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Kids Jokes Knowledge Base
Kids Jokes? We were discussing this in work. There are three jokes from our childhood. 1. Say Hi to your knee....haha so funny 2. How do you scare a bee....say boo bee... yes again haha But, we couldn't remember the third one. Anyone have a better memory than us? Remember these are kid jokes. Thanks!
kids Jokes!!!? Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have? Ted: $10. Teacher: You don't know maths. Ted: You don't know my father! -------- Mother: David, come here. David: Yes, mom? Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse. David: But I will only get my report book tomorrow. Mother: I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now. -------- Man: How old is your father? Boy: As old as me Man: How can that be? Boy: He became a father only when I was born ---------- Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything! Son: That's why I say she's no good! -------- A boy came home from school with his exam results. "What did u get?" asked his father. "My marks are under water," said the boy. "What do u mean 'under water'?" "They are all below 'C' (sea) level"
Anyone know any inappropriate jokes to tell my kids? So I really like telling my kids jokes and making them laugh. The problem is, I've told them all of them, and they know the punchline every time. Suggestions? Sorry guys, I meant appropriate. :P
Boyfriend jokes about having kids and me being pregnant? My boyfriend will say things about having kids, or jokes about baby things. I don't perticularly want kids right now. I have asked him why he jokes all the time ( to me it seems like he's coming up with excuses to talk about kids), he says he doesn't know why he jokes about it. I'm wondering why? Does anybody else have similar experiences? Ps, don't say "ask him", I have!
Do kids tell jokes and riddles on Halloween where you live? Some of our kids friends from California and Indiana said they just get the candy and no one asks kids for a joke.
Is there any website that provides acess to only clean jokes suitable for kids? The site should not contain non veg jokes. Clean jokes are for school kids.
Really good jokes to make fun of kids? I need some really good jokes to make fun of kids. Mostly kids that are fat jokes and stupid jokes. Also some faguet jokes...lmao. Even if its not one of these just tell me cuz i still wanna hear it...thank you to all.
How do you stop kids from cracking jokes about a teacher's questionable sexuality? There is this teacher who I observe. He keeps everything professional, always on task and never gets sidetracked from the topic at hand. I've seen some kids make fun of his questionable sexuality. He has never alluded to them what gender he prefers to date outside of class. I'm assuming that they're getting their impressions from his feminine looking face and slender build. I've always wanted to be a math teacher but not in an environment like this where my sexuality will be questioned and laughed at by my students.
what r some good pepito jokes for kids? i want to tell some pepito jokes to my lil cuz but i don't know alot...english or spanish alloud but for kids.
Looking for some great kids jokes to tell my ESL students? I teach children in Taiwan and they love hearing jokes. But I'm running out. If you know some, please spread around the world!! xiexie (thank you!)
Where can you get valentine's jokes for kids? I really want a valentine joke or riddle for my kid! Can you get me one?
what are some funny jokes for younger kids to tell? my four 1/2 year old likes to tell jokes but her jokes are usually about poop :( which is not good especially since she is starting school this september so i was wondering if anyone knows so funny jokes that my pre schooler can say/tell?
What are the best websites to get jokes from? Looking for any kind of jokes, from kids to adult. Thanks :)? If You could give me as many as you know of I would very much appreciate it.. Im looking for jokes to make people laugh, Even jokes on billboards, Kids jokes, Adult jokes.. Anything that you know of really, I appreciate it alot. Thanks :)
Do you think one of gods little jokes with kids is? that to have them most of the time you are in a committed relationship. My 2 yr son is like a babe magnet with his hiiiis, but I cant do anything about it. Do you think this is one of gods little jokes on dad's
When will Letterman make similar jokes about Obama and kids to prove it's to just "get a laugh"? Let CBS and Letterman put their money where their mouth is. If it's really to get a laugh and only for entertainment then prove it. No one should be exempt from your tasteless jokes. The proof is in the pudding.
Does any one know of a web site that E-Mails jokes for kids that are clean? I just wanted to find one for my daughter.
Where can I find very funny jokes that kids would like? I want funny not lame.
