29% Similar To You AK 817970's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I would have to agree with everyone else in stating this a must see film for everyone. I was shocked and surprised at how poorly designed the electronic voting system is. How corrupt the political voting process is. Without this video no one would have seen the voting process. Watch this film you won't regret it. 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful jes 881880 26% Similar To You jes 881880's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Eye opening. My question is, "Why haven't criminal investigations been started?!?" I agree with the majority of the comments saying we should all see this movie; i would add it's imperative we do something with what we know after watching it. Hold our representitives accountable!!! 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful KS 608754 24% Similar To You KS 608754's other reviews > 5.0 Stars If this doesn't make people realize that we need to change how our elections are held, nothing will! Republicans and Democrats should be concerned...ALL AMERICANS should be concerned and angry. If any politician does not want to fix this system, that politician needs to leave their office. 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PD 253868 22% Similar To You PD 253868's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I believe every citizen of voting age in the United States should view this film because it is very informative on the computerized voting systems across the country. After all, if our votes don't count we have no democracy. Watch this fim and tell your family, friends and co-workers to do the same! 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful xpf 1252893 12% Similar To You xpf 1252893's other reviews > 4.0 Stars The content is compelling and if even half of it is true, our democracy is very troubled. We need to demand truth and accuracy at the polls and we need to take action NOW! 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review DH 1154150 62% Similar To You DH 1154150's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Watch this movie. Tell your friends and family to watch this movie. The subjects are intelligent, articulate, and extremely courageous. This movie shows compelling evidence that makes me want to learn more about how easy it has been to alter the "results" of our government's elections, and ask what we can do to stop the fraud! 4 out of 7 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Yazheirx 57% Similar To You Yazheirx's other reviews > 2.0 Stars Like several other reviewers I wanted to like this movie but the spin and lack of solution suggestions prevented me. I agree with the need for more transparency with voting machines. I think we should have an open source voting program such that interest groups can spend their money to improve them. I still could not get past the spin. The final documentary cardinal sin for me is -

How many receipt-less voting machines are used nation-wide? Search:GEMS Diebold optical scan machines are being rigged for Bush Skull & Bones connection of Bush & Kerry: "Our Side (Race) won" Fraternity News (www.wikipedia.com_skull_and_bones) Poll Tapes thrown away - Against Federal Law (must be kept for 22 mos. by law) Hacking Democracy: Diebold (Voting Machine Software) Chairman 'promises' Vote for Ohio to G.W. Bush http://www.blackboxvoting.org/ http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/8/114.html "Why weren't voting systems being tested for Security?" - I.T.A. Independent auditors of election software. Democracy: Can we trust systems that have no accountability? * With electronic voting machines tabulating more than 80 percent of the ballots cast in America, * Seattle grandmother Bev Harris set out to determine the obvious: Do they work? * Based on the evidence presented here, the answer is "not really" * The picture that emerges as Harris unearths a treasure trove of info about mishandled votes and the inner workings of the machines is that they're not only fallible but also highly vulnerable to hacking. http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/8/114.html * This wonderful documentary proves my point that we have the best democracy that money can buy * along with our judicial system. * This film is more frightening than any horror film I've seen, because THIS IS REAL! * And this is movie biased? * Not at all. * It's an absolute eye opener that shows that your vote really doesn't count; and make sure you watch the deleted scenes(another 33 minutes of fantastic footage). Mainstream News Reports Black Box Voting » Latest News » Mainstream News Reports « Previous Next » Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post Dean Logan Says Unaffiliated WriteIns will be Checkedchristine c reid14 1 2-15-08 10:34 am New York Times re Holt BillV. Kurt Bellman26 1 2-8-08 1:57 pm AP Incorrectly calls Missouri for ClintonBill Bowen1 1 2-7-08 8:04 am San Fran CA-KSFO-AM reports Repub registration problemsNancy Tobi9 1 2-7-08 5:49 am Massachusetts results via your friends at LHSMike LaBonte10 1 2-7-08 5:24 am NJ Voting delay included Gov. CorzineMichael W Mather2 1 2-6-08 1:17 pm (CA) 2/08 - Voting machine probs delay Sacramento countPerry Duke9 1 2-5-08 6:34 pm (FL) 1/08 - More Florida voting machine problemsHal Guentert8 1 2-2-08 7:19 pm (FL) 1/08 - Final Florida results inkaren reineke11 1 2-1-08 4:25 pm (CO) 1/15 Democrats Ask Coffman to ResignFran Fleming1 1 2-1-08 9:41 am (FL) 1/08 - Problems already with voting machinesBev Harris 1 1 1-29-08 10:08 am (CO) Paper ballots win over RitterCatherine Ansbro3 1 1-29-08 2:16 am (MI) 12/07 - Proposition for new way to do primaries NEWS: Reform pres. candidate selection processCatherine Ansbro11 1 1-29-08 2:14 am Americans Abroad Can Now Vote Onlinesam lark7 1 1-26-08 3:49 pm (SC) 1/19/08 - Problems at polling locationsts taylor4 1 1-24-08 9:16 pm Feedback appreciated as this unfolds...Bruce Sims2 1 1-24-08 1:52 pm (Ohio) ACLU files suit to block paper ballots New paper ballots ca...Roger Wood20 2 1-20-08 9:43 pm REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER: Election Fraud RoundtableV. Kurt Bellman10 1 1-18-08 7:05 am (CO) Legislators lose their confidence in CoffmanCatherine Ansbro13 1 1-17-08 4:01 pm Olbermann Report !! On Voting Sue West6 1 1-17-08 3:53 pm GOP Figure Contracted to Deliver E-Voting Machines in MarylandAlex Laflamme1 1 1-17-08 9:43 am (NH) Experts skeptical of N.H. ballot-count conspiracy theoryBill Bowen60 1 1-16-08 10:37 pm Making votes countFran Fleming2 1 1-16-08 12:00 pm Ron Paul says in regard to New Hampshire voteDavid Evans1 1 1-13-08 8:32 am Diebold Changing its Buisness name Catherine Ansbro2 1 1-12-08 5:20 am (NH) 1/08 - Man plans recount of Republican vote in N.H. primary...Russell Novkov7 1 1-11-08 11:03 pm (TX) 10/07 - Another corrupt official, election tampering Refugio County - "Trust Me" failureCatherine Ansbro4 1 1-11-08 6:47 pm (FL) 9/07 - Volusia County again -- lots of defective memory cards... Volusia County - Voting system: Incident reportsWilliam Reese2 1 1-8-08 9:19 pm (FL) 10/07 - New machines, still not enough safeguards State of Florida - Voting systems: Transition to optical scan, issuesDon Powers2 1 1-8-08 12:00 am PC Magazine Article 09/12/07Don Powers2 1 1-7-08 10:45 pm (US) Can You Count On These Machines?Bev Harris 21 1 1-7-08 6:18 pm (US) Problems At Poll Permeate U.S. Political ProcessV. Kurt Bellman76 1 1-5-08 4:57 pm Legal Voters Thrown Off RollsV. Kurt Bellman7 1 1-3-08 11:15 am CNN: On the eve of Iowa caucus, some states give e-voting an 'F'...Russell Novkov2 1 1-2-08 3:42 pm (TX) 11/07 - Wharton County GOP will use paper ballots in primary... NEWS: Follow up on vote-flipping incidentLore2 1 1-1-08 3:35 pm (KY) 10/7 - Candidate for elections chief pleads guilty to forgery... Boone County - "Trust Me" FailureKathleen Wynne49 1 12-26-07 2:49 pm (US) 12/07 - FEC doors shut, 'No one left to answer phones'...Alan Brau4 1 12-25-07 8:29 pm (CO) 12/07 - Boulder: Stray marks caused decertificationBev Harris 1 1 12-23-07 9:49 pm (CO) 12/07 - Mesa: Commission defiant on vote machines NEWS: Resisting Colorado decertificationFran Fleming5 1 12-22-07 1:34 pm (AK) 12/07 - Impossible to tell whether 2004 count correct NEWS - Follow up on AZ Dem Party litigationBev Harris 1 1 12-21-07 7:05 am (CO) 12/07 - Denver: Voting gear out for count NEWS: Colo. decertification of Sequoia Julio Edwards1 1 12-18-07 6:41 am (US) 12/07 - Congressional watch tool for citizens PRESS RELEASE: New Freedom of Information toolBev Harris 1 1 12-11-07 7:20 am (PA) 11/07 - Philadelphia: Voter Fraud Allegations Again NEWS: Absentee ballot fraud allegationsV. Kurt Bellman21 1 12-7-07 2:02 pm (NJ) 12/07 - 'We are Neanderthals' - paper trail delayed again... NEWS: New Jersey paper trail statusBobby Arnold2 1 12-6-07 3:20 am (OH) 11/07 - Franklin County: Former elections official charged... NEWS: Election official corruptionBev Harris 2 1 12-2-07 7:50 am (OH) 11/07 - Township results flipped because of error (Lawrence Co... Lawrence County: Voting systems - Incident ReportBev Harris 4 1 11-23-07 2:00 pm (CT) 11/07 - Diebold/Premier machine miscount changes winner Greenwich: Voting systems - Incident reportsCatherine Ansbro4 1 11-23-07 1:47 pm (MS) 11/07 - New election ordered for Louise Linzy race Tunica County: Election incidentsBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 9:05 pm (NH) 11/07 - It's official: Jan. 8 primary date State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 8:28 pm (CA) 11/07 - Sec. State Bowen sues ES&S for $15 million State of California: Voting systems, ES&SBev Harris 3 1 11-21-07 9:09 pm (MI) 11/07 - It's back on: Mich. primary will proceed... State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of InformationBev Harris 1 1 11-21-07 10:38 am (MI) 11/07 - Michigan primary may not happen State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of Information Bev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:22 pm (NH) 11/07 - Pres primary date STILL not certain State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:06 pm (OH) 11/07 - Provisionals may alter outcome Clermont County: Provisional ballotsBev Harris 1 1 11-19-07 5:54 pm (TX) 11/07 - Alteration of live election data in Harris County... Harris County: Voting systems, "Trust Me"Russell Novkov12 1 11-15-07 9:18 pm (US) 11/07 - Sequoia voting systems under new ownership US - VendorsBev Harris 1 1 11-9-07 6:39 am (OH) 11/07 - Polls open later in ES&S location Putnam County - Voting Machines: Incident ReportsPatricia Berg1 1 11-7-07 4:34 am (FL) 10/07 - Appeals court rules The People "moot" Sarasota County - LitigationBev Harris 1 1 11-2-07 8:02 am (CT) 10/07 - Candidate's company will transport voting machines... New Britain - Chain of CustodyBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 11:22 am (IN) 10/07 - Polling locations reduced to four "vote centers"... Tippecanoe County - Access to PollsBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 8:12 am (FL) 10/07 - Wrong Ballots Sent To Miami Absentee Voters Miami-Dade County - Absentee / Mail-in Incident ReportBrant Lamb13 1 10-22-07 11:34 am (PA) 10/07 - County replacing WinVote Lackawanna County - Voting systems: Procurement Alan Brau43 1 10-18-07 7:56 pm (US) 9/07 - E-vote industry massaging itself in the media Voting systems: Security / Chain of CustodyBev Harris 52 1 10-14-07 11:07 am (OH) 10/07 - A funeral for a presidential election State of Ohio - Compliance, enforcement issuesAlan Brau3 1 10-11-07 4:32 pm (FL) 10/07 - Peculiar excuses block accountability for primary Martin County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-11-07 7:12 am (TX) 9/07 - Hilarious but improper: video of lawmakers cheat-voting... State of Texas - Noncompliance, enforcement issues with legislator voting rulesBrant Lamb11 1 10-3-07 5:06 am (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 testing continues... Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsRussell Novkov2 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (IN) 10/07 - Belly-up vendor, in come different machines Randolph County - Voting systems: ProcurementBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 report imminent Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:46 pm (US) 9/07 - If MS Excel bug = math errors, trust e-voting? US - Computer program: Incident reportBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:38 pm (NC) 9/07 - The registrar's secret lair Montgomery County - Chain of custodyBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 4:12 pm (NJ) 9/07 - Judge stalls on paper trail Mercer County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 3:46 pm (US) 9/07 - Less than 1/2 of military overseas votes counted US - Absentee / mail-in voting: Incidents, access problemsBev Harris 6 1 9-30-07 3:17 pm (GA) 9/07 - What's the punishment for throwing out 93,000 voter reg... Fulton County - Chain of custody / Privacy protection issuesBev Harris 1 1 9-28-07 9:12 am (US) 9/07 - Gird for massive new voting machine purchases: New stan... US - Voting systems: Standards, certification, procurementBrant Lamb16 1 9-27-07 5:02 am (PA) 9/07 County Commissioners' Assocation Opposes HR811 State of Pennsylvania - LegislationSamuel Scharff32 1 9-24-07 11:29 pm (CT) 9/07 - Voting rights activists express disappointment at CT s... State of Connecticut - Voting systems: Security Catherine Ansbro2 1 9-22-07 6:36 pm (NV) 9/07 - County to "prove Sequioa machines are secure"... Washoe County - Voting systems: SecurityBev Harris 1 1 9-22-07 9:43 am (IL) 9/07 - Indictment: Teamster Union vote rigging Teamster's Union [Chicago] - "Trust Me" failureBev Harris 1 1 9-8-07 4:48 pm (US) 2007 National news archive (see state foru... 130 24 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2006 National news archive (see state foru... 482 60 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2005 National news archive (see state foru... 310 152 10-11-07 12:24 pm (US) 2004 National news archive (see state forums for state news)... 77 42 10-11-07 12:24 pm Start New Thread http://www.bbvforums.org/forums/messages/1954/1954.html Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post 2-5-08: What to watch for -- and do -- during & after Super Power T...allenfly15 1 2-12-08 12:32 am 1-29-08: Citizen's Guide to Following Vote Transport VehiclesJoel Morine31 1 2-10-08 7:18 am 1-29-08: Questions unfolding throughout New HampshireB Lindsey57 1 2-12-08 5:53 pm 1-24-08: Now posting - New Hampshire video evidenceNancy Tobi47 1 1-31-08 6:59 am 1-20-08: Holes hidden in plain sightCatherine Ansbro77 1 1-27-08 11:24 am 1-17-08: Ballot boxes found slit; NH stops putting ballots in vault; christine c reid264 1 2-13-08 8:21 pm 1-16-08: How New Hampshire is sizing upBrant Lamb172 1 2-4-08 4:39 am 1-15-08: Can recount chain of custody be rescued?Michael W Mather29 1 1-17-08 9:02 pm 1-12-08: Red Flags over New HampshireBrant Lamb153 1 1-22-08 4:41 am 1-10-08: Kucinich stepping into trap with recount?Catherine Ansbro138 1 1-15-08 12:56 pm 1-9-08: New England voting machine firm has executive criminal recordrush40 1 1-17-08 8:37 am 1-7-08: Silvestro the Cat & New Hampshire ElectionsBrett Woodward161 1 1-14-08 11:36 am 1-4-08: Eh? Iowa Republicans STILL missing 65 precincts in resultsJoel Morine41 1 1-9-08 4:04 am 1-3-08: What to do! Iowa Caucus instructions for everyoneChism Haworth26 1 1-4-08 3:09 pm 12-30-07: New problems identified with Iowa caucuses!David Luebbers48 1 1-13-08 4:16 am 12-14-07: UPDATE on Iowa Caucus ProceduresBev Harris 14 1 1-1-08 7:21 pm 11-29-07: MOONSHINE AMERICA – Collapse of the "Trust Me" modelJohn Dean15 1 1-13-08 1:06 pm 11-12-07: Unauthorized vote alterations on Texas iVotronic voting m...Bev Harris 8 1 11-16-07 4:06 pm 10-4-07: Connecticut Mayoral Scuffle Bev Harris 8 1 10-11-07 2:40 pm 9-19-07: Moonshine Elections 2 - Family Run GovermentJim March3 1 9-26-07 12:54 am 9-6-07: Moonshine Elections - The Hunt for Joe BoltonCatherine Ansbro15 1 9-14-07 9:36 pm 8-14-07: Moonshine Elections - Kentucky seriesBev Harris 4 1 9-14-07 7:38 am 8-3-07: California Decertifies, Boots InkaVote out of L.A. for goodBev Harris 15 1 8-6-07 1:31 pm 7-30-07: An Open Letter to Calif. Secretary of State BowenMark E. Smith18 1 8-7-07 9:33 am 7-17-07: HBO film on secret vote counting gets Emmy nominationRussell Novkov2 1 7-17-07 8:12 pm 7-13-07: Riverside proud to be dropped from "Top 2 Worst Places to ...Bev Harris 1 1 7-13-07 12:20 pm 7-12-07: California court may punish county for election records de...Russell Novkov2 1 7-12-07 9:04 pm 7-5-07: Debate w. a Chair #3: Will new elections "audits" help or h...Brant Lamb187 1 8-2-07 4:24 am 7-2-07: A preview on the audit debateV. Kurt Bellman62 1 7-7-07 1:39 pm 6-29-07: Debate with a Chair #2: Is no bill worse than a flawed bill?Udar Koschka35 2 7-21-07 6:04 am 6-28-07: Debate with a Chair (Part 1)Catherine Ansbro33 1 10-14-07 9:56 am 6-25-07: New Hampshire Sec. State rebukes attack on NH campaign fin...Bruce Sims12 1 6-27-07 10:39 am 6-10-07: Kucinich abandons support; for Holt Bill HR 811Catherine Ansbro13 1 6-24-07 2:30 am 5-30-07: (Calif.) The Voting Rights Obstacle Course - And the winne...Tom Courbat12 1 6-2-07 11:25 am 5-17-07: You have 2 weeks to restore your inalienable right to kic...Brant Lamb42 1 6-5-07 5:12 am 5-11-07: Uh-Oh -- HAMMERTIME! John C. Ervin12 1 6-14-07 2:54 am 5-8-07: U.S. Experiment Ready to Sail (Holt Bill out of committee)...Brant Lamb4 1 5-11-07 12:28 pm 4-9-07: Two voting products combine to steal your political privacyJohn Washburn23 1 4-26-07 2:13 pm 3-27-07 - Elections give you: The judge, the prosecutor and the she...Bev Harris 49 1 6-7-07 6:32 am 3-14-07: Riverside Rides Again ...Bev Harris 7 1 4-9-07 8:13 pm 3-9-07: The Black Box Voting Web site is changingVickie Karp16 1 3-21-07 6:03 am 2-20-07: Voting machines as a Ponzi SchemeBev Harris 77 1 3-16-07 3:48 pm 2-14-07: America's Funny Valentine - What is this romance with mach...Troy Seman2 1 2-15-07 12:14 pm 2-13-07: Agreement among groups as to Essential Revisions to HR 811Bob Roberts15 2 3-2-07 9:44 pm 2-8-07: Beware of the Bandwagon -- A concise list of problems with ...John C. Ervin12 1 2-14-07 5:48 pm 2-7-07: The Vu Memos - Cuyahoga Elections Director conversations wi...Catherine Ansbro5 1 2-8-07 2:01 pm 2-7-07: Son of Holt Bill: TechnoElection Dream Come True (But is it...Catherine Ansbro22 1 2-10-07 6:14 pm 2-6-07: New Rush Holt Bill Bev Harris4 1 2-6-07 10:42 am 2-5-07: Convicted Ohio elections workers ask for new trialKathleen Wynne6 1 2-6-07 7:38 am 2-1-07: Arizona computer logs show cheat-peeks at results, days bef...Gentry Lange4 1 3-16-07 8:43 am 1-30-07: HAVA -- The road to Boondoggle was paved with good intenti...Brant Lamb18 1 2-5-07 5:13 am 1-24-07: Two Ohio election workers found guilty; supervisors get of...Brant Lamb19 1 1-31-07 7:40 am 1-22-07: Diebold voting machines cost $2,000 more (each) in New Ham...Bev Harris4 1 1-29-07 9:09 am 1-20-07: Reports from the front lines - Kathleen Wynne video 'Best ...Kathleen Wynne7 1 1-21-07 3:39 pm 1-9-07: Vendor issues raised in Ohio, New HampshireBev Harris3 1 1-10-07 2:55 pm 12-30-06: Sign the REQUEST BY VOTERS --- Dear American Patriot, Samuel Scharff21 1 1-12-07 1:44 pm 12-22-06: Let's get down to the root of the problem: Freedom of Acc...Bev Harris1 1 12-22-06 3:23 pm 12-5-06: Government rejects NIST recommendations for paper trailCatherine Ansbro25 1 12-9-06 1:32 pm 11-22-06: ES&S serves up a Texas Turkey - Voting system stuffed wit...Greg Bodovsky15 1 12-13-06 7:43 pm 11-21-06: ES&S problem hit 34 counties in TexasBrant Lamb7 1 2-15-07 5:50 am 11-20-06: Black Box Voting receives new legal threats from ES&SJeffrey Ortiz21 1 12-13-06 7:34 pm 11-14-06: Arizona manual audit a farceDan Oetting9 1 11-18-06 2:39 pm 11-13-06: Sarasota! Florida! Never doubt that a small group of comm...Pat Vesely19 1 11-22-06 11:26 pm 11-13-06: Yes, the files on Slashdot are legit.Bev Harris23 1 11-27-06 6:48 am 11-9-06: A quick update on doingsBob Dean15 2 11-14-06 6:08 am 11-8-06: Rumsfeld replacement (Robert Gates) was director of voting...Bev Harris 93 2 1-6-08 8:49 am 11-8-06: The Sarasota Anomaly: Some say this is a smoking gun:Catherine Ansbro18 1 11-19-06 3:11 am 11-8-06: Black Box Voting to help citizens audit VIRGINIARoberta McKnight19 1 11-10-06 5:36 pm 11-7-06: What to expect -- and look for -- in the 2006 electionJanine L. Busald8 1 11-9-06 1:09 am 11-6-06: Ohio professor facing retaliatory (criminal) charges for a...Catherine Ansbro10 1 11-14-06 6:07 am 11-2-06: HBO "Hacking Democracy" to air tonight -- REVIEWSChipman Budlong71 7 11-11-06 12:23 pm 10-31-06: Reports from the front lines -- Citizens find critical se...suzanne warden15 1 11-6-06 7:10 am 10-27-06: Absentee voting is NOT advisable; Problems, things you sh...Gentry Lange17 2 3-16-07 8:54 am 10-15-06: Now we're getting somewhere -- Congressional hand counted...k.c.10 1 11-3-06 6:11 pm 10-6-06: 'The sheer number of legal/security violations is horrifyi...Jim March2 1 10-9-06 10:48 am 10-1-06: One on One with Cynthia McKinney -- Evidence, procedural p...Bev Harris7 1 10-10-06 9:56 am 9-27-06: Riverside California - One of the "Top 2" WORST PLACES TO ...Ginny Ross7 1 9-28-06 6:55 am 9-25-06: One-on-One - Allegan County Michigan citizens uncover issuesCatherine Ansbro7 1 9-27-06 2:52 pm 9-13-06: Paper Ballots Gaining Momentum - Court Decision, New Guide...John Heath5 1 10-2-06 5:55 pm 9-12-06: Election problems in the Sept. 12 primariesBev Harris1 1 9-12-06 12:12 pm 8-31-06: Stoopidest Sleepover Security Ever: Black Box Voting blows...V. Kurt Bellman19 1 9-20-06 12:00 pm 8-28-06: One-on-One -- Witness to vote-flipping: What should I do?Brian S16 2 11-7-06 4:49 pm 8-14-06: One on One Advice Comes Alive: How to stage an eventLinda Franz2 1 8-14-06 9:08 pm 8-11-06: One-on-One Advice Comes Alive Brant Lamb12 1 8-15-06 4:26 am 8-1-06: NOW IS THE TIME FOR YOUR 2 CENTS: Citizen Tool Kit to Take ...Dan Oetting73 2 8-26-06 5:42 pm 7-31-06: Georgia, Maryland Touch-screens -- New security defect evi...Jim March19 1 8-2-06 12:39 pm 7-27-06: Expensive, Insecure, Illegal, Unqualified and UnauditedRon Hammar12 2 8-26-06 4:32 pm 7-21-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Cuyahoga B.o.E. members call for Director ...John Washburn26 1 8-5-06 10:40 am 7-18-06: Georgia Election Malfunctions - Gird yourself for action, ...Brant Lamb24 1 9-5-06 4:46 am 7-17-06: The World's Quietest News Story: Kennedy Files Voting Mach...Linda Rogers4 1 7-29-06 9:07 am 7-10-06: Kentucky litigation - 'When computers fear jail, they'll b...Jenny L. Hurley6 1 7-12-06 8:37 am 07-08-06: Citizen Oversight - Pay Special Attention to Missing ItemsJody Holder19 1 7-12-06 4:20 pm 7-04-06: Black Box Voting's Declaration of IndependenceBev Harris19 1 7-15-06 1:40 pm Fourth of July Fireworks: Unredacted Hursti reports, photos releasedBrant Lamb44 1 7-12-06 5:20 am 6-27-06: Whatever happens in Utah elections - Capture on camera, audioV. Kurt Bellman11 1 6-29-06 10:44 am 6-26-06: The ultimate insult: Paper ballots entered into touch-screensTom Courbat16 1 6-28-06 1:42 pm 6-22-06: A 'Plan B' for voting machines: The National Hand Count Re...Bev Harris7 1 6-24-06 11:43 am 6-15-06: Solutions through citizen oversightBrant Lamb52 1 7-25-06 7:19 pm 6-12-06: Trouble seeks trouble - King County elections chief goes t...Tom Courbat8 1 6-21-06 6:08 pm 6-6-06: Hear the train a'comin' , Comin' round the bendBrant Lamb12 1 6-9-06 10:14 am 6-5-06: Citizens -- Here's how to watchdog electionBev Harris13 1 6-6-06 12:37 pm 