I need jokes for my mexican puppet that aren't racist for kids? We are putting on a kids program... I need jokes that are funny in a spanish accent... FOR KIDS!!! Nothing racist or dirty please!
What's the name of a good site with jokes for kids? I have three boys and the oldest loves jokes but i want the ones he learns to be suited for his age, which is almost 9. Are there any good,clean sites?
Hilariously funny but yet mature jokes to tell young kids? im 28 and i have to babysit my sisters kids there teens and i need some really funny jokes to tell them they think im boring
Jokes about little kids? I'm looking for jokes about little kids who say something funny. It's for a message in church and I need something funny to help me in my first sermon. So good, "Little kid jokes" would be great. A religious touch would be perfect too. The person with the best... and most... jokes wins! damaged goods... I don't get it Just keep in mind I'm preaching this stuff... But I didn't get the first one
What are some jokes for kids? Like: where does a bee go pee? at a BP station! Why do gorillas have big nostrils? so their fingers will fit in them! Please help me with this .. my 4 yr old LOVES these kind of jokes!!
Looking for jokes for kids? Need to find a few clean kids jokes. Q & A type. I've gone through books and sites and used the funny ones already. HELP! These are great! A couple of them made me laugh out loud! The kids are gona love them. Thanks everyone!
Do you think the popsicle stick jokes are funny or cheesy? What about your kids? I just read my 6 year old niece one that said: What did the baker get his wife for her birthday?...Flour. She didn't laugh, so I told her the other one that said: Why did the policeman give the balloon a ticket? Because it was breaking the law of gravity....Again, nothing. I'm out of material. She told me they really needed to hire someone else to make the jokes.
As i am getting violations again xxxx kids jokes xxsorry folks xxxx funny or not xxx? What do you get when you cross poison ivy and a four leaf clover? A rash of good luck! What do you get when you cross a cheetah & a hamburger? Fast Food! What do you get when you cross a hula dancer with a boxer? A Hawaiian Punch! What do you get when you cross a Mustang and an elephant? A convertible with a big trunk! What do you get when you cross a vampire with a mosquito? A very itchy neck! What do you get when you cross a chicken and a cow? Roost beef! What do you get when you cross Batman & Robin with a steamroller? Flatman & Ribbon! What do you get when you cross a clown with a goat? A Silly Billy!
Boyfriend jokes about having kids? My boyfriend will say things about having kids, or jokes about baby things. I don't perticularly want kids right now. I have asked him why he jokes all the time ( to me it seems like he's coming up with excuses to talk about kids), he says he doesn't know why he jokes about it. I'm wondering why? Does anybody else have similar experiences? Ps, don't say "ask him", I have!
some more kids jokes should these ones be deleted from my archive as well as they are old? Q. What kind of Mexican food can give you frostbite? A. A Burrr-ito! Q. Do you file your nails? A. No, I throw them away. Q. What's the difference between a butcher and an insomniac? A. One weighs a steak and the other stays awake. Q. Why did the boy throw the butter out the window? A. He wanted to see a butterfly. Q. What do you call a Hippie's wife? A. Mississippi. Q. What's the difference between Roast Beef and Pea Soup? A. Anyone can roast beef. Q. What happened to the wooden car with wooden wheels and a wooden engine? A. It wooden go. Q. What's bright orange and sounds like a parrot? A. A Carrot. Q. Why did the Cyclops close his school? A. He only had one Pupil. Q. What's Black and White and Red all over. A. A Newspaper! (One of the classic Best Kids Jokes.) Q. Who can tell someone where to 'get off' and get away with it? A. A Bus Driver.
My boyfriend jokes about having kids? My boyfriend will say things about having kids, or jokes about baby things. I don't perticularly want kids right now. I have asked him why he jokes all the time ( to me it seems like he's coming up with excuses to talk about kids), he says he doesn't know why he jokes about it. I'm wondering why? Does anybody else have similar experiences? Ps, don't say "ask him", I have! Oh yeah, were in our mid 20's
Can you help with any mum jokes suitable for kids? Thanks in advance.
Why do kids joke about rape so much? My 11 year old son ALWAYS jokes about it and I am aware 19 and younger kids do it too. Why?
what is a good site for jokes for kids? I would like to find some clean jokes for preteens.
who else is sick of all those stupid Michael Jackson jokes that kids make up? the mum said where's my purse and then the retarded son said "Michael Jackson took it" WTF?? It does'nt make sence!! who else is sick of them??
How come if a teacher only passed kids who liked him and laughed at his jokes and thought he was a good? teacher and failed genius students that didn't like him would be fired, but Jesus gets away with sending the best students (i.e. the people with the most morals who follow his teachings but don't believe in him) to hell?
Why are kids in school homophobic but then go on to make gay jokes about themselves? Are they just horny? Cuz I don't remember the people I grew up with ever doing that. They were super tolerant of gays and that didnt change.
What snacks sold in the US have jokes or interesting facts on the packet? On the back of the packet, which brand of snacks like crisps or popcorn have kids jokes or random facts about stuff like animals and countries etc. Did you know? - kind of facts.
Do you know any cheesy jokes for kids ? Just for fun, I am looking for " cheesy jokes for kids " The best one gets the 50 points and lots of thumbs up
School kids playing jokes on me? Okay, so there are these kids at my school and they are like playing jokes mostly on facebook such as asking me if im dating ''isaiah'' which im obviously not, cause i dont even know him. So later on, he wrote on my facebook wall ''hey babe?!'' and 2 people from that group ''liked'' it. So it's obviously a huge joke..what should I do about it? And why do they do it? And is it common for school kids to do that??
What are some good jokes to tell a 7 year old? My grand daughter is on this kick of telling jokes to me that she hears from her friends at school. Then she asks me to tell one but I've grown too old to remember much of ANYthing, much less kids jokes! Can you lead me to a kids jokes website or tell me a few of your own? Remember, keep it clean & appropriate for a 7 year old!!!
Tell me some short funny kids jokes? Stuff that is really quick and funny... Like... Me: Oh no, is your butt broken? Daughter: NO! Me: Well why does it have a crack in it? Both: Hahahhahahahahahaha
Anyone got any adult themed one liner good jokes? I don't really want lame kids jokes, but anything that'll make me giggle would be good. Here's one to get you started..... A man I know has a dog with no legs, he named him Cigarette, because every night he takes him out for a drag.
halloween jokes for kids? anyone know any kids holloween jokes they can't be too long my sons only 7 and he'll never remember the punch line
John Cena is now soo booooring. He and his PG jokes for kids needs to go? What do you think?
ok been told not enough kids jokes so next 3 are for the kids? Q: How do electric eels taste? A: Shocking! . Q: What is Father Christmas's wife called A: Mary Christmas! . Q: What do you get if you cross a Spice Girl with a Takeaway? A: Egg Fried Spice! Q: Where do spiders play football? A: Webley! Q: Why is it hard to play cards in the jungle? A: There are too many cheetahs! . Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a fish? A: Swimming Trunks! . Q: What do you give an injured lemon? A: Lemonade! Q: Why did the boy take a pencil to bed? A: Because he wanted to draw the curtains! Q: Have you heard the joke about the butter ? A: I can't tell you because you will spread it. Q: WHAT DID THE LION SAY WHEN HE SAW THE KID ON HIS SKATE BOARD? A: MEALS ON WHEELS Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: No idea (no eyed deer)
kids jokes on biology test? there's a biology test for the 13yr old kids in this school. The teacher insist them to draw the human sex organ. One of the boy peek into his pants and a girl saw this, so she complaint to the teacher saying " teacher.. there's a boy copying".
kids jokes, do you have any? I need very clean jokes like: what do you call Batman and Robin after they get ran over by a steam roller? Flatman and Ribbon! thanks everyone!!
Need riddles/jokes for Vacation Bible School kids, please? I'm volunteering at our church's vacation bible school. I need riddles/jokes for kids ages 4 through 12. No theme, but, obviously, they need to be clean!! Prefer riddles, it's great to watch then try and figure them out. I have three teen boys, the jokes they bring home won't fit the bill....