5-23-06: Supplmental report adds new concerns to Hursti IIBev Harris51 1 7-1-06 10:49 am 5-19-06: Substitute 'L' for 'D' - Diebold claims Utah tests failed...Kathleen Wynne16 1 6-27-06 6:26 am 5-11-06: Three-level security flaws found in Diebold touch-screensRobert Sawdey182 1 6-7-06 11:52 am 5-10-06: Update on TSx reportCatherine Ansbro5 1 5-11-06 4:47 pm 5-10-06: As the Emery County findings evolve: Diebold's and Georgia...Joseph Hall5 1 5-11-06 2:15 pm 5-9-06: The Ohio Election BackwashAdele Eisner34 1 8-2-06 3:26 pm 5-4-06: Touch-screens fail security tests, Diebold retaliatessuhkara a yahweh`16 1 5-9-06 9:15 pm 5-4-06: Your chance to get evidence: WV, NE, KY, OR, PABev Harris1 1 5-4-06 9:13 am 5-2-06: Is the 2006 election train still on its tracks?John Washburn26 1 5-12-06 3:29 pm 4-24-06: Diebold whistleblower Stephen Heller compared to Daniel El...Russell Novkov2 1 4-24-06 3:06 pm 4-13-06: Last transcript - Calif. ITA hearings.John Washburn3 1 4-14-06 9:20 am 4-8-06: Why the Rush Holt bill (H.B. 550) is dangerousJonathan104 1 5-16-06 2:46 am 4-6-06: Utah Lt. Governor's office admits: some Diebold serial numb...ed hill32 1 4-10-06 7:24 pm 4-5-06: Transcript: Wyle Labs thinks Hursti Hack means 'the system ...John Washburn11 1 4-6-06 7:59 am 4-4-06: More Voting Machine Test Lab TranscriptsBev Harris12 1 4-6-06 11:32 pm 4-3-06: ALERT - elections officials: Diebold making 'visits' to you...Bruce Sims5 1 4-4-06 11:08 am 3-31-06: Bravissima! Calif. Senate Elections Committee grills two ...Catherine Ansbro28 1 4-12-06 1:59 pm 3-29-06: FL Attorney General Hits Voting Machine Vendors With Inves...Bev Harris4 1 3-30-06 10:39 am 3-28-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Diebold attempts to explain TSx memory def...Bev Harris34 1 4-3-06 9:17 am 03-18-06: BBV EXCLUSIVE - Diebold TSx touch-screen study (Part I)...Joseph Hall50 1 4-7-06 10:29 am 3-17-2006: New Black Box Voting report to be issued on Diebold TSx ...Jody Holder11 1 3-19-06 11:34 pm 3-11-06: The Stephen Heller Legal Defense FundJohn Washburn6 1 3-12-06 8:23 pm 3-8-06: Ion Sancho pits his lawyers against DieboldPat Vesely10 1 3-14-06 2:02 pm 3-3-06: While Florida vindicates Ion Sancho, Jeb Bush threatens Sa...Daniel R Spak29 1 3-19-06 5:45 pm 2-28-06: Take action NOW: Bullies pounding on whistleblowerRobert Sawdey11 1 3-9-06 5:47 pm 2-23-06: Someone accessed 40 Palm Beach County voting machines Nov ...Bev Harris110 1 3-9-06 7:30 am 2-21-06: An open letter to Bruce McPherson and the citizens of the ...Joycelynn Straight22 1 2-27-06 9:01 pm 2-17-06: BREAKING: Calif. Sec. State certifies entire Diebold produ...Bev Harris52 1 4-3-06 10:20 am 2-17-06: Election family tree: Who got us into this and how did the...Catherine Ansbro4 1 3-30-06 10:40 am 2-11-06: Voting machine examiners chickening out on Senate investig...Ron Crane24 1 2-18-06 1:27 pm 2-6-06: Landes takes e-voting to Supreme CourtV. Kurt Bellman24 1 4-19-06 10:33 am 2-6-06: Diebold agrees to waive proprietary claims to GEMS database...Marian Beddill12 1 2-11-06 1:38 pm 2-5-06: What protects your personal information once it enters e-el...Paul Lehto70 1 7-21-06 1:17 pm 2-2-06: Embezzler Jeff Dean remote accessed Calif. counties for 200...Kathleen Wynne4 1 2-2-06 8:38 am 2-1-06: Voting system examiners blocked from telling what they know?Byron Hale21 1 2-6-06 3:16 am 1-31-06: Diebold anticipates $100 to $125 million in 2006 voting sy...Bev Harris1 1 1-31-06 8:56 am 1-26-06: Elections Programmer Jeff Dean worked for same firm as for...Bev Harris25 1 1-27-06 12:45 pm 1-24-06: Public Records Get The Big Chill: Alaska's Voters vs Diebo...Jim March5 1 1-31-06 2:29 pm 1-13-06: ES&S reneges on Leon County deal 2 days before HAVA deadl...Catherine Ansbro33 1 1-17-06 1:20 am 1-9-2006: DuPage County Elections paid $30,000 to Republican politi...Bev Harris12 1 2-3-06 8:20 am 1-5-06: Wisconsin moves toward public source, then guts itJohn Washburn10 1 1-5-06 4:21 pm 1-3-2006: Hold on to your lugnuts, ES&S and Sequoia may risk Hurst...Brant Lamb33 1 1-25-06 4:56 am 12-30-05: Roll up your sleeves, we ain't done yet!BBV Admin1 1 12-30-05 4:26 pm 12-28-2005: Pennsylvania declines some Diebold but reveals an odd biasArnold Peckerman24 1 12-31-05 2:17 pm 12-23-05: ES&S under fire in CaliforniaEdward Robles5 1 12-26-05 5:36 am 12-20-05: California 'Hack' test stalled as Diebold certification d...Brant Lamb116 1 1-25-06 1:27 pm 12-13-05: Devastating hack proven - Leon County dumps DieboldSamuel Scharff97 1 5-29-06 9:25 pm 12-9-05: Diebold hack test -- Sec. State / Black Box lawyer square offJim March6 1 12-12-05 3:01 pm 12-7-05: Diebold stockholder suit - here's some ammoJim March7 1 12-8-05 9:37 am 12-4-05: 'Leave it up to us, we know best' say officialsBBV Admin27 2 12-15-05 4:17 am 11-30-05: Nope, the hack test won't be todayCatherine Ansbro25 1 1-3-06 12:51 am 11-28-05: Latest on California hack situationBruce Sims45 1 11-30-05 4:40 pm 11-24-05: Turkey Day leftovers: No thanks for stuffing elections wi...Edward Robles2 1 11-27-05 7:55 am 11-23-05: Flag on the play - Calif. Sec. State official calls foul ...Catherine Ansbro17 1 11-29-05 10:18 am 11-22-05: California invites Black Box Voting to hack Diebold votin...John Washburn31 1 12-9-05 8:23 am 11-22-2005: Updates on felons - Jeffrey Dean and John ElderBBV Admin7 1 11-22-05 9:37 am 11-21-05: Diebold violates court orderBBV Admin10 1 11-28-05 8:27 am 11-18-05: Fasten your seatbelts - It's time to bring this thing in ...Edward Robles7 1 11-27-05 9:12 am 11-15-05: FEC Investigating rapper P. Diddy (but not Blackwell or M...Edward Robles5 1 11-27-05 9:16 am 11-13-05: Detroit, Michigan elections are now a significant concernBBV Admin11 1 11-23-05 5:16 am 11-9-05: Los Angeles County has the dog & pony show downEdward Robles2 1 11-27-05 9:33 am 11-8-05: Share your observations on voting today hereKathleen Wynne10 1 11-10-05 9:15 am 11-6-05: Two state elections heads resign in FloridaBBV Admin6 1 11-6-05 5:11 am 11-4-05: Mail-in votes at higher risk with Diebold systemsBBV Admin1 1 11-4-05 8:00 am 11-3-05: The first public examination under the 15004 lawJohn Washburn5 1 11-6-05 6:41 am 10-28-05: Blackwell Blunders on Voting Machine ExaminationJohn Washburn14 1 10-31-05 11:23 am 10-26-05: The 'Perimeter Defense' - Follies and FailuresBBV Admin7 1 10-31-05 3:57 pm 10-21-05: GAO & NIST - Voting machine security finally goes mainstr...From the Mailbag10 1 10-29-05 11:39 am 10-9-05: VotoScope audit tool will catch Hart Intercivic bugBev Harris22 1 10-12-05 1:06 pm 10-8-05: Investors considering Diebold class action suitBev Harris1 1 10-8-05 3:08 pm 10-5-05: Diebold Lies Move Up the LadderBev Harris5 1 10-8-05 3:21 pm 9-19-2005: Carter-Baker Panel Report: Proposed Reforms Miss the BoatBrad Friedman52 1 10-3-05 12:02 pm 9-10-2005: Here's your chance to 'Look inside the Black Box':...alex baxter21 1 11-1-05 4:23 am 9-7-2005: Digital Image ballot scanners -- good or bad?Brant Lamb19 1 10-5-05 4:41 am 8-25-2005: Voting Rights Act expiration 2007Admin3 1 8-25-05 9:56 am 8-15-05: Election Reform -- Impending ShuffleCatherine_a107 1 8-25-05 1:51 pm 8-13-2005: If this doesn't get your blood boiling...Ubetchaiam9 1 8-15-05 11:24 am 8-10-2005: Mississippi Paper Trail ImminentCatherine Ansbro18 1 12-14-05 2:47 am 8-9-2005: Exactly what we don't want: Our election on Diebold's ser...John Howard13 1 10-5-05 8:20 pm 8-8-2005: Arcata, (CA) seeks to wrest election control from corpora...jimmarch6 1 8-12-05 12:33 am 8-5-05: 'Think Outside the Black Box' - ONLINE THINK TANK Admin5 1 8-17-05 7:46 am 8-3-05: San Diego backs down on charges against BBV director Jim MarchUbetchaiam32 1 8-22-05 12:01 pm 7-29-2005: Mississippi, listen up: California just rejected the TSxadmin17 1 8-13-05 8:15 pm 7-28-05: In his own words: Jim March on taking back his civil rightsmymarkx11 1 7-29-05 11:46 am 7-26-2005: BBV Board Member Arrested in San Diego for