If I make videos on youtube some for kids (arithmetic tricks) and some for adults jokes etc any what is the? best way to do it as I would not want young kids picking up swear words .
Does anyone know some clean funny jokes for kids in 3-6 grade? I am the master of ceremonies for our school talent show and I need some ideas to say for acts. Can anyone help me? The acts I am introducing are Forget You, Philosiphy, Out Here on my Own, Change for Good, and Price Tag. Also there is Big Girls don't Cry and the Friday song by Rebecca Black (god I hate that song).
looking for kids jokes? My son is going to be in his elementry school talent show. He has chosen to tell some jokes. The two he has picked so far are: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it didn't have the guts Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't been invented yet he wants some more like these.
Kids bee jokes lol? KIDS AND BEE JOKES………….. •What kind of bees hum and drop things? A fumble bee! •What did the bee say to the flower? Hello honey! •How does a queen bee get around her hive? She's throne! •What does the bee Santa Claus say? Ho hum hum! •What do bees chew? Bumble gum! •What does a bee say before it stings you? This is going to hurt me a lot more than it hurts you! •What's a bee-line? The shortest distance between two buzz-stops! •What is a baby bee? A little humbug! •Can bees fly in the rain? Not without their little yellow jackets! •Why did the bee started talking poetry? He was waxing lyrical! •What goes zzub, zzub? A bee flying backwards! •What are the cleverest bees? Spelling bees! •Why do bees buzz? Because they can't whistle! •What kind of bee can't be understood? A mumble bee! •What does a bee get at McDonalds? A humburger! •What kind of bee can keep an aeroplane dry? An aero-drone! •What do you call a bee who's had a spell put on him? He's bee-witched! •Where do bees keep their money? In a honey box! •Why did the bees go on strike? Because they wanted more honey and shorter working flowers! •What did the bee to the other bee in summer? Swarm here isn't it! •What is a bee's favorite classical music composer? Bee-thoven! •Who writes books for little bees? Bee-trix Potter! •What's a bees favorite novel? The Great Gats-bee! •What bee is good for your health? Vitamin bee! •What buzzes, is black and yellow and goes along the bottom of the sea? A bee in a submarine! •What's more dangerous than being with a fool? Fooling with a bee! •What did the confused bee say? To bee or not to bee! •What's black, yellow and covered in blackberries? A bramble bee! •Who is the bees favorite pop group? The bee gees! •What do you get if you cross a bee with a skunk? An animal that stinks and stings! •Who is the bees favorite singer? Sting! •What does a queen bee do when she burps? Issues a royal pardon! •What did the spider say to the bee? Your honey or your life! •Who is a bee's favorite painter? Pablo Beecasso! •Why do bees have sticky hair? Beacuse of the honey combs! •What is black and yellow and buzzes along at 30,000 feet? A bee is an aeroplane. •Why do bees hum? Because they've forgotten the words! •What's a bees favorite flower? A bee-gonias! •What do bees do if they want to use public transport? Wait at a buzz stop! •What is the bees favorite film? The Sting! •What goes hum-choo, hum choo? A bee with a cold! •What do you get if you cross a bee with a door bell? A hum dinger! •What TV station do bees watch? Bee bee c one! •What did the bee say to the naughty bee? Bee-hive yourself! •How many bees do you need in a bee choir? A humdred! •Why did the queen bee kick out all of the other bees? Because they kept droning on and on! •Where do bees go on holiday? Stingapore! •What do you call a bee born in May? A maybe! And finally…what would you like to say to Jake right now….Bee Gone you **** ** *** ***!
Do you know any good sites for kids jokes and riddles? My 3 year is obssesed with learning riddles and I want some new one for her to learn.
we use to get yahoo kids jokes but can't open the page please help us.. thanks? we use to be able to go to "yahooligans! jokes". We can still go there and play some games but we can't get into the jokes, we submitted a knock knock joke, and still can't read any. Please help. and Thanks..
Old Jokes & Kids? I guess, this is aimed mainly at those who either work w/ kids, have their own or look after them in some capacity. Have you ever had a kid tell you joke that *you* heard/told when you were little? They have no idea the joke is as old as the hills & you're amazed kids are even still Telling them! One I say scrawled on a desk (4th/5th graders): "What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on the bug?" (We know the old punchline) :) Any others? Babiee- I forgot about ICUP! I remember I did that one to my grandmother when I was around 8! lol!
Help me with some good jokes to share with kids? We are invited with family for our friend's son's 9th birthday. There are going to be many kids of this age, including my kids. We want to tell some good jokes to the kids. Can you suggest some good jokes? Thanks in advance.
its time for the kids jokes today folks funny or not? Once three people were talking. One person said, "My wife read The Tale of Two Cities and got twins. Then the second person said that his wife read The Three Little Pigs and got triplets. Then the third person said "Oh my gosh! I have to go home quickly! "Why?" The others asked. Punchline "Because when I left home my wife was reading Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves!"
Do you like kids jokes? The little boy greeted his grandmother with a hug and said, "I'm so happy to see you grandma. Now maybe daddy will do the trick he has been promising us." The grandmother was curious. "What trick is that my dear," she asked. The little boy replied, "I heard daddy tell mommy that he would climb the walls if you came to visit us again." >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> A 7-year old child was drawing a picture of the Nativity. The picture was very good, including Mary, Joseph and, of course, baby Jesus. However, there was a fat man standing in the corner of the stable, that just did not seem to fit in. When the child was asked about it, she replied, "Oh, That's Round John Virgin." >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present. "Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?" Five small voices answered in unison. "You do, Daddy!" >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Little Johnny's father had just returned home from a business trip, and he had a romantic evening planned with his wife. So, he sent his two older kids to the movies, but he couldn't persuade Little Johnny to go along. Finally, he made a deal with Little Johnny. "If you go sit outside of the house, I'll give you five dollars for every man you see go by in a red hat." An excited Little Johnny agreed. Some time later, Little Johnny ran into the house and up to his parents' bedroom. He banged on the door and shouted, "Hey, Dad, if you think your getting screwed in THERE, just wait until you come outside 'cause there's a Shriner convention going past our house."
Why do republicans make jokes about democrats' kids and then somehow think their own kids are off limits? John McCain made this odious joke about Chelsea Clinton back in '98. Why is Chelsea Clinton so ugly? Because her father is Janet Reno." -- Sen. John McCain, speaking to a Republican dinner, June 1998.
Is our education system for younger kids a joke? I've been watching the debates and some politicians say we need to put more money into the education of kids at a young age like K-5th grades. But isn't K-5 really a joke now? I remember in 1st grade being told Columbus discovered America, and in 7th I was told, guess what, the vikings did LONG before Columbus. Also in 1st grade, we were taught they're are 3 stages of matter, solid, liquid, and gas. In 9th grade I remember being told there are 4 stages of matter, Solid, Liquid, Gas, and Plasma. And for those who say that we're just finding out about new discoveries and all of that, plasma has been around for a while, and it's been known that Columbus didn't discover America, so why do we keep telling little kids all of this and just say in a few years it wasn't true, and then we still want to put money into these "lies" ? It doesn't stop there. In middle or high school pretty much everyone remembers reading Romeo and Juliet, the story of 2 teenagers who couldn't be together so they killed themselves because they were in "love". Now if any teenagers say they love each other we say it's not "true" love and send them off to a phyciodrist, but we're still pushing Romeo and Juliet on them. It just doesn't make sense to me.
What kids' jokes (5 - 10yo) have made you chuckle as a parent? My daughter's 25 now but I still remember the day she came home from school 20 years ago and asked my missus and me why squirrels swim on their backs. We thought it was something she was learning at school so we encouraged her to answer for us. "To keep their nuts dry," she said. Completely straight-faced. We had to leave the room before we gave vent... Anyone else had similar?