Viewing Vote-...cleanbean63 1 7-29-05 4:17 pm 7-25-2005: Wondering about mail-in voting? Diebold's new VoteRemote...Catherine Ansbro28 1 3-30-06 12:43 pm 7-21-2005: ES&S, Diebold lobbyists had ties to bribery investigatio...mary_ann9 1 7-31-05 12:00 am 7-20-2005: Internal documents reveal more Diebold ethics problemsadmin4 1 7-20-05 7:24 am 7-18-2005: Are The Lights Going Out In Georgia?admin5 1 7-22-05 3:14 pm 7-17-2005: Gallina (Diebold) reportedly paid Blackwell, GOP cronies...admin1 1 7-17-05 12:07 pm 7-11-2005: Case Against Diebold and Florida Division of Electionskathleen_wynne3 1 7-13-05 9:32 am 7-4-2005: The Black Box ReportJohn Dean36 1 5-8-06 6:05 pm 7-3-2005: Diebold accounting mistake -- SEC stuff may be a biggieadmin11 1 7-4-05 10:58 pm 7-1-2005: July 4 Security Alert for Diebold Optical Scanscatherine_a17 1 7-5-05 1:29 am 6-24-2005: Black Box Voting Litigation Fund LaunchedBev Harris2 1 2-3-06 8:22 am 6-17-05: Report on Calif. meeting -- Decertify Diebold?ubetchaiam11 1 7-21-05 2:37 pm 6-8-2005: Palm Beach County fails auditlinda_franz7 1 6-15-05 8:29 am 5-27-05: Optical scan system hacked (3 ways) - BBV ExclusiveBrant Lamb73 1 8-9-06 11:06 am 5-9-05: Consumer Report Series -- Following the Money Trail – Part Iadmin1 1 5-9-05 3:18 pm 5-6-04: $45m (Diebold?) contract flying under radar in Cook County ...admin2 1 5-6-05 2:53 pm 5-11-05: CANCELLED - Call to action May 19, Sacramentoadmin1 1 5-6-05 11:05 am 5-04-05 – Easier Hacking Access Sneaks in w. ADA Compliance Measuresadmin1 1 5-4-05 9:25 pm 4-24-05: LA's InkaVote system tied to Malaysian gambling outfitadmin1 1 4-24-05 12:43 pm 4-20-2005: Paper trail advocates - The devil in the detailsadmin1 1 4-20-05 11:54 am 4-18-2005: Diebold Lobbyist Documents Reveal Problemsadmin1 1 4-18-05 9:54 am 3-8-2005: Hack of Real-Life Voting System Demonstratedadmin1 1 3-9-05 12:51 pm 2-22-2005: Activating the Eagles -- Events this weekend in Californiaadmin1 1 2-22-05 5:08 pm 2-21-2005: Snohomish County (WA) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 4:51 pm 2-21-2005: Orange County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 12:57 pm 2-21-2005: Broward County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 12:14 pm 2-21-2005: Palm Beach County (FL) updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 11:04 am 2-21-2005: Volusia County (FL) Updateadmin1 1 2-21-05 7:02 am 2-1-2005: Black Box Voting donates $2000 to Ohio lawyersadmin1 1 2-1-05 2:51 pm 1-28-05: Eagles rolling up sleeves in Ohio, Florida, Californiaadmin1 1 1-28-05 6:30 am 1-20-05: BULLETIN: California Panel OKs Voter Privacy Removaladmin1 1 1-20-05 6:05 pm 1-18-05: Consumer Protection lawsuit activated against Dieboldadmin1 1 1-19-05 4:43 am 1-17-05: Black Box Voting Document Archiveadmin1 1 1-17-05 1:42 pm 1-10-05: Exposing the Crypto Solutionadmin1 1 1-11-05 6:20 am 1-6-05: Constitutional Equal Protection Amendment for Voters?admin1 1 1-11-05 6:15 am 1-5-05: Election Misconduct as a Public Records Crisisadmin1 1 1-11-05 6:10 am 1-5-05: Update from Washington D.C.admin1 1 1-11-05 6:01 am 12-30-2004: Volunteer Actions -- Activating the Eaglesadmin1 1 1-11-05 5:50 am 12-29-04: Update on 'Help America Audit'admin1 1 1-11-05 5:44 am 12-28-04: Update for donors, and a look to 2005admin1 1 1-11-05 5:35 am 11-18-2004: Volunteer actions -- How to 'Be the Media'admin1 1 1-11-05 5:56 am Start New Thread Mainstream News Reports Black Box Voting » Latest News » Mainstream News Reports « Previous Next » Thread Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post Dean Logan Says Unaffiliated WriteIns will be Checkedchristine c reid14 1 2-15-08 10:34 am New York Times re Holt BillV. Kurt Bellman26 1 2-8-08 1:57 pm AP Incorrectly calls Missouri for ClintonBill Bowen1 1 2-7-08 8:04 am San Fran CA-KSFO-AM reports Repub registration problemsNancy Tobi9 1 2-7-08 5:49 am Massachusetts results via your friends at LHSMike LaBonte10 1 2-7-08 5:24 am NJ Voting delay included Gov. CorzineMichael W Mather2 1 2-6-08 1:17 pm (CA) 2/08 - Voting machine probs delay Sacramento countPerry Duke9 1 2-5-08 6:34 pm (FL) 1/08 - More Florida voting machine problemsHal Guentert8 1 2-2-08 7:19 pm (FL) 1/08 - Final Florida results inkaren reineke11 1 2-1-08 4:25 pm (CO) 1/15 Democrats Ask Coffman to ResignFran Fleming1 1 2-1-08 9:41 am (FL) 1/08 - Problems already with voting machinesBev Harris 1 1 1-29-08 10:08 am (CO) Paper ballots win over RitterCatherine Ansbro3 1 1-29-08 2:16 am (MI) 12/07 - Proposition for new way to do primaries NEWS: Reform pres. candidate selection processCatherine Ansbro11 1 1-29-08 2:14 am Americans Abroad Can Now Vote Onlinesam lark7 1 1-26-08 3:49 pm (SC) 1/19/08 - Problems at polling locationsts taylor4 1 1-24-08 9:16 pm Feedback appreciated as this unfolds...Bruce Sims2 1 1-24-08 1:52 pm (Ohio) ACLU files suit to block paper ballots New paper ballots ca...Roger Wood20 2 1-20-08 9:43 pm REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER: Election Fraud RoundtableV. Kurt Bellman10 1 1-18-08 7:05 am (CO) Legislators lose their confidence in CoffmanCatherine Ansbro13 1 1-17-08 4:01 pm Olbermann Report !! On Voting Sue West6 1 1-17-08 3:53 pm GOP Figure Contracted to Deliver E-Voting Machines in MarylandAlex Laflamme1 1 1-17-08 9:43 am (NH) Experts skeptical of N.H. ballot-count conspiracy theoryBill Bowen60 1 1-16-08 10:37 pm Making votes countFran Fleming2 1 1-16-08 12:00 pm Ron Paul says in regard to New Hampshire voteDavid Evans1 1 1-13-08 8:32 am Diebold Changing its Buisness name Catherine Ansbro2 1 1-12-08 5:20 am (NH) 1/08 - Man plans recount of Republican vote in N.H. primary...Russell Novkov7 1 1-11-08 11:03 pm (TX) 10/07 - Another corrupt official, election tampering Refugio County - "Trust Me" failureCatherine Ansbro4 1 1-11-08 6:47 pm (FL) 9/07 - Volusia County again -- lots of defective memory cards... Volusia County - Voting system: Incident reportsWilliam Reese2 1 1-8-08 9:19 pm (FL) 10/07 - New machines, still not enough safeguards State of Florida - Voting systems: Transition to optical scan, issuesDon Powers2 1 1-8-08 12:00 am PC Magazine Article 09/12/07Don Powers2 1 1-7-08 10:45 pm (US) Can You Count On These Machines?Bev Harris 21 1 1-7-08 6:18 pm (US) Problems At Poll Permeate U.S. Political ProcessV. Kurt Bellman76 1 1-5-08 4:57 pm Legal Voters Thrown Off RollsV. Kurt Bellman7 1 1-3-08 11:15 am CNN: On the eve of Iowa caucus, some states give e-voting an 'F'...Russell Novkov2 1 1-2-08 3:42 pm (TX) 11/07 - Wharton County GOP will use paper ballots in primary... NEWS: Follow up on vote-flipping incidentLore2 1 1-1-08 3:35 pm (KY) 10/7 - Candidate for elections chief pleads guilty to forgery... Boone County - "Trust Me" FailureKathleen Wynne49 1 12-26-07 2:49 pm (US) 12/07 - FEC doors shut, 'No one left to answer phones'...Alan Brau4 1 12-25-07 8:29 pm (CO) 12/07 - Boulder: Stray marks caused decertificationBev Harris 1 1 12-23-07 9:49 pm (CO) 12/07 - Mesa: Commission defiant on vote machines NEWS: Resisting Colorado decertificationFran Fleming5 1 12-22-07 1:34 pm (AK) 12/07 - Impossible to tell whether 2004 count correct NEWS - Follow up on AZ Dem Party litigationBev Harris 1 1 12-21-07 7:05 am (CO) 12/07 - Denver: Voting gear out for count NEWS: Colo. decertification of Sequoia Julio Edwards1 1 12-18-07 6:41 am (US) 12/07 - Congressional watch tool for citizens PRESS RELEASE: New Freedom of Information toolBev Harris 1 1 12-11-07 7:20 am (PA) 11/07 - Philadelphia: Voter Fraud Allegations Again NEWS: Absentee ballot fraud allegationsV. Kurt Bellman21 1 12-7-07 2:02 pm (NJ) 12/07 - 'We are Neanderthals' - paper trail delayed again... NEWS: New Jersey paper trail statusBobby Arnold2 1 12-6-07 3:20 am (OH) 11/07 - Franklin County: Former elections official charged... NEWS: Election official corruptionBev Harris 2 1 12-2-07 7:50 am (OH) 11/07 - Township results flipped because of error (Lawrence Co... Lawrence