Why do kids joke around so bad? I am in high school, and I just wen to the doctor for a check up. I am 5'7 and weigh 149 pounds and am 15 years old (boy) Today someone made fun of me by saying that I had bigger boobs than some girl. Was he making fun of the girl or me? And even if he was making fun of me, why would he say that, like, my whole family says I am thin, and my doctor says I am no whwere near overweight. Why are high school kids so mean?
really funny kids jokes? Kids Are Quick ____________________________________ TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS: Maria. ____________________________________ < /SPAN> TEACHER: John , why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ < /DIV> TEACHER: Glenn , how do you spell 'crocodile?' GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' TEACHER: No, that's wrong GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. ____________________________________________ TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD: H I J K L M N O. TEACHER: What are you talking about? DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O. __________________________________ TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WINNIE: Me! __________________________________________ TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty? GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. _______________________________________ TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.' MILLIE: I is.. TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.' MILLIE: All right... ;'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.' _________________________________ TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand. ______________________________________ TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook. ______________________________ TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his? CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog. ___________________________________ TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? HAROLD: A teacher __________________________________
a few kids jokes now are these funny or not? Dumb Mom Not all kids think their moms are smart. Did you hear about the five year old boy who was sent to his room by his mother for having a bit of a tantrum and calling her dumb? After about fifteen minutes, the mother went to his room to see if he was repentant. She found that her son had regained his composure. He calmly and politely said to her, "But Mom, you really are dumb." I'd Like to See That "Oh, boy! I'm glad you're here," the little boy said to his grandmother on his mother's side. "Why?" she asked. "Because now Daddy will do the trick he's been promising us." "What trick?" "Well, he told Mommy that if you came to visit, he would climb the walls." Child Psychology A new teacher thought she would use what she learned in her psychology courses. She said to her class, "Everyone who thinks they are stupid, please stand up." After a few seconds, one boy stood. "Do you think you're stupid?" she asked. "No, ma'am, but I just didn't want you to have to stand there all by yourself."
Looking for good, clean knock knock jokes for kids.? Got any good ones?
why make rude jokes about kids? I can handle a rude joke, but to go on about little kids is just too much. First off there are some kids on here and second its just immoral. Say what ever you like about sex and race but not kids. Am I the only one who feels this way? I am refering mostley to the rude sex remarks and death or beating remarks made in an attempt to be funny, they are just uncalled for.
Jokes for little kids!? i am making a book out of construction paper for my little neighbor and i want to know some kid friendly jokes for her.and if you have anymore ideas to put in the book please tell me. the little girl is 3 years old so no bad or stupid jokes ok and no saying that it was dead
Parents: Do you play April Fool's jokes on your kids? My son is only 7 months so I cant do anything to him. But I remember being young and my mother always *tried* to do silly April Fools jokes, or told us things thinking we would believe it. Do you play April Fools Jokes on your children? What kinds of things have you done?
Which is more pathedic? Sarah Palin not teaching her kids birth control or David Letterman's jokes? Sarah Palin has two children who experienced teen pregnancies. You'd think they'd learn their lesson after the first one. Why couldn't Willow learn from what happened to her sister Bristol?
bad jokes you've heard from your kids...? what are some of the jokes your kids have told you,that only kids seem to find funny. mine.... how can you tell if a fly is a oy or a girl? if it lands on the remote it's a boy if it lands on the phone it's a girl.
are there any kids jokes? I do not have kids i just want to tell some to my little 4 year old brother
Christmas Jokes for kids? Right now I'm making a card for a terminally ill little boy--all he wants for Christmas is a big box of cards, which is probably the sweetest, most depressing thing I've ever heard. But I wanted to put something beside 'Merry Christmas' on the card. Can you think of any jokes that are appropriate for little kids? -Thank- you, Paperbag! That icicle one was too cute! Lol--these are great! Thanks for answering
dumb kids jokes? what did the ocean say to the shore? what has four wheels and flies? why doesnt a chicken wear underwear? why do we park on the driveway and drive on the parkway? whos buried in grants tomb?
Can you help me find corny animal jokes for kids? Does anyone know of a website that has corny animal jokes appropriate for children? Much Appreciated...CW
Kids jokes, but still funny? 1. Where did the general keep his armies? 2. Why did the clock jump out the window? lol close, its 1. up his sleevies!! 2. to see if time flies
kids jokes no2 funny or not? What did the rug say to the floor? I've got you covered! What do you get when you cross an elephant with Darth Vador? An ele-vador! Why did the tomato change? Because he saw the salad dressing too! What did the announcer name his son? Mike! What did the skunk do when he went in the house? He odored everyone not to move! What did one ice cube say to another ice cube? You are so cool! What did one eye say to the other eye? Between you and me, something smells! What did one mathbook say to the other? I really got a lot of problems!
Teachers & kids jokes? What’s the difference between a headteacher and a packet of toffees? People like toffees What did one maths book say to the other? “Boy, have I got problems” The first form were being taught to say Grace before school dinner, but Jonathan didn’t join in. “Don’t you say a prayer before dinner at home?” asked the teacher “No, Miss, my mum can cook.” Nemesis why are you late for class this morning? I was dreaming about A Manchester United match at Old Trafford But why did that make you late Sir Alex forgot to tell the ref to blow the whistle after 90mins. Please Miss, are slugs nice to eat? Disgusting boy, eat your lunch! Now we are in registration what was it about slugs, child? Too late now Miss you had one on your lettuce! Teacher to pupil slouching in chair,” for goodness sake child, take that gum out of your , and put your feet in this instant.” How do you make a teacher laugh during the end of term holiday? Tell them a joke at the start of term! These were intended for big kids and younger usesr, especially at this time! If these are liked and shared with nephews and neices, that makes it worth the effort
oops nearly forgot the kids jokes? Why did the chicken cross the road? Don't ask us, ask the chicken! Why did the sheep cross the road? To get to the Baa Baa Shop for a haircut. Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the udder side. Why did the fish cross the river? To get to its school Why did the fish cross the sea? To get to the other tide! Why did the one-handed skeleton cross the road? To get to the second-hand shop! Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he had no body to go with. Why did the horse cross the road? To reach his Nay-borhood. Why did the rooster cross the road? To prove he wasn't a chicken. Why did the turtle cross the road? To get to the Shell Station. Why did the dog cross the road? To get to the barking lot.
Need Some Kids Jokes To Be Answered...? Where Do Sheep Get A Hair Cut? Whey Did They Pour Starch On The Theif? How Do Skeletons Send Mail? How Did The Musician Keep His Sousaphone Clean?
are these kids jokes funn? What did the little mountain say to the big mountain? Hi Cliff! What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes? Doyouthinkysarus! What did the robot say when his battery went dead? AC Come, AC Go! What did Pooh say to his agent? Show me the honey! What's the last thing you take off before going to sleep? Your feet off the floor! What rock group has four men that don't sing? Mount Rushmore! What should you do when you're dying? Go into the living room & eat life savers! What has four legs but doesn't move? A table! What is H204? Drinking!
I need kids jokes!!!!? Please keep them clean and make them funny!
kids jokes number2? Q: If there were ten cats in a boat and one jumped out, how many would be left? A: None were left! All the rest were copy cats! Q: What part of grapes is most explosive? A: Wine a mite! Q: Which meringues always come back? A: Boomerangs Q: Why did the cook hunt his eggs ? A: Because he liked them poached! Q: What is tall,sweet and french ? A: The trifle tower! Q: Where were lemons first found? A: In a tree! Q: Where was the Queen of England crowned? A: On her head! Q: What's black and white and green and black and white? A: Two Zebras fighting over a pickle. Q: What did one penny say to the other penny? A: If we get together, we could make some cents. Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? A: He had no guts. Q: What did the snail say when he got a ride on a turtle? A: WEEEEEEEEE. Q: Why did the mummy go to jail????? A: becase he had a bum wrap!!!!!