County: Voting systems - Incident ReportBev Harris 4 1 11-23-07 2:00 pm (CT) 11/07 - Diebold/Premier machine miscount changes winner Greenwich: Voting systems - Incident reportsCatherine Ansbro4 1 11-23-07 1:47 pm (MS) 11/07 - New election ordered for Louise Linzy race Tunica County: Election incidentsBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 9:05 pm (NH) 11/07 - It's official: Jan. 8 primary date State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-22-07 8:28 pm (CA) 11/07 - Sec. State Bowen sues ES&S for $15 million State of California: Voting systems, ES&SBev Harris 3 1 11-21-07 9:09 pm (MI) 11/07 - It's back on: Mich. primary will proceed... State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of InformationBev Harris 1 1 11-21-07 10:38 am (MI) 11/07 - Michigan primary may not happen State of Michigan: Primaries, Freedom of Information Bev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:22 pm (NH) 11/07 - Pres primary date STILL not certain State of New Hampshire: PrimariesBev Harris 1 1 11-20-07 7:06 pm (OH) 11/07 - Provisionals may alter outcome Clermont County: Provisional ballotsBev Harris 1 1 11-19-07 5:54 pm (TX) 11/07 - Alteration of live election data in Harris County... Harris County: Voting systems, "Trust Me"Russell Novkov12 1 11-15-07 9:18 pm (US) 11/07 - Sequoia voting systems under new ownership US - VendorsBev Harris 1 1 11-9-07 6:39 am (OH) 11/07 - Polls open later in ES&S location Putnam County - Voting Machines: Incident ReportsPatricia Berg1 1 11-7-07 4:34 am (FL) 10/07 - Appeals court rules The People "moot" Sarasota County - LitigationBev Harris 1 1 11-2-07 8:02 am (CT) 10/07 - Candidate's company will transport voting machines... New Britain - Chain of CustodyBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 11:22 am (IN) 10/07 - Polling locations reduced to four "vote centers"... Tippecanoe County - Access to PollsBev Harris 1 1 10-29-07 8:12 am (FL) 10/07 - Wrong Ballots Sent To Miami Absentee Voters Miami-Dade County - Absentee / Mail-in Incident ReportBrant Lamb13 1 10-22-07 11:34 am (PA) 10/07 - County replacing WinVote Lackawanna County - Voting systems: Procurement Alan Brau43 1 10-18-07 7:56 pm (US) 9/07 - E-vote industry massaging itself in the media Voting systems: Security / Chain of CustodyBev Harris 52 1 10-14-07 11:07 am (OH) 10/07 - A funeral for a presidential election State of Ohio - Compliance, enforcement issuesAlan Brau3 1 10-11-07 4:32 pm (FL) 10/07 - Peculiar excuses block accountability for primary Martin County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-11-07 7:12 am (TX) 9/07 - Hilarious but improper: video of lawmakers cheat-voting... State of Texas - Noncompliance, enforcement issues with legislator voting rulesBrant Lamb11 1 10-3-07 5:06 am (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 testing continues... Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsRussell Novkov2 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (IN) 10/07 - Belly-up vendor, in come different machines Randolph County - Voting systems: ProcurementBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:57 pm (FL) 10/07 - FL-13 report imminent Sarasota County - Voting system: Review & testing due to incident reportsBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:46 pm (US) 9/07 - If MS Excel bug = math errors, trust e-voting? US - Computer program: Incident reportBev Harris 1 1 10-2-07 7:38 pm (NC) 9/07 - The registrar's secret lair Montgomery County - Chain of custodyBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 4:12 pm (NJ) 9/07 - Judge stalls on paper trail Mercer County - Compliance issue: Resisting paper trailBev Harris 1 1 10-1-07 3:46 pm (US) 9/07 - Less than 1/2 of military overseas votes counted US - Absentee / mail-in voting: Incidents, access problemsBev Harris 6 1 9-30-07 3:17 pm (GA) 9/07 - What's the punishment for throwing out 93,000 voter reg... Fulton County - Chain of custody / Privacy protection issuesBev Harris 1 1 9-28-07 9:12 am (US) 9/07 - Gird for massive new voting machine purchases: New stan... US - Voting systems: Standards, certification, procurementBrant Lamb16 1 9-27-07 5:02 am (PA) 9/07 County Commissioners' Assocation Opposes HR811 State of Pennsylvania - LegislationSamuel Scharff32 1 9-24-07 11:29 pm (CT) 9/07 - Voting rights activists express disappointment at CT s... State of Connecticut - Voting systems: Security Catherine Ansbro2 1 9-22-07 6:36 pm (NV) 9/07 - County to "prove Sequioa machines are secure"... Washoe County - Voting systems: SecurityBev Harris 1 1 9-22-07 9:43 am (IL) 9/07 - Indictment: Teamster Union vote rigging Teamster's Union [Chicago] - "Trust Me" failureBev Harris 1 1 9-8-07 4:48 pm (US) 2007 National news archive (see state foru... 130 24 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2006 National news archive (see state foru... 482 60 10-11-07 12:25 pm (US) 2005 National news archive (see state foru... 310 152 10-11-07 12:24 pm (US) 2004 National news archive (see state forums for state news)... 77 42 10-11-07 12:24 pm Start New Thread 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review Reviews Voted Most Helpful Votes are counted and displayed within 24 hours HM 1355196 37% Similar To You HM 1355196's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is an excellent documentary that I think every American should see before they vote again. This is not a movie about Bush vs. Kerry or Republicans vs. Democrats. Its about our current voting system and exposing a multitude of problems with that system as demonstrated in the 2004 election. We are told "EVERY VOTE COUNTS" and this documentary exposes the corruption, mistruths, and shameful negligence and mishandling of these "VOTES" in a way that cannot be denied nor ignored - unless you don't watch it for yourself. 73 out of 78 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful TerBo 40% Similar To You TerBo's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is a must-see documentary, especially for those still doubtful about whether elections in this country can be tampered with. The answer is yes, yes, yes!!! Kudos to Bev Harris who has dedicated years to exposing the corruption surrounding electronic voting. Get this. After Hacking Democracy's premiere on HBO, Harris received death threats. That's how risky and powerful her work is. 67 out of 77 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Shiftdnb 47% Similar To You Shiftdnb's other reviews > 4.0 Stars This is an amazing documentary showing that there are problems with the way we vote in America. When a normal everyday citizen gets up and challenges the system, you see how the system fights back. This woman doesn't give up like most of us would and shows us and one election official in Florida that the way our voting system was run and still is, has errors. 29 out of 36 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Most Recent Reviews SG 178412 23% Similar To You SG 178412's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Anyone who cares at all about the future of democracy in America (R or D or whatever else party affiliation you choose) NEEDS to see this movie. 1 out of 1 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful grw 970297 20% Similar To You grw 970297's other reviews > 5.0 Stars If our so-called government doesn't fix the problems exposed in this excellent documentary, our democracy no longer will exist. Abolish electronic voting machines!! I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Professional Bum 63% Similar To You Professional ...'s other reviews > 5.0 Stars If you are an American & have the ability to vote, please do yourself a favor and put this in your queue immediately(especially since this is an election year). This wonderful documentary proves my point that we have the best democracy that money can buy, along with our judicial system. This film is more frightening than any horror film I've seen, because THIS IS REAL! And this is movie biased? Not at all. It's an absolute eye opener that shows that your vote really doesn't count; and make sure you watch the deleted scenes(another 33 minutes of fantastic footage). 