kids jokes again funny or not? Q. What did the elf use to make him taller? A. He used elf raising flour. What did the traffic light say to the car? Don't look, I'm changing. What do you call a girl with the Titanic on her head? Mandy lifeboats. Who was the first underwater spy? James Pond. What has webbed feet and fangs? Count Quackula. What dog smells of onions? A hot dog. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut. Teacher: Give me a sentence with the word 'analyze' in it. Pupil: My sister Anna lies in bed until nine o'clock. Which soldiers smell of salt and pepper? Seasoned troopers.
its time for the kids jokes folks so here is a few chicken jokes are these funny? Q: What do you call the outside of a hand green-egg? A: The bombshell! Q: What does an alarm cluck say? A: "Tick-tock-a-doodle-do!" Q: Why does a chicken coop have two doors? A: Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan! Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side! Q: What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy? A: "You scratch my beak and I'll scratch yours!" Q: How long do chickens work? A: Around the cluck! Q: Why did the chicken cross the road half way? A: He wanted to lay it on the line! Q: What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon? A: They go on peck-nics! Q: Why did the chick disappoint his mother? A: He wasn't what he was cracked up to be! Q: Is chicken soup good for your health? A: Not if you're the chicken! Q: Why did the chicken cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide!
some more kids jokes are these old now or are they still funny? Q: What should you say when you meet a ghost? A: "How do you boo?" Q: What did the policeman say when a spider ran down his back? A: "You're under a vest!" Q: Why do dragons sleep during the day? A: So they can fight knights. . Q: How does a witch tell time? A: She looks at her witch watch. Q: What would you find on a haunted beach? A: A sand witch. Q: Who is the dogs favourite comedian? A: Growlcho Marx. Q: Why did the chicken cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide. Q: Why did the turkey cross the road? A: It was the chickens day off. Q: What do you give a sick pig? A: Oinkment
Y do little kids crack bad jokes? Y do little kids always crack baddd Jokes! I dnt understand why 8 year olds crack jokes that are sexually realated. I do it but im older!
will these kids jokes receive a violation notice like yesterday? What did the cowboy say when his dog left? Doggone What did one ear say to the other ear? Between us we have brains! What do you call two people who embarrass you in front of your friends? Mum and Dad! Why did the one-handed man cross the road? To get to the second-hand shop! How do you make a band stand? Hide all their chairs! Why do golfers take an extra pair of socks? In case they get a hole in one! What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug What did one tooth say to the other tooth? The dentist is taking me out today! Why did the chocolate chip cookie visit the doctor? He was feeling crumby. How did the farmer fix his jeans? With a cabbage patch! Why was the broom late? It over-swept! What did the mother broom say to the baby broom? Go to sweep, dear. What do you call a boy mermaid? A merdude! What did one magnet say to the other magnet? I find you very attractive! How many Dads does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but he has to go to the store five times to get the right kind! What's red and flies and wobbles at the same time ? A jelly copter! What do you call a girl with sausages on her head? Barbie! What did the policeman say to his stomach? You're under a VEST! Why did the police wake the child? Because they'd heard there'd been a kid napping! Why was the police officer under the blanket? Because he was an under cover cop!
ok time for the kids jokes and yes some of them are groaners but still funny yes or no? What kind of tree does the math teacher have? Geome-tree!!!! !How do you make seven an even number? Remove the "S" Which knight helped King Arthur build his round table? Sir Cumference! What are ten things you can always count on? Your fingers! What do you call three feet of trash? A junk yard! (3 feet = 1 yard) How does a cow add? With a cow-culator! Why is a long nose only 11 inches long? Because if it was 12 inches long, it would become a foot! Why can't you say 288 in public? Its two gross! What goes up and never comes down? Your age! Math teacher:If you were 7 last year, how old will you be next year? Kid:Nine Math teacher:Impossible! Kid:No it isn't teacher, I'm eight today! What can you put in a bucket of water to make it lighter? A hole! What did the pine cone say when he grew up? Gee, I'm A Tree! (geometry!)
a few kids jokes funny or not xxx? A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am." After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys." One particular four-year-old prayed, "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets." A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
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