1 out of 1 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews hawk5391 58% Similar To You hawk5391's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Even though I also watched the original slasher classic Black Christmas, this was the scariest movie I saw over the Christmas break. Although the filmmakers obviously have every reason to sensationalize potential problems with electronic voting systems ("good news is no news," right?), the implications here are frightening. Not only did Bev Harris (founder of a non-partisan watchdog group) find voting machine code unprotected on the internet, she was able to successfully hack it and prove that results could be manipulated (you can watch this being done in a matter of seconds in this film). The lack of oversight of the companies who control the majority of electronic voting is astounding, almost as bad as the sloppy manner in which our government oversees the elections themselves. 10 out of 10 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Cassun 53% Similar To You Cassun's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Probably the scariest movie I've watched in a long time. The production value isn't good, but its worth sitting through to find out just how easy it would be for just one person with an agenda to manipulate the outcome of an election. 9 out of 12 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful LR 572736 43% Similar To You LR 572736's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Politics in America is scarey enough, but when you see what is going on with our elections system, you will just go through the roof. We have hoped through the last few centuries that a government of the people, by the people and for the people would not parish from the face of the earth, and that America would be its shining example. After viewing this flick, you will realize just how tarnished our example has become. We have realized in the past decades, that money rules, and it just feels like our votes don't count, only the money that backs our politicians. Only the corporations and special interests have access to the politicians these days, not the people that vote. This picture goes a long way to explaining how that happens. After realizing the truths in this documentary, I feel even more helpless and useless to change a corrupt government by my vote. Did my vote get counted? How would I even know? The facts put forth in this program are just about incredible, but you come away realizing their powerful credibility. I wondered why their hasn't been criminal prosecution of the election fraud that is running rampant in our country today? Where are prosecuters? Why aren't elections officials who ignore our right to have our votes counted, recounter and certified being placed on trial for crimes against the electorate? You owe it to yourself and your country to see this documentary long before the next election. Don't miss this one! 8 out of 9 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful CP 1799900 36% Similar To You CP 1799900's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Wow. I just finished watching this documentary, and I can't believe what I heard and saw. This is not another Michael Moore speculative film that makes assumptions with no factual evidence. This is incredible. Everyone should see this film. It is truly an amazing look inside of our election system. 8 out of 9 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review SN 25968 62% Similar To You SN 25968's other reviews > 5.0 Stars We must all see this movie. It's not JUST about elections. It's about the undermining of our society, the breakdown. My opinion is that we should get away from secret voting and out into the public. Democracy is where WE THE PEOPLE elect our officials. You must see this to know why I write this. 4 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful JR 1824621 61% Similar To You JR 1824621's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This is what makes America great: a woman, with a full life, puts it all behind her because she has come across the ultimate injustice and knows that she must right it. This is the story of the creation of the group and webpage BlackBoxVoting.com Having found the Diebold's source code, a code that not even the President of the United States can see, Bev Harris takes the code to an expert. What is revealed causes Harris to criss cross America, to prove the fact that Diebold had literally hijacked democracy. Although it's possible, it's difficult to believe that anyone can think that the 2004 Presidential Election wasn't rigged after viewing this film. A 'must see' for every American. 4 out of 4 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PW 51% Similar To You PW's other reviews > 5.0 Stars One of the scariest movies I've ever seen... because it's true. If you liked 'All the presidents men' or 'The Insider' You'll like this movie. Actually come to think of it, what this story needs is a treatment like the above mentioned movies so the message could have a broader appeal beyond this documentary. 5 out of 6 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful FV 1232392 44% Similar To You FV 1232392's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Highly recommedable as the documentary reveals what we all have been suspecting and fearing in an objective and somewhat scientific way. It is quite timely, and I think we can all relate to the topic at hand. I was touched by the reaction of some of the people in the movie when they proved how the voting system can be hacked without much effort 4 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Steve Smith 38% Similar To You Steve Smith's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Unbelievable. That's how I describe this excellent documentary. Every citizen of the USA owes it to themselves to watch this documentary. It is just shocking. It calls into question everything we know about how our votes are recorded in this country. My jaw literally dropped when I saw one part of it. I won't ruin it for those who haven't seen it. You MUST watch this! 4 out of 4 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Ben5765 35% Similar To You Ben5765's other reviews > 4.0 Stars This film is all about voting machines and how votes are tabulated. It makes mincemeat of the Diebold Corporation, manufacturer of a large percentage of the electronic voting machines used in the United States. It reveals Diebold officials making lie after lie about the security of their machines. The makers of the film meticulously document how, using Diebold's machines and data cards, someone with just a basic understanding of the technology involved (including, certainly, any Diebold employee) could rig the vote count, on one machine or on thousands of them, with absolutely no record that the rigging was ever done. The film also reveals how Diebold's chief executive officer was (and maybe still is) a large contributor to the Republican Party. He once wrote a letter stating that he would "deliver" Ohio's electoral votes in the 2004 presidential election for George W. Bush. The film later shows how his company managed to persuade Cuyahoga County, Ohio (where Cleveland is) to buy its machines. Maybe there is nothing fishy going on there, but appearances matter! Lest the film be seen as partisan, it features, among others, a Republican office-seeker from Louisiana who, after losing her race, went to view a demonstration of the machines that the voters used. As part of the demonstration she pressed the button next to her name, and the machine registered a vote for her opponent. Hmmm. She was understandably troubled. Moreover, the film points out that in many parts of the country it is in fact the local Republican Party that is wary of electronic voting machines, not the Democrats. Hacking Democracy also reveals problems with punch card voting systems--problems that dwarf the famous "hanging chad" problem of the 2000 presidential vote count in Florida. The film's message is distressing, but it is one all American citizens should hear and see. 5 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AdriH 34% Similar To You AdriH's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Yes, the documentary could use a bit of editing, but the points raised are valid enough to keep it interesting. Instead of taking a partisan view on the movie, realize how intensly frightening this movie really is. Should it be just one grandmother's job to inform us how we're being duped? No. It's our responsibility as citizens to stay informed and demand voting accuracy. 5 out of 7 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful DM 1548398 12% Similar To You DM 1548398's other reviews > 4.0 Stars Frightening and timely documentary that exposes the very painful truth about the U.S. electoral system and vote count fraud. A must see if you plan to vote ever! 5 out of 5 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PM 748973 — —% Similar To You PM 748973's other reviews > 5.0 Stars This presentation should be shown to every high school junior and senior. Maybe they will be able to bring about the changes needed to restore our country to what it once was. Our democratic republic is long gone. 6 out of 6 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review Lee Anne and Tim 64% Similar To You Lee Anne and ...'s other reviews > 5.0 Stars Every voter should see this film. It leaves you with your head shaking, wondering how the history of the last 8 years might read if the vote-tampering exposed in Hacking Democracy hadnt been possible. Also a testament to how one regular person can make a difference, this documentary is very well done. Youll hate what you learn. 6 out of 10 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful yla 83539 39% Similar To You yla 83539's other reviews > 5.0 Stars SA 1674508, Yazheirx, JR 65420, RS 305556, their reviews are absolutely the threat that we all have about democracy. It is because their kind of ignorance that this movie is a 5 star and a must for every single human being to watch and learn. There is no excuse for any voting system to be too technical, too complex, too secret that we cannot prove what the votes were years from when the votes were taken. Not even 50 years, not even 100 years, not even 1000 years, not ever. For anyone to suggest that the electronic voting system is not possible to understand and to do a documentary for by a handful of heroic citizens, it is an insult to this country and democracy. Let these be the commandments of election: 1) No voting methods should be more complicated than what pen/pencil can do on a ballot. 2) Vote handling in any election process should be transparent to the public no matter when, why, how, what, who. 3) Only 100% accuracy should be accepted. Anything less then 100% should be recounted no matter how many times, how long it takes, and how much it cost to be 100% accurate. 4) Without 100% accuracy, election cannot be concluded. Another election should be conducted immediately without further delay. 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful ayi 554466 35% Similar To You ayi 554466's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Factual information clearly presented. I fear it is all too true and I fear for the next election. 5 out of 8 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AL 1659593 33% Similar To You AL 1659593's other reviews > 2.0 Stars For content, I'd give it 3 stars. It was an eye-opening look at the problems at the flaws of the "touch screen" and memory card system. What turned me off was the overboard emotions and cheesy speeches from the women of the watchdog groups. 4 out of 6 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful TD 1852913 31% Similar To You TD 1852913's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I simply cannot believe this is true. I simply cannot believe the voting process is so secretive! I am still in High School and I could probably devise a system more secure than what every American trusts to count their votes! Every American owes it to themselves to watch this incredible docudrama of corporate greed, secrecy, corruption, and lies. Every American. 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful AK 817970 29% Similar To You AK 817970's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I would have to agree with everyone else in stating this a must see film for everyone. I was shocked and surprised at how poorly designed the electronic voting system is. How corrupt the political voting process is. Without this video no one would have seen the voting process. Watch this film you won't regret it. 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful jes 881880 26% Similar To You jes 881880's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Eye opening. My question is, "Why haven't criminal investigations been started?!?" I agree with the majority of the comments saying we should all see this movie; i would add it's imperative we do something with what we know after watching it. Hold our representitives accountable!!! 3 out of 3 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful KS 608754 24% Similar To You KS 608754's other reviews > 5.0 Stars If this doesn't make people realize that we need to change how our elections are held, nothing will! Republicans and Democrats should be concerned...ALL AMERICANS should be concerned and angry. If any politician does not want to fix this system, that politician needs to leave their office. 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful PD 253868 22% Similar To You PD 253868's other reviews > 5.0 Stars I believe every citizen of voting age in the United States should view this film because it is very informative on the computerized voting systems across the country. After all, if our votes don't count we have no democracy. Watch this fim and tell your family, friends and co-workers to do the same! 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful xpf 1252893 12% Similar To You xpf 1252893's other reviews > 4.0 Stars The content is compelling and if even half of it is true, our democracy is very troubled. We need to demand truth and accuracy at the polls and we need to take action NOW! 2 out of 2 people found this review helpful. Member Reviews 59 customers reviewed this movie. Write a Review DH 1154150 62% Similar To You DH 1154150's other reviews > 5.0 Stars Watch this movie. Tell your friends and family to watch this movie. The subjects are intelligent, articulate, and extremely courageous. This movie shows compelling evidence that makes me want to learn more about how easy it has been to alter the "results" of our government's elections, and ask what we can do to stop the fraud! 4 out of 7 people found this review helpful. I found this review Click to rate this review as helpful Yazheirx 57% Similar To You Yazheirx's other reviews > 2.0 Stars Like several other reviewers I wanted to like this movie but the spin and lack of solution suggestions prevented me. I agree with the need for more transparency with voting machines. I think we should have an open source voting program such that interest groups can spend their money to improve them. I still could not get past the spin. The final documentary cardinal sin for me is -

newer horizon demanded in usa politicking. can non natural born + nonbinding resolution senate run pres U S ?